What makes a SOLDIER
by A Heart For My Nobody
Summary: Cloud dreams to be a SOLDIER. Zack just wants to apologize. When chance places them in a mission together once again, it creates a friendship that could change both of their lives forever. This story is placed in Crisis Core chronology. Pairing:Zack/Cloud
1. A SOLDIER's Pastime Part 1

**Chapter One: A SOLDIER's Pastime

* * *

**

**Zack**

I met him a while ago. Further back then he probably thought. It was Tuesday, and I had the first mission I'd ever been assigned to do without the supervision of my mentor, Angeal. I was so excited to prove myself as a member of SOLDIER that I barely slept the previous night. In fact, I hadn't slept at all until finally collapsing after some squats somewhere around five thirty in the morning. I only slept for about two hours, but unfortunately I was supposed to be ready to head out with the squad at _seven_ thirty, and instead I was on my stomach, arm hanging off the bed and drooling on the bunches of comforter I turned into a makeshift pillow. Of course, as soon as I opened an eye wide enough to see my clock, I was racing down the halls of the Shinra Building like a madman. I didn't even stop to silence my alarm clock which had apparently been going since six. I got a little email about that later in the day from a friend of mine I was bunking with at the time.

I was a little more than half-way to the squad when I nearly ran down my mentor in the halls. I was as quick to inform him of my rush as he was to inform me that I had forgotten my sword. This day was not off to a good start. So I ran back the other direction, maybe even faster, if that was possible. It wasn't long until I ran into another person in the halls, and there was no 'nearly' about this. I full out threw this person to the floor, not quite falling myself, and side-stepped him to get closer to my destination. This was when I met him. He was an infantryman, quite obviously, with his dorky knee pads and shoulder guards. He wasn't in a helmet, probably because our collision made it role about six feet down the hall, and in my rush, that's probably the only thing that made me double take and turn back to him.

"Hey, sorry about that, man. Let me help you out. I'm Zack Fair, SOLDIER second class." Is what I would have normally said. I liked to throw that title around; SOLDIER second class. I was always a lot more excited being a second class trying to make first than I had ever been after actually _making_ first. But that was complicated. Anyway, that would have been my response _normally_, but instead it came out something like, "Oh, sorry! In a hurry!" And then I was off again. At least _physically_ I was off again. My mind stuck to that scene for a minute, starting on 'Wow, that was rude of me', and moving on to 'For a second, I thought that guy was a girl'. You don't see too many blond haired guys in SOLDIER, well... except for commander Lazard. The thought of the commander only furthered my awareness of how late I was.

When I finally got to the squad, I was a little over a half-hour late. Luckily, being the only second class there with no firsts, I had nobody to yell at me. Interestingly enough, the yelling was being directed at an infantryman who had arrived late, but approximately fifteen minutes before I got there. It was the same guy I ran into in the hall. He, or rather _I,_ had apparently cracked his helmet during the impact. It made me wonder if Shinra was even _trying_ to protect their troops with those things. Obviously, no grunt is going to blame a second class for a mistake, so he just stood there obediently being reprimanded and taking deductions to his pay. So as not to contradict the words said in front of the infantry, I waited until the officer was done issuing punishments before pulling him aside to explain my part in the problem. Honestly, I doubt it helped.

I wanted to apologize to the infantryman for bumping into him earlier, but by that time, everyone was already shuffling into the armored cars we were taking to the mission. I wasn't even in the same car as him for the ride, and when we got there, I was asked to take point, and he stayed behind to join the second group because of some kind of stomach trouble. I didn't end up seeing him again that day. It wasn't until about a year later that I talked to him again, and I didn't even _realize_ it was him. I made first class after SOLDIER faced a mass desertion started by one of the old first classes; Genesis. I never really knew if they promoted me because of my skill or because they needed people. Angeal wasn't around to make me feel any better about it either because he deserted too, although I hadn't accepted that fact at the time. Despite this, I couldn't help but to appreciate my first real mission as a SOLDIER first class, even if it _did_ take me to the freezing mountains of Modeoheim. It was a stealth mission more than anything else. Far smaller than the one I had the previous year. It was just me, two infantrymen, and one of the special operations Turks named Tseng. Our ride crashed down on the mountain a ways out from our target, so we needed to walk for a while. This was fine by me, as I had kept myself in top shape and was a country boy by nature, but the others were having a hard time. At least two of them were.

To my surprise, the man matching me step for step was not Tseng, but one of the infantrymen who were accompanying us. When I asked him how he managed to keep up, he told me that he was a country boy too, from a place called Nibelheim. I just wanted to rub it in Tseng's face that he was being beaten by two country boys, so I asked the man what his name was. That's when he removed his helmet, and his blond hair fell into place.

"Cloud." He said, giving me a smile that contradicted the cold. I probably gave him my name too, which was kinda dumb I guess, since no grunt would've been on a mission with a first class without even knowing their name. I enjoyed those few minutes though. Laughing about backwater country towns and making fun of Tseng for falling behind. It was pretty nice. Little did I know that my first mission would become a full out confrontation with Angeal and Genesis himself.

After that day, Shinra became obviously paranoid about their SOLDIERs, especially the firsts. For months, I was mostly on an unofficial vacation, occasionally handed some joke of a mission so that the company could pretend that they still trusted me. It was not that I did anything wrong, but after the mass desertion, they didn't want to take any chances. I sometimes wondered if Sephiroth, the only other first class at the time, was going through the same thing. Needless to say, I never saw Cloud during that time. I barely even saw the Shinra building itself.

My vacation was cut not quite short enough, when I was suddenly under an unexpected attack at the resort town of Costa Del Sol. After fending of the attackers, I was informed by Tseng that copies of Genesis had been appearing all over the place. So all of a sudden, Shinra was in need of me again. Priority was focused on the town of Junon, as that was where we were keeping Hollander, a scientist we arrested for assisting Genesis in Modeoheim. Unfortunately, by the time I got there, the place had been overrun, and Hollander got away. I _did_ see Cloud that day, but he was rather busy being sick from the helicopter ride in, so we couldn't talk much. Instead, I asked him to dinner, but when we tried to make _that_ happen, we ended up with half a dozen unexpected tag-alongs who were too excited about being treated to dinner by a first to understand that it was supposed to be just the two of us. Cloud didn't talk much, as the other men were making more than enough noise as it was.

It was frustrating after time. Kind of like when you're trying to tell a story to someone, and they tell you they'll be right back, but then they get distracted and you never get to finish. Cloud was the only infantryman I actually knew, and even after a year I hadn't found the opportunity to apologize for knocking him over. It was almost like a mission to me at that point. However, missions once again became scarce after that day at Junon. Commander Lazard went missing at the same time as Hollander got away. Shinra had labeled him killed in action, but more then a few of us in SOLDIER had our suspicions that he too had deserted.

Genesis copies disappeared for the most part. Nobody knew whether to be relieved or anxious about that, but any investigations into the matter were led by the Turks, not SOLDIER. Shinra was becoming more and more reliant on the Turks, and more and more suspicious of us. It seemed that they wanted us to have absolutely nothing to do with the missions involving the deserters. A lot of focus seemed to be turned to the Mako energy reactors as well, but the company wouldn't let anyone know why. They didn't even let _me_ know, even when I was assigned to provide additional protection to the reactor in Coral. Guard duty was never my thing, but at this point I was just itching to get out and do something. It hit me as I was preparing to leave with my squad; my first mission when I bumped into Cloud was at a reactor. I had been assigned to clean up some troops from Wutai that had attempted to take over the place. Modeoheim was a reactor mission as well. Other then the guards they stationed, Shinra didn't have that many infantrymen who were used to working at reactors. That was what made me detour from my van to thumb through the squad roster, and sure enough, there it was.

Strife, Cloud – Infantryman.


	2. A SOLDIER's Pastime Part 2

**Cloud**

I'd heard a lot from the others. About how it was never a good sign when you were given a mission you got to know nothing about. They always laughed about how infantrymen were dispensable, and if Shinra was sending you on a suicide mission, they didn't tell you about it, because they wanted you to go in like you planned on winning. I had always heard about how people in jobs like this, army jobs, would make jokes to cope with the pressure of 'kill or be killed'. That's fine, I guess, but sometimes it became awfully hard to tell when they _were _joking, especially when their good luck pat on the back felt like a goodbye.

Infantry was not the place for me. I always found guns to be kind of, well... crude, I guess, and the armor was a joke. The only way you could really survive in infantry gear was to not get hit, which I'd proven myself to be pretty good at. I'd been working in Shinra for a couple of years now, and had obviously survived. I had also been shipped off to missions in a number of other regions, and proved that I could preform well in just about any environment. Unfortunately, I also proved that I would get motion sick in just about any vehicle. The latter stopped me from ever receiving a promotion, so I could only make a name for myself within the ranks of infantrymen. As long as you're an infantryman, you're treated like an infantryman, no matter how much you've proven yourself.

Special treatment only ever came during mission assignments, and it wasn't always favorable. I had excelled in my previous missions at reactors, so I was selected for another mission at a reactor. These missions were definitely _not_ favorable. They were always dark and smelled strongly of the Mako they were processing into energy. They were also the hotspots for attacks from anti-Shinra terrorist groups who thought that the company was destroying the world by sucking all of it's Mako dry. Shinra tried to keep these terrorist views secret, but they were obviously out there, especially since some of the citizens felt the same way. It didn't really concern me. All that did was my mission, which happened to be at a reactor.

I stood in a line with the rest of the infantrymen as our captain called our names for the headcount. There were a lot more of us then there was on my last reactor mission; all of us lined up for something we knew nothing about. All we had been told was to pack supplies, so we were obviously staying there for a while. I heard my name, Cloud Strife, called by the captain, and I saluted in response as we were supposed to do. The headcount finished, and as we filed into the vehicles, I caught a glance of the first class that would be accompanying us. It was Zack Fair, a man with overgrown spiky black hair and a massive sword. I had worked on a mission with him before. He was nice, but it kind of made me nervous how much he would tease the head of the Turks. I guess they weren't as intimidating to a first class SOLDIER.

The armored vehicles took off, and we could hear the screeching of the metal doors opening as we left Midgar. As we drove, I had the same thought echoing through my mind; infantry was not the place for me. Seeing Zack only reminded me of that. He was an obvious choice for first class. He made advancing through the ranks look easy, going from third class to first in almost record time. I wanted to be able to advance through the ranks. I wanted to be able to wield a massive sword like that. I had actually never seen him use that sword though. On my previous mission with him, he had a different, smaller sword. If I was remembering correctly, his current sword used to belong to Angeal, a first class SOLDIER who was killed in action a while back.

It had been my dream to get into SOLDIER since I was a kid, and now I found myself stuck in a job that was supposed to be just a stepping stone. Why couldn't I advance? Then I felt my stomach churn a little. Oh right, that was why. I dug through the supplies I packed, and pulled out a cluster of journals held together by rubber bands and a pencil. I started writing in journals a while back because one of my squad mates said it might help take my mind off of being motion sick. It didn't help much, but it stuck, and I'd been writing ever since. I usually just wrote about my mission; what it was, _where_ it was, who was going, and later I'd write about how it went. I didn't know much about my mission this time, but that had never stopped me before.

_X day/X month/X year - Time: 8:36am,_

_ I'm currently on route to my mission to the reactor on Mt. Coral. Mission details haven't been _

_ given as of yet. I counted about twenty infantrymen assigned on this mission, including myself. _

_ We're also being accompanied by two captains, one for each squad of ten, and one SOLDIER _

_ first class: Zack Fair._

_ Got about six or seven hours of sleep last night. The infantry are antsy because we don't know _

_ what we're dealing with yet. Hopefully, Zack will inform us upon arrival at the reactor. I hope _

_ it's nothing too bad, because I know a few of the men here myself. Regardless of what it is, give _

_ it more than your best, and maybe you'll see a promotion._

That last part finished almost all of my journal entries. A while ago, I had the same captain for three missions in a row. He was impressed with me on the first two missions. On the third, that was what he said to me; give it more than your best, and maybe you'll see a promotion. That gave me a lot more hope than I had at the time. He died on that mission.

When we arrived, we had a welcoming party waiting for us. Apparently, a number of troops had already been stationed there to guard the place, but the numbers seemed a bit larger than usual. The captain of the party wasted no words on us, and went straight to talking in private with Zack. This was fine by me, because it's a little difficult to stand at attention when your stomach feels like it's starting to do back flips. All I did was sit at the back of the vehicle we drove in on. The doors were open, so I just let my feet hang to the ground outside and peered up from time to time to watch the other guys waiting. That was all we could really do right then. Usually, we'd have some idea of where to go or what to do when we arrived at site, but as of then, we had nothing.

After a few minutes, Zack started to make his way back over to us. He looked laid back, but you could tell that he was formulating his words as he approached. The infantrymen formed a somewhat sloppy line in anticipation for what Zack had to say. Reluctantly, I joined them. I was interested to find out what our mission was.

"You were all told ahead of time to pack supplies for today's mission." Zack started, still watching the ground as he approached. He turned his gaze up to us, and all our eyes locked onto his. The Mako infused eyes were a trademark of a SOLDIER. He gave a long stare, and then his look got more serious, "As you've all probably figured out, that means we're gonna be here for a while. They've already got camps set up for us here. Our mission," he paused, "is to guard this reactor with all we've got. I know you all want to know more than that, but all I can tell you is that they're working on something important in there, and it's top priority to keep terrorists and Wutai assailants out. Until trouble, we're mostly on standby. All of you should report to your captains for your assignments."

We broke our line and joined our teams of ten to get our orders from the captains. On my way, I felt a hand against my shoulder.

"That's all he's gonna give us, huh?" It was Dallert, one of the infantrymen I had been on a mission or two with. He was a bit taller then most of the other guys, but he was friendly, and he was one of the people who _remained_ friendly with me between missions.

"Guess so." I said, still wishing I knew more myself.

"How's the stomach?" He gave me a few pats on the back.

"Not great," I answered. The pats didn't help, but I decided not to tell him that, "Holding up."

"Well, maybe you'll be one of the lucky ones who doesn't get any work 'till later." We both hushed up as we stepped into a line in front of our captain. As he handed out the orders, it turned out that both scenarios were true. I _was_ one of the firsts to go out on duty, but the captain gave everyone a few hours to go unpack at camp. That meant that they really _didn't_ have any pressing need for us to be there, and that made me wonder what exactly they were expecting, and what _we_ should be expecting. It was strange to have a SOLDIER first class simply to be on standby.

When I made it to camp, it was a bit less camp-like than I thought it would be. There were no tents set up, but rather four Shinra mobile homes, most likely flown in by plane, and several metal storage crates full of supplies. The homes weren't anything special. They resembled trailers, except larger and metal. Inside, there were five rooms, a bathroom, and a small kitchen. I found the room with my name on it and threw down my bag inside. At least there were enough rooms that we didn't have to have bunk mates. Even all that made me feel strange about my mission. I decided, however, that it didn't make any sense to worry about it when there was nothing I could do, especially since my first assignment was just guard duty. Besides, with Zack there, it wasn't likely that things could go _too_ wrong. All I could do was wait and see.


	3. A SOLDIER's Pastime Part 3

**Zack**

I wanted the others to think that I knew everything about what was going on. I wanted them to think that I would tell them what they needed to know as it came, and that I knew that everything would be dandy. I wanted this, but it was far from the truth. I wasn't sure whether this mission was really as top secret as it seemed, or if I had just been kept out of the loop because of the company's ever growing paranoia about my particular title. I had even come to the idea that maybe every single man in my unit had some idea of what was going on, and there had been a memo about keeping everything about everything from the SOLDIERs and just letting them risk there lives and do all the muscle work. A certain head of the science department back at the Shinra building let me know that that had been the general opinion of us. SOLDIERs were not for thinking, just brute work. Of course, coming from his mouth, the general opinion could have simply been just his.

I was a bit more convinced that it was a unanimous 'being left out of the loop' once I talked to the officer on duty and he gave me an answer as unsure as I was. Despite any possible memo, I was pretty sure that none of the officers would lie to me in a one on one conversation. Of course, that didn't make me feel any better. It only meant that everyone really _didn't_ know what was going on. At least that made it less likely for our enemies to gain any intelligence, but that also meant that this would most likely be a boring mission.

I had spent a little while pacing in thought about all this. That little while gave the infantry some time to grab their assignments and unpack at the camp. I had seen Cloud earlier, but he looked a bit sick, so I figured I would give him some space. Now some time had gone by and I was bored and driving myself crazy over a lack of info, so it seemed to be the perfect time to go and recognize the fact that we were both on a mission together, yet again. I hauled the bag of supplies I had brought over my shoulder and moseyed off to the campsite.

My place at the camp was none too bad, I noticed as I strolled into the clearing full of trailers and supply crates. It was about half the size of the other mobile homes, but I had it to myself, unlike the infantry who had to share their place with four or five other men. I took a brief step inside to drop of my stuff, and it was okay in there too. It could of used a rug, maybe an extra light or two, and possibly even a television. I wasn't a big watcher of TV, but I occasionally liked to listen to it while I exercised. I had yet to have gone on a mission with a TV, however, and was seldom even lucky enough to get a working radio. I grew tired of the home after just a moment and stepped back outside, scanning the place for mobile home four, where Cloud was supposed to be bunking.

Approaching the door, I tried to come up with some sort of reason for being there, just in case one of the other guys greeted me. Coming up with nothing, I knocked anyway and waited. After waiting some more, I opened the door myself. There were some behavior rules you had to remind yourself of as a first class. One of those was to not wait too long for a grunt to do something for you. I'm sure one of the others was not to go out of your way to schmooze with infantrymen, but who's really keeping track. Once inside, there was clearly no one there, or at least there was no one _awake_. The doors inside, labeled by names, were in various states of being opened or closed. Cloud's was one of the closed ones. So I knocked. The door, ever so invitingly, creaked open to reveal that no one was in there either. I figured Cloud and the others must have been the first cabin assigned to go out.

With a sigh, I dropped down to sit on the bed in the room. I wasn't really thinking about whether this was rude or not. The bed was already made, and Clouds supplies were shelved and organized around the room. Not too bad for someone who had just arrived a few hours earlier. A stack of books on the table caught my eye. They looked like journals, probably personal. I considered how many unspoken rules there were against what I was thinking of doing. Journals just sitting out in the open were pretty tempting, and I had to admit that I'd read a few pages of things that people had just left around before. Those people weren't even acquaintances of mine though, never mind friends. Were me and Cloud friends? It didn't really matter anyway. I knew I was going to read them, so there was no point in arguing with myself over it. I moved over and took a seat at the desk, opening one of the journals to a random page.

_ X day/X month/X year_, the journal began. It appeared it was written over a year ago.

_Time: 11:47pm,_

_ My mission today didn't go too well. I received a few minor injuries, but the worst part was that _

_ the Wutai soldiers got away with our cargo, AND our car. Luckily, one of the guys held onto his _

_ radio and called a chopper for us, but they still made us walk over a mile to the pickup spot._

_ Couldn't they have flown in a bit closer? If that wasn't bad enough, most of us had to get _

_ screamed at by the commander before getting medical attention, and I was already feeling sick from the ride in. I was almost envious of the guys that got hurt enough to skip that part. It was _

_ all I could do to not throw up right there and then, but I knew that if I did, I'd have to sit _

_ through more screaming._

_ At least no demerits were issued, and the benefit of being an infantryman is that you blend into _

_ the crowd and the yelling isn't usually directed solely at you... as long as you don't throw up. As _

_ a note, no promotion will come of today, but by tomorrow I can pretend like none of this ever_

_ happened._

It seemed a little awful, I thought, to be as amused by this as I was. Whether that awfulness was because of the screaming he endured, or because I was reading his personal entry about it, I did not know. I flipped a few more pages and decided on another journal entry I wanted to read.

_X day/X month/X year – Time: 6:45pm,_

_ No missions assigned today, although they might have been preferable to what I had to deal _

_ with. My mom called some time after 3:00pm today, and as much as I like talking to her while I _

_ can, fighting off a conversation about my lack of a relationship while on a phone connected to a _

_ room full of my laughing peers is sort of like a nightmare. I think it comes up second to being _

_ trampled by a bunch of frenzied chocobos. I think army men are worse than teenage girls about _

_ relationship gossip._

_ Anyway, I am very homesick when I think about it, so there was still something nice about that _

_ phone call. If only I were to have more than a day off at a time and some very convenient _

_ transportation, I would like to go back and visit. Who am I kidding though? I don't have the _

_ money for that, we aren't even given any real time off, and I wouldn't really want to go back and _

_ deal with certain people just yet..._

_ Oh well. No use in over thinking it. I believe I'll go to bed early tonight so that I'll be extra _

_ ready for tomorrow's tasks. Give it more than your best, and maybe you'll see a promotion._

Enjoying the journal more than I should have been, I started flipping the pages again, looking for words or sentences that caught my interest. I noticed the words '_Zack Fair_', and I stopped short. Leave it to an egomaniac like me to be more interested in my name than anything else. However, when I began to read, I heard someone messing with the door to the mobile home, so I sprang to my feet and fled the room, slowly easing the door shut behind me. I made sure I was a good seven feet from Cloud's door by the time the infantrymen poured in. All five of the men arrived at once, stepping through the doorway one at a time. A few of them were laughing, but they all fell silent as soon as they saw me standing in their hall. Cloud came in last, removing his helmet before noticing me.

"Uh, hey!" I gave them a wide wave of my hand, "Good timing! I just finished the surprise inspection." As unlikely as it was for a SOLDIER to be preforming surprise inspections, I knew none of them would question me, "Everything checks out, nice and tidy! Keep up the good work, guys." They all stayed silent as I marched out of the home, wearing my most convincing smile. Now would not be the time to greet Cloud, I supposed. I caught a glimpse of some of the confused looks exchanged by the infantry standing in front of one of the open doors, the inside clearly displaying a heap of supplies simply dumped from their bag.

Well, I supposed I was most likely going to be at that campsite for a while, and so was Cloud. There was really no rush to talk to him. I still had a hope that I might learn more about my mission soon, but I figured that for now, I'd have to take it as a victory that I learned more about Cloud. And hey, at least I managed to pass some time.


	4. A SOLDIER's Pastime Part 4

**Cloud**

Zack Fair didn't strike me as the type to perform inspections. I didn't believe that I had ever known a SOLDIER first class who might spend their time passing judgment on other peoples' socks. However, he _had_ been there. It seemed strange that he was sent on a mission with nothing to do, but I wasn't about to start complaining. First off, I hadn't been on a mission with a high ranking SOLDIER for a while now. Secondly, when we found him in our home, he didn't have anything to reprimand us about, which was a rare thing when it came to our superior officers.

Regardless of Zack's approval, our mobile home was rather messy. There was a sort of rushed organization to my room, but most of the men had simply dumped their bags or hadn't unpacked at all. They figured they'd organize when we returned from our first assignment. That's usually what we'd do, but that was only because we'd usually have some left over adrenaline when we returned. Instead, we were all assigned short-lived guard duty hours, and the majority of us were about ready to fall asleep by the time we'd gotten back. Some of us _did_ go to sleep after making sure that Zack was gone, and the rest of us occupied the scattered fold chairs around the room.

"That was odd, huh?" Said a man I hadn't yet learned the name of, as he tossed darts against a hand drawn target he taped to the wall a moment earlier.

"Yeah it was." Dallert replied, dropping down into the chair directly across from me. I had chosen a chair next to the window, partially because it was one of the only windows in the entire place, and it smelled like hot metal inside, and partially because it was by the only table. I had a thought or two about writing again in my journal, which now sat open in front of me, waiting for the pencil in my hand to start moving. After adjusting himself in the chair, Dallert continued, "Zack's a little odd anyway. I guess you have to be a little odd to be a SOLDIER."

"I guess so." Said the man I hadn't yet learned the name of. I considered this for a moment or two. I wondered if they'd promote me if I were a bit more odd. How did one go about being a bit more odd in the infantry? As far as I had witnessed, if you managed something crazy and out of the ordinary on the battlefield and still kept your head, you were most likely to lose it to your superior afterward. There must have been some kind of line in between. Some rare opportunity during which a little bit of craziness might impress one of the higher Shinra staff who just happened to be there to see it. Maybe a Turk, or maybe even the President. Then, there would be no way that any superior could yell at you for it. My pencil touched down on my journal as I daydreamed about a recommendation to SOLDIER. Something embarrassed inside of me kept me from writing about it in front of Dallert, and I turned my pencil over, rubbing the eraser against the small mark I had made.

"Do you think Zack knows what's going on here?" I asked, turning my eyes up from my paper.

"Hell yeah, he knows." Dallert shook his head like the question was stupid, "I don't know a first class who would go blindly into a mission." The man I hadn't yet learned the name of gave a shrug, just missing the bull's-eye. I wasn't sure that was entirely true. The way I figured it, if Shinra had a mission they needed someone to go blindly into, the first classes would be their first choice. That must be difficult. That must be a whole lot more exciting than what I was currently doing.

"Well... I hope we get filled in pretty soon." I said, deciding not to challenge Dallert's statement. He just nodded without looking at me, and for a few minutes, the room went silent. It was one of those silences that happened when everyone was just thinking to themselves. Turning one train of thought into another, and sorting things out in their brains. I did a lot of thinking like that. Usually, I would appreciate my opinion about something a lot more than anyone else would, so I found little reason to share my thoughts. Everyone thought something different about everything, and I guess I just thought that that was their own business. I didn't usually like it when someone would try and force their opinions on me, so I tried to avoid doing that myself.

"You still trying to get into SOLDIER?" Dallert asked after a moment. I supposed that was where his train of thought had led him, however, I did not appreciate it. That was one of the problems with having a fellow infantryman you socialized with; you end up sharing things with him. I had told him before that getting into SOLDIER was the whole reason I had joined Shinra in the first place. A lot of people just joined because they lived in bad conditions in Midgar, and the job would help them out a bit. Dallert knew I was still trying. I supposed he was just trying to make small talk. It wasn't his fault, but I didn't appreciate the subject.

"Yeah..." I said, my tone making it obvious that I didn't feel like talking about it.

"Hmmm." He responded, taking note of my displeasure, "Well I just wanted to say that the best time to make an impression is when you're on a mission with a first." He paused again, "Even when it's a dull old mission like this. You never know what might happen."

I stayed silent, but I appreciated the gesture. I really _didn't_ have any clue what might happen, so I had to make sure not to let the darkness we were being kept in get to me. I let down my pencil on the fold of the open journal, and picked up my rifle I had set down next to my chair. Having had no use, it wasn't in need of cleaning, so I just turned it over in my hands, checking the safety and the ammo. Honestly, my hands just needed something to do as I thought. I thought about all the things I hadn't told Dallert. About the little girl I used to hang out with back home around seven years ago. Tifa and I were best friends from an early age. I made her promises one night. Promises about being a SOLDIER. She was the reason I was so reluctant to go back home to Nibelheim, and also one of the biggest reasons why I wanted to. I set the gun down and leaned back in my chair, catching a glimpse of the sun out the window.

"We've got another assignment in a bit, right?" I said, still looking outside.

"Mmmhmm..." Replied the man I hadn't yet learned the name of.

"More guard duty." Dallert elaborated for me. I sighed, leaving a stain of breath fogged on the window. A few moments later, I picked up my pencil and began to write, leaning my head where I had just left my breath.

_ X day/X month/X year - Time: 12:16pm,_

_ Mobile home near Coral. I'm still just about as uninformed as I was before about my _

_ current mission. Zack told us that Shinra is working on something important inside the _

_ reactor, and that we need to guard it. The men seem to think that Zack knows what's _

_ going on, but I'm not that sure. He didn't look like he knew what was going on. Dallert says that this mission might be my opportunity to get a recommendation for SOLDIER. He thinks that impressing Zack might do the trick. For all I know, he could be right. Shinra only has a couple first classes nowadays, and the numbers of other SOLDIERs have been dwindling as well. I can only hope that that means they might be trying to find new guys. _

_ I need to get my motion sickness under control, because I think that's really holding me back. I don't really know what I'm supposed to do to impress someone while I'm on guard duty, but I'm sure that I can think of something. After all, they sent so many men over here that they must be expecting some kind of an attack. As frightening as that might be in our current lack of information, it would both be an opportunity for me, AND a welcome change of pace. I'll have to stay on my toes no matter how boring things get. No matter what happens, give it more than your best (and impress Zack), and maybe you'll see a promotion._

I laughed a little to myself at the last part. Impressing Zack didn't really seem too likely. I had once been on a mission that was just me and another guy, and Zack and Tseng. Even in such low numbers and in such close quarters to Zack, I couldn't manage to impress him much. I guessed that was largely affected by the fact that I had gotten wounded and lost my grip on one of the highest priority men on Shinra's list. Since I was still working for Shinra after that, it's obvious that Zack left my part out of his report, but he was definitely aware of it.

I stretched my arms, closed my journal and leaned back in my chair. Realizing how tired I had gotten listening to the sound of darts hitting the wall, I slowly rose to my feet and collected my things.

"I'm going to sleep for a while." I said in a tired voice, "If you let me sleep when it comes time for the next assignment, I'll kill you."

"If you were only so lucky to sleep through the next assignment!" Dallert laughed, louder than I would've liked in my tired state, "Don't worry. I'll wake you."

I gave a little wave of goodbye and gratitude and received a 'G'night' from the man I hadn't yet learned the name of. I hadn't yet gotten used to my room at the mobile home. I could have sworn that my journals were not quite where I had left them. However, one thing that I had learned to get into my mind as an infantryman was; a bed is a bed. The wheels in my head turned a bit longer as I contemplated how I might be impressive, but before I knew it, I was out cold. I was sure to feel a bit more refreshed before my next assignment.


	5. A SOLDIER's Pastime Part 5

**Zack**

** "**Thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-three..." Squats had become my only salvation after what seemed like a nice bit of time to settle into my shiny new locale turned into a few long hours of nothing to do but pace and tap my foot against the wall. I actually found myself _jealous_ of the guard duty hours assigned to the lower ranks. Oh, how far the mighty had fallen. A SOLDIER first class reduced to twiddling his thumbs... twiddling them _or_ using them to thumb through another guy's diary. I felt guilty about reading Cloud's personal writing, but at the same time I felt this itch at the back of my brain, just wondering and wondering about why and when my name was mentioned. "Fifty-nine, sixty, sixty-one..." I mean, right then I felt guilty. I _should_ have felt guilty. I was nosing through another guy's items while he was out. I was basically a thief, but as of then, I was an _unaccomplished_ thief. Would I really have felt any _more_ guilty if I had read on? At least then I'd have been freed of that curiousness.

"Seventy-five..." It was decided, I would wait for the troops at mobile-home four to head out on duty, and then I'd infiltrate and satisfy my curiosity. This would DEFFINATELY be the last time. I halted my squats on eighty-two and flipped open the roster I had left on my table after reading it through out of boredom earlier on. The work hours of each infantryman were detailed beside or under their names on the sheet. That would have been nice to notice earlier, so that I wouldn't have stumbled onto Cloud's empty room and inviting journals, and I wouldn't have this guilt and crazy curiosity looming over me. However, what was done was done, and I supposed the same thing could be said for what was _going_ to be done. The roster said that Cloud and the guys would be out of house pretty soon, so all I had to do was stay on look out.

It wasn't long after I had taken my squats to a vantage point near the window, that a large-bodied infantry trooper threw open the door to mobile-home four and led his fellows out to guard duty. I couldn't tell which of the men was Cloud, as they were all in helmets, but all five of them were definitely leaving. I waited and rounded my squats off at one-hundred-fifty. I figured that was a good time to go, since I was getting tired anyway. On my way to the door, I stopped and threw myself down into the chair in my makeshift living room. Was I really doing this? Going through the journals when I hadn't known what they were was bad enough, but going back a second time? I thought that I had to be crazy, but I knew that if I didn't do it, I was most likely to pace around and do squats until my legs broke off. Then I'd _really_ never get another assignment.

"Oh, well..." I said aloud to myself, "I guess I'll just have to apologize for this too." Somehow that justified it a bit for me, and after a moment or so, I was up and out the door. The walk to the mobile home seemed to take forever as I tried to avoid getting the attention of any of the other guys that were out and about. I didn't know what I was so worried about. I doubted that there was anyone present who would question a first class about what he was doing, much less press the subject if he didn't feel like telling them. Perhaps it was a feeling that stretched back to being a second or third class under Angeal. I wondered whether Sephiroth ever felt nervous, sneaking about and doing things that he shouldn't be doing. The thought itself was almost enough to make me laugh out. I wasn't sure that Sephiroth was capable of being nervous. Was he ever even a SOLDIER third or second class?

"Mr. Fair!" I jumped as I was approached by a commander a few feet from the home. Calling someone by Mr. didn't flatter those guys. "Mr. Fair, I just wanted to let you know that our scouts spotted a handful of Wutai soldiers in the mountains. They've been dispatched, but there may be more."

"So I missed 'em?" I laughed, but received no change in expression from the man I was talking to, "Uh, okay. Just let me know if more show up, huh?" The commander nodded and briskly ran off. I found myself just a little nervous that Wutai guys were showing up right around Cloud's shift, but I _had_ worked with the guy before, and he could handle himself alright, especially for an infantryman. The only thing that I was unsure of, was exactly what number of warriors we should be expecting if they _were_ to show up again. I still didn't know what Shinra was up to, so I had no clue how important it might have been to our enemies.

After the coast was clear, I focused myself back on task and headed into the mobile home. There were darts stuck into the wall around a crudely drawn target, and drink cans and ammo packs were scattered on the floor around the table. There was even a pair of socks tucked into the corner down the hall. It seemed that the passing inspection I gave the guys was the green light to go ahead and drop things everywhere. I didn't care, of course, but I did worry for them if a commander decided to preform an _actual_ inspection. Cloud's room was in the same condition it was before, except the bed looked unkempt and slept in. I made a quick swoop for one of the journals, forgetting exactly which one I had been reading before, and took a seat on the blankets. The bed was warm underneath me, so I opted to switch to the seat by the table, not wanting to be reminded that this wasn't my room and my stuff. I stared the journal down for a moment, and finally flipped it open to a page around the middle.

_X day/X month/X year – Time: 3:30pm_

_ Mission: stopping a riot at the train station. There was a man earlier on today who threatened a Shinra employee not to get on the same train as him, saying that he was killing the planet by working for the company. When the employee got on the train anyway, a fist fight ensued... or the man punch the employee a few times, anyway. It turns out that that man wasn't the only Shinra hater on that train, and when the peacekeepers showed up, a riot broke out over "Shinra favoritism". Naturally, we were sent in to break it up. Nobody was hurt bad, although I think the employee may have had a broken nose. We're required to stick around for a while to make sure that things go smoothly, and I'm on my break. I wonder why so many people hate Shinra? They just supply cheap energy to places that need it, right? I think that the terrorist groups have just got people worked up. I guess when you present two sides, someones always gonna choice both of those sides eventually._

The entry ended there. I started flipping through the book, searching for the reason I had come there. There were a few lines that caught my sight, amusing me as I skimmed the pages.

..._One of the guys told me that I'd make a good farm boy, and that I should try keeping chocobos. Then the rest of them started talking about me as the little blond farm boy. I'm seriously starting to consider dyeing my hair..._

I had been a farm boy myself once, so I laughed. I hoped that Cloud would never change his hair color, because then I couldn't talk about him as the little blond infantryman.

_...said it would be nice if we could get a vacation at Costa Del Sol, but I honestly think that I'd burn up like toast in the sun. If I could get a week off, I'd just like to visit a nice cool place like back home at Nibelheim..._

I started to wonder exactly how long it'd been since he last visited his home. I remembered him talking about his mom in another entry. I noticed my name a few pages later. The date seemed to be shortly after the mission during which I had last seen Angeal.

_ X day/X month/X year – Time: 6:44pm_

_ Stationed at a camp near Rocket Town. It's snowing today, and we've had no sign of any more Wutai soldiers. The cold just reminds me of my mission to Modeoheim. I wish that Zack were here for this mission too. If he was, he'd have us search the area for the Wutai stragglers and be done with it, not just hang around and wait for them to show up. Everyone here knows they're not coming back. There's too few of them, and they don't work well in the cold. I guess Wutai is a warmer climate. They're not going to scale the mountain today, that's for sure. Anyway, we have our orders, so give it more than your best, and maybe you'll see a promotion._

It seemed that a lot of the entries ended that way. I wondered exactly what Cloud really wanted to be. I flipped the pages back a bit, searching for an entry around Modeoheim. My name caught my eye again.

_X day/X month/X year – Time: 2:34pm_

_ No missions scheduled for me today. That's good because my arm still hurts from yesterday. I feel like I actually enjoyed the helicopter ride into Modeoheim that crashed better than the one home. I was tired and I got terribly sick. I'm pretty sure I managed to hide that from Zack though. Working with him was great. He took out the monsters there like they were nothing. The soldiers too. Better not get on his bad side. You'd think that that would be enough incentive for people to stop defecting from Shinra, but I guess that being on a first class's side always makes you feel powerful, even if they are going against the rest of the company. Working so close to Zack and Tseng was pretty intense. Zack actually talked to me on the walk to the reactor. He was talking like there was nothing to keep an eye out for, and actually making fun of Tseng. I want to be like that. Fearless. Heck, I was nervous enough just talking to him. Can't talk to Tseng. He's pretty silent most of the time, and straightforward the rest. I think the Turks are trained that way. I would hope that the experience at Modeoheim looks good on my record. I mean, I was actually in the same room as Genesis at one point. I guess Zack managed to beat him. That would've been something to see, but I was too busy losing my grasp on Hollander and getting my arm thrown out. I'll have to wait and see what becomes of that._

Modeoheim brought back memories of things I didn't like to think about. Angeal's death didn't sit well with me, but as far as the infantry were concerned, he was reported to be killed in action a few months earlier. It was interesting to read about the event through someone else's eyes. I realized that I should be done reading, but instead I continued to search the pages. The journal often mentioned a girl named Tifa living back in Nibelheim. I wondered if she was Cloud's girlfriend, but he _did_ write about his mother asking about his lack of relationships. What was the date on that one, I wondered. I started a search for his mother in the journal, and before I knew it, I was stopping to read a line here, and a page there, until I forgot what I was even searching for. I thought about how it was funny just how enjoyable someone's journal could be to another.

Every time I saw Tifa written there, I started to think about Aerith. Aerith was a good friend of mine back in Midgar. A lot of people in Shinra took note and started calling her my girlfriend. I supposed she was. I _did_ still owe her a date after all. I started thinking about how me and Aerith met. I came crashing down through her roof from the upper plate, well... the church's roof, anyway. I was saved by the bed of flowers Aerith had planted inside. When I woke up, I thought I had died. There she was, pretty and glowing, and I was laying in the most flowers I had ever seen in one place in Midgar. I didn't think it could have been real, and I especially didn't think it could have been the slums. I promised Aerith one date for saving me. We talked, and we realized a dream for her; fill Midgar with flowers.

I started to miss Aerith as I turned through the pages in the journal, now a bit slower than before. My mind got lost in thought. So lost in fact, that I didn't notice the time going by, and I didn't notice the sounds of five infantrymen shuffling back inside after their assignment was over. My mind only clicked back into focus just as I heard the door behind me creak open. The look on Cloud's face was a strange one. It was vacant or processing. He had frozen in a position just after removing his helmet, his eyes just flicking around the scene, like he was having a dream or watching television and he didn't know whether he was supposed to react. Then, he stiffened, tightened his grip on the helmet and stood straight like an infantryman was supposed to do.

"S-sir." He said, at attention. His eyes, no longer on me, drifted to the open journal by my hands, "Were you...?"

"I came to apologize." I grasped for a reason and stood up from the chair.

"Sir... for reading my journal?" He asked, all the confusion in his voice that I should expect. I hadn't thought much about that circumstance, but I figured that it would be kind of an awkward time to apologize for knocking him down in the hall.

"Uh, yeah. And you don't have to call me sir." I said, feeling very much unlike a superior. Maybe he got the same feeling because he loosened up a bit.

"It's okay." He said, and I shouldn't have expected him to say anything else, but it made me feel a little better none the less. He set his helmet down on his nightstand, and took a seat on the bed, as I was standing in front of the only chair. He still looked a little nervous as I sat back down by his desk, "You didn't read too much, did you?" I didn't know how to answer that question. I had read a lot, but I thought it'd make him feel better if I said that I didn't.

"No, not much." I said, closing the book, "Sorry." I couldn't help but to apologize again, "I actually came here to say hi." I let Cloud settle down for a moment. It wasn't everyday you'd find a first class in your room, "We're on the same mission again, huh?"

"Looks like it." Cloud said, smiling at the floor and giving a sort of quiet, bemused laugh. It looked like I probably wouldn't get him to calm down and chat with me right then. He'd probably lost half of his life just being surprised by me in there. After a moment of silence, I stood up, winning his gaze.

"Hey, I'm gonna let you rest, but it'd be nice to catch up sometime."

"Okay." He nodded at me. Without another word, I left his room and made my way out of the home. The other men froze when they saw me, and stared in confusion. The only motion in the room other than myself, was one of the men's feet pushing a sock on the floor out of my sight. Closing the door behind me as I left, I promised myself that I wouldn't let all that awkwardness happen again. It was time to go do some squats to clear my mind.

"One-hundred-fifty-one..."


	6. A SOLDIER's Pastime Part 6

**Cloud**

Guard duty again. It was now day two of my assignment to the Coral reactor, and I hadn't heard a single thing about what we were guarding, only that it was important. I had hoped that Zack would have more of an idea what was going on around here, but he was obviously as bored as me and the guys were. I had found him in my room in the mobile-home Shinra provided for us, reading my journals just to pass time. I didn't think I had _ever_ seen a SOLDIER first class lowered to such trivial pastimes. Of course, as boring as guard duty was, it was better than absolutely _no_ assignments, which was most likely what Zack Fair was facing. Still, it would've been nice to have someone to talk to. The only infantry stationed near me were guards who had already been here when we arrived a day prior, and the man I hadn't yet learned the name of, somewhere around the corner.

Speaking of people to talk to, I hadn't really used the opportunity to chat with Zack when I found him the home. To tell the truth, I had been wanting to talk to him again for a while now. Modeoheim was too long ago, and I hadn't really seen him since, except for during a brief dinner, but a few of the guys were there as well, and Dallert was chatting up a storm. I hadn't ever met a first class who was interested in socializing with me. I hadn't ever met a SOLDIER in general who was interested in socializing with me, and Zack was a nice guy, so it should have been something I took advantage of. It was none too easy for me to gain the courage to go up and try to chat with a SOLDIER, and when a first class came to my room and said that _they_ just wanted to chat, I froze up and said nothing. Of course, that may have been because I had found him reading my personal journals. I wasn't too sure that being a first class allowed you _those_ privileges, but I supposed it didn't really matter. I was just a bit worried that he might have read my thoughts on trying to impress him for a promotion. That really wasn't the only reason I wanted to talk with him. Whether he had read that or not, at that point it seemed like I'd have to make the next move to talk him.

I hadn't gotten a whole lot of sleep last night, as I had a whole lot on my mind, and for both the tiredness and the distracting thoughts, I couldn't wait for my guard duty to just end. I had one man standing close enough to me to be in ear shot, and I didn't even know that man, so it was doubtful that he wanted an ear full of nonsense. I didn't know why I hadn't just talked to Dallert before I had left that morning. After all, that was the _benefit_ to having a fellow infantryman you socialized with. I just stared and waited, erect in a pose meant for guard duty as the time slowly ticked by.

It wasn't until about ten minutes remaining in my shift that my humdrum stance was broken by the booming sound of an explosion nearby. After the initial shock, I readied my rifle and started running right to the source. I was joined by the other guard as we approached the burning mess on the side of the reactor's outer wall. A number of Wutai warriors surprised the guards on that side with a volley of fire, and were now making their way down off the mountains to the metal walkways we were guarding.

"Dammit!" I heard the guard next to me say, just before unleashing a round of bullets in the Wutai's direction. I steadied my gun to eye level and took aim at the nearest enemy. The trigger pulled under my finger almost as if on its own, and a flurry of bullets shot down a warrior in midair as he jumped from rock to metal. I had never bonded with my gun as much as the other guys had, but in a situation like this where adrenaline takes over and your life is on the line, it became my best friend. Or at least my best chance of survival. I shot off another round of bullets and took cover to reload. It was never like I _enjoyed_ shooting down my enemies. It just felt cheap, especially when they were wielding spears and halberds. At the same time, however, the idea of fighting hardened Wutai warriors in a melee fight was rather terrifying, even if I _was_ wielding a massive sword like Zack's.

I reared up from behind my cover to take aim on another Wutai who had made his way down to the reactor wall. Just as I was about to fire, a four legged Wutai trained monster leaped at me from a hill to my side. Desperate just to turn fast enough to guard myself, I staggered back and nearly lost my footing, leaving me open to attack. The monster never made it to me, however, as it was intercepted by Zack Fair's Buster Sword, and now laid motionless on the ground. Zack turned his head to me with a grin and a solute just before rushing onward into the fray, actually passing the infantry and going for the source of the warriors. Striking the Wutai troops down impressively, Zack was soon out of my sight. It wasn't long after that we heard the news that the enemies retreated. Rushing head on into battle with just a sword and a grin. That was who I wanted to be.

There were several injured infantrymen who had to be flown out for medical help, and four casualties from the battle. One of the previously stationed guards I didn't know, two scouts, and the man that I only then learned the name of. His name was Carter, and even though they didn't know each other for long, he was a friend of Dallert. Needless to say, Dallert was down after that. He returned to the home before the rest of us, and said nothing. I didn't go to the home immediately when my shift ended. Instead, I took a seat on the low rock wall near Zack's quarters. It was dusty... or sandy, I couldn't tell. I considered writing in my journal, but I was too shaken up by the sudden adrenaline, so instead I nursed my only injury, a sprained ankle, and just thought.

That could have been me out there. _I_ could have been the man that people hadn't yet learned the name of. That could have been _my_ name on the list of casualties. Sure, I was an experienced infantryman, probably more so than he was, but I heard that he didn't even get a chance to fight. I heard he had died in the explosion before he even knew what was happening. Sometimes that's just how it goes, but being so close to it just reminded me of how weak I really was in the grand scheme of things. Infantry was not the place for me. I felt my helmet, heavy on my head, and decided to take it off, letting it drop. It hit the ground with a thud, raising a small dust cloud by my feet.

As I sat thinking, I barely registered Zack as he approached. He clutched my shoulder as I watched his feet step into my view of the ground.

"Hey." He said, dropping down to sit next to me. He sounded tired as well, "How are you holding up?"

"Alright, I guess," I said, still not looking up from the ground. I actually missed Zack's hand as it pulled away. Any bit of comforting was welcomed. "A couple of guys died out there." There was a pause, and then Zack leaned back against the rock, tilting his head back with him.

"I know..." He said in a drearier tone than I was used to hearing from him, "Did you know them?"

"Not really." I leaned back as well, and considered what I was going to say next, "What's going on here? What are we protecting?" Zack's head turned to face me, still tilted back. My eyes locked on his, and it was almost exhilarating just to be this close to a first, never mind questioning him.

"I don't know." He raised his arms back as though he was going to place them behind his head, but then he propelled himself forward to hunch over and rest his arms on his knees. He looked frustrated as well. "I'm sorry. I know people died and I'm sure you want answers, but they haven't even told _me_ what's going on here." I could tell that he wasn't lying, but that didn't make me feel any better.

"Where do they get off not telling _you_ what's going on?" I said a little louder than before, "Aren't you the one in command here?" I stopped myself, realizing that I was way out of line. Zack didn't even twitch at my raised voice and just continued to stare ahead.

"I don't know..." He said, obviously in the middle of a thought process, "I mean, I _do_ know. I'm in charge, but I guess that SOLDIER isn't exactly favored with secret information right now." I knew what he was talking about. There was no denying that the mass desertion of SOLDIERs had shaken things up in the company. It was probably the Turks that were dealing with the confidential stuff.

"I'm sorry." I said, turning my gaze back to the ground, "I shouldn't have gotten like that."

"Like what?" Zack said, sounding genuinely confused, "You have every right to be upset. Hey, I'd like to know more too."

"Yeah, I guess. Thanks." I stood up and brushed off the dust from my uniform. I found myself just about to compliment Zack, to tell him that he did great out there, because that's what _I_ would want to hear, but it would probably just sound stupid coming from an infantryman. Instead, I held out my hand for him to shake, "I'm heading back to the home. It was nice to see you again, sir." He took my hand and, instead of shaking it, used it to pull himself up into standing position. Had I not balanced myself, he would have pulled me down.

"It was nice to see you too." He smiled because he was too tired to grin, "Keep your spirits up, okay?" I nodded at him and returned to mobile-home four. The home was quiet, as everyone went straight to their rooms upon returning. Everyone except for Dallert, who sat at the table, fiddling with throwing darts. The home was one person short, and I could feel it. Dallert didn't even look up at me, but I sat down at the table beside him. I didn't say anything to him, but I put my hand on his shoulder. Because for me, any bit of comforting was welcomed. Dallert lowered the darts to the table and said nothing, but I could tell that he agreed.


	7. A SOLDIER's Pastime Part 7

**Zack**

Four men died during the attack on the reactor earlier that day. It had gone too far. It was one thing to keep everyone in the dark when all they had to do was stand around and wait, but there was no justification for putting everyone's lives on the line and not telling them why. The attack made by Wutai was greater and faster than I would have expected all the way out there at Coral. That meant that they were really trying to interfere with whatever Shinra was planning, and we had no idea what to expect. I'd had enough of it. I had felt just about ready to complain to the President himself when I was told that the Turks were being flown over to fill me in on a new mission. I didn't really know what to think about that. My mission here didn't exactly feel complete, whatever it was, unless Shinra was just trying to lure out a camp of assailants from the mountains. All I could do was wait and find out.

It was half-past three when the helicopter appeared in the sky above us. Dust flew everywhere as it landed by the camp. My footsteps muffled by the sound of the propeller powering down, I jogged up to meet Tseng as he stepped out.

"Hey, Tseng! How's it goin'?" I clapped my hand down on his shoulder. He didn't flinch at the clap, or even squint as the dust settled. Tseng was the spitting image of a Turk; tall, slender, always in a suit, and little to no variation in his expressions. His classic unreadable stare was exactly what I got in return to my greeting.

"As you probably know," Tseng continued with the same stare, "I'm here to fill you in on the details of what's going on inside the reactor, and to debrief you about your next mission."

"It's about time," I said, trying not to look too excited about getting a little info, "So, what's the news?"

"Walk with me." Tseng started walking before I could respond, so I followed. "Shinra's Weapons Development has been working on a top secret project to refine materia stones into a larger, more powerful state known as huge materia." The last bit caught my interest. I wasn't unaware of materia. They were powerful stones used to create certain effects, like producing fire, or healing an injury. They were probably what the Wutai warriors used to create the explosion earlier that day. I _hadn't_, however, heard of _huge_ materia. I figured that was what made it top secret. "That is what they've been working on inside. We were attempting to keep it a close guarded secret, so that Wutai wouldn't learn about it, but it appears that we had a spy in the science department."

"Huh..." I considered his story so far, "So where do I come in? Finding the spy sounds like more of a job for you guys, doesn't it?" He gave me a stare before continuing.

"Now that Wutai knows about the huge materia, we are no longer attempting to hide it." He stopped, apparently convinced that we were far enough from other ears, and turned to face me, "Instead, we are going to try and lure them out."

"What? And use all these men here as part of the bait for some huge attack?" I protested, raising my voice and getting no reaction out of Tseng.

"No." He responded, as calm and cool as ever, "We can't risk any more explosions at the reactor. The plan is for Shinra to fly a fake huge materia to another location nearby. It will go on display inside battle square in Gold Saucer, and you will stay nearby to act on any attempts to steal it."

"Gold Saucer?" I said, even louder than before, actually causing Tseng to look over his shoulder and make sure that no one was listening, "That's the amusement park, right? There's thousands of people there!"

"We know what were doing. Despite being Shinra owned, the majority of the people there are civilians, so it's doubtful that Wutai would make a full on assault. Even if they wanted to, Gold Saucer is surrounded on all sides by a dessert and, for the most part, suspended above ground level. All tourists and staff are required to take a gondola to get in." Tseng paused when he realized that I had settled down, "The targets you will be after are high level Wutai officers who are using Gold Saucer as a local point of communication. They wouldn't normally be acting on their own, for fear of exposure, but we believe that this huge materia will be enough to lure them out of hiding."

"Alright." I said after a moment, "Sounds good, I guess. I could definitely use a little more action."

"Good." Tseng said, pointedly, "You will be leaving immediately. Please pack up and meet me back here."

"Great!" I said, no longer hiding my excitement. I turned to run back to my mobile-home and froze with a thought in my mind, "Hey, Tseng?" I turned myself back around to meet the same stare as before, "Can I bring one of the men here along with me?" His brow furrowed ever so slightly.

"You _do _realize that this is still top secret to under-ranking Shinra employees, don't you?"

"Sure." I nodded at him, not entirely convincing, "But this guy is good. He was with us during Modeoheim." The mention of the place made Tseng consider. I could only tell this because it took him a moment to respond.

"Very well. But you are responsible for him." It was a brief but serious statement. What Tseng meant was that if he died or was responsible for the enemy getting away, I would be in big trouble. Sadly, I would get in more trouble for the latter. After taking in his warning approval, I turned on my heel and ran back to my mobile home. When I was almost there, I noticed Cloud treading on up to the reactor and changed course to head in his direction. Just the infantryman I was looking for.

"Hey!" I said, getting his attention and causing him to turn and stand straight to face me, "Where are you off to?"

"They've got me back on guard duty now, sir." Cloud responded, "Shifts are more frequent right now because we're down a few men."

"First off," I placed my hands on my hips, "Stop calling me sir, okay? It's Zack." I gave a grin and evoked a small smile from him, "Secondly, guard duty is over. How would you like to come to Gold Saucer?"

It took less than ten minutes for me to pack up my stuff from the mobile-home. I had barely unpacked, leaving even my spare uniform stuffed away in a bag. I probably should have changed into it, as the one I was wearing had gotten a bit dusty, but it had never occurred to me. I had to wait a bit longer for Cloud to finish packing his stuff up. He seemed pretty excited to go, or at least as excited as _I've_ seen him, and who wouldn't be if they were told that they could stop playing guard and go to an amusement park? He emerged from the home after I'd waited about ten minutes, and we immediately started walking across the field to meet Tseng.

"Need any help carrying that?" I gestured to Cloud's luggage, and he shook his head.

"I've got it," He said, "Why are we going to Gold Saucer, si-Zack?"

"I'll explain on the way." I grinned at him as we walked, "Don't worry, it'll be fun." I didn't think that he was worried. Tseng's eyes followed Cloud as we approached, and then slowly turned to me. I couldn't quite tell what message he was trying to send, but it was probably along the lines of: are you sure? I didn't bother trying to eye-message him back, "We're ready." I said as we stopped in front of him.

"Follow me then." Tseng began to walk down the mountain path, away from the reactor. As we followed, he filled Cloud in on the details of the mission. I was surprised by that. I figured that since he said that Cloud was my responsibility, I would probably have to fill him in myself. Cloud looked uneasy talking to Tseng the entire way down, and mostly responded in nods or vague noises. Once the explanation stopped and we'd had a few minutes of silence, Tseng gave me another look, and I just smiled at him. A few minutes later, we arrived at a small gondola station just behind the village of Coral.

"Here we are!" I said, tossing my bags aboard the gondola as Tseng flashed a badge at the operator. Another man took Cloud's bags and loaded them on. Both myself and Cloud climbed inside, and Tseng came up to stand outside by the door.

"Remember," Tseng said, getting both of our attentions, "The targets will be under cover, so they won't look like your average warrior. When they take the bait, follow them and make sure to apprehend them _all_."

"Will do." I confirmed, "And... since it's an amusement park..." Tseng's shoulders dropped in an exhale, and he shut his eyes.

"The company will cover any expenses during your trip..." He opened his eyes and looked a little less serious for once, "Have fun."

The gondola started up, and followed a thirty degree incline, raising us up off the ground toward the park. Cloud sighed back into his seat.

"Thanks for bringing me along, Zack." He said after a moment.

"No problem." I assured him with another smile, "I couldn't really enjoy this place all on my own, could I?" Cloud just made an amused noise, but I took it to mean that he agreed. We stayed silent after that, as the gondola brought us higher and higher into the air. I just relaxed with the sway of our ride until a single red balloon floated past the window, breaking both of our dazes. Staring outside, we could see a grand gold structure, towering high as we approached. Many different lights and sounds came before us and more balloons started welcoming us upon our arrival. Here we were at last.

The Gold Saucer.


	8. A SOLDIER's Innocence Part 1

**Chapter Two: A SOLDIER's Innocence

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**

**Cloud**

_X Day/X month/X year – Time: 5:47pm_

_ My mission at Coral reactor ended suddenly today when Zack Fair approached me and invited me to join him on a mission to Gold Saucer. I'm the __only person who came along with him. Our mission is to lure out under cover Wutai hostiles in the area using something called a huge materia. Sounds like we may have to wait it out a bit before they make their move. Tseng debriefed us earlier, and he said __that Shinra is paying for all expenses during the trip. Usually, that wouldn't affect me much, but Gold Saucer is an amusement park, and it sounds like Zack is planning on having some fun._

I placed down my pencil, thinking about SOLDIERs on play days. It really _was_ very impressive there. I'd never seen anything like the view we got just pulling into the station. It was almost enough to make me forget about how my stomach was churning by the time we got there. I tried to hide that fact from Zack, but inevitably he noticed. So alas, I was now sitting alone in the hotel room that the staff had prepared for us. When we had first arrived, it seemed like the hotel manager was ignoring me, and when I followed him up to the room with Zack, he gave me a long stare and finally apologized, saying that he had expected only one person. So because of that, we only had one room. Luckily, there were two beds, because it would have been unfortunate if I had to sleep on the couch the whole time here. I would have put up with it though, since even _being_ here seemed like a treat.

I closed up my journal, most likely to finish it later, and pulled my leg up to the side of the bed I was sitting on to unlace my boots. Zack had gone out a while ago, flashing me some Shinra credit card I didn't even know existed. He was going to pick us up some new clothes so that we didn't stick out like a sore thumb. That would be my first mission where I wasn't in uniform, and the first time I would see Zack out of uniform. I got a rather surreal feeling, sitting there and waiting for Zack to return. That didn't feel like being an infantryman. It was almost like a dream. Of course, if it had turned out to _be_ a dream and I had woken up to another day of guard duty at the Coral reactor, I think that I really _would_ have been sick right there and then. As of then, however, I was feeling much better and a lot faster than that usually happened. I let my shoes drop and pulled myself up entirely onto the bed, resting my back against the wall. I didn't even notice as I let myself drift off and close my eyes. I wasn't sure if I actually fell asleep, but it felt like Zack woke me when he opened the door to the room and my eyes flicked open.

"Got you some stuff." He said, tossing a shopping bag my direction. I fumbled trying to catch it in my just woken state, and it landed half in my arms and half on the bed, "I hope it fits you." Zack continued, going through his own bag. I pulled a navy blue turtleneck out of the bag. It was just about the same color as my uniform but a little darker, and I wondered if Zack was just used to seeing me in that color. Honestly, blue was usually a good color on me, so I didn't mind. In the bag there was also a set of dark blue pants and black ones, as well as a pair of brown shoes. "I figure you brought everything else with you." Zack said, nodding towards my luggage, "You oughta unpack. We might be here a few days."

"Yeah. Thanks for the clothes," I got off the bed and started to fiddle with my bag.

"Hey, no problem." Zack shrugged, standing with his new clothes in his hands, "It was on Shinra." I unpacked a few things and looked up to address Zack again, but he had disappeared into the bathroom with his clothes. I got up and brought my stack of journals to the nightstand by my bed, and then took advantage of the opportunity to change into my own outfit. I stripped and dressed quickly so I would be done before Zack, and when he came out, I was folding my uniform on the bed. Zack was now wearing a turtleneck as well, but it was black like his first class uniform, and he was in dark jeans. "How do I look?" He threw his hands out to either side to display himself.

"You'll blend right in." I answered, but I couldn't stop thinking about how the dark colors only exaggerated the Mako in his eyes. I supposed that the under covers were most likely not going to be staring Zack in the face in such a crowded park. I finished folding my clothes and once again took a seat on the bed. "When do you think we should be ready for the attack?" I asked after a moment of thought.

"Well, I don't think that they're planning on attacking anything." Zack cocked his head in consideration, "And like I said, could be as long as a few days. The huge materia hasn't even gotten here yet."

"Oh." I turned my gaze to the floor. I was feeling a nervous anticipation of a confrontation that could be a few days off. I figured that I must have still been shaken up from the ride in. "Do you think that we should really say huge materia?" I didn't know why I asked him that even then. As a first class, he definitely knew what he was doing, but as usual, he responded as though there was nothing stupid about the question at all.

"I wouldn't worry about it. I doubt that they're listening in on us." He was right. We were under cover after all, so there was no reason that anyone would suspect us. I wasn't used to this type of mission, but I knew that I had to just calm myself down and have some fun like Zack was. I took a look around the room. The hotels here were fancier than any I had ever been to. Our room had a big TV across from the beds and a menu for room service on the nightstand. I secretly hoped that Zack would order some food at one point, because I wasn't sure that the all expenses paid were supposed to extend to me. I was startled when Zack's phone began to ring. He flung it open and leaned against the wall by the window.

"Hey." Zack greeted whoever was on the other side and then paused, "Oh, great." He continued, "Yeah, that's in a half-hour, right?" I watched a gondola pass by a distance outside the window. Zack continued to talk, and I stood up to take a closer look. I could see a number of lights and signs marking attractions down below. It looked like there were rides as well as other things. Zack clicked his phone shut and turned to look at me. "Tseng says that the materia's here, and that some Gold Saucer big shot is going to open the museum at six-thirty to show it off. We should be there."

"Alright." I said nonchalantly, although I was actually itching to get out of the room and take a look around. Zack was flipping his phone open and then shut, over and over as he stared out the window, apparently admiring the same view that I had been. I felt like I should say something to him. It was not every day that a first class SOLDIER would bring a grunt along with him on an important mission. I didn't want to appear ungrateful, but I just felt so out of place that I didn't really _know_ what to say or how to act. It was generally my first instinct to stay quiet in those situations, but I felt like I should really say _something_. I opened my mouth to speak, and realized that Zack had once again flipped his phone open, this time to sort through emails. I guessed that he really didn't notice any ungratefulness, so I walked back to my bag and continued to unpack. A few minutes later, I was putting away my uniform when Zack tapped my shoulder from behind.

"What'd'ya say we head out?"

Gold Saucer was a big place. It seemed even bigger when we were walking around than it had from any of the views. There were people all over, and the occasional mascot dressed like a fat chocobo. The mascots would run around saying things like 'Gold Saucer is fun!' and 'Let's go to Wonder Square!', and I could only _wonder_ about exactly how much they paid those guys. Anyway, it was fun to watch. After about ten minutes of walking, we came along a sign announcing that we were entering Battle Square. A list of current tournaments and prizes was pinned underneath with a sticker depicting a smiling monster.

"Looks like this is the place," Zack said, pulling out his cell phone, "And with ten minutes to spare!" The path into Battle Square took us up a steep set of stairs, carpeted in red and lined with blazing searchlights. Inside, the checkered floor was crowded with hyped up fighters, throwing punches at the air in anticipation, and with dressed up fans who came just to watch. I overheard a girl asking her boyfriend to fight and win her some Stardust.

"They really hold fighting tournaments in an amusement park?" I questioned, taking in how different this area was.

"Sure." Zack shrugged, "That's what some people call amusement. I hear it's pretty regulated, anyway." He turned to peruse a list of prizes displayed on the wall. "Actually sounds kind of fun."

"Please don't." I said, not liking the look in some of the fighters' eyes. Zack frowned at me in confusion and then threw his arms up, interlocking his fingers behind his head.

"You're right. We get enough fights day to day as it is." He grinned and gave me a little hit on the back, "Besides, we wouldn't want to show off all our skills and end up being found out, huh?" I smiled with him, but I knew that _my_ skills wouldn't stand out among this crowd. Just then, a voice boomed from a microphone across the room. We turned to see a buffed up man with slick black hair, throwing his arms open to get everyone's attention.

"Honored guests of Gold Saucer," He started, running his gaze over the room, "I am Dio! Founder and spokesperson of this glorious place! Gold Saucer may not yet have many years behind it, but inside you can find objects of great age and legacy. Behind me now, I will unveil yet another collection of ancient wonders and modern day marvels, in yet another reopening of the Battle Square Museum!" A curtain dropped behind the man, revealing a room full of quite a variety of items. "Our most prized item today," Dio started back up, "A new scientific marvel! Using only the most advanced refining techniques, the Shinra Company has created materia in its greatest state so far: huge materia!"

"There it is." Zack said, confirming the stone with his eyes. I hadn't even seen materia up close before, and somehow I knew that this was so much more impressive. The stone shined a bright red, coloring the nearby surfaces around it. I wondered what exactly it was meant to do, and if this was a fake, what exactly the real one looked like. I looked at Zack, and it seemed like he might have been wondering the same thing. He started smiling, and then turned that smile to me. "Now all we have to do is wait." He said, but before he even started his next sentence, I knew he didn't mean we would wait there, "Now, how about we take a look around?


	9. A SOLDIER's Innocence Part 2

**Zack**

The bait was set, and our mission commenced. Shortly after Dio revealed the fake huge materia, the guests at Battle Square went back to their pre-fight jitters and left only a few curious tourists to peruse the museum. It was highly unlikely that whatever undercover assailants we were expecting would strike immediately, or even within the first day, so I decided that that would be the opportune time to have some fun of my own. I gestured to lead Cloud out of the Square the way we came. He had seemed way too tense the entire time we'd been there. I knew we were on a mission, but we also had a day that was just about guaranteed to be duty free. At an amusement park. What else did he need? I was stopped near the stairs out by Dio himself. He threw an arm over my shoulder, passing me a pamphlet.

"Big fight later on tonight!" He boomed as I took the paper, "Lots'o' contestants. Bet your gp and you could win big prizes!" Gp was a Gold Saucer token that you have to pay for to begin with. We didn't have any, but I could see that Dio was just trying to make it heard that his business with us was purely un-suspicious. His voice then got more hushed and he whispered to me: "Inside the pamphlet is a pair of receivers. They'll go off if someone tampers with the safety of the materia. They'll start beeping." He pointed at Cloud with his thumb, "Your friend's getting the backup receiver, so don't let anything happen to them, huh?" He then gave me a big pat on the back and his booming voice came back with a laugh, "I hope to see you there! Enjoy your time at Gold Saucer!"

I stuck the pamphlets in my pocket as Dio strolled away, then turned to shine Cloud an excited grin. He still looked a little high strung, but he smiled back at me in response.

"Where to?" he said, beating me to the question. There were a lot of places to choose from. Gold Saucer was pretty circular, so you could get just about anywhere you wanted to just by walking in one direction long enough. There were also a series of elevators, escalators and slides to speed up the process. Examining the tree like map on the wall, I decided to leave our destination up to eeny, meeny, miny, and mo. However, as I began to point my finger from spot to spot, it moved over a small picture of a hamburger marking a food spot on the map and my stomach interrupted me. I turned to Cloud, and he was still expecting an answer.

"You hungry?" I asked, my stomach growling under my hand.

"Yes, sir." He said, and he sounded humorous enough that I could let him get away with calling me sir again. I gestured once more for him to follow me, and set off in the direction of Chocobo Square. It took us a few minutes to get there, but before even arriving at the Square, I could smell the chocobos. Not cooked chocobos, however. Despite being a large bird, chocobos took a different path than ending up as someone's dinner. I didn't think that cooking chocobos was even legal, but I couldn't say for sure. Anyway, even uncooked chocobos had a very pungent odor. I thought it was interesting that they should choose to have food stands this close to them. I supposed that it was more beneficial to draw in the people who were here for the chocobos. Cloud wrinkled his nose in surprise as we approached. "Is that smell... chocobos?"

"Sure is." I stopped to gaze around at the food stands, "You've never been near a chocobo before?"

"I have." Cloud shook his head, "It was just a long time ago." I took notice of a stand with a number of free seats outside in front of it.

"How about we eat here?" I asked, and upon Cloud's approval I stepped up to the counter to view the menu, "We can walk a distance with the food if you'd like." I said back to Cloud, "Y'know, to avoid the smell."

"I don't mind it actually." He was looking over the menu as well, "It sort of reminds me of home in a strange way." I heard him chuckle a little, "Probably because of that one time a chocobo was there."

"Really?" I said, ordering my food at the same time, "I usually hear people complaining about it, but I don't mind it either." Cloud orders and I use the Shinra card to pay for the both of us. "Just a farm boy thing, huh?" I hit him lightly on the shoulder and he made a sound that was like a chuckle and a scoff at the same time. Seats weren't hard to find as most of the customers were either heading to see the chocobos or walking elsewhere with their food. I forked through the rice on my plate and looked back to Cloud. "So the only time you saw a chocobo was in Nibelheim, huh?" Cloud stayed silent for a moment, but he didn't seem to react much. Sort of like he didn't hear me.

"Yeah." He said finally, and laughed a little, "The thing tried to bite my hair and scared me so badly." He paused again, "You know, because I was really young at the time."

"Tch." I swallowed a bite of rice I took, "If a chocobo tried to bite my hair right now, I'd probably be scared." A man sitting at a table next to ours turned his attention to us and tilted up his large black hat to speak.

"The chocobo must have had a bad trainer." I didn't know who this guy was, but he was something to look at, wearing that hat, a red buckled vest and a pair of white trousers. "The chocobo is a docile creature by nature," He continued, "But just like everything else, if it is treated solely with disrespect, it learns to disrespect back."

"You're one of the Chocobo Jockeys, aren't you?" I realized after a moment of analyzing his getup.

"That I am." He responded, standing from his seat, "You have not heard of me? My name is Joe." He took a bow. "I am an upcoming superstar to the circuit."

"They race chocobos here?" Cloud asked, looking interested in all of this.

"They do." Joe answered along with my nod, "Me and my chocobo, Teioh, are the best there is. Bet on us tonight, and you will not lose."

"Best there is, huh?" I do my best to sound skeptical.

"That is correct." He nodded, "You will find my chocobo racing under the title of Hyperion, and you will not be disappointed." He then turned and shuffled off in the direction of the Square. Cloud looked at me, obviously interested to see what I thought first.

"Well, it kind of sounds like another advertisement." I shrugged, considering the situation, "But it would be fun to actually watch a Chocobo Race, wouldn't it?"

"Yeah," Cloud agreed, but it sounded like it came with a but, "But will Shinra actually pay for us to gamble?" I took another bite of my food before answering.

"Don't worry about it." I said with a somewhat full mouth. I swallowed and kept talking, "I think that you can bet using gp, and you can buy that with the card." I flashed him the credit card once again.

"You can really use that with no limit?"

"Pretty much." I put the card away, "Unless I were to charge up something astronomical, I'm pretty much in the green. Just another perk for being a first class." I was used to flaunting my rank with some of my friends in SOLDIER, but I wished that I could take that one back. Cloud looked like he felt out of place again, and the table went silent for a few minutes. I finished my meal and turned my gaze up from the table to see that Cloud had finished his too. "What do you say?" I said out of nowhere, "Let's do it."

"Go to the chocobo race?" He asked, startled by the concept.

"Why not?" I gave a little shrug, "I mean, how many of these do you think we'll get the opportunity to see in our lives?"

"I-I guess." He thought aloud, "Yeah, sure. Why not?"

We left our seats and walked down the hall to the Square. It was quite the sight. Shining colors lit the rows of photos of the previous Master Chocobo Jockeys, surrounded by fancy frames. Much like many places in Gold Saucer, there was no roof, so we could see the sky getting darker above the walls. At the end of the hall, there were many flashing signs depicting chocobos and their riders. We were greeted by a woman in a cowgirl hat as we approached the counter.

"Can I get gp here?" I asked her, clearly new to the whole experience. She glanced at the card in my hand, signifying that I was a Shinra employee. Only the employees were aloud to simply _purchase_ the points. Otherwise you had to win them from various attractions around the park.

"Yes you can!" She grinned at me, "How much would you like, sir?" I looked over the racers and the rules above the girl and there didn't seem to be a minimum bet, so I figured I'd just get what I wanted to bet, and a bit more for doing other things around the park.

"I'll get a thousand gp." I decided.

"That'll be a thousand gil, please." She was kind of cute, actually. I figured they purposely put a pretty girl at the counter so that customers would want to spend more money. I handed her the Shinra card and she looked impressed. She swiped it and met my smile with one of her own. "Here's your gp, sir." I took the tokens and nodded at her to say goodbye. Interestingly enough, seeing her there made me miss Aerith.

Cloud and I came to another booth before the seating area. Yet another hat wearing girl greeted us at the window.

"Two tickets?" She asked, and appeared to be printing them before I answered her.

"Yeah. Two." I said.

"Placing a bet?" She continued, straight to the point. I turned to look at Cloud.

"One hundred gp on the racer of his choice." I said, gesturing.

"My choice?" Cloud frowned, "Well how about that guy we saw? Joe."

"One hundred on Joe." The ticket girl repeated, printing out the slips and handing them to us, "Please enjoy the race you two."

The seating area for the races was huge. As we walked inside, I could only imagine how many people must arrive to championship races. The seats were numbered, and me and Cloud's were somewhere in the middle of the area where we were standing, at numbers three-sixteen and three-seventeen. Like most sporting events, the place had a strong smell to it. Unlike most sporting events, that smell wasn't hot dogs, beer, and popcorn. Instead, it was chocobo, and boy was it strong here. It still didn't bother me though, and judging by the expression of contentment on Cloud's face as we sat down, he felt the same way.

About fifteen minutes after we sat down, the jockeys and their chocobos had lined up and were waiting for the checkered flag to swing so that they could begin the race. All of a sudden, the track shined a bright white for just a moment and revealed a bunch of holographic images and terrains that would decorate tonight's racecourse. The crowd went crazy and a massive screen displaying the racers lowered from the roof of the stadium. Cloud looked more startled than anything, but he eventually made his way into one of his small smiles.

"Wow." He said, and I silently agreed. Then, the flag swung.

The chocobos sped so quickly down the tracks that it was almost difficult to keep up with them without watching the screen above. Joe was the only racer on the track that had a black feathered chocobo, so it was easy to pick him out. Unfortunately, he was racing around the center of the pack, keeping a place around third or fourth. As the chocobos entered the last stretch of the race, Joe's chocobo suddenly began sprinting passed all of the others. He took first place about five seconds before crossing the finish line. The crowd started cheering as confetti fell from the ceiling and Joe was displayed on the screen for all to see. Even Cloud and I stood in applause. Cloud said something that I couldn't hear, and I looked at him and mouthed for him to repeat it. He cupped his hands around his mouth to shout it again.

"We won!"


	10. A SOLDIER's Innocence Part 3

**A Heart For My Nobody Says: Hey guys! Just a quick note... This is the tenth post I've made for this story, and I haven't gotten too many reviews. I'm really interested to see what you guys think so far, whether you like it or not, etc. I've actually been getting quite a number of hits on the story, which is really great! I'd just like to hear a little bit back from you guys. So if you have the time, it would be really appreciated if you would leave me a review! I try and respond to every review that I'm given too, so it won't be like you're talking to a brick wall. Feedback's one of my favorite things, after all. Thanks for listening. Enjoy the story!**

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**Cloud**

I hadn't ever really won anything in my life. I had a couple of arguments as a child that I thought I had won, and maybe a board game here and there, but that was it. I supposed it may not have been entirely my winnings, as Zack had actually paid for the bet we placed on the race, or at least he paid for it with Shinra's money. Nonetheless, I accepted the two-hundred gp quite proudly from the booth before turning around to face Zack again.

"Pretty loud crowd, huh?" He said, trying to fix his ear with his pinky, "My head's still ringing." I felt strange to tell him that mine wasn't. I also felt too strange to tell him that I didn't feel like I could be afraid of chocobos anymore. Not like I really was. At least not since I was little. All I could really do was hand him the gp and ask where we were going next. He just looked at my outstretched hand and smiled, "You keep it. It was your bet." He said. I considered arguing the subject, but instead I just retracted my hand and pocketed the tokens.

"Where to?" I asked, and he finished poking his ear to stretch out his arms. He took his phone from his pocket and flipped it out. Despite the similar colors, it was still strange to see Zack wearing something that wasn't a uniform.

"It's quarter past seven." He considered, "We've still got plenty of time. Do you want to head down and play some of the arcade games?"

"Sounds fun." I said, shifting my tokens around in my pocket. I wasn't quite used to my new clothes either. The turtleneck was just slightly too big, but I think the weird part was that it was a lot more comfortable then my uniform, and I didn't have to wear a helmet. I wasn't used to comfort.

"Wonder Square it is." Zack finished stretching with a smile and started to walk. I followed behind, paying closer attention to the Jockeys framed on the walls.

Gold Saucer was shaped kind of like a tree, and as it would happen, Chocobo Square was near the top, and Wonder Square was near the bottom. This didn't really matter, because the elevators could take us there fast enough, but it was always surprising to get a glance out the window or to look over one of the edges and see the height difference. It only ever took us about ten minutes to get from square to square, ignoring everything in-between, but at that point it was about seven thirty, and that extra ten minutes was enough to push 'getting dark' to 'dark'. The night sky was over us when we stepped out into Wonder Square, and all of the many lights were lit, making the park look even more amazing than it did before. Chocobo mascots ran around and sold balloons, and it was late enough that the couples had come out to win each other prizes. Just entering the Square, I spotted a young girl and guy trying themselves on a Love Tester. They apparently got a good result and giggled with each other, running off into the arcade.

"You two look like you're trying to decide what to do!" One of the mascots said, stepping up to us from behind. Zack and I turned to look at him. "Maybe a fortune will help you make up your minds. Just ten gp each!"

"Hmmm." Zack cocked his head at the man, "Sure. Cloud, you want your fortune told?"

"Yeah." I faced the teller as if it was necessary to the process.

"Alright." The mascot placed his hands out in front of me in the air, "I can feel your fate flowing through me. Oh! It says..." He began to do a dance, and I gave Zack an awkward look, "Aha! You will have a romantic encounter here at the park! Maybe this will be the one!" I tried not to look as taken aback as I felt. It wasn't quite what I was expecting. I took a step back from the man and gestured towards Zack.

"Yeah," Zack nodded, planting his hands on his hips and looking self-important, "What've you got for me?"

"Oh, oh. Let me see!" The man said, taking his position again in front of Zack, "You... you... your aura shows me your future!" He started his dance again, and Zack just watched eagerly, "Oh, I see it! You will win great amounts of gp here in Wonder Square!"

"Oh, that's it?" Zack frowned, letting his hands slide off his hips. He paid, and we started walking again, heading in the direction of the arcade, "You got lucky with yours." Zack said to me after a moment, "Mine was just an attempt to make me spend more money." I tried not to react to the mention of my fortune.

"It's just a sham, anyway." I shrugged, "Mine's probably designed to make me stick around longer." Zack linked his fingers together behind his head as we walked.

"I dunno," He said, sounding surprisingly serious, "Never let a chance for a romantic encounter slip by. You never know what you might miss." He stopped, staring into the game filled arcade before us, and his expression suddenly turned to a grin once again, "Just like I'm not gonna let a chance to win great amounts of gp slip by!" He tapped me on the shoulder and ran ahead. I didn't know what to do but to run in after him. So I did.

Zack stopped short in front of a couple of simulator games. I probably would've run into him had he not been as ahead of me as he was. He tilted his head back and forth, examining the games.

"What do you think?" He said, looking to me, "Snowboard or motorcycle?" I looked to where he'd been looking at the simulators. Both games had a setup like you were actually riding the one you chose. I thought the idea of standing on a snowboard motion pad looked fun, but I would be far less likely to fall on the motorcycle. Falling on a game seemed like something that it was funny to be worried about, at least for an infantryman with Shinra, but the truth of the matter was that everything was a bit more difficult when not accompanied by the adrenaline rush of battle.

"_You_ should play the snowboard one." I finally answered. Zack took a second to examine the machine.

"Looks like it costs gil, and you win gp." He said, climbing up on the board and inserting some money. The game started instantly. Zack leaned forward on the board to start his character down a mountain of snow. He was doing well at first, but the game got steadily more difficult, and he soon found his character boarding face-first into trees. The sad image of his character lying flat in the snow, crushed by a snowman, marked the end of his game. Looking defeated, he stepped off the board and I couldn't help but to laugh just a little. "The things hard." Zack finally said, admitting his own defeat. I didn't know what I was hoping for, but I chose that moment to climb up on the board myself.

"Well, let's see how I do." I said, putting some of my own money in the machine. That was a mistake. I ended up stuck between a wall and a tree, and it sort of looked like they were playing pong with my character. It wasn't long until game over was written across the screen in ominous red letters. I stepped off the board in my shame, and Zack looked to feel a little better about himself. "Let's find something a little easier." I sighed.

"How about this?" Zack said, walking up to a basketball throwing game, "Super Dunk. Can't be too hard, right?" I thought it at the time; famous last words. Twenty tosses and twelve misses later, it turned out that this game was really _not_ any easier. "I was always told that I had to improve my accuracy." Zack said, scratching the back of his neck and laughing at himself.

"You thought that Battle Square looked fun, right?" I said, eying a 3D battle game, "How about you try this one?"

"You first." Zack insisted, stretching his arms after the ball game. I stepped up to the battler and put the money in. The game was about predicting when to hit high, low, or in the mid body area. I didn't do _too_ bad, almost beating the third opponent in the game. Zack walked up to the plate when I got my game over. Surprisingly, he did worse than I had, losing to the second guy. "Geez." He laughed, stepping off of the machine, "The kids who get good at this ought to join SOLDIER." His eye then caught yet another game as a couple stepped away from it. It was a funny looking pink game, with the words 'Mog House' written across the top. Zack just laughed as he considered the game. "We _have_ to be able to beat this game." He decided. I nodded in agreement, and we put the gil in.

The game was about a young creature called a mog, who had also been named Mog, coincidentally. The narrator of the game told us that in order to find a mate, Mog had to learn how to fly, and it was our objective to feed him kupo nuts until he succeeded. It sounded simple enough, but the problem was that he never seemed to be done eating nuts. Then, when he tried to fly, he would have been overfed and just fell straight to the ground. When we finally got it right, both Zack and I yelled "Yes!" at the same time. I figured that we must have looked like idiots to anyone that was watching. I thought about how if the Wutai under covers had seen us playing that game, they would have _never_ suspected us. The game ended with Mog getting a wife and starting a family. Just as sappy as we'd expected from the beginning.

"We won the game." Zack said, victoriously turning to me. We had been standing rather close together so that we could both see the screen, "And there was your romantic moment." He laughed, but he sounded tired, "Happy mogs. I guess I'll just have to wait for my huge amounts of gp."

"Yeah," I laughed with him, equally as tired, "It figures that the one game we completed doesn't give gp." He leaned against the game and stared up at the lights on the ceiling.

"Oh well." He said, smiling, "I had fun. There's been too much of a lack of fun lately."

"Mm..." I stared up at the lights too, "It's kind of late, huh?"

"Yup." He said, pushing himself off of the machine, "Time to head back for tonight. Maybe if we get some sleep, we can stay out later tomorrow?"

"Sounds good." I said, stepping away from the machine myself.

The walk back to the hotel felt longer than it was. We didn't really talk to each other on the way there, but we _did_ exchange a few yawns. It was only just after nine when we arrived back at the room, but we'd had an early morning, and I was by far tired enough to go to sleep. I slipped off my shoes and walked to the window to enjoy the view of the many night lights. Zack's first destination was the bathroom to brush his teeth. I watched as a gondola slowly drifted by in the distance. The view from that ride must have been amazing at this hour. I simply stared out the window until Zack came out. Jumping, I felt Zack's hand near my hip. A small metal ball with a red light dropped from his grip into my pocket.

"It's the receptor." Zack said, moving in to stare out the window next to me, "I forgot to give it to you earlier." His breath smelled minty from brushing.

"Hmm." I nodded, settling down a bit, "Do you think they'll do something tomorrow?"

"Heh... I hope not." Zack laughed softly, "I could use another day like this." He smiled out the window and then turned his eyes to mine, "It was fun, wasn't it?" I hadn't actually seen the mako in his eyes this close before.

"Yeah." I said, because it was. Zack took a few steps back and let himself drop into the bed behind him.

"I'm bushed." He said, eyes closed, "I'll see you when you wake up."

"Yeah." I said again, walking across the room to my bed and the light switch, but I figured that Zack had pretty much fallen asleep right there and then. And not long after the light was flicked off, I was out cold as well.


	11. A SOLDIER's Innocence Part 4

**Zack**

It was pretty cool just to wake up in Gold Saucer. Even as a SOLDIER, I didn't get many chances to go to big vacation spots like that, and the chances I _did_ get almost never allowed for me to stay the night. Cloud was still asleep when I woke up, so I decided to surprise him and order room service for breakfast. I told them to hold off about a half-hour before bringing it up, just in case Cloud planned on sleeping a bit longer, and then proceeded to do squats while I waited. The previous night had been a lot of fun, and I felt almost anxious to get out to the park again. I wanted to head out early, just in case we'd get interrupted by our work later in the day. I heard a rustle come from Cloud's bed.

"How many?" He asked, waking to my squats.

"Eighty-nine, ninety..." I started counting out loud. Cloud laughed.

"That's impressive." He said, stretching and dropping his legs off of the bed. It wasn't really _that_ impressive compared to what I usually did. I did a few more squats to round myself off at one hundred, and started stretching my arms.

"So," I said after a bit, finishing my stretches, "What sort of trouble should we get ourselves into today?"

"What should we do?" Cloud verified, "I sort of feel like going for a swim."

"A swim, huh?" I took a seat on the foot of my bed, "I think there's a pool just outside the hotel. We'll have to get some bathing suits though." There was a knock on our door.

"Room service!" A voice announced, and Cloud looked up in interest.

"You ordered food?" He questioned, stepping off the bed and toward the door. He opened the door and rolled in the tray, thanking the man. I stepped up to examine the food. I hadn't known what Cloud would like to eat, so I just ordered a bunch of stuff. Pancakes, waffles, eggs, bacon, toast, sausages, home fries, and even a couple of pastries. Cloud was looking over the food in awe. "You ordered a lot, huh?"

"Yep." I said, hands on my hips. I was proud of myself for making Cloud look a bit more calm than he had been recently. I supposed that maybe after a little while of being without our uniforms, he'd forget a bit about me being a first class and him being infantry. I figured that the previous night had helped him to cool down as well. I knew that I'd be having fun here, but actually _playing_ the arcade games kind of got me into the groove as well. I turned my attention back to the food and started making a plate of sausages and eggs for myself. Cloud took a bit of bacon, some sausages, eggs, and a piece of toast. I guessed he was hungry.

"Yeah," Cloud said after a few minutes, "I forgot that we didn't bring bathing suits. Is it really okay to keep buying these things?"

"Hey, I told you not to worry about it." I said, swallowing my food, "This is really no expense for Shinra. Unless you'd rather go swimming without one?" I laughed and Cloud just cracked an awkward smile at his toast, "That'd be a way to clear out the pool, anyway."

"I don't think we're supposed to draw that kind of attention to us." He said after a bite. I just made a noise meant to convey 'you're probably right', and ate another egg. A few minutes later, we finished eating our food, and Cloud beat me to the punch, asking: "Do you want to head out?"

The day was a nice one. The sun lit a mostly cloud free sky, and it was warm, but not too warm. I figured that was different for the dessert below, but Gold Saucer did it's best to keep a regulated temperature. Just as I expected, as soon as the two of us walked out to were the pool was, we could see a little water-themed shop just waiting for people like us who didn't bring the proper gear.

"Looks like that's our place." I pointed across the pool.

"Okay." Cloud responded, taking the whole place in, "We should go get the suits while the pool's still quiet." We took a walk around the poolside. The pavement was damp and the air smelled of chlorine. It was kind of pleasant in the morning, actually. The shop, self-claimed to be Water Square, was full of floatation devices, goggles, masks, sunscreen, umbrellas, tanning-lotion, surf-boards, etc. And they did, in fact, have a small little section for bathing suits. Cloud and I walked over to look through the swim trunks. They were mostly all goofy, decorated with chocobo print, or flames, or little mogs like the ones in Mog House. After resisting the temptation of getting the flames, I picked out the plainest one I could find: a pair of long black shorts with 'Gold Saucer' written on the leg. Cloud got a brown pair of the same thing.

"There's a set of dressin' rooms here if ya'd like." The old man behind the counter told us, just after ringing the items up. I slid the card and thanked him, and it was to the dressing room for me. There were three rooms, and me and Cloud took two of them. I was dressed first, and stepped out, now shoeless, shirtless, and ready to swim. Cloud stepped out a minute later, still in his shirt along with his new trunks.

"Are you gonna swim in a shirt?" I said after a pause.

"No. I guess not." He said, and pulled it off over his head. Cloud was actually more muscular than I would have thought, given his thin body structure. He must have had a regimen of exercises as well. "Ready?" He said, folding his shirt under his arm, and out we went. Our clothes were set down by a beach chair not too far from the pool. I had to make sure that they were in sight just in case. After all, we were still keeping the receptors in there. I dipped my toe in the water, and it was nice and warm. Normally, I might have done a cannonball in, but it was a bit early in the morning for that, and I didn't want to scare Cloud off. Instead, I stepped down the stairs and let myself float into the water. Cloud sat down at the side of the pool and let his feet dangle in. "How's is it?" He asked.

"Pretty nice." I said, floating up closer to him, "It's about as warm for the rest of your body as it is for your feet. You should get in." He shrugged, and then slid off the side into the pool. "See?" I said, and he didn't respond. He just floated there and put his back against the wall, looking content. I thought about trying to do some underwater squats, but I didn't figure that would work too well. I sat on the stairs of the pool for a few minutes, just enjoying the water, and then I looked up at Cloud. "We might as well be in a hot tub." I said, growing too restless to lounge, "Race me?"

"I'm good." Cloud said, closing his eyes in a smile, "I'd never out swim a first class SOLDIER, anyway." I frowned at him.

"You're no fun." I said, dejected. I decided to simply race myself, and took off, swimming down the pool. I touched the other side and propelled myself back to where Cloud was. When I came up from the water by the stairs, I ran my fingers through my sufficiently wet hair. "Something on your mind?" I asked Cloud, not even turning to face him. I heard a dunking sound in the water behind me and turned around just in time to see Cloud's blonde hair surface.

"Not really." He responded after a moment, shaking his head to get the bangs out of his face. I swam a little closer to wear he was and rested against the wall to mimic him. His hair was a darker color now that it was wet. I moved even closer to him.

"Your hair is wet now." I said, as if he didn't know, "You have no excuse not to race me."

"I wasn't trying to protect my hair." He turned his head to stare me in the eyes, "I wear a helmet half the time."

"Well..." I consider what to say next, "You do a good job keeping it tidy, considering."

"My hair is tidy?" His gaze turned confused.

"Yeah."

"Well... thank you." He said, softening his stare. I opened my mouth to talk, and a small ringing noise could be heard from my clothes. It wasn't the receptor, but my cell phone going off. I grimaced and turned around to pull myself out of the water, grabbing one of the towels I brought down from the hotel. I just barely dried my hands fast enough to grab the phone, and I flipped it open.

"Hello," I said, sounding more out of breath then I was.

"Hi, Zack." Aerith's soft voice came over the phone.

"Oh!" I said in surprise. It had been a good while since I'd talked to her, "Aerith! Hey, guess where I am?"

"Can I have a hint?" She questioned.

"Well," I thought about it, "It's in the middle of a dessert, I was just swimming, and there are chocobos."

"Chocobos?" She repeated, "And in a dessert? Hmm..." The phone went silent for a long moment, "You're in Gold Saucer, aren't you?"

"Bingo." I grinned even though she couldn't see me, drying my hair off with a towel while I talked.

"Look at you." She giggled, "All grown up."

"Yeah, yeah." I waved my hand in dismissal, "I'm actually here on a mission, but I should really bring you some time! It's amazing." I turned my body around as I talked, and I noticed Cloud looking less content in the water. A few more people had entered the pool at this point.

"Sounds fun." Aerith thought aloud as Cloud climbed out of the pool.

"Listen," I said to Aerith, "I need to go right now, because there's someone waiting on me. But I'll call you soon, okay?"

"Hmmm..." I heard her hum over the phone, "Okay. I'll talk to you soon, then."

"Yeah." I nodded as Cloud approached, "Bye, Aerith." The phone clicked shut in my hand and I turned to Cloud. He was drying off as well. "Sorry about that."

"No problem." Cloud shrugged, drying his legs, "Work related?"

"No. It was a friend of mine." I put the phone away, "Did you want to go out to the park?"

"Yeah, sure." Cloud agreed. We changed back into our normal clothes in the dressing rooms and had one of the staff take our swim trunks back to our room. When we were all set and ready to go, I poked my finger around the map outside the hotel.

"Okay," I said finally, working plans out in my head, "Let's go." I began to walk ahead and I felt Cloud grab my arm from behind.

"Hey," He said, stepping in front of me, "You led me around all day yesterday. Today, I'll lead _you_ around." I gave him an impressed look and he started off leading the way.

Cloud was _definitely_ becoming more comfortable.


	12. A SOLDIER's Innocence Part 5

**Cloud**

I had finally stepped out of my comfort zone. It may have taken an unexpected invite to an amusement park, a night of arcade games, a chocobo race, a spot of room service, and a brief dip in a pool, but I had finally done something to separate myself from the other infantrymen that no change of clothes could match up to. I told a SOLDIER first class that _I_ was taking the lead. And when I did, Zack gave me the first smile that said more to me then 'let's go have some fun'. It may have been silly, but I actually felt quite a rush from it. Obviously, after taking the lead, I didn't have enough courage left to even turn around and look at him again. Despite feeling separated from the rest of the infantry, saying that to Zack made me more aware that he was a first class than I had been the entire trip so far. I felt like I might as well have told_ Sephiroth_ that I was in charge. Of course, Zack had a friendlier disposition then Sephiroth, and he hadn't yet challenged me to a fight to see who was better suited to be leader.

My decision was a sort of on the spot move, and I hadn't yet planned on a destination, so as I approached one of the numerous sign posts that directed guests through the park, I went the first direction that caught my interest. That direction took us once again to Wonder Square, where we had played the arcade games the previous night. Zack took a look around, taking in the scene. The place was quite a bit different during the daytime. Gold Saucer's anthem was playing proudly from the speakers all around, and there were a lot more people then there had been at night.

"Good thinking." Zack said after a moment, "We never really finished up here last time, huh?" He walked a straight line to the counter where people could cash in their gp for prizes. I took note that the board said that gp stood for 'gold points', which had been something I wondered about the last night. The man behind the counter just watched Zack as he eyed the list of prizes. His eyes finally locked onto the same thing that caught my attention at the bottom of the list. There was a prize marked by four question marks that cost two-thousand gold points. Zack turned around to face me, and I knew what he was going to say before he opened his mouth, "A mystery prize."

"If they don't tell you what it is, it's probably not worth it." I said, not actually expecting that sense to get through to him.

"Ah, come on," He smiled and placed a hand on my shoulder, "The mystery itself makes it worthwhile." He paused and leaned in close to me, "Besides, it's on Shinra." He whispered with a hint of mischievousness, "Now, how about I win you that prize?" He started off into the arcade before I had a chance to answer. I walked in to find him putting gil into the 3D Battler. That wasn't too surprising as he was getting frustrated with it the previous night. I gave Zack a look and he returned a confident nod, stretching his arms in preparation for the fight. On his first try, he did better then he had on the previous night, taking down three computerized foes before falling to the fourth. However, the gp payout for that was mediocre and Zack looked less then satisfied when he collected it.

"I bet you never get much from this game," I laughed a little at the face he made at his tokens.

"Yeah, well..." Zack pocketed the gp, "If it was real physical battles, I'd be rich with gp in no time." His eyes locked onto something behind me, and he started off in that direction. I half expected to see a woman there as I turned around. He didn't necessarily seem that way, but Zack's reputation had people saying that he was a bit of a flirt back at the company. It wasn't a woman that caught his attention, however. It was quite the opposite. Zack had approached a mechanized torso of a big, burly man with a mustache, holding his hand up, elbow leaned on a counter. It was an arm-wrestling game, and Zack was simply glowing. "This is what I'm talking about!" He grinned back at me as I walked up to him.

"Careful not to break the machine there." I laughed as Zack put the money in. He first played on a medium difficulty, and for a second I actually thought that he _would_ break it. The arm was down on the machine in less then five seconds, and gp was dispensed from a slot underneath. "Hmm." I said, not even meaning to make any noise out loud, "You're a SOLDIER." I reminded him, "Why play on medium difficulty?" For a moment, I thought I had gotten too bold. Zack just gave me a stare and raised his eyebrows, letting the silence hold for a moment or two. He finally cracked a grin, but when he stepped to the side, throwing out an inviting arm, I got worried again.

"How about _you_ play on hard?" He smirked, and the challenge was set. I knew I was crazy to accept, but I felt comfortable enough about losing a game in front of Zack, unlike just about anyone in the infantry, as that would inevitably lead to all kinds of new names for me. Besides, it wasn't like I had to arm-wrestle _him_, or anything.

"Fine." I decided aloud, placing my arm down on the table and grasping the hand of the machine. It had a weird feeling to it. All the muscle structures on the man were accurate enough, but he was made with a tough leather that almost made me feel like I was going to arm-wrestle a couch. Zack put the money into the machine and selected the hard setting, and a little three-light timer counted down like a race was about to start. The final beeping noise on the counter started the machine off, pressing hard against my hand. I was pushed back at first, but I managed to get into an arm lock with the burly man in an upright position.

"Come on!" Zack said after a minute of watching. I wasn't quite sure whether he was being impatient or rooting for me until he continued, "You've got this!" And he was right. As it turned out, the machine was programmed with a stamina timer to keep things fair, so after a long lock, it began to lose energy and I managed to press the hand down. A victory sound boomed from the game, and I heard the clinking noises of the gold point tokens dropping out below.

"Keep the spoils." I said, turning away and rotating my tired arm. Zack clapped a few times and walked around to stare me in the face.

"Hey, that was impressive." I couldn't help but feel like it wasn't really _that_ impressive. Zack was a first class SOLDIER. I also couldn't help but smile, because he sounded genuine, and I knew he wasn't faking his smile. "I'm gonna try the battler again." he nodded towards the game, "I swear I'm gonna beat that thing. In fact, you should try it too." I laughed and shook my head.

"I'm a little tired." I rubbed my arm for emphasis, "I think I'm going to try the motorcycle game." He shrugged, and we parted ways in the arcade. I sat down at the motorcycle game, apparently called 'G Bike', and put in the required gil. I had always wanted to ride a motorcycle, but this game was a bit more intense then just riding. The object of the game was to defend a car from taking damage. The player would be riding a motorcycle, and there would be motorcycle riding enemies that the player had to take down before they hit the car. It was simple enough, but difficult, or at least difficult enough to keep me on my toes, or wheels, the entire time. I didn't actually lose though, and partway through, Zack stepped up beside me to watch the game. My victory earned me a nice pile of gold points, and I noticed Zack nodding in approval.

"Do that again." He laughed, and so I did it again. Zack took a seat on an unused game next to mine. The second time playing was easier and harder at the same time. I almost lost a few times simply because I was distracted by Zack's stare. For a lot of the game, he was actually looking at me and not the screen. I started to wonder if I was making faces or something, and trying to be more conscious of that took my attention away from the game itself. Despite the difficulties, I won for a second time, and was met with the applause of Zack and a couple of other people who had apparently joined in to watch. I felt strange, not quite used to being the object of attention while sitting next to Zack. I supposed that if I were to ever make SOLDIER myself, I would have to get used to things being more personal, and to having attention drawn onto me instead of my squad.

The crowd that was watching broke up, and Zack and I continued to play games around the arcade. We took turns playing one game in which we would shoot down submarines, and we even had a two player face-off against each others' submarines. Zack won. Getting caught up in games, we didn't really notice the time slipping by. It wasn't until we reached our goal of two-thousand gp that we noticed the sun going down.

"That's enough for the prize." Zack finished counting the tokens, "What do say we cash these in and get something to eat?"

"Sounds good." I decided, although I had been enjoying myself a bit too much to notice my stomach. We walked up to the prize counter, and I watched Zack as he proudly displayed his winnings to the man. It took a minute or two for the guy to count it up, but Zack had indeed****placed exactly two-thousand gold points down, despite the fact that we actually won a little bit more. Triumphantly, Zack pointed out the question marked prize, and the man leaned down to get something out of a case. When he stood back up, he was holding a semi-transparent orb that looked like it was filled with a suspended liquid.

"It's a materia!" The man handed it over to Zack, "They say that holding onto it makes you learn things much faster than you normally would." Zack examined the orb, turning it over in his hands a few times.

"Thanks." He smiled at the man and then walked my direction, "Here, Cloud." He outstretched his hands toward me, doing his best to cover up the prize before I took it from him, "It's a materia." He told me, even though I was close enough to hear the man, "I'm not sure it actually does anything," he paused, "but it's yours!" I looked over the materia. I wasn't really sure what to say, because Zack was making me feel like one of those girls who had their boyfriend win them a prize. Zack put a hand on my shoulder after a moment, "At least it's pretty, right?"

"Yeah." I said, still not really knowing how to react. I wasn't used to people getting me anything, and even if it _was_ on Shinra, this wasn't the first thing Zack had gotten me on that trip, "Thanks." Zack just smiled in return.

"Now how about we get some food." He started back up, walking in the direction to leave the Square. I guessed that despite my attempt to lead, Zack was a natural, and he was still getting me things and guiding my steps. I still considered my actions earlier to be a victory, however, because I knew that I was getting through to Zack as a person now, and not as an infantryman. I supposed that I already had, just to be invited along on this mission, and that in itself was enough.

So Zack led on, and I followed.


	13. A SOLDIER's Innocence Part 6

**Zack**

Cloud was impressive. Even after seeing him a few times during other missions, I had never even gotten a taste of what he was really like. It seemed that it had finally been long enough out of uniform, and Cloud was finally opening up a little. Even though I'd been hoping that would happen, I hadn't actually thought through what he might be like, and it took me by surprise. Looking at the Shinra infantrymen, it was easy to see a heard of rowdy army guys who would straighten themselves out while you were watching. They weren't usually all that hardened, except for maybe the captains, and the ones that _were_ quickly gained promotions or jobs in another departments such as special duty, SOLDIER, or even the Turks. I supposed that those stereotypes had gotten to me, and Cloud didn't fit the bill at all. Cloud was strong, steady minded and mature, but he still had a fun side to differentiate from some of the stiffs at work. I should have gotten that impression when he was keeping up with me at Modeoheim.

Even along with any physical toughness, it took real guts for an infantryman to look a SOLDIER in the eye and tell him that he'd lead the way, never mind a first class. That's what Cloud did, though. It was actually getting hard to think of him as infantry, which I suppose, for me, was half the point in this mission. I didn't want to think of Cloud as a lower rank then me, and I didn't want him to think of me as a higher one. I figured that when the time came to act on the Wutai under-covers, it would help to think of each other as equals. Nonetheless, I actually found _myself_ jealous of his courage. I wasn't sure that I would have been able to do the same thing in his position. Cloud was impressive.

The time had gotten late as we were winning ourselves some materia at the arcade, and most of the food stands had closed up for the night. Our choices were either ice cream, or returning to the hotel to make use of the twenty-four hour room service. I was just about to settle for ice cream when I overheard a young lady saying something about catching a bit to eat at Event Square. It looked like Cloud had overheard the same thing.

"Well," I said, rolling my shoulders and placing a hand on Cloud's back. He didn't flinch like he normally would. "How about we catch a bite to eat at Event Square?" Cloud made a noise like a huff and a laugh.

"Sure," he said, walking forward to lead the way again. He kept his pace slow until I joined him at his side. It took a few minutes to get to Event Square, as we had to walk a ways even after getting off the elevator. Cloud looked up at me while we were approaching the entrance. "Zack?" He sounded like he had something on his mind. That was when we were interrupted by the sound of a crowd, booming from many seats around the Square. There were definitely tables of food set up around the edges for people to eat, but it looked like the main attraction was going to happen on the stage set right in the center of attention. I looked over at Cloud again, having been distracted by the sight. He was obviously drawn in as well.

"Didn't expect this many people," I said, finally. Cloud didn't have a chance to respond before we were greeted by a man in a suit.

"Are you two a couple tonight?" he said, taking a look at his clipboard and then leaning in to squint at Cloud through his shades.

"No, no," I shook my head. "We're just here for the..." My sentence was cut short as another man in a suit gave us a shout. He was hobbling up the stairs, obviously not a greeter. His clothing and hair told me he was the director of the play before he even spoke.

"Good lord," he said panting. "You're late! We're you trying to give me a hernia!" His words looked to be directed at Cloud, though he hadn't yet recovered the strength to look up from his feet.

"E-excuse me?" Cloud took a step back from the man. "I think you're thinking of someone else." The panting director turned his gaze up to Cloud, ready to fight those words, but he noticed after a moment that Cloud was, in fact, _not_ the one he was thinking of.

"Good lord!" he exclaimed again. "You're not Monty!"

"No," Cloud agreed with him, "I'm not."

"Oh goodness." The man's face had turned red. "Our knight hasn't shown up, and the play is supposed to begin any minute!" He looked like he was either going to faint or have a breakdown, but then he stopped short and a new light came across his face. "Wait..." He looked back to Cloud with a grin. "Can you act, son?" Cloud looked very taken aback.

"A-act? No." He moved his arms in a dismissal. "No, I don't think so."

"Come on!" The director grabbed Cloud by the front of the shirt. "There's nothin' too it! I'll even give you Monty's cut of the pay!"

"I could act," I said plainly, actually rather put down that the man hadn't offered me to play the part. He took a long look at me, up and down, and then shook his head vigorously.

"No," he said straight out. "That wouldn't do. Monty's a small guy. You'd never fit in his costume." That comment didn't bother me, but Cloud got a look over his face. "Come on, buddy!" the director continued to plead. "The play's ruined without ya!" Looking unsure of himself, Cloud glanced over at me.

"Go for it," I told him with a smile. "Take a chance. Could be fun, right?"

"But..." Cloud frowned, but the director took my approval as a 'yes'.

"Great!" He jumped up. "Excellent! Let's get you down to the back! Wendy will tell you what to do!" Cloud disappeared down the stairs with the director, and the greeter welcomed me in. Despite the amount of people, it wasn't too difficult to find a seat. I wondered exactly what they were putting Cloud through in the back. I hoped that he wasn't going to hate me for telling him he should do that. I also wondered about what exactly they planned on him doing without a script. As the lights faded and the sound of the crowd died down, I supposed that I'd just have to watch and find out.

"Oh," the narrator began as the curtains opened on a medieval backdrop. "It was a happy day that blinded the people to a dark cloud approaching from beyond." There was a pause and the stage darkened a bit. "And now our beautiful Kingdom weeps for the fair Princess Rosa was taken by the Evil Dragon King, Valvados!" There was another pause. "Now, the Kingdom's chivalrous Knight finds one, a Hero by the name of Alfred, to speak to the King about this tragedy." As the voice spoke, a man dressed as a King spun onto the stage from the right, and a man with a sword spun on from the left. Shortly afterward, a Knight stepped onto the stage and walked over to the King.

"Y-your majesty," the Knight, Cloud, said almost under his breath. Luckily he had been tagged with a microphone on his costume. "This is... the Hero, Alfred." He gestured to the man with the sword. "Here to save the princess..." Cloud definitely seemed embarrassed to be up on stage, but I had to give him credit just for doing it, even if it _was_ somewhat forced.

"Oh Hero!" the King exclaimed with far too much drama behind his voice. "Hero Alfred. I offer you the services of my best men. One, our chivalrous Knight! To aid you in battle! Two..." A man, or perhaps a woman wearing a fake beard, spun onto the stage. "My most gifted Magician! To teach you the wisdom and tactics you will need to survive!"

"Oh no!" the Magician yelled, and she was definitely a girl. "It is Valvados, approaching!" A roaring sound played over the speakers as someone in a large, green dragon costume stomped out onto the stage.

"Oh no!" cried the King. "Stop him, chivalrous Knight!" Cloud just stood there for a moment, but upon receiving a nudge from the magician, he walked forward and raised his sword at Valvados. Another roaring sound came from the speakers, and a red cloth shot from the dragon's mouth at the Knight. Cloud's character fell to the ground and the dragon laughed.

"I have killed your chivalrous Knight!" Valvados bellowed as the king struck a dramatic pose. "And tomorrow, I will return to kill the rest of you!" He laughed again and the roar was played for a third time as he stomped off the stage.

The play went on for a little while. Cloud remained laying on the floor where he had fallen while the other characters interacted. It wasn't until later on in the play that he got to move again. The Evil Dragon King, Valvados was found out to be a princess under a terrible curse. With the Magician's help, Alfred got rid of the curse and saved Princess Rosa, along with the cursed Princess Mary. It turned out that Mary had been the Knight's fiance before she was cursed, and in a moment of sweet cliché, she kissed him and revived him from the dead. The curtains closed with some words from the narrator, and the audience rose in applause. I could only laugh to myself over the whole thing, but goofy or not, I kind of enjoyed it.

I sat in my seat, waiting for Cloud. The majority of the people had filed out of the Square by the time that Cloud appeared from a door to backstage. He walked over and joined me on a seat next to mine, not saying anything.

"Hey," I said after a minute of silence. "If it helps, I think you were better than the overacting King." Cloud just laughed, but the laugh was followed with a smile, and I knew that he was fine. "I saved you a sandwich," I said, handing over a turkey on rye that I grabbed before the show. "They were just about out when I got there."

"Thanks." Cloud accepted the sandwich from me, biting into it immediately. We had come here to eat in the first place, after all.

"Didn't see the end coming," I laughed, leaning back as Cloud ate. "The Dragon was a princess, huh?" I watched him take another bite of his sandwich, and smiled. "I thought that the Magician was going to end up being a girl in disguise." To that, Cloud laughed between bites. He finally took a break from his sandwich to smirk up at me.

"You really think that was entertaining?" he pressed me.

"Most definitely," I assured him with just a touch of sarcasm.

"Well I'm glad that _you_ enjoyed yourself," he laughed again, taking another bite. Whether or not he would admit it, I could tell that he enjoyed it on some level.

Walking out of the square, I had the strangest thought on my mind. I tossed my arms up, interlocking my fingers behind my head. I often walked that way when I was feeling comfortable, or when I wanted to. Cloud was walking silently next to me. It looked like he was watching something in the sky, but I had something else on my mind.

"So," I said, after a moment, "at least you got a kiss out of the play, huh?" Cloud broke his attention on the sky and stared at me as we walked.

"Hmm." He looked like he was considering what I said. "Well they _did_ pay me." He shrugged. "And the kiss was just on the helmet of my costume."

"Oh really?" I said, sounding indignant. "The things you think you're paying for nowadays."

"You didn't pay to get in," Cloud huffed, smiling and turning his eyes forward as he walked. I laughed. I was joking around, but somehow I _did_ feel better about something. I was just having a hard time figuring out what.

"So," I started again. "Back to the hotel?" It was later than I figured most things would be open. Cloud turned his gaze back to the sky with a smile, and then finally to me.

"There's one last thing I'd like to do first," he decided, tugging my arm for a moment before walking ahead to lead the way again. I wasn't quite sure where Cloud was leading me. There were significantly less people out at this time, and the park seemed a lot more peaceful. Towards the end of following Cloud, I almost had to jog to keep up with him. We finally arrived at a place marked by a sign; Round Square. It was the gondola station. Not the one to leave the park, but the one for taking a tour and seeing the sights. It must have been what Cloud was watching in the sky. We approached the man behind the booth, and he turned to us with a smile.

"Just in time," he said, stepping out of the booth and up to the door of a blue gondola. "Last ride of the night."

"How much?" Cloud asked, going for his money.

"Don't worry about it," he smiled, opening the door for us. "Last one's free. Just sit back and enjoy."

"Thanks," Cloud smiled back as he climbed on board. I followed and took a seat opposite to Cloud's, so that we could both see out the same window. It was only a moment before the ride started up, gently lifting us into the air. It was a very relaxing drift, and I sat back into the cushioned seat with a sigh. The gondola passed through a group of free floating red balloons, and Cloud watched them drift up into the air.

"You really want to be in SOLDIER, huh?" I said, not really thinking about my words. Cloud continued to stare out the window.

"You got that from my journals?" he asked after a silence.

"Yeah..." I admitted softly. "Sorry."

"It's all right," he smiled, still admiring the view. "Yes I do. Ever since I was a kid."

"Yeah?" The lights below were mesmerizing.

"Hmm," Cloud responded, and it sounded like a 'yeah'. We watched out the window in silence for a few minutes. Fireworks were going off below us. I had never seen fireworks from above before, and all I could do was wonder whether or not Cloud had ever seen them at all. "I told everyone at home that I'd become a hero in SOLDIER," he continued, breaking the silence. "Sephiroth used to be my biggest idol."

"Used to?" I echoed, and Cloud nodded.

"Yeah," he said, blinking slowly down at the search lights near Chocobo Square. "My idol now, I guess..." He left off there for a minute, and then glanced at me for the slightest of moments. "Well," he continued, "I guess that would be you." I supposed that I was ready to hear him say that, but it still hit me like a surprise. I turned my view away from Cloud to stare out the window too.

"It's pretty, isn't it?" I said, taking it all in. Cloud responded with another 'hmm'. We watched in silence for the rest of the ride. I could feel myself growing tired, but the starlight turned it into a pleasant feeling. I almost wondered whether Cloud had actually fallen asleep, because he was completely quiet. I couldn't get myself to look at him until we arrived back at the station. Cloud stepped out first, so he was obviously awake, and I followed him. The man in the booth gave us a final smile and said 'goodnight' as we left the Square. While we were walking, Cloud's sauntering turned into stopping, and he turned around to face me. My tired reflexes almost caused me to walk right into him, but instead, I stopped close in front of him.

"Calling it a night?" Cloud asked, looking directly at my eyes. I didn't think there was any question. All the attractions were probably closed, with the exception of a few clubs, but I thought that we were too tired for that.

"Yeah," I said, almost yawning. "I think so." That was the first time that Cloud had actually stared me in the eyes since we had gotten on the gondola, and the stare seemed to be lasting. Cloud had already gotten his answer, but he continued to look at me like he hadn't. I felt the pull of my tired muscles, and my reflexes still wanted me to move in the direction towards him. I swallowed, because I noticed that _he_ swallowed, and the longer we stood there, the less I could think. There was something there. Something unfinished. I leaned forward, closer to him, almost involuntarily.

"Zack?" he said it the same way he had before we got interrupted by the play. My mouth felt dry, and Cloud raised his hand a little from next to his hip. "I feel..." Cloud continued to stare at me, looking like his mind had gone as blank as mine. "I feel kind of sick," he said, cupping his hand over his stomach. I felt myself inhale as I pulled back. I smiled at him.

"Don't worry," I assured him, pulling his arm over my shoulder so that I could help him walk, "the hotel isn't far."

"I don't need..." Cloud started to protest, but his stomach stopped him as we began to walk.

"It's okay," I said, ignoring my own fatigue. "It's not like there's anyone here to impress. I've got you." He stayed silent after that. Despite his stomach, he looked content the entire way as we made it back to the hotel and stepped into our room. Cloud broke from me to saunter over and drop into his own bed. He was silent for a minute, but as I went to turn out the light, he looked up.

"Zack?" he said again. "Thanks." I didn't bother to ask him what he was thanking me for. I just smiled in return, and he shut his eyes, looking happy to fall asleep in his boots. With a click, the light was off, and I got into my own bed.

I could only wonder what tomorrow would bring.


	14. A SOLDIER's Innocence Part 7

**Cloud**

_X day/X month/X year - Time: 3:22pm,_

_ I could not sleep last night..._

I held the pencil in my hand, gently touching the tip to the paper. I could not sleep last night. That was all I had. Honestly, I hadn't been able to think straight either. Nor write, apparently. It was like the entire previous night had been a dream, except it wasn't a dream, which was what was making me feel so uneasy. There was something obviously different about that night. Zack and I had hung out before, more or less. Though it felt like the term 'hanging out' was inappropriate for a SOLDIER and an infantryman, we _had_ hung out. It was never like that night though. There was something different, something indescribable, and it was hard to wrap my mind around it. It was almost like we had passed over some kind of invisible barrier into a zone where being friendly felt less natural, and where we would double-think all of our actions, and all of the other person's actions. A smile here, and a tap on the shoulder there. Those things shouldn't feel complicated, but they did.

It wasn't like I hadn't had fun. I _did_, but that was another thing. What had happened last night was that I had been forced into a play, and had to pretend to be dead on a stage for a half-hour, and then I got sick on the gondola ride. Somehow, however, I probably had the most fun I've had in a long time, because after the play, Zack was there with a sandwich for me. During the gondola ride, Zack was there to watch the lights with me, and afterward when I got sick, he was there to carry me back to the hotel. Zack carried me back to the hotel. I couldn't believe that that happened. There I was, trying to prove myself to be more than some grunt, and I got sick on an amusement park ride and had to be carried back.

I flopped down on the bed I had been sitting on. Zack had been gone the whole morning, which didn't help with the circles my mind was spinning in. He'd gotten a call early in the morning from one of the Turks. They didn't tell him what they wanted to see him about, and they asked me to stay here, so I didn't find out. Instead, I had just been left to sit in the room for hours with my own thoughts. I figured at the time that that was the thing I would've wanted least, but that was only until there was a knock at the hotel room door. Before I even had the chance to stand up to get it, the door came open, and it had been locked. Leaning against the door frame was a thin, red-headed man with a smirk. Behind him was a tall man with a shaved head and sunglasses. They were both wearing the suits typical of Turks.

"What's up?" the red-haired man nodded at me before stepping in. The tall guy followed. "We're just here to have a little chat," he continued. "Nothing big. Just checking up." I already knew that the Turks were never assigned to something that wasn't big, so I just stared, ready for what would come next. The man sat down in front of me, with the same smirk. "I'm Reno."

"Cloud Strife," I said, still keeping an eye on him, "sir."

"Well, Cloud," Reno said, brushing off his seemingly clean coat, "have you been enjoying Gold Saucer?" The other man in the back just picked up and examined things around the room while Reno talked. I figured that his entire point was to be intimidating, and honestly, I had always _been_ intimidated by the Turks, but the small talk was already bothering me.

"I'm sorry, sir," I said after watching him for a moment, "but why are you here?" The man in the back turned to look at me, and I could just picture him cracking his knuckles and threatening me to say that I've had a very nice time. Reno's smile lessened, but didn't disappear.

"Okay," he said, leaning forward to look at me closer, "I can tell you're not a big chatter, so I'll just get to the point." I worried about what the point actually was. "How's Zack been?" I thought for a minute that he was still small talking, and I stayed silent until he continued. "Any strange behavior, or odd conversations?" That's when it hit me. The Turks had been sent to check up on Zack and make sure that he wasn't thinking of deserting. I felt worried and angry about this at the same time.

"He's fine," I said, not really knowing what else to say. "I've never seen him at an amusement park before. He's enjoying himself." Reno looked dissatisfied.

"I think you know what I'm asking." He sat up straight. "Let's not pretend that this mass-desertion thing is a secret. Has Zack said anything to indicate a damper in his loyalty to Shinra?"

"No, sir," I said straight out. "He's been completely committed to the mission." I wished I had left it at that, instead of going on to say what I did. "Besides, Genesis is gone, isn't he?" Reno just gave me a long cold stare in return. It wasn't taken lightly for an infantryman to know or speak about the things that Shinra would like to keep quiet. I tensed under the stare, but finally Reno's mouth curled into another smirk.

"Guess I'll be taking off then," he said, standing and straightening his coat. "It's good to hear that Zack's committed." He walked for the door and then stopped halfway there, continuing to talk without even looking back. "But if Zack had said something to indicate otherwise, then you would be in a much better position if you told us." He stood there for a moment, and after my silence, he walked out the door. The tall man followed, nodding at me before shutting the door behind him.

A short while later, Zack reentered the room, looking as upbeat as usual. I wasn't sure whether or not I should mention Reno's visit, so I stayed quiet for the moment. Zack sat on the edge of the same bed as me and stretched. Immediately, all the things that I had been thinking about earlier flooded back to me. He turned his head to flash me a smile.

"Sorry for making you wait," he said. "Tseng wanted to check up on things." He paused for a long moment. "It seemed kind of strange. He didn't really do much. Just talked to me a little about some of the reactors." I really wanted to say something about the Turks. It didn't seem like they had a right to be suspecting Zack behind his back. Then again, the Turks seemed like the kind of people that would find out that you said something, even if you thought you were alone. As an infantryman, I would be worried about more than just my job if I was talking to Zack about anything involving desertion. He stared at me for a long minute. He didn't seem to be waiting for anything, or expecting anything. He just seemed to be looking at me. Finally, after a good deal of silence, he said, "Cloud? Is something on your mind?" There was a lot on my mind. I was probably looking confused or unhappy about not knowing what to say, but I knew that it wouldn't help if I just stayed silent. So I lied.

"No," I said, rolling my shoulders back and standing up off the bed. "Just tired." His mouth twisted in consideration, and probably disbelief. He stood up as well, and placed a warm hand on my shoulder.

"There's somewhere I'd like to show you," he said, tightening his grip on my shoulder before releasing it and walking for the door. "You need to get out today, anyway." I knew he was right.

"Yeah," I agreed. "I guess I could use some fresh air." Zack led me out of the room and away from the hotel. We ended up in one of the elevators, traveling up to Chocobo Square, but when we got there, we didn't head for the Square. Instead, we took a walk around the elevator to a set of stairs that would take us up even further than the elevator could go. When we reached the top, we were on a circular platform with a railing guarding the sides. There were only a couple of people there, and they were all gazing off the side. "Where are we?" I asked.

"This is Gold Saucer's peak," he said with a smile. "The highest point in the park. It's where me and Tseng met." I took in the site as I approached one of the railings to stare off the side. Zack walked up beside me. "I know you like the view," he said, staring off with me, "and this way you won't get sick." I didn't feel like responding after the last part, but the view _was_ very nice. It wasn't too often that I got to look down on everything without being in a vehicle that would make me sick. From that height, even the desert surrounding the park looked small and insignificant. Zack put his hand down on the railing next to mine, and it broke me out of my wonder. There it was again. That feeling; the tension that shouldn't have been there. "Hey," Zack gave me a look, "are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I said, looking away from his hand. "Sorry for yesterday, and... getting sick."

"Hey, I had fun yesterday." He stared at me and tried to get me to stare back. I continued to look off the side. "I'm sorry you got sick too, but you don't need to apologize for it."

"I'm always getting sick," I said. I wasn't exactly sure why I was admitting this. Maybe I just figured that there was no way I could hide it. "It doesn't seem to matter what I'm riding in."

"Don't give into it." Zack turned to me, full of energy. "The key is to control your breathing."

"My breathing?" I said, glancing at him.

"Yeah." He nodded. "Most people start to hold their breath more when they're nauseous, even without thinking about it, but it's actually a lot better to let yourself breathe." He took an example inhale and then exhaled. "See? Come on." He turned me to face him.

"No," I laughed a little. "I'm not going to practice breathing."

"Aw, come on!" he said, and then demonstrated breathing again. I shook my head, ashamed that I was going to do that, and joined him in his next round of breathing. Zack shook his head. "No. You need good breaths." He walked closer and took my hand, holding it against my stomach. "Use your chest to breathe too. Most people only use their stomachs, but if you do some chest breaths, it will loosen up your chest and make it easier to breathe altogether." He gave me another example. "It helps with exercising too." I took a long inhale, but my breath was shaky. Zack kept his hand clasped over mine on my stomach while I breathed again. It was hard to focus on the breathing as my thoughts swirled in my head. I was close to Zack again, just like last night. He was staring at my eyes again, and I felt myself starting to hold my breath like I did then. We were so close to each other, just staring, and it felt unfinished. Last night felt unfinished. I could tell that he felt my breath halt. His look softened, and his eyes jerked back and forth between mine. He opened his mouth, and I don't know what he would have said if he weren't interrupted. A small but constant beeping sound caught both of our attentions. We didn't break our stare for a moment, but then reality hit us.

"The receptors!" I said, and Zack snapped into a new awareness. We gave each other a final look, and Zack nodded to signal that we were on our way. Dashing down the stairs to the peak, my thoughts all fell into the background and returned to the initial tension I felt when we first got to Gold Saucer. I was on a mission meant for a SOLDIER first class, and it had come time to have a conflict. I didn't know quite what to expect, but I worried that if I _didn't_ give it more than my best, I might not make it out. Our next destination was Battle Square.


	15. A SOLDIER's Innocence Part 8

**Zack**

This was it. Someone was attempting to steal the fake huge materia. It figured that it had to happen when Cloud and I were at the highest point in the park, but at least the staff of the hotel were informed as well, and they had a couple of Shinra troops hold our weapons ready as we passed by. Grabbing the weapons, I continued to dash down through the park on my way to Battle Square. I slid down the railing to a staircase, and looked back behind me for Cloud. There had been a couple of times in my rush that it hit me that I might have been going too fast. That I might have left Cloud behind. All of those times, including then at the staircase, I was wrong and Cloud was right behind me. He didn't fail to impress. I nodded at him before starting to run again.

This would be a delicate balance. I wasn't supposed to just take down the thieves in the halls. I was supposed to follow them to their base of operations, but if I wasn't right on top of them when they got there, they could get away. The receptors we were given showed that the materia was moving out of Battle Square, but it was moving a lot faster than I expected, and in our direction. I threw my arm out to the side to signal Cloud to stop running. I knew that if we encountered the thieves now, they wouldn't head back to their base and blow the cover of the others. I tried to pull Cloud to the side to hide from sight, but it was too late. What I expected to see come around the corner was far from the truth.

A massive four legged, horned beast burst into the room, tearing down a piece of the wall as it came. It was a behemoth, a very aggressive monster that I had only ever had to face in Shinra simulations, and there was the huge materia, locked up in a cage on a chain around its neck. All the people in the area panicked and ran every which way, riling the beast up even more. I was still holding onto Cloud's arm from when we tried to hide, and I could feel him take a step back.

"What is that thing?" He took his arm back, readying his gun. I just stared at it, and it took me longer to respond than I meant it to. I readied my sword as well, and the creature stopped it's frenzy and turned it's gaze on us.

"It's a behemoth," I answered, locking eyes with the beast. "A trained one." I knew a normal monster wouldn't single us out for preparing to fight. The Wutai warriors I had fought in the past had trained certain monsters, but never anything as powerful and feral as a behemoth. I started to suspect that these weren't the thieves we were hoping to catch. The monster turned it's body to us, it's claws scratching at the ground, and I knew that it was only a matter of who made the first move. I also knew that for the vast majority of Shinra infantrymen, an encounter with a behemoth meant almost certain death. I glanced over my shoulder at Cloud while still keeping the behemoth in my sight. "You should stay back," I warned him. "I'm trained against these things."

"I want to help," he said firmly, swallowing back his fear. "I've got a gun. I'll just keep a little distance." A behemoth can cover a good distance in only a few seconds, but I knew that Cloud wasn't going to back down. I'd just have to keep its attention on me.

"Alright," I said, turning my focus back to the monster. It was scraping its paw across the ground, preparing for a charge. "Good luck." On that note, I ran right at the behemoth before it had the chance to charge. It let out a loud below, lifted a paw, claws extended, and swung at me with enough power to kill a normal person. I veered to the right, ducking the attack and dragging my sword across the monster's side. A behemoth's skin is tough, but a pained roar let me know that I did some damage. Unfortunately, hurting one of those things only made them want to hurt me more. It threw its tail at me as I ran, knocking my feet out from under me, and skidding me about ten feet across the ground. I rolled over immediately, despite the pain, knowing that it wouldn't waste the opportunity to kill me while I was on my stomach. Rolling over made me dodge its attempt to crush me, but I was still on the ground. It launched its head forward and dragged its horns along the ground to skewer me. I blocked with my sword, and its horns lifted me into the air, causing me to roll down its head and onto it's back. Quickly, I stood up and stabbed my blade down into it, but it wasn't a killing blow, and the beast reared back in pain, throwing me across the room into a wall.

I fell to the ground, doing my best to recover before another attack. When I looked up, I saw that the behemoth was being distracted by a round of bullets from Cloud's gun. A number of the bullets were good hits, and the creature growled in pain and started charging towards him. I leaped to my feet to the best of my ability and sprinted in their direction. I knew, however, that I wouldn't make it in time to prevent that attack. The behemoth hurled its horned head at Cloud, and for a second, I couldn't tell what happened. Cloud had apparently blocked with his gun, which was now in pieces, and he was thrown to the ground. In desperation, I pulled out one of the materias I'd gotten from Shinra. I usually preferred to fight with my sword, but I still wouldn't get to the behemoth fast enough to stop it's next attack, and this time Cloud had nothing to block with. I held the materia forward, and it released a cold blast that formed into an ice cluster right in front of the creatures face. The cluster burst, sending shards of razor sharp ice flying at the monster, cutting its face. Cloud got away from the behemoth as it yowled and rubbed an arm against its face to clear away the ice. Its eyes refocused just in time to see me lunge my sword under its head and into its stomach, where the skin wasn't quite as tough. It's final below was louder than the others, and it reared back onto two feet before collapsing like a tower on the ground next to me.

I looked to Cloud first, after I was sure the monster was dead. He was okay, but definitely shaken up, and it looked like he was still worried that the thing would get back up. I broke open the cage around the behemoths neck and recovered the huge materia, but as I lifted it up to examine it, a bullet struck me in the arm and the materia went sliding across the floor. I made a pained noise and grabbed my arm, looking for the one responsible. And there he was. One black wing lowered the man's feat to the ground, and he reached down to take the materia.

"Genesis," I said, almost as a grunt, still grasping my arm. Genesis lifted the huge materia into the air, staring at it intently.

"Hmm..." he said, frowning. A fire grew around the materia in his hand. "So it's a fake." After those words, the materia smashed into pieces and he turned his eyes to me. "What are you doing?" He shook his head slowly and brushed his hair out of his face. "Letting Shinra use you as a worm to catch the fish?"

"I don't want to hear it!" I yelled, only able to think about losing Angeal and all of the paranoia Genesis placed on SOLDIER. "What are you doing here? What are you actually trying to accomplish?" Genesis cocked his head slowly.

"It's simply another arc in the story," he said. His wing beat a single time, and he was propelled high up into the air to look down on me from above. "And it sounds like you don't want to be a part of it." He flew off, and I took notice of the one responsible for the bullet. It was a clone of Genesis, armed with a bladed gun. He, and several other clones stepped out into the area to surround us. Cloud, weaponless, looked over to me to make my move. We had nowhere to run to, so I did the only thing I could. I charged. I was not too bad at dodging bullets when I was ready for them, so I managed to make it to one of the clones without being hit. I struck him a few times with my blade, and after dodging a kick and another bullet, I finished him, and caught his gunblade as it flew through the air. I used my materia to shoot another cluster of ice at a clone that was about to attack Cloud.

"Hey!" I yelled to get Cloud's attention, and tossed him the weapon that I collected from the enemy. As soon as his hand was on the gun, Cloud was back in the fight, and it wasn't long until he had shot down a few of the clones. Meanwhile, I had taken out the group of enemies on my side, and headed over to fight the ones near Cloud. Right after dispatching one of the clones, another one tried to stab me in the back, but Cloud landed a powerful attack with the blade on his gun and took him out, giving me a smile. We thought that was the last of them, but two more groups emerged from opposite sides of us, lining up like firing squads. Cloud and I stood back to back, readying our weapons, but those odds didn't look good in our current conditions. "Sorry," I said back to him, "for getting you involved in this."

"I wouldn't have missed this for anything," Cloud responded. "It's been my dream to do this." Cloud really wanted to be in SOLDIER. He continued to impress me, but right then I wasn't sure that we'd make it out of there. The clones all readied their guns to fire, and just before they did, a powerful spray of bullets rained down from above, dropping the firing squads in only seconds. After shielding my eyes from bullet shells, I looked up to see Tseng standing in the doorway of one of Shinra's assault helicopters. The clones were gone, and the helicopter lowered down to pick us up.

"Tseng!" I cheered, throwing my not-shot arm into the air. "Yeah! Great timing!" I stepped up to the helicopter door with Cloud. "I mean, it would've been helpful against the behemoth earlier, but..."

"Just get on," Tseng said, smiling ever so slightly. "We'll get someone to tend to your wounds." He grabbed my arm and helped me on board, and then helped Cloud. Cloud smiled at me, and I smiled back before laying down across a few unoccupied seats, completely exhausted. It seemed to me at that time that those smiles were more than just smiles. They were a recognition of each other. A new-found respect that could only come from being there to save each other's lives, and we had. As we took off into the air, I peeked over and saw Cloud taking deep breaths with his chest. I smiled again to myself. Cloud was impressive. He really _was_ giving it more than his best.

And so we flew off, away from Gold Saucer and into the next arc of our own story.


	16. A SOLDIER's Touch Part 1

**Cloud**

Something had changed between me and Zack. It was no longer like we had passed through a barrier into a state of uneasiness and too much thinking, but it was like we had moved on past _that_. Something pushed us forward, and clicked us into the right spot. I didn't know if it was the helicopter ride where we exchanged looks and it meant something. I didn't know if it was the battle we fought together, where he saved my life, and I saved his. It may have even been when he took me to Gold Saucer's peak, put his hand on my chest, and just told me to breathe. Whatever it was, something had changed, and looking at each other, being close together, and exchanging smiles were all easy again. The trip to Gold Saucer changed a lot more than I thought it would. I felt closer to Zack, I had some fun for the first time in a while, and for once in my life I got to feel like a SOLDIER, instead of an infantryman. It was almost frightening to be back. I knew that no matter how confident I had felt during that mission, my next one would be more grunt work. I would have to return to the barracks, return to the same people, the same uniform, the same yelling captains as before. I would just be another helmet on the headcount again.

I looked to Zack again. We were sitting in the medical wing of the Shinra building, and he was having a large bandage wrapped around his arm where he was shot. It had apparently not been the first time he'd been shot. He was shirtless for his examination, and I noticed, even from across the room, a number of small scars from various battle injuries. They were mostly healed. I'd heard that the infused mako helped with that. The thought of battle injuries made Zack seem older, and more mature. I'd almost gotten used to the Zack that was excited about arcade games, or asking me to race him in the pool. He was different during battle. I guess he would have to be. He was really the perfect model for a SOLDIER. I couldn't help but wonder if that could ever be me. There had been times in the past that I would wish I _were_ Zack, but right then, all I could do was wish I could stay close to him. I knew, however, that as soon as we were finished in that room, as soon as we went our separate directions down the hall, it would be like it had been before, and I would go months before even seeing him again. Maybe a year before being on another mission with him. Infantry wasn't the place for me, but I was stuck.

"We'll be right with you," a nurse said to me, bringing some extra gauze over to Zack. I didn't think he was even bleeding anymore, but SOLDIER or not, a bullet wound was always treated first. I didn't mind. I was used to not getting a whole lot of medical attention. As an infantryman, when I came in injured, I was usually arriving with several other injured bodies that needed at least as much help as I did. Right then, my only injuries were some bruises, one cut on my arm, and a sprained ankle. Zack had done a pretty good job at keeping me from harm. I couldn't help but to be proud that I had prevented Zack from needing a bandage on his back, but I knew that if he had been any later to take down a certain few Genesis copies and I had taken a bullet, I wouldn't be handling it as well as he was. After a few minutes, the doctor came to examine me. Zack walked over a second later, pulling his shirt down over his stomach.

"How're you feeling?" he asked, sounding kind of tired. That question was harder to answer than it should have been. I was tired, like him. I felt somewhat disheartened by the reality of my rank. I wanted to stay close to him, like we had been on that night after the gondola, but I couldn't.

"I'm okay," I said, making myself smile. "The breathing actually kind of worked." It was true that I'd barely felt nauseous the entire ride over. Zack put his hand on my bare shoulder.

"Careful, Zack," the doctor said, but left his hand alone. "I haven't checked out all the places he could be injured." Zack just smiled at me like he normally did.

"I have to go report," he said, and gently tapped my arm before taking a step back. "I'll check on you later." I nodded at him, and he left. I honestly didn't expect him to check on me later. I was lost in the fact that I was heading back into my routine, and didn't even think about the fact that he was Zack, and he cared more than I've ever known a first class to care. That was exactly the kind of SOLDIER I wanted to be. I winced as the doctor cleaned the cut on my arm.

"How do you know Zack?" the doctor asked, not looking up from the cut. It took me a second to register the question.

"What do you mean?" I asked, confused. Most people knew Zack. He was one of the only first class SOLDIERs still in Shinra. Even Genesis had been pronounced 'killed in action'. The doctor glanced up at me and then back down to continue cleaning the cut.

"Well, it's impressive," she responded. "I think that you're the first infantryman that I've seen who's gone one on one on a mission with a SOLDIER." She did a final dab at my cut and took out a roll of medical tape to start bandaging it up. "And he's a first class."

"Really?" I said, watching her tape. I was the first infantryman I knew to do that as well. I wanted to tell her it was because we were friends, but how would that have sounded? I didn't know if Zack would call us friends. Were we friends?

"You'd better return to the barracks and rest up," the doctor said, finishing the bandages. "The rest of your squad returned yesterday, and the company will probably be giving more missions out soon." I was sure that by 'my squad' she meant the infantrymen who I was sent to the reactor with. It still felt strange to be returning to them after spending a few days with Zack, but I knew it was going to happen, so I took her advice and headed back to the barracks.

Passing through the halls of the Shinra building was reminiscent of the monotony I had to face every day on my job. I always had to get up early, rush to get something to eat before making it to my squad, stand in line for a headcount, and then get shipped off to continue the same fights in the war we had going against Wutai. Once in a while I would get lucky enough to have something more exciting happen, but I had been working for Shinra for years, and had only ever had four missions with Zack, and during two of them I barely saw him. When I walked onto the infantry floor of the building, I got a small applause from a group of men sitting around in the seats. One of them was Dallert, and he stood up to greet me.

"There he is!" Dallert said and gave me a strong pat on the back before throwing his arm over my shoulder. "It took us a while to find out where you'd disappeared to." He laughed. "I practically had my head chewed off by the captain when I asked."

"So how was it?" another guy said, standing as well. "Working with Zack?"

"Yeah," added another. "We heard you took down a behemoth!"

I was taken in by the crowd, making stories out of the one battle that I had. We talked for a while, and the funny thing was that they seemed a lot more interested in hearing what _I_ did rather than what Zack did. I hadn't actually taken down the behemoth myself, just survived an attack, but even when I told them that, they treated it like I _had_. I supposed that they were in sort of the same situation that I was. They were infantrymen too, and infantrymen didn't stick out too often. If the time came where an infantryman did something remarkable, they would absorb it and admire it, even if it had nothing to do with them. It was because it gave them hope, and I supposed it gave me hope as well. Even then, however, I didn't feel separated from the numbers. I felt like I was a tan rock among brown ones. I may have stood out then, but I would end up being shuffled back into the crowd in time.

_And there were my fifteen minutes of fame._ I finished up in my journal. I had moved back to my room after the stories, and my bunk-mate wasn't there.

_I gave it more than my best..._ I wrote, but I was interrupted when there was a knock at the door. I closed the journal in my hands and stood from the bed. I didn't think the door was locked, but part of me hoped to open it and see Zack. When I did open the door, however, it wasn't what I had expected, and I froze. Tseng stood in the doorway. It was probably the first time I had ever seen a Turk on the infantry floor, and he was the leader. Though I'd done nothing wrong, I couldn't help but worry as Tseng was as unreadable as a Turk should be, and I had no clue why he was there. I couldn't bring myself to say anything, and after a moment, he spoke first.

"You did well on the mission to Gold Saucer," he said, still expressionless. "I trust you left the Genesis detail out of your stories?"

"Yes," I said, still finding it hard to talk. "Yes, sir. I did."

"Is your condition well enough to head out on another assignment?" he asked.

"Yes sir," I said, hoping that he didn't mean at that moment, as I was still tired from the previous one. Either way, I wasn't going to say no to Tseng.

"Ten thirty am., tomorrow morning," he continued. "You will be joining Zack and Sephiroth on a mission to Nibelheim." I tensed up at more than one thing in that statement. Nibelheim was my hometown, and I hadn't been there since I joined Shinra. Also, I had never been on a mission with Sephiroth, nor had I even seen him up close. He had been my idol when I was a child, and he was the reason I joined Shinra in the first place. I had no idea why I was being assigned to a mission with the only two first class SOLDIERs until Tseng spoke again. He had turned to walked away, before looking back at me with a final note. "Zack recommended you," he said sternly, "and Sephiroth agreed that you'd be a good choice." he let the meaning behind those words sink in. "Come prepared, and don't be late." With that he was gone. I shut the door and sat back down on the bed to consider the whole situation. Maybe my life _wouldn't_ go back to how it was before. Maybe my trip to Gold Saucer would be the turning point, or maybe it would be this trip to my hometown. Even thinking like that, I still worried about going back home, and about having to face Tifa after telling her I'd make it into SOLDIER. I laid back in the bed and stared at the bunk above me. One way or another, I knew that tomorrow would be the start of something new.

I never could have guessed what was to come.


	17. A SOLDIER's Touch Part 2

**Zack**

I left Cloud in the medical wing of the Shinra building early in the day. I thought that going to report about my mission couldn't take too long, and that I could return to check up on him as I said I would. I expected to open the door to the briefing room and talk to Tseng. Despite being one of the Turks, he had been the one I'd reported to ever since Commander Lazard's disappearance. However, it wasn't Tseng who was waiting to chat when I opened the door. Standing there, as tall and intimidating as usual, was none other than Sephiroth, the only other first class. I had to take a moment to stare at him, because even though I had gotten rather used to the guy, it seemed nigh impossible to encounter him unexpectedly and not freeze in place. He had that sort of aura about him. Noticing my shock first thing, Sephiroth smiled a cocky smile at me, as if to say 'Hi to you, too'. Getting a grip of myself, I casually walked in, scratching at the back of my neck.

"Oh, hey Sephiroth. I'm reporting to you now?" I said, crossing my arms in front of me. "'cause that's a little demeaning, seeing as how we're the same rank." Sephiroth continued to smile and he narrowed his eyes a bit.

"I claim seniority," he responded, as though it was a valid excuse. "Tseng will be here shortly, but I'll be debriefing you on your next mission."

"My _next_ mission?" I repeated, confused. "What about the report on my last one?"

"There are new developments," he said plainly, but that was enough to catch my interest. Sephiroth had been a good friend of both Genesis before he deserted, and my old mentor, Angeal. I figured that if he was the one who wanted to talk to me about the mission, it most likely had something to do with one of them. "Legions of monsters have spawned near a regional mako reactor," he continued. "The workers have all gone missing. Local SOLDIER operatives have also vanished." He paused, noticing my interest. "The company is dispatching additional operatives to investigate the matter." I frowned at the word 'investigate'. That meant that they didn't know who was involved, and I became disheartened as Sephiroth finished. "You and I, that is."

"Roger that..." I said, still frowning and turning my attention away. Sephiroth remained quiet for a second, and I saw him tilt his head out of the corner of my eye.

"What's wrong?" he asked, somewhat out of character for him. I was surprised by this, and turned back to face him.

"Well, you know..." I said, considering my words on that touchy subject. "I thought you found something out about..." I considered again, knowing that Shinra didn't like anyone to speak of the deserters as anything other than killed in action, "that other matter." Sephiroth stared back, knowing well what I was talking about.

"The missing operatives were the ones tracking Lazard," he said sternly, emphasizing his point. "Also, they had reported a strange pod-like device in the area." I thought about the second statement. I thought back on my mission in Junon in the past, and how Shinra was attempting to find one of Hollander's machines before his escape. The machine was said to stop this process called 'degrading'. It was something that Genesis and Angeal were suffering from, and it would eventually eat away at their bodies. I finally looked up at Sephiroth, breaking from my thought.

"Is that... Hollander's...?" I questioned, stepping forward with a new interest. My movement seemed to inspire Sephiroth to step past me while he considered.

"Probably the same device that was stolen in Modeoheim."

"Meaning..." I couldn't help but press his thought process. If there was any way that Angeal may have been alive and involved, I wanted to know.

"Lazard, Hollander..." he continued.

"And Genesis?" I pushed again. This time, Sephiroth stayed silent. I mentioned Genesis' name with more contempt than I should have. It was difficult to remind myself that they were once friends. Finally, Sephiroth turned back to look at me.

"We'll have to go see them," he watched for my reaction. I nodded to emphasize my agreement.

"Mm... Let's go," I said, and Sephiroth smiled a bit.

"First, go to the SOLDIER floor," he gave me a look. It was the same look he had given me once upon a time when he mentioned the Midgar slums being in danger, urging me to go see Aerith. I wondered what it was about this time. I _was_ supposed to go check on Cloud, but he'd have no way of knowing that. "We'll depart as soon as you and the rest of the men are ready to go."

"Understood," I said, now hoping to catch Cloud while he was still in the medical wing. I started to jog out of the room, but Sephiroth said something that made me stop in my tracks.

"Our orders are to investigate the reactor." There was something off about his tone, like he wasn't just reiterating what he told me. I waited for him to continue, and slowly turned my head back to look at him. He was averting his eyes, staring down at the floor beside him. "They mention nothing of... old friends." Sephiroth was always serious. He was one of those people who looked like he was working even when he was enjoying himself, but there was something behind his expression now that held more determination than I had ever seen in him. After a pause he said, "Depending on what happens, I may abandon Shinra." This truth sent a chill down my spine as I watched him raise his chin as though he'd just had a revelation. All I could do was stare. Somehow, knowing that Angeal and Genesis were his friends, and knowing that Angeal was still my mentor, I couldn't really get myself to disagree with his decision. He looked back at me after a silence, gauging my reaction. "Until then," he continued after a moment, "I'll remain loyal to SOLDIER."

"I can't promise," I said, pausing mid sentence, "that we'll remain on the same side."

"Neither can I," he admitted, staring his meaning at me. "That's why I felt I should warn you now, in case that time came." The two of us just stared at each other for what felt like ages, and then Sephiroth's gaze shifted to the source of the footsteps I heard behind me. I turned around to watch Tseng enter the room.

"I take it that you've been debriefed," he said, stopping and staring at me. I assumed from this that he had been too late into the room to overhear Sephiroth.

"I have," I answered, trying not to sound preoccupied. "I'd like to bring Cloud along," I told him, and he stood in silence for a moment before responding.

"Again?" he asked, expressionless. "He doesn't recover as quickly as a SOLDIER, Zack."

"He wasn't hurt bad from the last mission," I said in return, and then I was startled by Sephiroth's input.

"I agree," Sephiroth said, walking closer. "That man has worked with Zack several times, and mostly at reactors like this one. I think he'd be a good choice." He turned his eyes from Tseng to me, letting me know that he was doing me a favor. "We'll give him until tomorrow morning to recover," he added. "We want everyone to be in top shape, just in case."

"Just in case," I echoed, keeping my vision on Sephiroth in a silent understanding. Tseng sighed, obviously knowing that he couldn't turn our decision down.

"Alright," the Turk agreed. "We were going to send three infantrymen anyway. I'll inform Cloud in a bit."

"Thanks," I smiled, moving again for the door. "Catch you guys later!" I turned my walk back into a jog down the halls. I stopped by the medical wing and stared inside. Cloud was gone at this point, most likely back to his barracks. I supposed that he wouldn't mind if I showed up there to check up on him, and I really _did_ want to know how he was feeling. Maybe I'd ask him out for dinner while I was there in Midgar. I walked to the elevator, and just as my hand was about to touch the button to call it up, a ringing came from my pocket. Flipping open my cell phone, I saw that it was Aerith's number. "Hey, Aerith!" I said into the phone.

"You never called me back," she said simply, her words sounding half like disappointment and half like a grudge. I scratched the back of my neck with a grin, deciding how I'd respond to my forgetfulness.

"That's 'cause I'm busy!" I said, starting to run in place. "I'm actually in mid pursuit right now! I'll call you back!" I clicked the phone shut and laughed. I figured that Cloud would be around for a while, but my next visit to Midgar would have to wait until at least the end of this next mission. So, I decided to choose the ground floor as my destination, and made my way down to the sector five slums.

It was about mid-day when the train pulled into the slums, leaving quickly after I got off. I got the usual looks from people as I walked through the streets under Midgar's upper plate. Some of the looks were simply confusion at my presence, and some of them were scorn and contempt directed at Shinra as a whole. After a few minutes of walking, I noticed Aerith standing in the old playground she would frequent. Her back was facing me, and she was wheeling along a small flower wagon that I had once made for her. I sneaked up behind her and tapped her on the shoulder. She didn't even flinch, however, or even turn around.

"Hey Zack," she said, and I could tell she was smirking.

"Huh?" I said in confusion as she turned around. "You knew?"

"I could tell you were coming," she placed her hands together in front of her stomach. I gave her another confused look, scratching again behind my neck.

"How do you do that?" I asked, and she responded with a cutesy little shrug. I couldn't help but smile. "Sorry I didn't call you," I said, "but I was in town so I figured I'd stop by."

"Hm... The flower wagon is working." She looked back at it.

"Oh yeah?" I said, proud of myself. "Selling any flowers?" She nodded.

"Yup." She picked a flower out of her cart, touching the petals. "I'm gonna make the slums beautiful."

"Not just the slums," I suggested, taking the flower from her and pointing it up at the plate above. "I know a few places up top that could use a bit more color."

"Hm..." She seemed to consider this idea. "So how was your mission?"

"It went well," I said, thinking back on it. "Me and this other guy had some fun at Gold Saucer while it was quiet." She cocked her head as I talked.

"Other guy?"

"Yeah," I nodded. "He's a friend of mine. Cloud," I specified. "He's pretty fun. We played some games and bet on a chocobo race." I was reliving the events in my head as I told her.

"Sounds nice," she considered aloud, sitting down on a swing near her wagon.

"Yeah, he is," I continued, sitting on the swing next to hers and not even considering that she may have meant the park. "He's comfortable to be around. It was kind of hard to get him to ease out of feeling like he was on duty, but it was worth it 'cause I think he had a good time too. _And_ he started to smile more."

"The type of person that it's hard to make them laugh, but worth it when you do?" Aerith added to my list.

"Yeah," I nodded, staring off at the ground near my feet. It _was_ nice to make Cloud laugh. I smiled as I thought about it. Then I started to think about the night on the gondola. Being close to Cloud. Carrying him back to the hotel was comfortable too, but my mind was really focused on that moment where we just stared at each other. Thinking about stares, it took me a moment to notice Aerith staring at me. I had been silent for a while, and she was just staring intently with a smile spread across her face. "I should have brought him to meet you." I didn't know why I chose those words as my next ones. I had already been ignoring my company with Aerith for thoughts about Cloud, and my mind was still stuck on that closeness.

"Hm..." she hummed, still smiling at me. I wondered what was going through her head, but I was also very preoccupied with my own thoughts. That night. That staring. That closeness. I never took the time to really consider that moment close enough. I was tired, and he was tired, and the whole scene was too confusing for a passing thought. But now that I'd had a moment to really consider that closeness, that night... I'd...

"I have to go back," I said suddenly, "But I wanted to stop by before I left for my next mission." Aerith looked disappointed.

"So soon?" she asked as she stood from the swing.

"I'm sorry," I said, my mind still elsewhere. "I'll visit you as soon as I come back, okay?"

"Call me while you're there." Aerith insisted. "Maybe I'll write to you while you're busy?"

"That'd be nice," I said, walking backwards out of the playground so that I could watch her as I left. "I'll see you again soon." I stepped around the corner and jumped when I ended up face to face with Tseng. "Whoa! What're you doing here?"

"I followed you," he smiled slightly, "and I was curious how Aerith was doing."

"She's alright," I said, feeling bad for leaving as abruptly as I did. "Listen, the slums aren't still as dangerous as they have been, are they?" I knew that he would know the answer to that. Tseng had been assigned to watch Aerith. He had told me that she was part of an almost extinct race of people. He just gave me a long look and shook his head.

"Don't worry about Aerith," He assured me. "Protecting the subject is part of surveillance duty." I didn't particularly care for his wording, but it _did_ help that a Turk was looking after her.

"You're the only one I can depend on," I stressed the point to him. I took a final look at Aerith, and then I heard a sound I didn't think I'd ever hear. "Hey," I turned back to Tseng. "Why are you laughing?" He looked at me, and the smile he had from the laugh remained on his face. Tseng always had a way of communicating a point with very few words, but this time he didn't have to say anything. He knew I liked Aerith. I _did_ like Aerith, but at that moment I couldn't help but to think of Cloud instead. I knew then... I knew that I liked Cloud too. Walking away from the girl that I owed a date, to be with Cloud. I felt guilty, and confused. I liked Cloud. All the millions of things that those words meant to me were sinking in, and I lowered my head. After a moment, I returned my gaze to Tseng and stuck out my arm to point to him. "I'm counting on you!" I back-stepped a few times, and then turned to run back in the direction of the train station. Tseng said nothing.

I couldn't stop thinking about Cloud, and closeness. The thoughts stayed with me for the rest of that day, and even for the night. It was only early the next morning, when my new mission was practically on top of me, that I began to calm my thoughts and think about the job at hand. However, as ten thirty rolled around, I knew that I had to join up with the group, and with Cloud, and that all of the thoughts would come back. My elevator reached the infantry floor and the door opened with a ding. As I stepped into the halls and around the corner, I turned to the first infantryman I saw, standing there and looking somewhat disgruntled.

"What's up?" I said, finding it difficult to know how to act under my new realization.

"I'm having a little trouble rounding up the group..." he admitted, turning to me. I frowned, knowing that we were under a bit of a time crunch. We would have left the previous day if it wasn't for giving Cloud more time to heal.

"We're in a hurry, let's move it!" I tried to sound like a leader, but it almost came off as rude. My attention was still drawn to my thoughts, and it wasn't until that infantryman said one more thing that I got snapped out of it.

"Sir!" was what he said, standing straight, arms to his sides. It was the same awkward 'sir' that I had heard him say in the past.

"Wha–Cloud?" I realized, looking him in the face and pointing like an idiot. He smiled. "Together again, eh?" I shrugged, returning the smile. I was still confused about how to act, so I held my arm forward and bumped it with his. It was something I had seen friends in the infantry do, so Cloud followed it almost like an instinct. "All right!" I said, and he looked happy.

"Thanks," he said, actually looking a tad embarrassed by the gesture. "Hold on, I'll get everyone." He ran off into the barracks, and I watched him as he went. I didn't know if I was actually smiling, or just in my head, but working with Cloud just felt... right. He emerged a few minutes later, accompanied by two other infantrymen in helmets. Apparently it was easier to get them going when a SOLDIER was waiting on them. The three of them stood next to each other in a line, hands against their sides. I just walked up to them with a smile.

"You guys can ease up, y'know," I said, planting my hands on my hips, but they suddenly all tensed up even more. I followed their vision to where Sephiroth had just entered the room. Sephiroth approached slowly but steadily, and stopped right in front of the three men, eying them. There was a long silence and then I stepped over to him. "By the way," I started, realizing that I hadn't even been told our destination, "where are we going?" I noticed Cloud's sudden inhale as Sephiroth slowly turned his head to me and said:

"To Nibelheim."


	18. A SOLDIER's Touch Part 3

**Cloud**

"To Nibelheim," was the answer that Sephiroth gave Zack. Apparently, I had been informed of where we were going before _he_ was. That was a first, I thought, but maybe Tseng just knew that Nibelheim was my hometown, and that I'd need some time to let that sink in. It would be kind of creepy if he _did_, but not at all unlike him. I watched Zack's expression, and how he subtly turned his eyes to look at mine, but my focus was brought back to Sephiroth when he turned to face me and the other two men. It was nerve racking to be in Sephiroth's presence. He was my childhood idol, and a hero among SOLDIERs, and his stare was as hardened as that title might suggest. I did my best to take in the sight of him without actually locking eyes. "You were all debriefed on the investigation earlier this morning," he started, eying the three of us, "but we haven't chosen three of the best qualified infantrymen purely for that purpose. It is... likely that we'll encounter high priority targets in the area. I need you all to be prepared." He turned to walk away from us, and Zack stepped forward.

"Has everyone got what they need?" he asked, arms crossed, and the three of us answered with a combined 'sir!'. Zack smiled and swung his arm for us to follow. "Then let's mosey!" he said, and walked off after Sephiroth. Me and the two other men followed eagerly down the halls. One of the guys was Dallert, probably chosen for his previous experience with reactors, and the other one had introduced himself to me as Reins, saying that he was picked for his investigative skills. I felt proud as I followed. Proud to be on a mission with Zack again, and with Sephiroth. I knew that Dallert was ecstatic. I did my best not to think about our destination, and instead just to focus on the mission. It was funny, but I thought about how if that mission had been lead solely by Sephiroth, and Zack didn't come along, I wouldn't be nearly as happy. I felt pretty comfortable around Zack at that point, despite the fact that he was a first class, and that helped when Sephiroth made me feel tense. I supposed that Zack really _was_ my new idol. Though I had to admit that working with Sephiroth for the first time was nothing short of invigorating.

When we arrived at the single armored truck that we were going to travel in, I almost tried to start a line for a head count. Everything had been so routine to me up until then. Sephiroth and Zack entered the back of the vehicle first, followed by Dallert and then myself. Reins had apparently been designated to drive us. Shortly after the doors were closed, the truck started up, leaving through the metal doors of the building. I gripped my supply-pack in my lap. Nothing in the pack was really any different from how it was during my last mission, as I'd only had time to unpack my journals. It looked like the others had packed lightly as well. Sephiroth didn't even seem to _have_ any luggage, but there were numerous boxes around the inside of the truck, and I assumed that he might have had some supplies in those. I let my bag down next to me by my feet, knowing that it was going to be a long ride. It didn't even seem like it would be a ride that we could make by car. Considering this, I looked up at Zack, who had just put down his luggage as well.

"How are we getting to... Nibelheim?" I asked him after a moment.

"A ferry will take us across the water," Sephiroth answered instead. "Then we'll simply drive."

"Gonna be a long drive..." Dallert said, removing his helmet and taking a seat on one of the boxes.

"We'll probably arrive tomorrow morning," Zack sighed, following Dallert's lead and taking a seat on a box as well. I grimaced to myself. The car ride to Nibelheim was going to take an entire day? I wasn't sure that my stomach would be able to handle it. I noticed Zack looking at me, but his eyes turned away as I looked back. I supposed he was probably worried for me. He knew about my motion-sickness after all. I started to think about how he told me to breathe, but figured that it might be best to save it until I needed it. It wasn't long until I _did _need it. Our truck docked on a ferry just outside the shoreline town of Junon, and Reins parked it to look back at us.

"Seaward bound," he said from the front, and Dallert laughed.

"I gotta check this out!" Dallert said, throwing open the doors to the back of the truck. The light from the outside was rather difficult to take in so suddenly. We had only one small window in the back, so my eyes had gotten used to a darker setting. By the time they adjusted, the ferry was just disembarking from the port. I heard Reins step out of the car from the front.

"Not bad," he said, joining Dallert in observing our surroundings. "The sea's nice this time o' year." He was probably right, but I didn't feel like stepping out to take a look. The only thing that I could focus on was the feeling of the boat sloshing along against the waves. I took in a deep breath with my chest, and then I felt Zack's hand on my shoulder.

"The fresh air would probably help," Zack said, looking past me and out the door. "The light would probably help too." I wasn't sure that either would help, but I appreciated his concern. I watched Sephiroth step out of the vehicle and into the sun, and then I turned my eyes to Zack, who was looking back at me now.

"I'm fine," I said after some thought. "I think I'll stay in here. Seeing the water will just make me feel sick." He paused and then sat down next to me.

"Okay," he said with a smile. "I'll join you then." I was still standing myself, but after staring down at him, I decided to sit. Zack just stayed silent, continuing to stare out into the water.

"So..." I said, turning my head to look at him as we sat. "You didn't know we were going to Nibelheim?" He looked back. "I mean... before you recommended me?"

"No," he said, sounding surprised. "No I didn't. Sorry about that."

"It's alright," I assured him. "I've been meaning to go back at some point, and I guess there's really no better way than to go with two first classes." Zack's smile faded a little bit. He wasn't frowning, but he looked a little preoccupied.

"I know we're not in Gold Saucer anymore," he started, looking back outside, "but you don't always have to think of me as a first class SOLDIER." I was startled by this statement. I didn't really know how to address him as anything but a SOLDIER, at least not when I was in uniform and Sephiroth was around. "We've both saved each other's hides, we've both made each other laugh..." Zack listed off. "We're partners now." He grinned, still not looking at me. _Partners_... I considered. I leaned back in thought, placing my hands down beside me. As I leaned, my finger touched against Zack's hand, which was also at his side. I didn't know why, but even though my arm twitched at the unexpected contact, I ignored the initial instinct to pull away. Zack didn't seem to react much to our hands touching, and just continued to look out. I guessed he really didn't have any reason to react. It was such a small thing after all, so I wondered why it felt so strange to me. I had already had that hand on my stomach once before. It shouldn't have felt so foreign, but it did. I swallowed and joined Zack in staring outside.

"On this route," I said, trying to make conversation, "we'll be passing by Gongaga, right?" That was the name of Zack's hometown, and it seemed to be a nicer topic for him than Nibelheim was for me.

"Yeah." He thought about it, and his finger moved against mine. "I'll have to visit there again sometime." He leaned his head back slowly. "Maybe I'll take you with me."

"Maybe," I thought aloud. I considered asking him about his parents, but I wasn't sure how he felt about the subject, and it only reminded me of what I had to deal with when we arrived. I could tell that Zack noticed my lament at the thought as he looked over at me.

"How are you feeling?" he said, moving his hand so that it was on top of mine. "About having to go back to your hometown?" I was too startled by the action to register the question. I couldn't help but glance down at the hands and then back up at him. He was smiling, as usual, but he had an unsureness about him, like he was waiting for me to move my hand. I didn't.

"Alright," I said, exhaling more than I meant to. I must have been shaken up. My pulse was beating fast, and I was thinking about his hand too much to realize that 'alright' was a rather unsatisfying answer. He didn't seem to care, though.

"Well that's good," he said. His fingers moved again against the back of my hand near my wrist. "I'll be there for you too, okay?" I looked at him as he said this. Zack was acting different. I understood now why the touch of his hand felt so foreign. There was something else behind it, something comforting, but nervous. Something affectionate. I swallowed again, not answering his question. How did I get this close to Zack? It was hard to remember where it had actually begun. No infantryman got this close to a SOLDIER, and Zack didn't even want me to think of him as a SOLDIER anymore. What did he _want _me to think of him as? I wished so badly that I had the courage to just ask him directly. Instead, I stayed silent as usual, and we just sat there, staring out the back of our dark truck and watching the land disappear into the distance. We sat there until the hand no longer felt out of place, and I shifted my fingers under his. Then Zack pulled his hand away, and I thought for a moment that I'd somehow done something wrong. It wasn't until a second later that Sephiroth came into my view and stepped back into the vehicle.

"We're docking shortly," he told us as Dallert stepped in. Dallert looked confused to see me and Zack sitting next to each other, but he broke from that confusion to shut the doors of the truck as Reins started up the engine. Only a moment later, we felt the bump of the ferry entering the dock, and after the shuffling off of a few passengers, and the clanking of the car ramp, we were once again on our way to Nibelheim. Zack stood up and started doing squats by the door. Apparently, his close proximity to me had taken my mind off the concept of being sick, so when I stopped to consider the amount of time we had left to the drive, my stomach started to churn. _Deep breaths_, I thought to myself, taking a large breath of air into my chest. Before I knew it, we'd be in Nibelheim, and I knew that I had to save my strength. It was about time to face the reality of my life.


	19. A SOLDIER's Touch Part 4

**Zack**

I would do squats for three different reasons, depending on the moment. Sometimes it was just the obvious: exercise. Sometimes it was simply to pass time. Other times, like right then in the back of that truck, I would do squats to think on something that I couldn't easily discuss with others. In the past, that had included things like people who were pronounced killed in action but were actually alive, and what sort of circumstances it would take for me to desert Shinra. Those topics were deep ones, and had probably crossed the minds of many of the more informed operatives, but what was on my mind then seemed to feel just as deep. When Cloud had touched his finger against mine, I was almost entirely convinced that it was an accident. Maybe it was, but when I put my hand over his, he didn't move it. I took a chance, and it seemed to pay off. I almost felt like laughing over how big an accomplishment that felt like. It would be a very small thing for most people, but I felt like I was crossing several boundaries attempting to get close to him. There had been no doubt at that point; I liked Cloud. I liked Cloud more than just an army buddy, more than just a friend. I liked Cloud more than I probably should have, but I'd had time to think about Cloud's behavior, and with that final test, I was convinced that he liked me as well. Of course, there was still that nagging in my head that made me feel like he just didn't want to upset me because I was a SOLDIER. Just with that, I knew I hadn't tested enough. It wouldn't _be _enough until I found out for sure how he felt about the two of us. I hadn't even ever heard him call me a friend, but that could have also been because of the gap in our ranks. I just didn't know what to do next. There was a very fine line, I figured, between learning how he felt and potentially destroying our friendship.

I grew frustrated and I needed to talk to _somebody_ about _something_, so I stopped doing squats, which I hadn't even been counting, and walked over to Sephiroth. I noticed one of the infantrymen that came along with us staring out the window near the front of the truck. It had already gotten dark at that point. The ferry ride had taken us into mid day itself, and we had been driving a while since. Also, judging from the sound of the windshield wipers and the pattering on the roof, we had driven into a storm. Sephiroth looked up at me from his seat on a crate by the wall. He was apparently expecting me to say something after my approach.

"I bet we're passing by the forest near Gongaga," I said, crossing my arms.

"Your hometown?" Sephiroth inquired.

"You knew?" I said, startled. Sephiroth laughed a little.

"Angeal spoke of it."

"Oh..." I frowned. Stepping away from Sephiroth, I approached the tall infantryman by the window. "How's it looking?" I asked him, and he looked back over his shoulder at me.

"Awfully dark out there, sir," he responded, gesturing out the window, "I wouldn't want to be the one driving right now."

"I can hear you." The driver said over the noise from the wipers. The other guy laughed. I took a look over at Cloud, noticing how quiet he had been. He was slouched against the wall, somewhat close to where he was sitting when we were on the boat. I walked over to him and placed my hand on his shoulder.

"What about you?" I asked as he looked up, "How are you doing?"

"Kind of sick, actually," he said, and it seemed like he was holding back a groan.

"Remember," I told him, "The key is to control your breathing."

"I know," he said after a breath, "but it's a very long ride. Normally I'd have thrown up by now." He held his stomach and leaned back against the wall, "Why couldn't my hometown have been next to Midgar?"

"You're from Nibelheim?" Sephiroth questioned, obviously overhearing. Cloud looked shocked to receive a question from Sephiroth, and he took a minute to reply.

"Yes, sir," he nodded, still clutching his stomach. Sephiroth didn't say anything else. I squeezed Cloud's shoulder just before letting go, and then moved back to the middle of the vehicle to do more squats.

"We're going to stop for the night soon," Sephiroth said, watching me exercise, "There are too many monsters out in the rain."

"Where are we stopping?" I asked between squats.

"There are no convenient towns," he shrugged, "So we'll have to stop the truck somewhere out here."

"But... what about the monsters?" I was confused by his logic, and I stopped exercising.

"I was told that somewhere around here, there is a monster that's extremely territorial. It should be the only one in the area," he explained, "So we just have to defeat that monster, and we'll have the area for ourselves."

"Oh, well if that's all..." I rolled my eyes and threw my arms up behind my head. I knew that any monster strong enough to scare all the other ones away was gonna be no piece of cake. I slowly returned my gaze to Sephiroth as he drew his signature sword, the Masamune, out from its spot next to the crates. The Masamune was over six feet long, and it was said to be too heavy for anyone else to wield. It was just an overall intimidating sword for an overall intimidating man, and it drew everyone's attention as he raised it, hopefully with the exception of our driver's. I wasn't sure _why_ he picked it up, but it seemed to come down to having something to do with his hands as he thought. I could only assume that he was thinking about the same thing I was, his words from earlier about possibly abandoning Shinra. "This is our first real mission together, huh?" I said, trying to change the mental subject, "I mean, where we've actually worked together anyway." Sephiroth didn't say anything, as though he was expecting what would happen next. Suddenly, the vehicle shook, knocking me and the standing infantryman off balance. I knew immediately that we didn't just hit a pothole.

"S-sir!" Our driver yelled from the front. I looked over, but I figured that he was probably addressing Sephiroth. "Something strange just crashed into our truck!" Sephiroth stood from his seat and my attention was drawn back to him.

"_That_," he said, looking at me and readying his blade, "would be our monster..." I took that as my cue, and I drew the Buster Sword. The infantryman standing in the back with us readied his gun as well, but Sephiroth sent him a sharp stare. "Stay inside," he told the man, and the gun was lowered. I pushed open the doors of the vehicle, and was rudely reminded that it was raining. Shielding myself as though it would actually help, I watched Sephiroth step past me and drop out of the truck. I followed, and shut the doors behind me.

There was the monster. I hadn't seen anything quite like it before. It was a large, dark green dragon, and despite the fact that it was down on all four of its legs, it stood about twice Sephiroth's height, and he was taller than me. With muscular arms, it pressed its claws into the ground and spread its wings wide open as we looked on, challenging us to a fight. Slowly, Sephiroth raised the Masamune up next to his head, pointing the tip at the beast, and it roared in response. It was sort of like a typical battle of the beasts over territory. The two of them were staring each other down, trying to frighten the other one off. Normally, I'd say that anything in a stare-down with Sephiroth should run as fast as it can out of there, but that beast looked stronger than anything I'd faced so far, at least when it came to monsters. However, I was ready for the experience, so I raised my sword as well and charged straight at the thing, as was my usual battle plan.

Almost as if in annoyance, the monster batted me away with the back of its hand, not even using its claws. The attack wasn't strong, but I stumbled around trying to keep my footing. The _real_ retaliation came when it followed the batting with a flamethrower breath from its mouth. The flames came quick, and it was all I could do to block them with my sword. Strangely, blocking the flames was successful. At least it was successful until my sword began turning red and heating up like a stove. Luckily, the breath stopped just as I had to toss the Buster away, flailing my hands in pain. I looked back at the monster, defenseless, just in time to see Sephiroth come into the picture. His speed was unheard of. I had only a second to see him swing that massive blade, cutting through the dragon's skin and grazing a nearby rock so fast that the gash lit up. The dragon reared back and roared, preparing another flamethrower, but rearing back was a bad idea. Sephiroth had a clear shot of the stomach, and he plunged his blade straight throw it and out the monster's back. Lightning struck in such time with the attack that I was almost convinced that he'd caused it. He held not only the wait of his sword, but the dragon's as well in only one hand, and waited until it stopped moving and he knew it was dead.

"Geez..." I said, wiping some of the rain off my face, "Show off." I reached down to touch my sword and yanked my hand back, burning my fingers.

"Hmph..." Sephiroth watched me swing my hand again in the rain, "This area should be safe now."

"Yeah, well," I said, not attempting to move it again, "If we're gonna set up camp, we should drive a little further to put some space between us and _that_." I gestured to the dead dragon.

"Then lets go," he said, walking over and grabbing my sword by the handle. I crossed my arms as I watched him bring it back to the truck. That guy was inhuman.

Shortly after the truck took off again, and we found a new spot to make camp, Sephiroth informed me that we had no camping supplies and that we'd be sleeping in the vehicle. That only furthered the need I felt to get out and get some fresh air. Some fresh air that _wasn't_ being filled with dragon breath. I thought that Cloud probably felt the same way. He was irked that we even had to drive any further, but at least it was a short drive, and soon we were all sitting around inside, waiting for the rain to stop. Eventually it did, and my squats stopped with it. Taking note of the lack of noise on the roof, I threw open the doors and breathed in the night air. When I stepped out, I startled our driver, who had already stepped out to light a cigarette. A cigarette that was promptly hidden from my view.

"Sir!" He sputtered, and smoke puffed from his mouth

"Go ahead," I said, swinging my hand dismissively, "You're pretty much off duty for now." Reluctantly, he returned the smoke to his mouth and nodded.

"Thanks, sir," he puffed, and then lifted the pack in the air, "Want one?" I shook my head and he went back to his business. I saw Cloud, still slumped against the crate, when I looked back inside the truck.

"I'm going for a little walk," I said to him and he looked up, "You should come along."

"I don't know..." Cloud said, holding his stomach, "I'm a little... under the weather." The infantryman behind him looked shocked, questioning Cloud questioning _me_.

"Well, the weather's feeling a little better," I responded humorously, throwing open my arms and glancing at the sky, then back at him, "Come on! It'll be good for you." He hesitated at the hand I offered to help him up, but then he smiled and took it. I pulled him to his feet, and he let himself out of the vehicle, the gravel crunching under his boots. I started walking, and I noticed that as Cloud followed, we caught the driver's attention. I guessed it was strange to see an infantryman going for a walk with a SOLDIER for no particular reason. We walked for a short distance until we came upon a small drop down like a cliff that offered us a view. I walked to the edge and stared off into the distance, taking in the sight of a cluster of large mountains a ways off. "Is that Mt. Nibel?" I turned to Cloud and he looked up.

"Looks like it," he said with a hint of reluctance, "I guess we'll be there soon."

"Sephiroth says we'll arrive pretty quickly in the morning," I agreed, sitting down at the edge of the drop. The rocks on the ground shuffled as Cloud sat down beside me. We just sat there for a moment, and I took the time to remove my uniform gloves, feeling the night air cool against my hands. I sat the gloves down beside me and looked over the small burns on my fingertips. They weren't bad at all, and at that point I barely felt them. Relieved, I leaned back and rested my hands down next to me. Cloud watched my hands, and then looked at my face.

"Thanks for taking me out here." He put his hands down as well, "I _do_ feel a little better." I rolled a couple rocks between my fingers and looked back at him.

"No problem." I said. He wasn't looking at me anymore. I watched him stare off into the night, towards his hometown, and I felt like touching his hand again. It was kind of an odd desire. I supposed I felt like that was the closest I'd gotten to him. SOLDIERs and infantrymen don't hold hands, so when we _did_, we no longer felt like a SOLDIER and an infantryman. It was sort of the same thing I'd been going for ever since we arrived at Gold Saucer, only... different. I didn't have an excuse this time. I wasn't going to be able to cover anything up by saying that I was worried or consoling. Despite this, I touched the tip of my finger against the side of his hand and waited for a reaction. I didn't really know what sort of reaction I expected from just a touch. What I definitely _didn't_ expect was for Cloud to place his hand on top of mine. His body tensed as he did it, and I could feel the soft fabric of his glove rest on my skin. I'm sure it didn't help when all I could do was to stare at him in return.

"I think I've gotten used to the idea," Cloud said quietly after swallowing, "of going back to my hometown." He relaxed a bit, softening his shoulders, still gazing far into the distance, "It's not so... frightening anymore." I looked from our hands to his face and he looked back, still somewhat nervous.

"Frightening?" I questioned, blinking out of my silence. He nodded.

"Yeah. Sometimes," He said, "You build these expectations for people, but sometimes you can't live up to them." He sighed and leaned back a little, looking up into the sky, "Everyone expects me to return as a SOLDIER."

"You know..." I said, taking him in, "You may be an infantryman, but you've been through a lot more than many of the SOLDIERs I know." I shifted a little so that my body faced more towards his, but I kept my hand in place, "Title isn't everything."

"I said I'd be a hero." He looked back at me, and I smiled.

"Well, _I'm _still working on that one," I laughed softly, and Cloud smiled a bit too, if still somewhat preoccupied, "You've gotta have dreams. Always." I moved my hand out, and gripped his. He looked tense again. "You can't go back to your hometown perfect." I shrugged, "'cause then you'd have nothing to dream for." He softened and his smile looked more content.

"Yeah, I guess your right," he agreed, moving his fingers against my hand, "Someday I want to be like you. I want to be able to make people dream." He paused and seemed to be considering something, "To make people able to believe in heroes." I opened my mouth ever so slightly to say something, but I wasn't quite sure what to say after that. I felt awestruck at him. At the infantryman who was so much more than he thought he was. I realized how big it was now. How big it was to hold his hand like that. How much of a difference there was between the ferry ride and now, under the stars. I could only stare at him. I stared until he swallowed again, and his eyes shifted around before returning to mine.

I went to say something again, but I didn't. That was when I knew the time was right. I was going to press those boundaries between feelings and friendships. Because he held my hand tight now, and I knew there was more there than before. Because his eyes tried to shake, but they were stuck on mine. Whether we'd meant to or not, we had gotten closer. We were _getting_ closer, and I watched my reflection in Cloud's nervous eyes. Our hands were on the ground, and I felt myself pressing into his as I leaned towards him. I slowed, inches from his face. His eyes were mostly closed, but were still watching me in anticipation. I hesitated there before his mouth. I hesitated too long. Long enough to feel his breath mingle with mine. To let a chill from the night air run down my back. I found _myself_ swallowing, and the two of us pulled apart before anything else. We didn't pull away as far as we were before, but just far enough to stare at each other again. Then I leaned away, and I felt like an idiot because Cloud looked disappointed, and _I_ was disappointed, but I thought I let the moment pass.

I grabbed a handful of gravel and watched it as it rolled in my hand. I heard Cloud's hand shift on the ground, alone.

"You'll be... everything you want to be," I said after a moment, looking back up at him, "Just never stop dreaming." He stared at me. At the gravel in my hands, and at the gleam I felt in my eyes. He turned to look off the cliff again, and for a minute, he was silent.

"I won't." He dropped a single rock off the side and watched it fall, and his smile slowly returned, "You don't stop either, okay?" he said, looking at me and shifting to stand up. Then, before he stood, Cloud put his hand on my arm, leaned in, and kissed me on the mouth. It was unexpected, and shorter than I thought it would be. I was still startled when Cloud pulled away, looking at me for only a second before standing and walking back in the direction of the truck. I felt my face warm up, and I watched him as he walked. For a second, he stopped, and I thought that he'd turn around, but then he started walking again.

It wasn't until a short while later that I returned to the vehicle myself. Sephiroth was standing just outside and acknowledged me with a look. Cloud was inside. I wasn't sure whether he was asleep or not, but he'd gotten into one of the sleeping bags from the crates. The other infantryman had done the same thing. I guessed that our driver was sleeping in front.

"You should sleep," Sephiroth said in a somewhat hushed tone, "We'll be leaving early tomorrow morning." I nodded at him and climbed into the truck. Taking a final look at Cloud, I removed a sleeping bag for myself and placed it down in the center of the truck. I wasn't sure how well I'd be able to sleep, but I had no idea what I'd run into in Nibelheim, so I supposed I'd try my best. I eased closed the doors of the truck and slipped off my boots. The sleeping bag was soft and it didn't actually take me long to drift to sleep.

Next stop: Nibelheim.


	20. A SOLDIER's Home Part 1

**Cloud**

It took me forever to fall asleep that last night. I kept realizing exactly what it was that I did, only to have it hit me again minutes later. I kissed a SOLDIER first class. No, I kissed Zack Fair. He had almost kissed me moments earlier, though. _Almost_. That had to count for something, but then he pulled back. He decided not to. I couldn't help but feel that I'd gone too far by kissing him and walking away that night. It wasn't my first kiss, but the only other one I'd ever had dated back to my childhood days when me and Tifa wondered what it would be like. I didn't think this kiss was any longer than that childhood one. I couldn't make it any longer. I was already too far in shock at my own actions to really focus. I went straight to pretending to sleep as soon as I got back to the truck, and I never really got to gauge Zack's reaction. Naturally, I felt like a pile of nerves for hours. As if it wasn't enough on my mind that I would be arriving at my hometown in the morning for the first time since I'd left. Somehow, despite all this, I didn't have a shred of regret towards doing it. I guessed that, even though my mind wasn't exactly at rest, that kiss brought some things into the light for me. Things like the strange sensation I felt after the gondola ride at Gold Saucer, and the emptiness that came with resigning myself away from Zack and back to the normal infantry missions. I didn't know if I'd _clearly_ thought of Zack that way until that night, but it all made sense. There were plenty of new thoughts, but they were all a little bit... easier now.

The thought of returning back to Nibelheim, however, was just as encumbering as it was before. The ride there wasn't too long once we set out in the morning, and at least my stomach still felt fine as we approached the town's gates. Reins stopped the truck just before driving into town, and turned around to peek back at us through a small window.

"I'm gonna let you guys out here," he said, gesturing out the windshield. "Gonna find a less conspicuous parking spot and start the investigation around the outskirts."

"Then we'll meet up later!" Dallert responded, hitting his hand against the wall between himself and the driver's seat. Zack looked at me and then threw open the doors of the truck, hopping out. Sephiroth followed, and so did Dallert, looking back at me just before leaving. "Home sweet home, right?" he said and dropped out. Taking a deep breath, I got out as well.

There it was: Nibelheim. It hadn't changed at all since I'd left it years ago. As we approached the entrance, I heard the truck start up and drive off behind us, leaving me and Dallert as the only two infantrymen. Sephiroth took the lead, and the two of us followed closely behind. Zack seemed preoccupied and let himself fall back a bit. I couldn't blame him. I was a little distracted too, and I think I was the _cause_ of his distraction. My attention was drawn back to Sephiroth as he slowed down to a stop in the entrance.

"So, how does it feel?" he said, staring into the town. No one responded, and he turned his head and held a hand out in my direction. "To be home after all this time?" I was startled. Startled that he was talking to me like that, and startled that he'd even known it had been a while since my last visit. I couldn't think of the words to respond. "I have no hometown," he continued, explaining his interest. "I wouldn't know." Zack caught up, and the two of us met glances out of the corner of each other's eyes.

"Uh... what about family?" Zack asked, trying to make up for my silence. Sephiroth turned around, most likely because he didn't expect to hear Zack respond.

"My mother's name is Jenova," he said after a moment. All three of us seemed to be startled that he'd actually answered that. "She died shortly after I was born. My father..." He paused for an uncomfortably long moment, then shrugged as a smile formed across his face. Then he laughed. It wasn't a long laugh, but it wasn't short either. It was just long enough to make my body tense all over. He placed a hand against his forehead, still smiling. "Why am I talking about this?" He shrugged again, shaking his head, and turned back around to face the town. "Come on, let's go." And with that, he walked onward. It was time to take my first steps back into my hometown. Dallert started to move, and I joined him, but Zack stayed behind for a moment. I almost worried that he was purposely keeping his distance from me.

Nibelheim hadn't really changed, but even though it'd only been a few years since I'd seen it, it still felt smaller. That probably came from living in Midgar. The first thing I noticed was the well I had sat on years ago and made a promise, the second thing I noticed was the girl that I'd made that promise to. I froze. Tifa stood in the center of town, watching us come in. She was wearing a brown cowgirl hat and a short skirt and boots to match. She didn't look at me, but I didn't blame her. I'd put my helmet back on that morning. She didn't even look at Sephiroth as he passed her by. She was waiting for someone else. She was waiting for me to arrive as a first class, like I'd told her I would. I couldn't muster the courage to walk up and tell her that I still hadn't made it. So I just stood there, and Zack finally walked up. She turned her attention to him.

"Are you one of the SOLDIER people who've come to investigate?" she said, stepping over to him. Zack looked at her, and Sephiroth looked back as he was about to enter the town's inn.

"Yeah." Zack nodded after a minute. It was clear he was wondering how she knew we were there to investigate, as I'd been wondering the same thing. "My name is Zack, and I'm with SOLDIER." He straightened himself out. "First class, mind you, first class!" Obviously he was trying to impress her, but as she stared at him, all she did was raise her hand to her chin and let out one little:

"Huh." Zack looked taken aback by this response.

"What do you mean, _huh_?" He frowned, looking cross. Tifa lowered her hands again to her sides.

"Are there a lot of SOLDIER first classes?" she asked, and Zack looked refreshed at her lack of knowledge about the subject.

"Nope," He grinned, closing his fist over his chest. "we're a small, elite group." She still didn't seem impressed, and it was starting to bother me that Zack was trying so hard.

"They sent only two?" She sighed, and my heart felt like it dropped in my chest. I knew she was wondering about me, but I still couldn't get myself to come forward.

"Yeah," Zack looked back over his shoulder to the door of the inn. "me and Sephiroth."

"Uh-huh..." she said, disheartened as she turned away. Zack looked back at her with a confused expression and shrugged as she walked away. Then she stopped and turned back to face him. At first, he was startled, and looked as though he thought she'd read his mind or something. With one hand raised, she opened her mouth to talk, but thought better of it and ran off further into town. Both he and I watched her go, then I moved to join him and Sephiroth by the inn.

"Weird girl..." Zack said, crossing his arms and turning to Sephiroth. "So what's on the agenda, boss?"

"We'll keep the investigation to the town and the outskirts today," Sephiroth said, looking us over. "We depart for the reactor at dawn. Make sure to get plenty of sleep." Sephiroth then turned his focus on Zack, staring him in the eyes to make sure he was paying attention. "Only one of you needs to keep watch. Make sure you get some rest as well." They just stared at each other for a moment, and it felt like they shared some kind of hidden meaning beneath the words.

"Gotcha," Zack said, less than enthusiastically. I walked up closer beside him, wondering what was on his mind.

"Ah, that's right..." Sephiroth gestured at me before opening the door. "You have permission to go visit family and friends, if you so wish." He opened the door and walked into the inn.

"I'll be out in a few," Zack said to me and followed Sephiroth inside. By his wording, I assumed it'd be best if I stayed outside and kept a look out. Dallert walked up to me after a moment.

"How's it feel to be back?" he asked, throwing his arm over my shoulder. "I gotta know." I sighed and walked a few steps away from him, taking a seat on a convenient crate by the inn.

"I don't know yet." I shrugged. "I haven't been here long enough to decide."

"Least you're here with good company." He laughed, taking a seat next to me. As we sat, Dallert looked like he had something on his mind. Finally, he turned his head to me and asked, "So what's up?"

"Huh?" I looked questioningly at him. He'd been with me for a little while now, and I just told him I didn't know how to feel about being home.

"You know... with you and Zack?" He gestured to the door that Zack had disappeared into moments earlier. I crossed my arms defensively.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, first off, this is the second mission he's taken you on in a week..." He shrugged, and scooted himself back on the crate, "And you guys were sitting together on the boat, and he took you on a walk with him yesterday..." I looked away from him, still crossing my arms. "I mean, don't get me wrong. I had a _great_ chat with Sephiroth when you left me alone on the truck with 'im."

"Tch." I laughed a little. "I'm sorry about that." I looked back at him and shrugged myself. "I guess we're just getting close after the missions."

"Like war buddies, huh?" he laughed again and I nodded. "Well good for you, I guess." He turned his attention forward as a man with a camera around his neck ran up to us.

"Am I late?" The guy panted, hands on his legs. "I heard Sephiroth was coming and got my camera ready." He stood up straight and gripped the camera with a grin. "I want a shot of Sephiroth and a monster." Dallert laughed in response.

"Sephiroth's busy," Dallert said, standing from his seat. "But you could take a shot of us if you'd like?" I didn't appreciate being volunteered for a picture, but the man didn't look too interested anyway.

"I don't take pictures with nobodies." He stuck up his nose and walked away. Dallert made some noise and waved his hand dismissively.

"So I guess that's what we are here, huh?" he said, turning to me. "Nobodies?"

"Don't let it get to you." I stood from my seat as well. "They're just not used to seeing the army here."

"Let it get to me? I probably make four times what that guy does." He laughed and patted me again on the arm before starting to walk away. "I'm gonna go start my investigation in town. Meet up with you later!" I silently agreed as he left, then I turned to look at the inn. At least it wasn't _too_ likely that I'd run into someone I knew in there. Still, I had an urge to see more of the places that I frequented as a child. Sephiroth _did_ say we were allowed to visit family and friends. Maybe I could actually build up the courage to do just that. Until then, I'd continued to wait for Zack. I still felt like I needed to talk to him again. I needed to know how he was taking everything, and I could only wonder about what we had to come.


	21. A SOLDIER's Home Part 2

**Zack**

Nibelheim. Long ago, I laughed when Cloud told me he lived there. I actually found out where he lived before even knowing his name. The place wasn't so bad, however, and may have actually been a bit _less_ backwater than my hometown, Gongaga. Cloud seemed ruffled to be back though. He stayed silent pretty much the entire time when we'd gotten there, even when Sephiroth tried to ask him a question. I _had_ tried to make him comfortable with the whole SOLDIER first class thing, but it still wasn't a good idea to take Sephiroth lightly. I bet he was still thinking about the previous night. I know _I_ was. I'd have to find a good time to talk to him later, but I figured that I'd drop my stuff off at the room first. I took a look around the inn when I came inside. It was a nice little place, but it definitely _was_ little. The first floor had a small breakfast table set up near the wall. Behind the desk, I saw the two smiling faces of the people who ran the place.

"Welcome!" the clerk girl said, waving her hand. "Make yourself at home." She gestured at the stairs, and I smiled back as I climbed them. I saw Sephiroth standing up there on the second floor, staring out a window. This floor was small too. It was mostly made up of a single single room with three beds. I walked up to Sephiroth and looked out the window with him.

"What are you looking at?" I asked him. He blinked, but didn't make any effort to look back at me.

"This landscape..." He frowned, pausing before he continued. "I could swear I've seen it before." I looked to him, and then back outside. The mountains around Nibelheim were very jagged, and they were colored a sort of blue-gray. It wasn't exactly the sort of thing you could mistake for something else.

"But... you've never been here before, right?" I said after a moment. Sephiroth stayed quiet and just continued to stare outside. "Creepy." Then I heard a beep come from my pocket. I pulled out my phone and took a look. It was alerting me that I'd gotten an email from... Cloud?

_Subject: I wanted to tell you – From: Cloud_

_ We've been on a few missions together, and there's something I've been meaning to tell you. I _

_ was thinking about telling you once we were in my hometown, but it's a little embarrassing, so _

_ I'm going to write it out and send it to you. The day you changed your hair, when you wished us _

_ rookies good luck before our sortie-I'll never forget your words. Remembering what you said _

_ that day gives me the courage to stay strong._

_ So...thanks, Zack._

I smiled to myself, trying not to catch Sephiroth's attention. The _day I changed my hair_ was a funny way of saying it, but I knew he meant that speech I gave when I first became a SOLDIER first class. That was nice to hear. I didn't really get too much feedback on that, and coming from Cloud, I knew he meant it.

"I'm gonna go out for a bit," I said to Sephiroth, still not getting a reaction, and then I went back down the stairs. When I left the inn, Cloud was still standing pretty close by. There was a man with a camera off to the side, but despite getting excited and pointing it at me, he didn't snap a shot. He was probably expecting good ol' Sephiroth to pose for him. That's probably _why_ Sephiroth went straight indoors. Cloud looked a tad fidgety as I walked up to him with a smile, so I placed a hand on his shoulder for reassurance. "Why are you wearing the mask?" I asked, bending down to try and see his eyes under the helmet.

"It's... personal," he said after a pause, and I cocked my head at him.

"Weirdo." I pushed him a little with the hand on his shoulder, and took it back. "What are you, camera shy?" I grinned and waved back to the man with the camera. He seemed highly uninterested.

"That's... not it." Cloud shook his head, looking back at the guy, and then back at me.

"You feeling sick from the ride?" I pressed, starting to worry about him. He shook his head again, this time more vigorously.

"No, I'm fine." He waved his hand in front of his face, and then turned around, looking at me over his shoulder. "I'm gonna look around town a bit with Dallert, okay?"

"Uh... sure." I scratched the back of my neck. Cloud hesitated, but then he ran off into town. I knew that Cloud had some issues with being back at his hometown, but it felt like something else was bothering him too. I started to think about the night before, and the kiss. I still couldn't believe he'd actually _kissed_ me. I couldn't believe that I hadn't kissed _him_. It was all so brief and... unfinished. But it was clear that he didn't want to talk about it that second. Thinking so much about Cloud brought my thoughts back to when I really figured out that I liked him. Back to when I said goodbye to... Aerith! I'd almost forgotten to call her again. It'd been an entire day since I'd seen her, and I told her I'd keep in touch. I flipped open my cell phone and dialed.

"Hello." I heard the soft voice on the other end of the line.

"Hey, Aerith." I grinned even though she couldn't see me. "I just arrived at Nibelheim."

"Oh, that's good," she said, sounding like she was smiling too. "Is it nice?"

"There's a lot of mountain..." I observed, glancing at Mt. Nibel looming above me. "But yeah, it's nice and... quaint."

"Quaint?" She laughed. "I guess the mountain's are why your phone's kind of fuzzy."

"I don't know _how_ you keep up your good reception in the slums." I shook my head. "You plant a little radio tower in your garden or something?"

"Hmm," she hummed and paused for a minute. "One of the wheels came off the wagon."

"Aw, man... That's too bad," I said, starting to pace while I talked.

"You'll just have to come back quick and fix it." She giggled.

"You could have Tseng take a whack at it." I laughed, and she hummed again.

"Actually, one of the other SOLDIER guys offered to do it, buuuut..." There was another long pause on the other end of the phone. "I'd really like _you_ to do it."

"Yeah, alright," I agreed. "I shouldn't be here _too_ long. Maybe I can bring Cloud to meet you?" I felt guilty just mentioning that again.

"Hmm. Is he there with you?"

"Yeah, it's his hometown," I said, slowing my pace into a stop. "Me and him are... pretty good friends now. I think you'd like him."

"He's nice, right?" Aerith's tone made the question feel strange. "I mean, you really like him, don't you?"

"Well... yeah," I answered, still more confused than I should have been. "Yeah, I do. I mean... he's nice."

"Then I approve," she said plainly, and I waited a long moment to speak.

"Approve?" I stretched the word in my pronunciation. I heard her hum a little tune before continuing.

"You know I can feel these things," she said, as though what she was talking about was obvious. "Just remember... You still owe me _one_ date."

"W-wait!" I pulled the phone away and stared at it in shock, still holding it close enough to speak into it. "What do you mean, approve? Aerith?" I heard her laugh.

"Talk to you later, Zack," she continued to laugh through her words. "Come home soon." Then, before I could do anything about it, the phone clicked and I was disconnected. I sighed and let my eyes wander, jumping when they came in contact with the girl in the hat from earlier.

"That's your phone?" she asked, hands on her hips. "Mind if I take a look?"

"I guess not," I said, handing it over. She pressed a few buttons on it, and then started scribbling something on her arm with a pen. "Hey, what are you doing?"

"Grabbing your number." She smirked, handing back the phone. "I'm Tifa, by the way."

"Zack," I said, looking my phone over before putting it away. I remembered seeing Tifa mentioned a few times in Cloud's journals, but he never said anything to her when we came in. I wondered how the two of them really knew each other, but it would've probably been out of line to ask her before Cloud.

"You told me." She nodded, turning away. "I'll catch you later, Zack!" And again she ran off. Such a weird girl. I didn't see her again while I was out that day, nor did I see Cloud. Most of the people I talked to around town had very little to say about the reactor, or they'd already talked to one of the other guys. The only helpful piece of information I got that entire time was from a small child, which led me to finding a materia in the well. All in all, that wasn't the most productive day for me. I guessed I'd have to wait for my chance to shine when we climbed the mountain the next day.

Later that night, I sat in bed thinking about what was to come the next day. It was dark, so it didn't hit me at first, but I realized that one of the beds was empty. That caught my attention especially, since earlier that night one of the infantrymen pointed out that we were short one bed. The man who drove the truck was the one who opted to be the night patrol, so he was out. I took up one of the three beds, and the man who took up the other was the taller of the infantrymen we had with us. I could tell it wasn't Cloud, because his hair was a darker color. The last bed, the empty one, should have been filled by Sephiroth or Cloud. Sephiroth had been sitting in one of the chairs by a table in that room, and still was. I swore I hadn't ever seen that guy sleep. As for Cloud, I didn't know. So I decided to get up and sneak out to take a look around. The clerk and the owner were absent downstairs, so I sneaked through the room and pushed open the door outside. Same as the previous night, the air outside was cool, and I was met with a breeze when I stepped out. Noticing Cloud standing by the well, I paused and decided to walk over and talk.

"Can't sleep?" I asked quietly, and he turned around, only somewhat startled.

"Yeah." He nodded, looking me over. "I was just thinking about the past."

"The past..." I considered, crossing my arms. I wondered exactly how far back he was thinking. I couldn't help but get stuck on the other night, but I figured it probably had something to do with the last time he'd been home. There wasn't too many significant things for me to think about from my past. At least not before I was in SOLDIER. I brought my wandering eyes back to Cloud. "You wanna talk about it?"

"Thanks, Zack, but we've got an early day tomorrow." He shrugged, and started to walk toward the inn. "I should try to get some sleep." As he came near me, I gave him a look.

"Come on, man," I said, turning to watch him, and he stopped. "What's with all these secrets and personals all of a sudden?" I walked up to him and put a hand on his shoulder as I liked to do. "It's not like we're not... close at this point, right?" He flinched a bit at my wording, and for a second, I felt a little too intrusive, so I took back my hand as he faced me.

"Zack..." He frowned, and I took this moment to realize that he'd not been wearing his helmet. "I won't mention this again if you don't want me to, but..." He paused and looked down at the ground. "The other night..."

"The other night was good," I said before he could continue, interlocking my fingers behind my head. "Thanks." He just stood there in silence, still looking at the ground. Then, a small smile came over his face and he looked back up at me.

"I was just thinking about this well," he said, turning to touch the wooden structure. "I used to sit on it. It felt bigger back then." I looked up at the top of the well. It was pretty big for a well, in my opinion anyway.

"I was up there earlier today." I pointed and walked over to climb up the ladder. "Want to sit?" I was halfway up the ladder when he shook his head.

"I'd rather not..." He frowned up at me and I hopped down. "Not tonight."

"Alright, well... we should get to bed anyway." I said, walking over to him.

"Uh-huh." Cloud nodded. I touched his shoulder again, and leaned my face close to his, smirking at him.

"Cloud," I said, watching him look nervous. "I like you." I pulled him close to me and kissed him. Just a little longer than he kissed me. Then I pulled back and smirked again. "Now _I'm_ gonna walk away." I moved passed him, back towards the door of the inn. "Don't stay up too long, alright?" He said nothing back. I continued to smile on my way back up to the room. Cloud's face looked so wonderful after I'd kissed him. He looked scatterbrained. Like he was thinking about too much and too little at the same time. But he looked happy enough. There was something fulfilling about having both started a kiss. Now it was no longer in the shadows. No longer in doubt. I sort of wished I had stayed to talk with him longer, but shortly after I got in bed, he came in and got in the other one. I figured that was probably healthier than staying up and talking all night. Though it was dark, I looked in the direction of his bed until my eyelids fell heavy and I felt myself drifting off. My final thoughts were of the mountain we were going to climb, and the reactor we were going to investigate. Most of all, I thought about who we might encounter. I thought about Angeal, and what I might actually say if I had the chance. But I could only keep my thoughts going for so long, and before I knew it, I was out like a light...


	22. A SOLDIER's Home Part 3

**Cloud**

The previous day had been tough on my brain. I had come home to Nibelheim for the first time in years, seen my childhood friend and restricted myself from talking to her, and I had to juggle thoughts of reminiscence and my new situation with Zack. I knew that Zack meant well, but when he'd come to talk to me that last night, he couldn't have chosen a worse moment. I had been remembering more than I told him, remembering more than the well. I remembered the promise I made to Tifa that night, to come and be her knight in shining armor. To become a hero, a SOLDIER first class. To become respected by the people of my town, by Tifa, and most of all by her father. Tifa had been my best friend. She was pretty much my _only_ friend, and a misunderstanding caused her father to forbid me from seeing her. Nowadays, I probably would've spoken up. I would've told him that I was the one that _saved_ Tifa, not the one that hurt her, but I was only a child then. I was thinking about all the things I could have done differently, and all the things I could have _said_ differently, and then Zack came by. Zack came by and talked to me about sitting on that well where I had once sat with Tifa the day before I left. He came by and kissed me, and reminded me that this was no longer childhood curiosity, no longer knights in shining armor, and that the world was far more complicated than I'd ever known when I packed up my bags and just walked out. With all this in my head, I felt I would be lucky to come out of this mission with my mind still intact.

Still, I thought that despite all the internal confusion, a simple hiking trip up Mt. Nibel couldn't be too hard on me. Sure there would be monsters, but Sephiroth and Zack were both coming along. I'd probably scarcely have the chance to fire my rifle. I hadn't considered, however, that for our trip we would have enlisted the help of a local guide, and that guide would turn out to be the cause of half the chaos in my brain. As we approached the gates of the old Nibelheim mansion on the outskirts of town, I felt myself turn pale when I saw Tifa there, waiting for us. Zack, the other half of the chaos, looked surprised as well, and he walked up right next to her.

"Tifa!" he exclaimed, and I was startled to hear that he knew her name. "You're our guide?"

"At your service!" She grinned and smirked at him. I felt my stomach drop. Mt. Nibel was the place where she got injured years ago, and where I had to pull her back to town from. I couldn't help but feel it was too dangerous for her, but I couldn't just speak out when Sephiroth was standing right there with us. The camera man from the previous day had obviously taken note of Sephiroth's presence as well, and he bore a serious expression as he drew the camera to his eye.

"Okay..." he said, getting everyone's attention as he focused the lens. "Say cheese!" Zack looked preoccupied for a moment, but when he noticed Tifa readying a pose next to Sephiroth, he straightened himself and crossed his arms for the picture. Sephiroth simply stood there as the camera flash went off.

"Let's go," Sephiroth said, turning in the direction of the mountain. "The trip will take a while, so let's not waste any time." He started to walk, and was followed by Tifa and Zack. I gave a final look back to Dallert, who was told to stay in the town and continue the investigation, and he nodded at me in acknowledgment. As I moved to join up with the others, I saw Zack approach Tifa again.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked her as they walked. "We can probably find the reactor ourselves."

"Nibel's pretty complicated," she said, not even looking at him. "Nobody is a better guide than me in this town." Part of me wished the two of them weren't talking. I wasn't sure why. It may have been because _I_ wanted to talk to both of them. I still wasn't ready to face Tifa though, so I'd donned my helmet earlier that morning, and if I talked to Zack, I'd risk being overheard by her. I supposed that I didn't mind him talking to her all that much, since he was trying to convince her not to go, and that was something I wanted done.

"But it's too dangerous!" Zack frowned, trying to look her in the eye. "We don't know what we'll encounter on the way up."

"That's half the reason you need a good guide." She shrugged, turning her face to his. "I've got all the monsters' locations and behavioral patterns memorized."

"It's not just the monsters..." Zack frowned, still looking impressed at her words. "There's a lot of secret Shinra stuff going on right now and..."

"I think I'm up for it," she interrupted, and Zack looked about as disappointed as I was at hearing her say that. I grew a little nostalgic as we began to walk up the twisted path at the base of the mountain.

"We can't get you involved in something like this!" he complained, also taking in the sight. I began to wonder why he was persisting so much.

"She'll be fine, if you protect her," Sephiroth said as he looked back at the two. Evidently, he was wondering the same thing. That shut Zack up, and I supposed that there was no arguing Tifa's part in this. After a few minutes of walking, we'd gotten high enough on the mountain to see a bridge before us with a significant drop underneath. Just in front of the bridge was our first monster. It was a floating, fiery creature, who's attention was drawn to us very quickly.

"Stand back!" Zack said, throwing his arm out and halting our advance. He seemed to be acting a lot more protective now that he was on a mission with a girl. I felt the same way though, because of this particular girl, and I got my gun ready just in case. Zack ran forward, chopping and slicing at the monster. There was no blood, but flame trails followed his attacks, and the monster bobbed in the air. It held its small hands against itself, squinting its eyes, but instead of passing out, it grew to twice its size. "W-what?" Zack said in surprise, stumbling back.

"Look out!" Sephiroth ran forward, drawing and swinging his massive blade faster than I could see. The creature was thrown to the side, still enlarging itself. Sephiroth's attack sent it just far enough away to keep us safe when the monster's entire body blew up into flames, leaving nothing behind.

"That," Tifa pointed as the flames dispersed, "was a bomb."

"Could have told me ahead of time..." Zack frowned, lowering his sword. We proceeded to travel along the Nibel bridge. It was just about as rickety as it looked. I figured that the bomb monsters probably kept people from coming to fix it up too often. No sooner did we step off the other side of the bridge than another monster came at us. This monster was a lot more normal looking. It was a rather large bird with particularly sharp looking talons. Once again, Zack stepped forward. "I've got this one." His words were obviously directed at Sephiroth, who said nothing. This time, Zack was right. It was just after a short flurry of attacks from the Buster Sword that the monster dropped to the ground.

"Good job," Tifa said, patting Zack on the back and interrupting his moment of pride. "We'll have a lot more of those on the trip up." She started walking ahead, and I stepped up to the monster's body, examining it. It was very familiar to me, and I think it had been one of the ones I'd seen as a child.

"Stay back, it's just knocked out," Zack said. I jumped a little, being startled out of my train of thought, and he laughed. "It could wake up and start chowing down on you!"

"Very funny..." I responded, only loud enough for him to hear me. He walked up and put his hand on my shoulder, looking down at the monster as well. "It doesn't even have any cuts," I noted aloud, and he nodded.

"Yeah..." He shrugged and stood up straight as though reciting something. "Use brings about wear, tear, and rust." He laughed a little, raising his sword. "So usually, I just hit with the blunt side."

"Really?" I asked, cocking my head at him, and he nodded. I took a moment to examine the sword in his hand. It really _was_ a nice blade. "I didn't know that." He gave me a pat on the shoulder and started to run ahead to catch up with Tifa and Sephiroth. I looked at the bird again before joining them.

The trip up Mt. Nibel took us a while. Even longer than I would have thought. There were a lot of monsters on the way, but once Sephiroth and Zack were both dispatching them, it was just as I expected, and I had very little need to fire off even a single bullet. The whole thing made me feel worse about being an infantryman. It was great to see both of my idols in action, and it sparked up hopes in me as though I were a kid again, but then I'd remember Tifa, and I could only think about how that should have been _me_ fighting to protect her. After a little while of traveling, everything started to look more or less the same. I figured it was lucky that we had a guide with us, but I couldn't help but wonder how Tifa learned the routes. Finally, we came upon something that stood out. There was a small hole in the ground, and something was glowing out of it. Around the hole, there were little deposits of a glowing, green mineral.

"What's this?" Zack asked, walking up close and examining it from different angles.

"A Mako spring," Sephiroth said, stepping up next to him. "Truly a marvel of nature." Tifa stared into it as though she had seen it before but was still in awe.

"It's so beautiful, but..." She paused, then looked up at him. "If we continue to siphon Mako energy, this spring will run dry one day, won't it?" I didn't like this question coming from her. I didn't really know what taking Mako energy would do to the planet, but that was what Shinra did, and I was worried that Sephiroth wouldn't take the comment so lightly.

"Materia are formed by condensing Mako energy," he said, calmly enough. "Naturally-formed materia are a rare sight indeed." Tifa looked like she felt ignored, but Zack spoke before she could.

"By the way," he said, gathering his words, "how is it that materia allow us to use magic?" I turned to look at Sephiroth, interested in the answer as well. Sephiroth just stared and frowned.

"You call yourself SOLDIER without knowing something that basic?" he said after a moment. Zack's expression turned to a scowl and he crossed his arms. "Materia contains the knowledge of the Ancients." Sephiroth continued. "Knowledge to control the power of this planet at will." He turned away to look back at the spring. "It is this knowledge that binds us to the planet and calls forth powerful magic."

"Magic..." Tifa put a hand to her chin, staring into the glow. "Such a mysterious power..." I looked at her, and then back at the spring. I'd never even heard of the Ancients before, but now wasn't the time to ask. As everyone started to move again, following Sephiroth, Zack lingered behind to walk with me.

"You've been awfully quiet," he said with his hands behind his head. I made sure we were walking a good distance behind Tifa before I responded.

"Yeah..." I said, smiling at him and hoping he noticed, despite my helmet. "I guess I'm still taking this all in."

"Well, me too." Zack shrugged his shoulders, turning his head to me. "It may not be my hometown, but we might encounter an old friend of mine." I cocked my head again.

"An old friend?"

"And Sephiroth thinks that Genesis will be here." He nodded, looking ahead.

"Genesis?" I echoed, knowing that wasn't a good sign. I began to worry for Tifa again.

"I thought the one we saw at Gold Saucer was a clone," he continued, "but Sephiroth seems to think he's the real deal." He looked at me as if to stress his next point. "And the two of them used to be friends." I considered this. Zack's old mentor, Angeal, used to be friends with Genesis too, and he ended up defecting. I stayed silent, in thought, and Zack didn't say anything else either. As we got closer to our destination, Mako springs became more frequent, and I figured that was why the company built a reactor there. Finally, around midday, we arrived. The reactor was tall, and ugly like the one in Coral. It was built purely for maximum efficiency, and made no attempt to hide the pipes and steam vents. The only thing that came close to aesthetic was the Shinra logo by the door. Sephiroth climbed the stairs to the entrance first, and Tifa ran up to Zack who was about to follow.

"I want to go inside and look, too!" she said. Zack opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, Sephiroth turned around and answered for him.

"This is a top-secret facility." He shook his head. "Non-Shinra personnel are not permitted inside."

"But...!" Tifa complained, looking very unappreciated. Sephiroth turned his attention on me.

"Keep the young lady safe," he told me. I was disappointed to hear that. I couldn't deny that I was interested in actually seeing the inside of one of those places, but I also couldn't deny Sephiroth's order. I turned to look at Tifa, and she was staring at me like it was all my fault somehow. Zack looked at Tifa, then at me, and he finally turned to climb the staircase himself. It looked almost like he was disappointed that I couldn't go in as well. As the two disappeared inside, Tifa tried to follow anyway. I felt like she'd recognize my voice if I said anything, so instead I just ran to block her path, holding my hand up and shaking my head. She looked simply furious, stomping her foot on the ground, and for the first time in that mission, I was actually glad to be wearing my helmet. At least she was only mad at the infantryman. She turned away in a huff, planting her hands on her hips. I supposed that for now, I was back to waiting. And as I stood there, I could swear I kept seeing movement out of the corner of my eye...


	23. A SOLDIER's Home Part 4

**Zack**

We'd arrived at the Nibelheim reactor around midday. The trip up the mountain was smooth enough, but I figured that was because me and Sephiroth were both very well trained. When we had to leave Cloud and Tifa behind outside the reactor, I couldn't say I wasn't just a little bit worried. There didn't seem to be too many monsters around though, so my worry was probably misplaced. Also, I couldn't get it out of my mind that we might just walk into that reactor and run into one of the old SOLDIERs we've been expecting this whole time. When we _did_ go inside, it appeared that we were the only people there. That was the first odd thing about that place. I'd been inside only a couple of reactors in the past, but they usually had at least a few people stationed there, inside or out. This one was empty, but I figured that was probably due to the monster problem that brought us there. However, it was also set up in a very different way from the others I'd been to, with twelve pod-like devices divided by a staircase that led to a door lit by green light. I didn't actually stop to look around, because Sephiroth didn't stop, and continued on to walk up the stairs. When I reached the top, I noticed a sign above the lit, metal door, and I read the word out loud.

"JENOVA... interesting," I said, looking it over. "The door is... sealed, of course." I turned away from it, taking a few steps back to the stairs. I wondered why that sounded familiar to me, then I stopped suddenly as it came back. "Jenova...?" I said in a gasp, turning to look back over the sign again. Sephiroth had said his mother's name was Jenova. I felt a chill run down my back as I turned around to catch his reaction, but he was walking back down the stairs as though he hadn't seen it. He got the bottom and started to examine one of the pods, so I moved to join him.

"This is the cause of the malfunction." He said, pausing before he continued, "This section is broken." He looked at me as I stepped off the stairs, "Zack, go seal the valve." I wondered why he didn't just do it himself, but I figured that giving him a hard time right then would be a bad idea. I watched him stare at the pod as I walked by, surprisingly still. "Why did it break?" He wondered aloud, and I walked up to the valve on the wall.

"There we go..." I said, giving it a few hard twists until I heard a steaming sound and a click, "Should be all better now." I turned around and saw Sephiroth walking from pod to pod, before stopping in front of another one. I cocked my head and approached him from behind. He was looking into a small, glass window on the device, and then, noticing my presence, stepped out of the way so that I could see. I walked over and leaned in close to the window. It took me a second to register what I was looking at, and then I gasped and pulled away. There was something in the pod. Something with a face like a monster, floating in mako. "What is that...?" I said, trying to relax my nerves. Sephiroth was quiet for a moment.

"You average SOLDIER members are mako-infused humans," he responded, and I couldn't help but to look back at him, questioningly. I wondered what he meant by average. "You're enhanced, but you're still human." He paused and turned his attention back on the pod. "But then, what are those things?" I looked back at the pod as well. "Their mako energy levels are exponentially higher than yours."

"Are they... monsters?" I asked, but Sephiroth stayed silent. I heard him turn and walk away, so I turned around to follow. I wondered if I'd just said something very wrong. He stopped, and his head was lowered. I kept some distance between the two of us.

"Yes," he said, finally, still facing away. "The Shinra scientist Hojo was the one who created them." Then he turned around to face me, and something fierce was in his eyes. "Abominations spawned by mako energy... That's what monsters are."

"You said 'average' member," I mentioned after a moment. "What about you?" He stared at me, eyes drifting slowly to the side. Then, his body jerked. It was something small, like a twitch or a flinch, but it broke through his usual, steadfast demeanor. Then it was stronger. He lurched back and gripped his hand on his forehead, then turned away, stumbling and holding his head. I'd never seen anything like that happen to Sephiroth, and I ran to him, startled.

"Hey, Sephiroth!" I said, trying to look him in the eye as he continued to step forward. I stepped with him, and then all of a sudden he launched his arm out, shoving me away from him. I tripped and hopped a foot down onto a lower ledge, managing to keep myself from falling over. I turned back around to watch him, more worried than angry.

"Could it be... that I...?" Sephiroth said, looking at his hands, "...was created the same way?" I felt another chill. I didn't like his wording one bit. What did he mean, 'created'? He lowered his arms to his sides. "Am I the same as these monsters?" He stayed silent after that, and so did I. I waited for him to continue, to doubt what he just said. He couldn't have been a monster. At least, I didn't think so. After a good deal of silence, I built the courage to walk up behind him again.

"Hey..." I said, and his body jerked again as though I broke him out of a deep thought. Another silence ensued, but then his head rose and he began to speak.

"I knew, ever since I was a child..." he said, still facing away from me. There was fear behind his words, confusion. Not like anything I'd heard from him in the past. "I was not like the others. I knew mine was a special existence." He turned to one of the damaged pods. Steam broke free from the device, and I tensed as it began to open up. "But this..." he continued, watching as the monster's body fell limply from the machine. "This was not what I meant." He sounded angrier as he said that, but then hung his head again, raising his hands up again in front of his face. "Am I... a human being?"

"No such luck." A voice came from above, and Sephiroth didn't even flinch. "You are a monster." I turned to look at where the voice was coming from, just in time to be struck by a large fireball. I yelled in pain, dropping down on the ground behind me. Another fireball shot at Sephiroth, but he blocked the attack with just his hand. Then, Genesis lowered down onto the stairs near me, one black wing extending to his left. I watched one of the dark feathers fall to the floor, and then winced up at the man. His attention was not directed at me. "Sephiroth..." he said, receiving a glance over a shoulder. "You were the greatest monster created by the Jenova Project."

"Genesis..." I groaned, holding my chest. I felt I had to do something. "So you are alive!" He slowly turned his attention to me, smiling down as he spoke.

"I suppose I am, if you can call this living," he responded, touching the side of his face. The skin looked slightly aged under his hand, and a few of the strands of his hair had turned white. He was still degrading.

"What is the Jenova Project?" Sephiroth said, determined. I figured that there was no way for me to stop him from asking, but that was the last thing I needed. Genesis grinned.

"The Jenova Project..." He turned to look back at Sephiroth, who was now facing towards him, "was the term used for all experiments..." he let the words sink in, "relating to the use of Jenova's cells."

"My mother's... cells?" Sephiroth questioned, turning away. Genesis raised his arms to the sides.

"Poor little Sephiroth..." He said, staring at the back of the man's head. "You've never actually met your mother. You've only been told her name, no?" He took a seat down on the stairs, still smiling, and I really wished I had the strength to get up and wipe that smile off his face. "I don't know what images you've conjured up in your head, but..."

"Genesis, no!" I grunted, wanting to do anything to stop him from talking.

"Jenova," he continued over me, louder and with more purpose, "was excavated from a two-thousand-year-old rock layer." He shut his eyes, smiling again, and let the pause effect Sephiroth before his next words. "She's a monster." Sephiroth took a sharp inhale, stepping back. He looked frightened again, and then saddened, turning away. "Sephiroth..." Genesis started back up. "I need your help. My body is continuing to degrade." Sephiroth stayed silent, and Genesis rose to his feet. "SOLDIER first class Sephiroth!" he raised his voice, and Sephiroth stood tall, his focus returning. "Jenova Project G gave birth to Angeal..." I focused on the name. Was Angeal created too? "...and monsters like myself. Jenova Project S..."

"S...?" I repeated to myself. I had heard of Project G. I was filled in on it while I was chasing after Professor Hollander, but I'd never heard anything of Project S. Genesis continued.

"...used the remains of countless failed experiments to create a perfect monster."

"What do you want of me?" Sephiroth sighed, shaking his head.

"Your traits cannot be copied unto others. Your genes can't be diffused." Genesis explained, "Therefore, your body cannot degrade." He grinned and, after a pause, walked up next to Sephiroth. "Share your cells with me." He looked over at Sephiroth. He'd still been in shock from all the new information. "My friend, your desire," he recited, lifting a fruit from his pocket, "is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess!" The fruit was a Banora White, a kind of apple that grew in Genesis' and Angeal's hometown before it was destroyed. He held it forward, offering it to Sephiroth, offering him to join. Slowly, Sephiroth turned to face him, staring at the apple. Then, he looked to the sign above the lit door that bore his mother's name. Something seemed to shine in his eyes, and he let out a sharp breath.

"Whether your words..." Sephiroth finally said, "are lies created to deceive me..." he paused and turned his eyes back to Genesis, "or the truth, that I have sought all my life... it makes no difference." He rose his hand and knocked the apple from Genesis', letting it drop to the floor. Genesis' expression turned shocked, almost blank. "You will rot." He turned and walked away, leaving the reactor as Genesis spoke.

"I see..." Genesis said, placing his hands together to fill the void left from the apple. "Perfect monster, indeed." He sounded angry, and looked down upon me for just a moment before turning away to recite his poem again. "When the war of the beasts brings about the world's end, the goddess descends from the sky." He reached his arm up toward the ceiling. "Wings of light and dark spread afar. She guides us to bliss," He turned to walk out as well, "...her gift everlasting." Then I remembered Cloud and Tifa, and how Genesis was heading in their direction.

"No," I said, grasping my stomach as I forced myself to my feet, "stop!" I ran after him, stumbling on my feet, leaving the Banora White on the stairs behind me.

The metal door scrapped closed behind me as I left the reactor. Genesis was already gone, but I arrived just in time to see one of the two clones he left behind take a rifle shot at Cloud. The bullet hit him hard, and he staggered back before falling forward on his chest. As Cloud was unconscious, Tifa still stood tall, presumably having been guarded from the attack. Now she struck a battle pose and faced the armed copies. I knew I had to step in and do something, even _before_ the two gunmen were joined by a third, monstrous clone with a scythe. I took another look back at Cloud. There was no way that I'd be able to tend to him before the fight.

"Damn it..." I said, drawing the sword from my back. I ran down the stairs as fast as I could, past Tifa and toward my foes. The two gunmen stepped forward, leaving the monster in back to watch ominously. That situation was taken care of pretty quickly. Even the clones of Genesis couldn't take a few strong hits to the head with the Buster Sword, and I wasn't playing around. Not even a bullet was released before the gunmen fell to the ground, but the monster in back wasn't intimidated at all. It stared me down, holding the scythe over its shoulder, and I had enough of waiting. I did my usual thing, picking my blade up into the air and charging, but the clone was ready. A small, black mass formed over its hand, and was tossed at me. Due to the momentum I had from the charge I was unable to dodge it, and a strong force slammed me to the ground upon impact. I groaned, trying to raise my arms from the rocky earth. It must have used one of those gravity spells I'd learned of in the past.

The creature loomed over me, and I only regained the strength to move just in time to avoid being skewered. Its scythe stuck into the ground, and I rose, striking at its side as I did. Stumbling back, the creature managed to keep its footing, but groaned in pain. The noise it made was odd. I could hear trace amounts of Genesis' voice, but it was like there was several monsters groaning over it. Shaking off the effects of the spell, I ready my sword again. Dodging another dark mass, I came in close to the clone and struck it several times in a rapid succession. For a moment, it raised its scythe and I thought it could still fight, but the breathe left its body and it fell back, landing hard on the rocks. When I was thoroughly convinced the creature was dead, I spun around and ran back to check on Cloud. Tifa was already knelt down by his side, moving her hand down his chest and away from where she'd just checked his pulse.

"He... tried to protect me..." She turned her head to look at me as I knelt down beside her.

"I know," I said, taking relief in the rise and fall of Cloud's chest. He was still breathing. I knew there was nothing I could do right there and then, so I looked to Tifa and readied myself to go. "Tifa, stay close to me." Much to my surprise, the next thing she did was pull Cloud up and lift him to his feet, supporting him for the walk back. His eyes were open slightly, but he didn't seem to be all there.

"I can carry him if you'd like," I said, stretching my arm out as she steadied herself on her feet.

"I got him," she insisted, starting to walk. "You just protect us on the walk back. It's gonna be a while..." She was right on both accounts. It didn't make sense for me to be the one carrying Cloud back. Not with all the monsters that we're lurking about. She seemed to be doing a pretty good job, anyway. She was even holding out by the time we got back to that bridge we'd crossed early in the morning. Luckily, we didn't run into _too_ much trouble on the way back, and the handful of remaining clones were easily dispatched. The hour was growing late as we came back into town, and there was no one there to greet us. Not even a certain other first class who made the trip with us.

"Where did Sephiroth go...?" I said, my eyes scanning the area. Tifa took Cloud to a close by wall, letting him lean against it and stand on his own. He was apparently more awake then, and he chose to hunch over, placing his hands by his knees for support. Tifa turned to me, letting out a final breathe of relief for the end of our trip down the mountain.

"Something the matter?" she asked, and I looked back at her. I knew she wouldn't like my answer before I said it.

"Sorry, I can't tell you." She made a face at the reply.

"I'm not surprised." She sighed, exaggerating it with the fall of her shoulders. Then she shrugged and walked passed me, stopping just in front of me to look back. "I'll ask around town about Sephiroth." And then she ran off. She actually _ran_ with energy like she hadn't just carried a man down a mountain.

"Thanks, Tifa." I said as she left, but she probably didn't hear me. I looked back to Cloud, watching his shoulders rise and fall with his deep breaths. He must have been really tired, and I couldn't blame him. I walked up beside him and took up Tifa's last position to help him to the room in the inn. As we walked, I hoped with all my might that Sephiroth's refusal of Genesis was the end of it, but something in my gut just didn't feel right.

Was Sephiroth really... a monster...?


	24. A SOLDIER's Home Part 5

**Cloud**

The first thing I saw as I opened my eyes was a bedpost down by my feet, and past that, the Buster Sword leaned against a table. I was back in the inn in Nibelheim. I couldn't really remember how I'd gotten there, or at least how I'd gotten in bed. The entire second half of my day was sort of a blur. I just remembered defending Tifa, and not much after that. Though, I had enough scattered thoughts to feel comfortable enough about Tifa's safety. Leaning up on the bed, I realized that I wasn't on my own, but on the bed that Zack slept on the previous night. I considered this, but I was interrupted by a pain that shot through my right shoulder. Then I remembered. I'd gotten hit with a bullet, but luckily enough it seemed that my armor had taken most of the impact. I favored my left arm as I pushed myself to an upright sitting position. As I did, I noticed Zack sitting on the bed next to mine, staring at me. Embarrassed by my condition, I looked away, pulling my knees up closer to me and resting my arms on them.

"Tifa's safe," he said, and paused as I looked back at him, "don't worry." Hearing her name, I took note that my helmet was off. It didn't matter then, because Zack seemed to be the only other person in the room, but I hoped that she was gone by the time it came off.

"If only I were SOLDIER..." I said, once again loathing my rank. The following silence carried longer than I thought it would, and I heard Zack make a noise. I looked at him, and he looked upset. "Zack?" I said, feeling as though I _needed_ a response. There was another long pause.

"SOLDIER is like a den of monsters," he said finally, too serious for comfort. "Don't go inside." He shook his head, and I couldn't help but wonder what was on his mind. That wasn't like Zack at all. I wondered if it was something from inside the reactor.

"What happened?" I asked, shifting my position on the bed. He stayed silent again for a long moment, and his eyes were shifting around, not on me, but like he was somewhere else.

"I don't know, man..." he said, swallowing. Then he leaned back, shifting his legs up onto the bed. "I thought I knew, but..." He looked like he was finishing a few thoughts in his head, and then he finally looked up to meet my eyes. After another momentary pause, he shifted again, this time dropping himself back down onto the bed and letting out a sound of tired frustration. "Ahhhhh!" I watched him lay there, and I wished that there was something I could do to help. I didn't like seeing him that way. Once again I started to feel useless, but I knew he wouldn't want me to do that either. If I'd had a little more confidence, I probably would've moved to sit next to him, but I didn't. He finally broke his own silence. "By the way," he started, "do you know Tifa?" His emphasis was on the word 'know', and I figured that there was a hidden question in there. I turned away, returning to my more reserved position.

"Sort of..." I said, unable to get myself to tell the whole truth.

"Talked to her?" Zack went on, and I raised my head, looking further in his direction but still not at him.

"No..." I shook me head, thinking to myself about how awful it was that I hadn't. I just couldn't get myself to do it.

"I'm sensing some issues here..." Zack said, leaning up a little on the bed. "Shouldn't you do something?" I didn't answer him. Lowering my head, I averted my eyes from his. I didn't know how I could ever expect to get into SOLDIER if I didn't even have the guts to talk to my childhood friend. I heard Zack sit up on his bed, and then silence. "I'm one to talk..." I was too far in thought to get myself to look at him, and after a second I heard him stand from the bed. Zack walked slowly out into the middle of the room, and I raised my head to watch him as he talked. "I'm with SOLDIER, so... fighting's all I do." He almost sounded like he was quoting someone else. It didn't sound like Zack at all. "Sorting things out is someone else's job." He took a few more steps toward the window, coming close to the table where the Buster Sword was resting. "What's going on? Who's the enemy?" His voice was gaining in volume and he turned quickly. "It makes no difference to me!" He grabbed his sword suddenly, lifting it above his head as though he planned on attacking the air around him.

I couldn't help but startle, but Zack didn't do anything after that. He just froze that way, thinking, and finally lowered the sword softly down in front of him with a sigh, pressing the flat side against his head. I'd seen him do that once or twice in the past to calm himself, sometimes before a speech. The sword must have meant a lot to him. I supposed it _did_ come from his mentor before he died. He even said he usually only hit with the blunt side to keep it from wearing down. I figured that was probably what he was doing every time I watched him fight.

"Hey, Zack?" I said, trying to think of something to take his mind off of whatever was bothering him. "You know, I've never seen you use that." He eased the sword away from his head, letting his breath calm as his face turned to consideration. I watched his eyes as they drifted, and his lips as they parted ever so slightly. During the long quiet, he even mouthed something as he thought, but I couldn't tell what. His eyes focused back on his sword, and traveled up the length of the blade.

"This is a symbol of my dreams and honor," he finally said, holding it out in front of him. "No... It's more..." A long needed smile finally formed across his face and his voice softened. "That's right... I had almost forgotten." Then he turned his smile to me, and I sat up more on my bed. "Thank you, Cloud."

"Huh?" I said, as that was the only thing I could get out of my mouth. When Zack said my name just then, it felt like it had more meaning than it ever had before. Something I said to him was the right thing. He turned away to set his sword back down.

"Right!" He said as he stared at the sword, swinging his arms with a new energy. He turned back my direction, moving his arms around just before doing a few squats next to the bed I was on. I turned to watch him, smiling myself. Then he stopped. "I'm gonna crash," he said abruptly. "Night!" Falling on his bed, Zack threw his arms behind his head, and then shifted them out to the sides. That new behavior was very strange, but I found it preferable to the way he was before. I went to say goodnight, but it found its way out in a sort of halfhearted wave. Looking back to his sword, I couldn't help but wonder exactly what I said that helped, if anything, and exactly what was bothering him to begin with. I supposed it didn't really matter though, as long as he was happy. I looked back at him with a smile, and for a while, I watched him sleep.

I tried sleeping, but I couldn't. I knew it must have been late, as the others had returned and went to sleep themselves, except for Sephiroth. Despite the time, I had to get up and walk a little before I'd be tired, so I sneaked out of my bed and out of the inn. Nibelheim was always very peaceful at night. The only sounds were the sloshing of water inside the well, the remnants of the wind blowing down from the mountains, and the occasional creak of the old wood that some of the town was made from. I ran my hand along the well as I passed it by, thinking about Tifa. I was still too weak to save her when she needed it, but I felt like I might be able to one day. One day I might be able to be that hero she always wanted, and I took some solace in that. But I knew that my thoughts for Tifa had changed. I wanted to be there for her, I wanted to protect her, and I wanted her to never get hurt, but I also wanted to be with Zack, and when I got shot on the mountain, I couldn't help but worry about him when I fell.

I moved passed the well, locking my eyes on a small house that faced it. It had been such a long time since I'd seen my house. I knew that within those walls, my mother was there, right then. I jumped as I heard someone walk up behind me. I didn't turn around, as I expected Zack, but instead I heard Dallert's voice.

"Get the shifts confused?" He huffed softly as sort of a nighttime laugh. "I'm the night watch tonight."

"Couldn't sleep," I said over my shoulder, turning my eyes back to my house as he stepped up beside me.

"Your home?" he asked, gesturing to the place.

"Yeah." I nodded, and he made a noise to acknowledge me. After a pause, he looked over.

"You really should go say hi," he suggested, and I knew he was right. "I mean, not tonight but..." I knew that I should see my mom while I was there. I _wanted_ to see her, but I was sort of... scared. Then, I thought that maybe that fear would be the first thing I'd conquer. Maybe I _would _go stop in. Then, maybe, I might go and say hi to Tifa as well. I nodded to myself. It was decided.

"Thanks, Dallert," I said, patting him on the shoulder as I turned back to the inn.

"For what...?" I heard him say, but I was too far in thought to respond. I wouldn't act that night, but now it was settled in my head.

I knew what I was going to do...


	25. A SOLDIER's Home Part 6

**A Heart For My Nobody says: **

**Hey all! Twenty-five chapters! I'm still doing my best to keep the updates coming every four to six days for you. I haven't let a whole week pass so far.. at least I don't think that I have. Reviews have really gone down in number though. I have a lot of regular reviewers that I'd really like to thank for their diligence and their enjoyment of the story! You guys are great! And to everyone else, thank you so much for reading, and I'd love to hear from you too! Feedback is one of my favorite things (positive or negative), and it's my biggest form of motivation to keep writing. So, the more reviews I get, the less likely I am to get into a writing slump one of these days, y'know? And I'm still responding to every one of them that's not left anonymously (although I love those ones too). Anyway, thanks for listening! You guys are great for reading this far. I hope you continue to enjoy the chapters to come!**

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**Zack**

I'd almost lost my way. With Genesis showing up, and Sephiroth disappearing, and with all this talk of 'monsters' and being 'created', I'd almost forgotten what it meant to be a SOLDIER. Just as I felt like I was at the end of my rope, Cloud said something to me. It was something small, and to most people, unimportant, but to me it was so much more. He told me he hadn't ever seen me use my sword. That was something I'd said to Angeal a long time ago, and he responded by telling me that use brings about wear, tear, and rust. Angeal had always told me to hold onto my honor and my dreams, and when the day came that he grew a wing and was told that he was a monster, when he began to degrade, he gave that honor to me. He gave me the Buster Sword. Angeal's wing wasn't dark like Genesis', but a brilliant white. I never believed that was the wing of a monster, and I felt like even then, even when I'd struck him down myself, even when he'd been reported killed so long ago, he was still watching over me. He was guarding me, lending me help when I needed it. That wasn't the wing of a monster... it was the wing of an Angel.

SOLDIER wasn't just about fighting and doing what you were told. It wasn't about monsters, or about everyone turning on each other. It was about dreams, and honor. It didn't matter what course anyone else took. I would still hold onto my honor, I would still save people, and if I grew a wing too, I would use it for the good of others. Everything was a choice, and I wouldn't let myself get pulled down by a fate built from fear or anger. Everything was a choice, and I would choose freedom.

When I woke the next morning, I had a lot of energy. Hopefully, I thought, it would be enough for me to get myself to go find Sephiroth. I stood up from my bed and stretched. It looked like everyone else had gotten up and left, other than Cloud, who was sitting on his bed with a cell phone. He put the phone away when he noticed I was watching.

"Morning!" I said, giving him a wave. He smiled, but looked like he didn't get too much sleep. Getting nothing else out of him, I decided to do a few squats in the center of the room.

"Feeling better?" Cloud asked, watching me bob up and down. I stopped my exercise and rolled my shoulders.

"Loads better," I said, waking up to him. His eyes continued to follow me, then he smiled and looked away. "I'm gonna go into town," I continued. "Wanna join me?" He leaned forward, resting his hands on his knees.

"Let me get a little more rest..." he said, and I shrugged.

"Alright, I'll meet you out there." I waved, jogging to the door of the room. I looked back when I heard him say something.

"Zack." H paused, looking like there was something on his mind. "I'll be down in a few minutes." I nodded at him with a smile, and ran out, keeping a fast pace even as I moved down the stairs. When I got to the bottom, I flipped open my own cell phone to see what time it was, and noticed that I'd gotten an email from Tifa the previous night. I cocked my head at the phone, taking a second to remember exactly when Tifa got my number, and then I opened the mail.

_ Subject: Is he all right? – From: Tifa_

_ Is that guy all right? I'm a little worried, because it looked like he got hurt pretty bad. I'm glad _

_ you were there. Thank you, Zack. I had heard of SOLDIER and how tough they are. I hope we _

_ can talk a little bit more about SOLDIER one of these days, because there's something I want to _

_ ask you._

I wondered why she didn't ask me what she wanted to in the email, but it didn't really matter. I figured I'd be seeing her soon enough. Just as I thought that, Tifa came running through the doors of the inn, and stopped in front of me.

"Sephiroth is apparently at Shinra Manor," she said, sparing no words. I thought for a second about where that was.

"That big mansion?" I asked, feeling a buzz come from my pocket where I'd just put my phone.

"Yes," She answered. "Shinra has owned it for a long time." She watched as I took out my phone and flipped it open. I supposed it was kind of a rude thing to do while we were talking, but I hadn't really thought about it at the time. I had another email, this time from Cloud. When I looked up to finish talking with Tifa, she was already gone, so I brought my attention back to the phone.

_Subject: If you'd like... – From: Cloud_

_ Hey, do you want to come over to my house? I want you to try Mom's cooking. The thing is, I _

_ haven't been home yet since I've been here. I hadn't been able to make up my mind about it, but _

_ I decided that I should show my face... but going home alone is a bit uncomfortable, so I was _

_ hoping you could join me._

I smiled to myself. Cloud was finally gonna go home, and he wanted me to come with him. That was enough in itself to make me wish I didn't have anything else to do that day, but it seemed that a trip to the Shinra Manor was in order first. Stepping outside, I scanned the area for Tifa. She'd really disappeared on me. The only person I saw out there was the other infantryman we'd had with us. He took notice of me, saluted, and walked passed me into the inn, presumably to sleep off the effects from his night shift. I took a few steps into the center of town by the well, and my phone went off again. This time it was ringing. As soon as I flipped it open and put the speaker to my ear, I heard a sound from the other side.

"Hell-lloooo?" a girly voice said, almost mockingly. I stopped walking next to the well.

"Aerith?" I smiled, not expecting her voice. I hadn't received too many calls from her in the past.

"I finally got through!" She sounded happy. I felt bad, but I knew I'd have to cut that phone call short. I wanted to save all the happy things until _after_ I'd gotten matters settled with Sephiroth.

"Yeah..." I said, pulling the phone away from my face to look at it. I wished I could see her on the other end. I really _did_ miss her. Then I noticed Cloud stepping out of the inn, looking around the area for me, and I put the phone back to my ear. "Uh, listen..." I said, choosing my words. "Now's not the best time. I'll call you later."

"No, no," she replied, sounding disappointed, "you don't have to..."

"Okay," I said, only feeling worse. "I'll come visit." I waited a moment for her to respond.

"I'll be here."

"I'll see you," I assured her, trying to smile with my voice. "I promise."

"Goodbye, Zack," she said after a hum, and I clicked the phone shut with a sigh.

"Aerith," I said to myself, gripping my hand close to my chest. "Wait for me just a little while longer." Then I turned to Cloud. He was a distance away, but he'd spotted me. I smiled and jogged over.

"Tifa says that Sephiroth's in the mansion," I told him, and he nodded.

"Yeah, Dallert told me," he said, gesturing back at the inn. I thought I'd heard him say that name before. I guessed it was one of the other guys we'd had with us. "Shinra Manor is up the stairs straight ahead, then to the left." He gestured again. "Come with me!" He turned and ran ahead. I was surprised by his energy. He looked tired when I'd gotten up that morning. I ran after him and up the stairs. Soon, the large manor was looming before us. Despite being a mansion, the place looked like a dump. It apparently hadn't been cared for in a while. As we approached, Cloud slowed to a walk, and I had time to admire the spiderwebs on the window.

"Eerie..." I thought aloud, and Cloud said nothing, pushing open the doors. The inside was just as bad, if not worse. It was dimly lit, and everything was covered in dust or cobwebs. Cloud walked over to a set of stairs leading to the second level.

"Sephiroth apparently went to the second-floor room on the right." He turned to me, repeating what he'd been told.

"Right," I said as we walked up. The stairs creaked beneath my feet. I found it hard to believe that Shinra had owned a place like that. I wondered what it was used for. Cloud led me to the right, and through a few more rooms. They were decorated with little more than the bookcases that lined the walls. We came to a room with a strange wall made of bricks. It wasn't papered or painted, and there were little depressions that outlined what was probably a secret passage. Cloud stopped.

"Something's wrong with Sephiroth." He frowned, and I could tell he was worried. I was too. "The door to the underground passage was unlocked, and I think he went in, but..." He turned his eyes warily to the door.

"I'll go talk to him," I said, and as I walked, he moved to follow. "It's probably better if you stay here."

"Oh..." He stopped with a sigh, and I put my hand on his shoulder.

"Don't worry." I smiled and he looked up. "I'll be back soon."

With that, I opened the passage and stepped inside. It was even darker in there. It looked to be a tunnel carved into the earth, and it was lit only by lanterns. I wondered how long they'd been burning. A long spiral, wooden staircase took me deeper down into the passage. I went deeper still with a ladder I found down there. The whole place became a bit more damp, and I couldn't help but be reminded of a tomb. Then I saw the shadow of a creature running, startled, away from me.

"Monsters?" I said to myself, putting my hand to my sword, just in case. "What _is_ this place?" Looking around, I saw a number of doors, but most of them were wooden and worn. The most direct and likely door for me to take was straight ahead at the end of the tunnel. It was a large and metal one, more protective then the rest. Easing my way there, I managed to make it to the door with only a hiss from one of the monsters nearby. I pushed the door open, stepped inside, and closed it behind me.

Then I found myself in a room that looked nothing like the previous ones. The walls were made of a dull, gray brick instead of earth, and they were lined with many bookcases similar to the ones above. Pacing at the end of a long hall, I saw Sephiroth, book in hand, and as I approached, I could hear him reading aloud.

"A life form in a state of suspended animation, excavated from a two-thousand-year-old stratum," he said, not even looking up as I came close. "Professor Gast named this life form Jenova..." There was that name again. Jenova. It must have been a different person. I cocked my head as Sephiroth came closer to me and continued to read. "Date: X/X/XX – Jenova verified as an Ancient... Date: X/X/XX – Jenova Project approved. Mako Reactor 1 authorized for use..."

"Sephiroth?" I said, wondering if he'd even noticed me there. He turned around and paced the other direction, back down the hall.

"My mother's name, Jenova... The Jenova Project..." he continued, flipping another page in the book. "Could this be a coincidence...?" Then he let his arms drop, still holding the book in his hand, and turned his gaze up toward the ceiling. "Professor Gast... Why didn't you tell me?" He hung his head and I walked closer to him. "Why did you die...?"

"Hey..." I said, walking up next to him. He still hadn't returned to reading the book, nor had he acknowledged me. "Sephiroth, what's going on?"

"I would like to be alone," he said after a moment.

"It might help to talk about it," I pressed, but he said nothing. When the silence continued, I raised up my hand, considering another attempt, but I decided against it. "Okay," I said, stepping back. "Just know that I'll be around if you need someone to talk to." As I expected, he remained silent, so I turned and walked out.

I didn't understand what was going on. Sephiroth turned Genesis down, which was a good thing, but I'd never seen him act like this, _ever_. He was a man possessed, and something inside of me still worried that the worst was yet to come. Even if that was the case, however, I decided that I wouldn't let it get to me, and I'd take whatever was to come as it came. SOLDIER wouldn't be a den of monsters anymore. Not for me.


	26. A SOLDIER's Home Part 7

**Cloud**

Standing around in Shinra Manor was too much for me to handle at the time. There were too many bumps and creaks of boards coming from below and above, too many things that sounded like whispers. It was one of those environments in which it was really easy to feel like things were crawling on you, and when I already had the worried feeling in my gut about Sephiroth locking himself away and Zack disappearing after him, I couldn't stop fidgeting. After some time went by, I had to give up and clear out of there, waiting for Zack out in the sunlight. There was such a strong difference in the feeling of being inside that creepy old place and being out in the fresh air of my hometown. It wasn't long until Zack sauntered out either. He was watching his feet while he walked, looking very preoccupied, but as he came close and turned his head up to me, he perked up and smiled away his melancholy. That's when he said:

"Is tonight good?"

Zack was taking me up on the offer to go see my mother with me. The whole idea of it still made me nervous, but it was out it the open then, and I couldn't take it back. That sort of certainty actually took a weight off my shoulders, because I knew I couldn't chicken out at the last moment. That, however, didn't help much when it came to preparing myself. Mothers were a strange dynamic in one's life. They were the sort of person that when you lived with them, you didn't care if you were dressed or groomed, but when you were returning to visit them after years, your appearance just never seemed quite good enough. As this was technically a mission and not a visit, I had nothing else to wear but my uniform, and my hair stuck up all over... more than usual. It probably came from wearing my helmet all the time. While Zack did some squats in the adjacent room, I prepped myself in front of a mirror until it felt kind of shameful, and then I stepped out to see him.

"Lookin' sharp!" he said, halting the exercise. I scratched at the back of my neck, wondering exactly how aware he was of all my 'grooming'.

"You think so?" I asked, using my hand to make sure I didn't have a tag sticking out of my shirt. "I wish I had something else to wear..."

"No way!" He grinned. "Mom's love to see their boys in uniform. How do _I_ look?"

"You're fine," I said, not paying too much attention to his question. I didn't think he'd actually done anything at all to his appearance, but it didn't matter anyway. He wasn't the one who was going to be judged. "Well..." I paused. "I guess it's about time to go."

"Lead on," he said, gesturing to the door, so I did. It would actually be pretty nice to see my mom again, I thought as I walked down the stairs and out the front door. At least it would be nice once I got over the initial discomfort of feeling like I'd disappoint her in some way. As I got closer, it was all I could do to keep my stomach from churning with nervousness. Zack looked the house over when we stopped in front of it.

"Well..." I hesitated again. "This is it." Zack put his hand on my shoulder for reassurance and I stepped forward and knocked on the door. He removed the hand as we heard footsteps approaching the door. I was excited and nervous all at once, and I felt like my heart would beat right out of my chest. Then the door opened, and there she was. She was a vibrant woman, and her hair was blond like mine. She smiled at us when she opened the door, and I noticed her face wrinkle in a few places that it didn't used to. "Uh...?" I tried to say something, but nothing came out.

"Ye-s?" she said, and the tone of her voice was so familiar to me. Her expression slowly changed as she looked at me. "...Cloud?" I realized that I hadn't been breathing. The moment was so surreal for me.

"...Yeah," I finally managed to say, and she pulled the door open the rest of the way. She came forward and wrapped her arms around me. I couldn't get myself to hug back yet.

"Welcome home, Cloud!" she said, squeezing me a little.

"Hi, mom," I responded after a moment, feeling awkward about Zack's presence.

"Come, come..." she said, pushing away from me, but keeping her hands on my arms. "Let me take a look at you!"

"Mom," I said, moving my arm to gesture behind me, and she took her arms away. "This is Zack Fair."

"Just Zack," he corrected me, reaching his hand out and taking my mother's in his.

"Oh yes. Nice to meet you!" she said, and looked back to me. "I heard there were SOLDIERs in town, but I didn't realize that you were with them." I smiled at her, but averted my eyes a bit. If there was anyone who could tell I was choosing not to say something, it was my mother. I didn't really feel like mentioning the difference in my rank versus Zack's, if she hadn't figured it out for herself. "Well, please come in," she continued, stepping inside. We stepped in after her, and Zack took right to looking over the place, up and down. So many memories came flooding back to me. I saw the downstairs bed where I used to rest, and the stove where my mom would cook me dinner every night. She was really quite good. She turned back around to look at us, clasping her hands in front of the white apron she wore. "I wish you'd called before coming. I would've tidied up a bit."

"No, the place looks great!" Zack said, turning about for a moment to take it all in.

"Well now, thank you," she said, blushing as she often did when somebody complimented her. "Can I get you something to eat, or...?"

"Actually..." I said, shifting on my feet, "I was hoping we could stay for dinner."

"Of course not!" She laughed. "I was going to offer you a piece of bread and kick you out." I was actually not used to my mom's own sarcasm anymore, but I knew she was joking. "Dinner _does_ count as something to eat. I'll definitely see what I can whip up!" She went to turn toward the kitchen, but stopped to stare at me a little longer. "Hmmm..."

"What...?" I asked, growing self-conscious of my appearance again.

"You look so handsome." She giggled, and I heard Zack chuckle a little to himself. I was glad that I was facing away from him, because I must have been turning red. "Please, make yourself at home," she said, looking back at him. Then she turned to the kitchen and started collecting some pots and pans.

"It's a nice place," Zack said, patting me on the shoulder as he walked by me. I watched him step up a couple of stairs to examine a large globe we had on display. It was something my father had brought home a long time ago. A few minutes went by, and everything was oddly silent. Zack was silent as he was in an unfamiliar house, and probably worried about the impression he'd give. My mom was cooking silently, most likely to let me and Zack talk, because we were in close proximity to each other. She looked up every now and then at me, probably wondering why finding a wall to lean on was my way of making myself at home. Zack took a seat on the stairs near me.

"Why don't you take off your shoes?" I heard my mom say, and the she turned to me. "You'll never get comfortable if you leave them on." I hesitated, but Zack smiled at me and somehow made me decide to follow her advice. She was right. As soon as I took off my shoes and felt my old wooden floor under my feet, everything felt much more natural to me. "So is this a SOLDIER uniform?" she asked, looking me over again. I sighed a little.

"...Mom," I started, wondering how to break the news to her, "I..."

"I'm sorry," she interrupted before I could continue. "You probably don't want to talk about your job on your free time." She moved something over the stove before looking back to me again. "It's just been so long, I don't know what to talk to you about." She glanced past me at Zack. "I don't mean to be rude to you, either. I'm not used to having guests."

"Oh, no, no!" Zack waved his arms. "You're not being rude. The food smells great, by the way." My mom giggled and blushed again, turning back to the pot.

"So..." She smiled and stretched the word. "How do you two know each other?"

"Mom, we work together." I said, pushing myself off the wall.

"Yes, I know." She nodded. "But you brought him to dinner at your house. There must be more than just a colleague there."

"Yeah, we've been on a number of missions together." Zack stood and stepped off the stairs. "Your son's pretty good."

"You said your name's Zack, right?" she asked while she stirred the food. "I'm sorry, but I don't hear too much about SOLDIER. Are you high ranks?"

"Yeah!" Zack said again, clutching his fist shut tightly in front of him. "First class. The top of the top!" I didn't really know why Zack was covering for me. Part of me just wanted to be out with the fact that I hadn't succeeded yet, but I was still happy to see that he'd do that for me. When he smiled at me, I couldn't help but smile back.

About ten minutes later, my mom was serving food on a table by the kitchen. Zack and I sat down, taking in the aroma. She'd made a stew, and the house smelled great. It reminded me of when I used to live there. Our bowls were empty, and she carried over the pot to serve us by ladle. That was something she'd always liked to do, and the oven mitt only made her look more like a mother. She served Zack first, and then me, pausing and giggling at me again.

"Doesn't he look handsome?" She laughed, turning her head back to Zack as she served herself. I tensed and lowered my head a bit as Zack laughed with her. He looked at me, but as I remained silent, he came up with an answer.

"Well, he gives me a run for my money." Zack grinned, leaning back in his seat and folding his arms behind his head. "Let's just say that we're the reason most of the guys keep their helmets on all the time."

"Oh, I'm sure." She laughed again, walking the pot back to the kitchen counter before turning to me. "You're not going to 'mom' me for this? Some son you are." She was joking again. "What, do I have to take out the baby pictures or something?"

"Please don't," I answered while Zack nodded. The two of them had only been in the same house for a few minutes and already they were teaming up on me. "I just figured that while I was in your house, you could talk about what you wanted."

"Oh, never give your mother that privilege... and it's _your_ house too." She took a seat with us, and Zack took that as his cue to start eating. "You were always so mature for your age."

"It's very good," Zack said, gesturing to his stew after making a pleased noise.

"Thank you," My mother said, taking a bite of it herself. Then I tasted it. For some reason, I felt that I had to wait and be the last one who tried the cooking. It was so familiar, and so good, but it brought back the awkward feeling of being home after all that time. My mother looked back and forth between us. "So, SOLDIERs been in town for a few days, right?" she asked, swallowing. "Why did you wait so long to visit?"

"Sorry," I said, looking up from my food. "We were pretty busy."

"We spent all day yesterday on the mountain," Zack added, and my mother paused before going back to her food.

"Hmmm..." she said as she considered the idea. I knew she was thinking back to when I was a kid, and I came down off of that mountain with an injured Tifa. She always said that she believed me about what happened that day. About how I followed Tifa even when the rest of her friends decided to turn back, and how I saved her when she was attacked by monsters, but it was still a touchy subject of conversation. "Well I hope you wore your helmets _then_."

From then on, we stayed mostly quiet, but it was a good kind of quiet. The air in my house was filled with such reminiscence of my childhood. All of it, the taste of the food, the sound of my mother's voice, the way the light reflected against the wooden floors... it was like I had stepped back into the past, or like I'd never left in the first place. Then there was Zack. He was so new compared to all of that, and still so welcomed. I'd only found myself thinking more about Zack since I'd come back to Nibelheim, and since I talked to him in the inn, and asked him to come home with me. I worried a little bit about my mother picking up on how I felt, being who she was. I wondered how she'd feel if she knew. I wondered how _Tifa _would feel...

As the time grew later, Zack and I readied ourselves to go back to the inn, saying goodbye to my mother.

"Oh, you're leaving?" she asked, stepping forward and giving me another hug.

"We have some people waiting on us," I said, putting one arm around her before she let go. "I'll come and visit again before we go, okay?"

"I'll be looking forward to it." She smiled, waving as we stepped out.

"It was nice to meet you!" Zack added, waving back.

"You too," she replied and the door closed. Zack turned to me and smiled, and I thought I probably gave him a confused look. Then we turned back to walk to the inn. Zack walked close to me, and I felt him take my hand in his as we walked. I got a shiver down my spine, and all of a sudden I felt very public. I couldn't help but glance back over my shoulder to make sure my mom wasn't watching us, and to eye the area for Dallert or Tifa, but we were alone. The town had been pretty quiet. Probably because of the number of monsters appearing around the outskirts. Finally, if only for the short walk we had back to the inn, I let myself relax and enjoy the touch of his hand. It was fond, and I knew he was telling me he had a nice time. I did too.

That night, I was tired, so I opted to go to sleep early. There was some discussion about what we'd do with the beds. We were now officially short one bed, because we'd already found out what the cause of the monsters was at the reactor, and there was no strong need for a night watch. Zack finally chose to try sleeping in one of the chairs by the table we had in the room.

"If Sephiroth can do it, I can!" was his excuse. I felt bad, but I knew there was no talking him out of it. I never ended up finding out how that went, though, because I was the first to sleep. The last things I remembered before drifting off were Zack's touch on my shoulder, and how he smiled and thanked me for inviting him, and my last few thoughts. I thought about how I actually had a nice time visiting home, and I thought about how I might even get myself to show my face to Tifa. I thought about how much I enjoyed having Zack there with me, but most of all, I thought about how I really wanted to find a good time to kiss him again.


	27. A SOLDIER's Home Part 8

**Zack**

In all my SOLDIER pride, I ended up volunteering myself to sleep on a wooden chair for the night. I _had_ slept in worse places, but it was usually more of an issue of me being so tired that I could drop anywhere and sleep like a baby, whereas right then, I had too much energy to sleep, never mind in a chair. So when the others had passed out, I eased myself out of the room and went for a little walk. I originally tried looking for the truck we'd drove in on, because I figured that we still had our sleeping bags in there, but the driver had apparently done a pretty good job of hiding it, and when I got too far out and sick of batting away monsters, I turned back. I was going to give up and sleep flat on the floor, when I realized that I still had another option: Shinra Manor. I figured that, sure, it was eery and creaky and had monsters in the basement, but it was also a free mansion with a perfectly safe upper level. If I was going to take on the challenge of sleeping somewhere like that place, it was going to take a touch of redecorating. So I made a quick stop back to the inn, procured my still packed supplies, and started an adventure out into the outskirts of town.

As I reached the top of the stairs out of the main part of town, the first thing that I noticed was the lights creeping out of small windows at the very bottom of the manor. Sephiroth was still down there, and I didn't think the lights had gone off even once since he'd arrived. I wondered if he was sleeping, or if he even _did_ sleep. As I approached the place and pushed open the door, I expected to be met with nothing but darkness. However, the place managed to keep the same dim lighting, even when it was dark outside. That definitely didn't help with the creepy factor, but I took a deep breathe and smiled at the place, as if to challenge it's spookiness. It was time to explore. I took a brief walk around the lower level of the place, but the doors all seemed to be locked. Peering through the keyholes, I saw nothing but a bunch of books and some cans of something or other, so there wasn't any reason to try and get in.

Finally, I decided to try the second floor. The stairs seemed to complain at me as I climbed them, but I took solace in the fact that they all seemed to be in tact and showing no signs of actually breaking. When I reached the top, I took a glance back and forth. I knew that if I went to the right, I'd be closer to where Sephiroth was, and even though I didn't think he'd want to hurt me, I felt it was probably wise to keep some distance. So I went to the left. The first room I checked was mostly full of bookcases, with the exception of a large, steel safe. Tempted as I was to see if the safe was locked, I decided to move on. The next room was a jackpot. There were several beds inside, and the door wasn't locked. When I got in and shut the door behind me, the place didn't look all too bad. It just needed a dusting is all.

"Let's see..." I said to myself, walking to the bed at the end of the room, "What do I have to make this place look nicer?" I threw my bag of supplies down on the bed and opened it up. The first thing I saw made me laugh. It was the uniform I had and never changed into when I was in Coral. I figured that the one I'd been wearing the whole time was probably in need of a change, but it was good at not holding onto grimes or odors, and it _did_ get a break while I was at Gold Saucer. Besides, I didn't think it made sense to change right before sleeping in a dusty old place like that. I pulled the change of uniform out, looking it over, then I turned to a dresser that was against the wall by the bed. Dusting off the knob with my glove, I opened the dresser up and hung my uniform inside on one of the many empty hangers. "Perfect," I said, moving back to the bag.

I didn't have too much when it came to decorating the place, and in the end I had to settle for putting my cell phone on the table, along with a Shinra-supplied health potion, and a few materia that I brought along. When I finished beating the dust out of the comforter and the pillows on the bed, I finally flopped down, feeling tired enough to get some rest. That night proved that it wasn't always a bad thing to take a nap in a dark, empty mansion by yourself. When I woke, I was actually quite refreshed. I sat up on my bed, responding to a buzz and a beep I heard from the table. I reached for my phone. I'd apparently gotten a few emails that I'd missed. I perked up at the first one, which was from a friend of mine in SOLDIER named Kunsel. I hadn't heard from him in a little while, which was saying something because he often sent quite a number of messages my way.

_Subject: A message for you – From: Kunsel_

_ Working hard at your assignment, I assume. I guess it was longer than we thought it would be. I _

_ thought I'd look after Aerith while you were gone, but the Turks were already there guarding _

_ her. I don't know why._

_ Anyway, she says the tire came off her flower wagon, and now the thing's useless. I offered to fix _

_ it for her, but she refused. She's waiting for you to come back and fix it, so hurry up and get _

_ back here already._

I wished I could hurry up and get back there. Our mission was done already, and I didn't mind hanging around for Cloud to see his family, but Sephiroth's behavior was unsettling to say the least. I just wanted to get out of there and know that he wasn't going to desert. It was nice to know that Tseng was really watching after Aerith anyway, not that I figured he wouldn't. Some day I had to tell him he was a good friend. With his demeanor, I doubted that he got that often. He'd probably just tell me that my opinion was duly noted. The next message was from Tifa.

_Subject: I can fight, too – From: Tifa_

_ Sephiroth-I don't get him at all._

_ Is everyone in SOLDIER like him? Oh, and are there any blond guys in SOLDIER? Well, it's _

_ just a dream... Any girl would love to have a blond SOLDIER guy protect her when she's in a _

_ pinch. Well, it's no good just waiting for my blond knight in shining armor to show up, so I've _

_ started learning how to fight, myself. My teacher tells me I've got a knack for it._

Blond guys in SOLDIER... it wasn't too much of a stretch to think she might have been asking about Cloud. I hoped he'd find the time to say something to her while we were there. It was funny though, I hadn't actually seen Tifa fight on the mountain. I found myself curious about how good she was. That certainly explained why her stance looked so professional when she was standing up to those Genesis copies. I looked down the list of messages, and my eyes widened on the next one. It was from Cissnei. She was a Turk often assigned to watching me on my Shinra 'vacations' and making sure that I wouldn't start thinking about betraying the company. Despite the awkwardness of her duties, the two of us talked a lot and became friends, which was a rare thing with a Turk.

_Subject: When you come back – From: Cissnei_

_ Are you in Nibelheim about now?_

_ I've got business in another freezing locale myself. By the way, I couldn't help but notice that _

_ you were reading LOVELESS while you were in Costa del Sol. That was Genesis's favorite _

_ work, wasn't it? So have you finished it yet? I bet you got bored of it in the middle and just _

_ tossed it away. But there's a stage production of LOVELESS now playing in Midgar. Let's go _

_ see it when you get back. Who knows? It might just give you the hint you're looking for._

I felt ashamed to admit that I'd barely started the book before putting it down. The whole poem was too confusing, and every word just reminded me of Genesis. It sort of bummed me out. I couldn't help but feel like that email sounded sort of like she was asking me on a date. She didn't know how I felt about Cloud, but she _did_ know about Aerith. Maybe it all really _was_ just to get me to understand Genesis better, but I had already decided that I had to find out straight from the guy's mouth. Even if Genesis thought he was a monster, he still had to have some humanity left in him. If I could get him to just stop spouting poetry and talk to me, maybe I could try and convince him to change. I had one final email.

_Subject: Don't tell anyone – From: Tifa_

_ I almost forgot._

_ Please don't tell anyone in SOLDIER that I asked about the blond guy. Okay?_

I laughed and shut my phone, leaning back in the bed. Thinking back on all those people I knew, I just wanted things to be simple again. I swore that when I got back from that mission, I'd do my best to straighten everything out with everyone. I knew it sounded like a tough chore, but I wanted things to be nice and simple. I wanted to go back to building wagons for Aerith, finding time for Cloud that _wasn't_ during a mission, and maybe even seeing a play for the simple purpose of enjoying it.

I stood up and stretched. I had no idea what time it was, but I could tell even through the dusty windows that it was daytime. As I stepped out of the room and down the hall, I paused near the stairs. I considered whether or not I should check up on Sephiroth. Spending that much time alone in a basement couldn't have been healthy for anyone, even him. Standing there for a moment, I decided to give him another day. Walking down the stairs and toward the door, I kept Sephiroth on my mind. I guessed he must have known what he was doing, but as the sun hit me and I got a final glimpse of the lights in the basement, I sure wished that _I_ knew.


	28. A SOLDIER's Home Part 9

**A Heart For My Nobody says:**

**Hey guys! Thank you all! As of last update, "What Makes A SOLDIER" has received its 100th review! This was my second story ever to have broken even the double-digits in reviews, and now, thanks to all of you, it's broken the triples! I can't express my appreciation enough for all of my viewers who have stuck with me and given me such wonderful reviews, and for all the people that will do so in the future. You guys rock! I hope you all enjoy this next chapter, and thanks again for reading this far! Much love.

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**Cloud**

I hadn't planned on returning to my house again so soon, but when I woke up and saw that Zack was nowhere to be found, that's where I decided to go. I figured that Zack was probably paying Sephiroth another visit. I wondered what was going on with them, but I went to my house to clear my mind. I supposed I really enjoyed being able to go back to a place from my past, a comfortable place. My mom didn't question me too much about my job, or about SOLDIER, because she was proud of me as it was, and that was a comforting feeling. I found myself laying on the bed downstairs, listening to the water run as she cleaned the dishes, and just thinking to myself. After a few minutes, the water faucet turned off, and she turned my direction, drying her hands on a small towel.

"My, how you've grown," she said. Her voice was quiet, but it carried well through the air. Smiling, she placed the towel back on its rack. "I'll bet the girls never leave you alone."

"...Not really." I responded, finding it hard to talk after so much thinking.

"They have no opportunity with you always going on your missions, then," she decided, stepping closer to the bed. "...I'm worried about you."

"Why?" I asked, turning my head to better look at her. She shrugged a little as she formulated her words.

"There are a lot of temptations in the city..." she started, pausing again before saying anything else. "I'd feel a lot better if you just settled down and had a nice girlfriend."

"...I'm all right," I said, sighing a little. I would've been able to take that comment a little better had I actually _been_ a first class, but the idea of 'settling down' after only achieving such a mediocre job didn't sit well in my stomach. Even still, my mom had been talking to me about relationships for a while, so it wasn't a surprise.

"You should have..." she thought aloud, touching her chin, "an older girlfriend, one that'll take care of you." She smiled, seemingly content with her choice. "I think that would be the perfect type for you."

"...I'm not interested," I responded, even though I realized the answer was a bit blunt. I couldn't think about my words too well, because my thoughts were occupied by the fact that she seemed to be describing someone who fit the standards of a female Zack. I figured that I may have just been paranoia, but her next words didn't help.

"...What about Zack?" she asked, taking a seat on the bed. I flinched, but I didn't think she'd noticed. "Does he have a lady?"

"I don't know," I said plainly. She shifted and stood up from the bed.

"Well, don't let yourself become one of those all work types." She walked over to the counter again to clean a few more plates. I leaned up on the bed to watch her as she continued to talk. "You young men need lives too, you know?"

"We _have_ lives," I said defensively, standing up and walking closer to her. "Would you like help with those?"

"I've got them." She smiled back as a thank you. "What about food? Are you eating right?"

"I'm all right," I assured her. "The company takes care of me."

"Is that so?" She turned around with a skeptical look in her eye. "You can't cook, right? I was worried sick about how you were doing..."

"Mom, I'm telling you," I smiled, crossing my arms, "I'm all right. I'm getting by fine." She smiled back and nodded, shutting her eyes.

"Oh, I know." She laughed a little. "But I can't help but to worry. I _am_ your mother after all." She walked past me and started straightening out the bed. "Anyway, that army food can't compare to good old fashioned home cooking. Why don't you and Zack come over again for dinner? Where have you been staying, anyway?"

"In the inn." I gestured in the general direction of the place. "And sure, I'll ask him about it."

"You've been staying at an inn in your own hometown?" She cupped her hands on her hips. "You can stay here tonight."

"I don't need..." I started to say, but she kept talking.

"Why don't you invite Zack, too? There's an extra bed upstairs, and I'll just sleep down here."

"Mom, you don't have to," I said, feeling surprisingly imposing on my own home. She shook her head.

"I know I don't _have_ to," she went on, "but I insist. Who knows how long it will be until I have more visitors after you leave?" It was from those words that I could tell that she really meant it. Also, I knew it would be a losing battle to try and argue her hospitality. It was around midday when I went out in search for Zack again. I found him where I had suspected, just outside of the Shinra Manor. He perked up when he saw me, and ran over.

"Slept in today..." He grinned, scratching at the back of his neck. I didn't know what he was talking about. As far as I knew, he'd been the first one up in the morning.

"Mom wants us to sleep at my house tonight," I said, wanting to get the offer out. "She also invited you to dinner again."

"Nice!" he said, gripping his fist tight in front of him, as he seemed to like to do. "I guess she likes me, huh?" I smiled at him, and he smiled back. Then he walked closer and put his hand on my shoulder. "Listen, man... you have to go say hi to Tifa at some point."

"I know..." I hung my head. "Just let me do it on my own time, okay?"

"Right." He nodded, and took back his hand. "Well, I'm gonna go tell the guys that they have the place to themselves!" He ran off before I could stop him. I didn't exactly want to rub it in the faces of the other infantrymen that I was hanging out a whole lot with Zack. They'd already given me the idea that they thought something was up, especially Dallert.

A short while later, I met with Zack again outside the well, and we proceeded back to my house. That evening, my mom served a pasta and salad. Everything was fresh, as always, and it still all reminded me of when I was a child, but my mind was focused more on Zack. Somehow that felt different than the first night he was over. The three of us seemed to talk more freely amongst each other, but I actually felt more nervous about Zack than my mom. I'd never had someone stay over my house before, not even Tifa when we were young. And finally that time came, when my mom removed the dishes from the table and turned back to me.

"Why don't you show Zack where he'll be sleeping?" she said over the clatter of plates. "I'm going to do a few chores down here." I nodded in response, standing from my seat, and Zack stood as well. He was staring at me, waiting for me to lead, so I turned and started toward the stairs, signaling him to follow.

"Didn't actually notice this place had an upper floor," he said, looking around as we reached the top. The upstairs was small, consisting of only two rooms. One room was occupied by miscellaneous things, and served mostly as a storage room, and the other room had two beds, my mom's bed and my old one. I took Zack into the room with the beds, and pointed to my old bed.

"You can sleep there," I said, and he looked the bed over. "I'll be sleeping on the other one."

"Where's your mom sleeping tonight?" He cocked his head at me, taking a seat on the bed.

"Downstairs. She insisted." I shrugged and chose to keep standing. Zack laughed.

"A sleepover..." He shook his head, smiling. "I'd heard of them, but I've never had one."

"Me neither..." I said, walking over to a framed photo on the nightstand. I picked it up and looked at the faces. It was myself, my mother, and my father. I wasn't a baby in the picture, but I was young enough that my mother was carrying me. I remembered her telling me that picture was the last one we took together before my father died. I was so young that I barely remembered him.

"...Your family?" Zack startled me as he walked up, and I put the frame back down.

"Yeah," I answered, not turning to look at him.

"You look happy," he said and turned away, throwing his arms up behind his head. He took a few steps around the room, and it looked like he was thinking to himself. "Hey, Cloud?"

"Huh?" I turned to look at him, and he was staring out a window. There was a long pause before he spoke again, and I almost decided to respond a second time.

"If it's alright with you..." he started, but paused again. Then he turned around to face me, looking serious. "When we get back, I'd like to recommend you for SOLDIER." I took a deep breath, and felt myself stop. I had to replay his words over in my head, unable to really believe them. Just the other day, Zack was talking about how SOLDIER was something to not get involved with. Even still, it had been something I'd wanted for years.

"Zack..." I said, wanting to say _something_. I didn't really know how to respond to him. Was that really the way I wanted to get into the SOLDIER ranks? Then again, weren't most SOLDIERs recruited based on a higher rank's observation and recommendation?

"I mean... you don't have to decide until we get back," he said, shifting and taking a step forward. "But I think you'd make a great addition to the team."

"I'm gonna get some fresh air," I said finally, and I turned to walk out. He looked disappointed until I looked back at him and smiled. "Come on. I want to show you something."

Zack followed me out of the room, and into the adjacent one. Along with the piles of trinkets and antiques, there was a small ladder leading to a large open window. I climbed up and he followed me, out onto the gentle slope of the roof. The sun was down already, and the night breeze welcomed us as I took a seat. Zack said nothing, but took in the sight contently.

"I used to sit up here a lot," I said, looking off the roof into town. "The quiet and the view helped me think."

"Hmmm." Zack smiled, looking off the side as well.

"I like high places," I continued, pulling my legs in close to me. "One day I'd like to ride in one of Shinra's airships, and _not_ get sick." Zack laughed a little and looked at me.

"I know you can do it." He smiled. Then he tilted his head back to look at the stars, letting the moonlight reflect off his face. "Someday... I'd like to fly up really high into the sky." His smile broadened as he thought about that. "It's the only place I can't reach, and it's so... big. I can't really think of a good way to describe it, you know?" I nodded to myself and made a noise. He seemed to take that as enough of an answer, and continued to watch the stars. "Those mountains might be rough to travel, but they're sure pretty at night," he thought aloud. I leaned back.

"Why'd you change your mind about SOLDIER?" I asked, and he turned his head to me.

"Well..." he said, leaning up a little. "You said something to me that I said to my mentor in the past."

"Angeal...?" I thought aloud, and he nodded.

"Yeah, and it reminded me of when I was excited about my job." He clutched his fist shut. "SOLDIER's about honor, and living your dreams. It's always been a dream of yours, right?"

"Hmmm." I smiled, looking at the stars myself. "Yeah."

"And with Commander Lazard... killed in action, I just need to pass it by Tseng and... Sephiroth." He paused in his speech, apparently shrugging off some discomfort. "After this whole Genesis thing, we really need more guys like you."

"Zack..." I shifted and turned to him. "Thank you." My tone was even more serious than I meant it to be.

"Ah... hah." He scratched at the back of his neck, grinning off his embarrassment. I wished it were a little lighter, so that I might have actually seen a first class blush. I felt myself tense as I went on.

"And thank you for bringing me to Gold Saucer with you, and for coming to my house with me..." I felt like I was beginning to ramble, and Zack ceased his embarrassment to watch me talk. I paused for a long moment, letting my head hang a little. The cool night air felt just a little too cool that moment. Everything felt a little _too_ present. Nothing felt like the right moment, but I knew I needed to start thinking on my own. I knew that I could finally expect a future where I wouldn't be waiting for my orders, or for someone else to make their move. So I made my own move, and I leaned forward, closing the distance between me and Zack. I lifted my hand and drew his face in closer to mine, until I felt our lips touch together, slowly. His lips were already parted, and I kissed them gently, getting used to the feeling, all the feelings. I pulled away just a fraction of an inch, breathing a final time, and then pressed again into him. I felt him sigh into the kiss, but it was a good sigh. Then, his hand was against the back of my head, just behind my ear. He leaned into the kiss, and I heard his glove crinkle as his fingers closed around my hair. His lips were warm, and the kiss turned into several, as we took breaks for hitched breaths.

His hand slid out of my hair and down the back of my neck, resting on my shoulder. I felt his other grasp the hand I was using to hold myself up, and he leaned against it. As our lips parted again, I heard the sound of our heavy breath, and we touched our heads together. My eyes eased open, and I hadn't really realized that they were closed. I scanned Zack's face, watching his mouth move with each breath, and how his eyes seemed to flicker under his still closed lids, and I smiled.

Nothing could destroy that moment. It didn't matter what had happened yesterday, or what would happen tomorrow, or in a week. That moment, with Zack there under the stars... it was untouchable. He opened his eyes to look into mine, and I watched as the mako swirled in his stare. There was something so perfect about him. I didn't really know what it was, but when I was with him, I felt safe. I felt like the world was safe, and like everything was okay. Like I could do anything. It felt hard to repay that feeling, but as I watched his mouth curl into a smile, I saw a reflection of exactly what I was thinking. That night, my life had more hope than it ever had, and more meaning. We sat there in silence for a long time, and even as we got up to go to bed, it was all that was on my mind. I went to sleep with a new confidence, ready for the events of the next day. Once again, Zack had helped me figure out exactly what I needed to do.


	29. A SOLDIER's Home Part 10

**Zack**

I woke up in the morning before Cloud did, with my arm hanging off the bed and touching the floor. If I'd thought the sleep I got in the Shinra Manor was good, then the sleep I got that last night was amazing. I raised my hand up to touch my lips. I swore I could still feel a tingle left behind from when Cloud kissed me, and it brought a smile to my face. It sort of felt like a dream, that night. We didn't really talk much afterward, and I fell asleep pretty fast. I almost felt like waking Cloud just to make sure he experienced it too. I stretched and launched myself up on the bed, dropping my feet off the side. As usual, I'd slept that night in full uniform, and I never even took the time to remove my boots. In hindsight, I figured that would've been a polite thing to do in somebody else's house. I watched Cloud lay there for a moment before getting up. He was still in a pretty deep sleep it seemed, and I heard small noises coming from downstairs, so I decided to venture down by myself. When I reached the bottom, Cloud's mother was in the process of baking something, and it smelled pretty good. She turned her head to look back at me.

"Oh, good morning!" she said, facing me. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, great!" I nodded vigorously and smiled. "Cloud's still asleep, so I figured I'd take a walk."

"Go right ahead." She placed something in the oven. "But you should stop by for some pie at some point."

"Yes ma'am, Ms. Strife!" I said, preforming a joking salute. She laughed, and I counted that as a victory.

"I'd correct you..." she started, rinsing her hands under the sink, "but it's none too often that I get a military man calling me that." She turned around and crossed her arms, still smiling from the laugh. "Dismissed."

"Ma'am," I said again, turning for the door. I spun around and gave her a wave before actually leaving.

Cloud had put me in a very fine mood, so I figured that nothing could bring me down too much. Even going to talk to Sephiroth, who was on his third day of hiding out in a basement, out of the five days we'd been there. Walking to the manor was a breeze in that state of mind, even when I had to fight off an angry monster who strayed a little too far into town. It was funny how much of a difference a mood could make. Even the dusty old mansion itself felt like it'd be cozy after a little sprucing up, and the stairs didn't sound so eery as I climbed them. Honesty, it _did_ put a tiny damper on my mood as I got closer to Sephiroth and deeper down in the tunnels, and as I narrowly avoided being skewered by a humanoid, turtle-like monster, but I still kept my chin up as I entered the study and closed the door behind me. There he was, still pacing with a book in his hand, only now there were many books scattered along the floor, their pages having been studied already, probably several times.

"Sephiroth..." I said, stepping around a book, and he slowly looked up. "This isn't healthy, man..."

"Since when have you cared?" he said, tossing his book away and turning back to the shelf. I walked closer and leaned against the wall. "None of you have ever cared."

"None of us?" I repeated, cocking my head. "What are you talking about?"

"Long ago, catastrophe struck this planet," he said, looking over the remaining books, then turning to face me. "Your ancestors survived by scurrying about and hiding in fear." What did he mean by _my_ ancestors? I pushed myself up off the wall, crossing my arms as he continued to talk. "The planet escaped certain doom through the sacrifice of the Cetra. After which, your kind would multiply and assume control over the planet as if nothing had happened." He walked to another bookcase to look over the ones there. "Now, the Cetra are but a memory that exists only within the pages of history." I had no clue what he was talking about. What was the Cetra? I was tired of only asking myself.

"So what does this have to do with you?" I asked, and he no longer looked to me while he talked.

"Don't you see?" He tilted his head back. "There is Jenova, an Ancient unearthed from a two-thousand-year-old stratum. And then, there is the Jenova Project." He stopped to think again, as if flipping pages in his mind as easily as the books. "The aim of the project was to create a human being with the powers of a Cetra." He finally looked back at me, narrowing his eyes. "Thus, they created me."

"Created...?" I said in shock, taking a step back.

"Yes." He hung his head, but his face didn't look sad. His expression looked blank. "Professor Gast, leader of the Jenova Project and genius scientist, created me."

"How... how did he...?" I searched for words, and Sephiroth walked up next to me, tilting his head back again.

"Out of my way," he said, and I moved to let him take another book.

"Sephiroth, we're all waiting on you!" I said, hoping to grab his attention again. " We should go back to Shinra. Maybe the scientists there will have some answers for you."

"Hmph..." He shook his head, and his look turned to anger. "I don't need lies and excuses from traitors..."

"T-traitors?" I repeated, watching him flip through more pages. Then, his book slammed shut and I jumped.

"Get out." His words were cold and set in stone. As much as I didn't like the idea of leaving him down there, I wouldn't have dared to argue my point any further.

The walk out of the mansion felt a lot longer than the walk in. I was worried, but found myself more in deep thought than a change of mood. As I walked back into town, I was approached by an old man with a gray beard. His muscles were surprisingly toned for his age, but what really caught my attention was the dark red cape he was wearing.

"Sephiroth is still down there, huh?" he asked, and I stopped to look at him.

"You know?" I questioned him and he nodded, making a small, gruff noise.

"Yes," he confirmed. "I'm the one who told Tifa that he was in there."

"Tifa..." I said, working something out in my head. "Wait... are you her master?"

"Master Zangan, in fact," He said, stepping forward and putting a rough hand on my shoulder. "Listen, boy. I don't want you taking off if there's anything that'll harm the town."

"I don't think Sephiroth would..." I said, sighing and hanging my arms as I considered the idea.

"Oh, no?" he questioned, removing his hand from my shoulder. "You sure do have faith, but I saw what Genesis is capable of."

"Genesis? You know about him, too?" I frowned and crossed my arms. "Anyway, I have no intention of leaving here before Sephiroth does."

"Good to know." He shut his eyes, walking past me. "Then I'll be around if you need any help."

I headed back toward town, picking out Cloud's house as I walked. I was really in need of seeing him again. I came to the door and knocked, and as it opened, the smell of apple pie greeted me.

"Oh, Zack. Come in!" Cloud's mother stepped out of the way, inviting me through the door. "Cloud still isn't up yet. Would you mind waking him for me?"

"No problem." I nodded, and she started fiddling with a few plates in the kitchen.

"Great!" she said, turning around with two plates of pie in hand. "Would you give him one of these?" I took the plates and headed upstairs. Cloud was still laying on the bed, much more gracefully than I ever did. His eyes opened as I walked over, so I grinned and displayed the pie.

"Don't know whether to say 'breakfast in bed' or 'pie for breakfast'!" I laughed, and he sat up a little. "Is this regular?"

"...Only on special occasions," He answered groggily after a yawn. "How long have you been up?"

"A little bit." I shrugged after he took his plate, and I took a bite of my pie. "I went to see Sephiroth. He's still intent on staying down there..."

"What happened with him, anyway?" Cloud asked after a moment, and then he took his first bite. I shrugged, deciding exactly how much I wanted to get into. If it was anyone else asking, I'd probably have avoided the subject altogether, but I thought that Cloud deserved to know at least a little.

"Genesis got to him," I said finally, then looking to Cloud to reassure him. "Sephiroth turned him down, but... he's got to sort some stuff out." Cloud looked reasonably satisfied with the answer. He smiled up at me and dropped his feet off the bed. I noticed that he was shoeless.

"I want you to recommend me," he said, putting his plate down on the nightstand. "I want to get into SOLDIER, and I'm not gonna let anyone like Genesis get to me."

"I know you're not," I said, happy to hear him say the words. "I'm looking forward to introducing you to the others." He let his eyes drift downward. I figured he was still a little nervous about the whole thing, but his willingness to proceed anyway was one of the things that made him so promising. He continued to impress me. Then he stood up, arching his back in a stretch.

"I'm going out for a little bit," he said, turning and walking toward the stairs. I followed him a few steps, cocking my head.

"Where are you going?" I asked, and he stopped. His smile was the first thing I noticed as he turned his head back to me.

"I'm going..." he started, hesitating only for a moment. "I'm going to see Tifa."


	30. A SOLDIER's Home Part 11

**A Heart For My Nobody says:**

**Hello, my beloved readers! This is the last chapter I'm posting before Christmas, so merry Christmas to all who celebrate it! To everyone else, happy holidays, new years, or just plain good days to you! Thanks so much for joining me all the way up to chapter 30. You guys and your wonderful reviews are my Christmas presents this year!

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**Cloud**

The time had come. Even if he didn't realize it, Zack had finally convinced me that I needed to stop by and face Tifa. It had been too long then. At first, I'd been able to justify not talking to her by deciding that I was only there for a mission, and that I'd be too busy, or that _she'd_ be too busy, or that I'd come visit again soon enough. None of those things were the real issue. The truth was, I felt unaccomplished, and embarrassed to have returned without fulfilling my promise to get into SOLDIER. I felt like I still didn't deserve her respect, or rather her father's respect, and that the whole thing would be a let down. Then, Zack convinced me. He told me that Tifa seemed to miss me, and that it would be a good thing for me to go and see her. I never even questioned him on why he thought those things, but I believed him, and now I'd told him that I would do it. I would go face the issue, I would talk to Tifa, and just like with my mom, I'd probably be glad to have paid the visit. That assurance was all hypothetical, though, and I still couldn't help but worry about what could go wrong.

As I walked out of my house, I kept my pace very slow. Tifa's house was practically next to mine, but I felt like I needed a moment. I kept thinking about what I'd say to her first, and how I'd explain why I didn't come to see her sooner. Tifa was a little sharper than my mom though, or at least more ready to argue something that didn't make sense. I knew she'd catch onto me if I told her I'd been busy, but I was worried that she'd look down on me if I told her that I was afraid, and worst of all, I worried that she may have completely moved on, and that seeing me wouldn't mean anything to her. I psyched myself out so much that I almost decided to call the whole thing off, but I felt like it was almost a promise to Zack at that point, and remembering him made me strong again, if only for a moment. So I knocked on the door, and I held my breath, and with all the worrying I had been doing about this or that happening, I never considered the possibility of one thing. Her dad opened the door.

"...Hello?" he said after staring at me and watching me tense. For a moment, he looked pretty blank, and I almost hoped he wouldn't recognize me, and I could just come up with an excuse and get out of there. But then his face twisted into a new expression, and he _did_ recognize me. "Cloud...?"

"Hi." I forced the word out, feeling thirteen again. He just continued to stare at me for a long moment, moving his head and his jaw a little while he considered me. I swore I could feel my body actually shrinking before him. Finally, he sighed and stepped back into his house. I thought the door would close on me, but instead, he held it open.

"Guess you better come in," he said, and it didn't really feel so inviting. Of course, I figured that I could have been wrong, and any feelings of discomfort could have been coming from my own self-consciousness. So I went in, and more of my childhood came flooding back to me. There was the same rug laid out by the door, the same type of potted plant on the same table, and the same living room that Tifa's father led me into. It was as if nothing had changed, except that her father looked a bit more aged.

"Thank you, sir," I said, feeling very much like I was reporting to a commanding officer. He made a small noise that didn't clearly convey his response, and then moved to go to the kitchen. "I'm here to see Tifa," I pointed out, as though there was any question. He was out of my sight then, and after a moment, I figured he'd chosen to pretend I wasn't there. Finally, he spoke, but it wasn't a response to what I'd said.

"Would you like some coffee, Cloud?" he called from around the corner, and I heard the clinking of glass mugs.

"No thank you, sir," I responded, having never actually _tried_ coffee. I couldn't seem to help tagging 'sir' onto the end of my words. I supposed it had become a security for me. Another long silence gave me the time to grow nervous, and I tried to distract myself by examining the house. Then I heard footsteps coming from the kitchen, and he came back into my view.

"So how long have you been in town, Cloud?" he said, lifting his own mug of coffee to his lips. It made me uneasy how he was consistently using my name at the end of his sentences, but his intentions seemed good enough.

"A few days now," I responded, and he pulled the mug away from his lips, using it to gesture at a chair.

"Might as well sit," he said, and I sat. I wanted to make the best impression that I could, after all. "A few days, huh?" He leaned against a wall, taking another sip. "So you came in with the other troops. Has Tifa seen you yet?"

"No sir." I shook my head, looking down at my feet. "I've been busy."

"I see," he said simply. I looked up after a moment, and he shrugged his shoulders a bit as he went for another sip of coffee. "So you've made it into SOLDIER, huh?"

"Actually..." I hesitated. I didn't think about what I'd say ahead of time if asked that question. I'd been nervous enough to talk about my low rank with friends, but at that time, I felt especially judged.

"I hear the SOLDIER guys have been acting strangely," he continued. "A couple of people around town are a little worried about Sephiroth locking himself up in the Manor."

"Zack Fair is here," I said, trying to defend my possible job to be, "and he's just fine. I think that Sephiroth is fine too." I wasn't actually too sure about that second statement. Zack had appeared to be pretty down after coming out of the mansion.

"Haven't heard of Zack..." he said, frowning, "but I hope you're right about Sephiroth. We don't want anything to happen that will put the town in danger." I thought about the harshness of what he was implying, and I really started to need a friendly face.

"Sir," I started, shifting in my seat a bit. "Is Tifa home?"

"She's not..." He shook his head and pushed himself off the wall. "I wanted to talk to you about that..." He paused again, staring at me before he continued. "I don't want you to see Tifa." I felt my stomach drop at those words.

"But, sir!" I said, standing from my seat. "It's been so long!" He seemed perfectly ready for my reaction, and just stood there. "I know we were reckless as kids, but... I've grown now!"

"Into what, exactly?" he asked after a moment, cocking his head a little. "A sixteen-year-old army man?" He sighed and shut his eyes, placing his mug on the mantle. "Listen, Cloud... I'm not even angry at you anymore. I've moved on." He shrugged a little. "But so has Tifa."

"But I want to hear that from _her_ mouth," I protested, desperate not to be kicked out of Tifa's life again before even seeing her.

"Listen," he said again. "Tifa lost her mom, my wife, and it was brutal on her." He leaned back one more, and I relaxed my muscles a bit. "She thought she could see her mom again if she got to the top of the mountain, and _you_ influenced her to try." What he was saying wasn't actually the truth, but the lie had been implanted in him for too many years. I followed Tifa up the mountain in secret, because I'd been worried about her. I never thought it was a good idea. "Now, because of that, she's dedicated herself to guiding people up that mountain all the time! And to make matters worse, the reactor seems to be making the monsters up there more dangerous."

"I never meant for her to start climbing the mountain..." I said, almost starting to believe that it was my fault, "but I don't think I could have stopped her either..."

"But now you come back here, working for the very company that's responsible for the dangers in her job." He shook his head again, and sighed another time. "You've already done enough damage to her as it is. Let her move on." I stood there in silence, and I let my arms hang by my sides. I should never have gone to her house. It was all just a bad idea. He stepped up closer to me, crossing his arms. "I'm sure you're a great guy, Cloud. You were a great kid, too, but I don't want you near Tifa." He put a hand on my shoulder. "The two of your lives just don't mix well." I stepped back, letting his hand drop down. I didn't want his hand on my shoulder. Not in the same place that Zack puts his. It held no comfort for me.

"Fine..." I said, practically holding my breath, and I turned to walk out of the house.

"I'm sorry, Cloud..." I heard him say, but I just kept walking. I felt like such an idiot. I knew very well that I'd mess something up if I came back to Nibelheim too early, but I let my guard down. I let it down for Zack, which I didn't regret at all, but I really should have known my limits. I shouldn't have gone to knock on Tifa's door, or to stay without asking for her first. I felt like such an idiot.

As I walked, I saw Zack approaching me from the well. He had a big smile on his face, like he hadn't a care in the world. I was glad, I supposed, that he'd missed all that. I was glad that he was none the wiser, and he was still living off of the smiles and pie from that morning. I needed Zack to be happy.

"How'd it go?" he asked, and I forced a smile myself. "Did you get to talk to Tifa?" That smile was very difficult to maintain, as I felt my stomach churn again. I needed Zack to be happy.

"Yeah..." I said, sacrificing my happiness for his. "Yeah, I did..."


	31. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 1

**Zack**

Five days had passed during our mission in Nibelheim. In a way, I was glad we'd spent the time there that we did. If we hadn't been there that long, Cloud never would have gotten up the courage to go see his mom, and I would've never been able to meet her. Also, it was only on the fifth day that Cloud managed to get himself to visit Tifa. The whole experience was sort of nice at first, but the entire time I had something nagging at the back of my mind. Before we ever even took the truck out of Midgar, Sephiroth warned me that he might betray Shinra. I was worried to hear him say that, but relieved that he seemed loyal enough to at least tell me. When Genesis ended up showing his face at the reactor, my worries grew stronger, but Sephiroth turned him away, and I felt like I could breathe easy again. But then, he locked himself up in a dark mansion, studying books about some strange project that Shinra worked on many years ago. On day five of the mission we'd originally planned on only taking a day, Sephiroth had locked himself away for _three_ days. He didn't even come out of that basement once.

When day six rolled around, I was feeling increasingly uneasy by the hour. I tried to go back down into the depths of the Shinra Manor, but Sephiroth had locked the door, and he wouldn't answer me. The people of the town were beginning to grow nervous as well. Even at night, a faint glow could be seen at the very bottom of the building. The lights in the basement never went off...

And on the seventh day...

I woke, coughing in my bed, and fell with a thud onto the floor. I felt really disoriented, and everything felt warm, and I just couldn't stop coughing. That's when I heard the screams. They were coming from outside. Terrible screams. Painful screams. I jumped up to my feet, grabbing my sword from the table, and looked on in horror as the wall behind the table collapsed in flames. The inn was on fire? Making sure there was nobody else in the room, I sprinted downstairs, dodging some debris on the staircase. I took a look around, but the owners didn't seem to be inside either, so I threw my weight against the door of the building and stumbled out into the town.

My breath halted at the sight before me. It wasn't just the inn that was in flames, but the entire town. The first thing that I saw was the well that Cloud had talked about, burning and crumbling before me. What was happening? It all felt like a nightmare. Then, next to the well, I saw Cloud himself, laying motionless. I ran over to him and fell to my knees, sighing with relief when I felt a pulse.

"Cloud!" I yelled, pulling him further away from the flames of the well. "What happened here?" He moved only slightly, not even opening his eyes, and grunted.

"Sephiroth..." he said, and I grew cold. Slowly, I turned around to look at the stairs in the direction of the mansion, and there he was. Sephiroth was right there, practically standing in the flames, and staring directly at me.

"I'm coming to get you..." he said, but somehow it didn't seem to be directed at me. His voice sounded different. In some way, it was changed. He stared at me for a long moment, flames burning in the reflection of his eyes, and then he turned towards the mountain, walking through the fire as he went.

I yelled, and I ran at him, because that was the first instinct that I had, but then I stopped. I turned back around to look at the village in flames, and to look at Cloud. My eyes found Cloud's house, already in rubble, and I wanted to explode.

"How could you...?" I clenched my fists shut by my sides, and I felt every muscle in my body grow tense. "Sephiroth, how could you...?" I turned away again, taking a deep breath, trying to swallow my anger. I felt wrong leaving Cloud there, but he was a safe distance from the flames, and I knew that I couldn't take him where I was going. Sephiroth needed to be stopped. He was _going_ to be stopped. I wasn't going to let anyone else suffer. So I followed him. I went up the mountain after him, and all the way to the reactor. It would end there.

The reactor door sparked as I threw it open, sword ready in my hand. When I ran in, I saw the body of a young lady laying by the stairs. Then, I realized that body was Tifa. I ran to her side, noticing that she still had her eyes open.

"Sephiroth did this," I said, clenching my fist again, "didn't he?" She turned her head to look at me. For a long moment, she just stared, and I could see that her face was drenched with tears. I offered my hand. I reached out to touch her shoulder, but she pulled away and curled in on herself. I just watched her, and I shook my head. How could Sephiroth have done this? He really _was_ a monster. When I got up and ran to the stairs, I heard a small noise come from Tifa.

"I hate you!" she said, sobbing again. "I hate Shinra, I hate SOLDIER! I hate you all!" I felt my heart drop, but I couldn't blame her. I thought... at that moment, I hated SOLDIER too. I continued up the stairs, letting my rage build with every running step. I pulled back my sword, and then I swung it as hard as I could, cutting down the door marked 'JENOVA'. I ended up on my knee on the other side, listening to the sound of the metal crashing down behind me until all was silent.

"Mother," Sephiroth's voice came from just ahead of me, and I followed it down a short hall into the next room. "let's take back the planet together," he continued. He was standing on the top of a small ramp, facing a strange metallic figure of a woman, hooked into the wall by many wires. "I... I had an epiphany." He extended his arms to the sides, standing close to the figurine. "Let's go to the promised land... Mother..."

"Sephiroth!" I yelled up at him. What the heck was he talking about, anyway? What was the promised land, and why was he calling this thing 'mother'? "Why did you kill the townspeople? Why did you hurt Tifa?" I asked frantically, my mind bursting with questions and anger. "Answer me, Sephiroth!" He started to laugh.

"Mother, they're here again," he went on, voice full of contempt. "You should have ruled this planet. You were stronger, smarter." He turned his head slightly back in my direction. "But then they came... Those inferior dullards..." I felt myself tense again as he talked. "They came and took this planet away from you. But don't be sad, Mother." He started to move closer to the figure, reaching his arms up to grasp it. "I am with you now..."

Sephiroth grabbed the sides of the metal woman, and pulled the thing out of its place, the wires snapping as electricity flew around. Then, he tossed it to the side, and turned to look at what he revealed from behind it. There was a test tube, and inside it was the body of what looked like a woman, apparently floating in Mako.

"We meet at last," he smiled and stared into the glass. "Mother..." I walked up behind Sephiroth and held my Buster Sword out next to him, turning the blade to his neck. Slowly, he looked over his shoulder at me.

"Sephiroth!" I yelled again, intent on getting his attention. "Have you completely lost your mind?" The silence after that lasted for too long, and I felt like my nerves would snap. He just stood there, and turned his head away. Then, all of a sudden, he spun around, swinging the Masamune at me. I managed to move my sword just fast enough to block his, but the attack pushed me back a few feet. "Sephiroth..." I was completely unfamiliar with the coldness I saw in his eyes then. "I trusted you!" I jumped at him, ready with another attack, but he deflected me down to the ground below. As soon as my feet touched the ground, I was forced to dive out of the way of another attack. The Masamune left a deep gash in the metal me as it missed me.

"Hmph..." Sephiroth glared down at me. "Traitor..." Then he rushed at me again, and I managed to block the attack, being thrown once more. Sephiroth's movements were too fast, and I could do nothing but block. He pursued me after I was thrown by each strike, knocking me higher and higher up into the room. I could see his eyes as he attacked, focused and locked on me. The swings of his sword were cutting gashes in the walls and destroying wires, and electricity was shooting everywhere. I felt myself get a few shocks as I flew. With another strong swing and a laugh, Sephiroth threw me against a wall, and the impact caused me to lose my defensive position for just long enough. The next thing I knew, pain was searing threw my body and I was falling face first down to the metal floor below. I could do nothing to catch myself, and I landed hard, knocking the wind out of my chest. I coughed and looked up to see the blood by my arm. My entire body hurt, so I couldn't quite tell where I'd been hit. Slowly, I pushed myself up onto a knee and watched Sephiroth lower himself down onto the ground, as if he were floating.

"No, you're not..." I said, forcing myself to my feet. "You're not the Sephiroth I once knew!"

"I am the chosen one." he said after a moment, lifting his arms and raising his chin. "I have been chosen to rule this planet." He lowered his eyes back down to mine, and he was smiling. How could he be smiling after what he did? Something was definitely happening to him... something terrible. He pointed his sword at me and dashed forward. I managed to jump backward to avoid the attack, but when I landed, he was immediately right in front of me again, and I had no time to react. I held my sword with all my might, pushing back against him, but Sephiroth was too strong. I was thrown back again, harder this time, and the Buster Sword flew from my hand, stabbing down into the ground.

I felt that Sephiroth's attack had managed to hit my body again, and I was limp in mid air. I heard the sound of my sword as it hit the metal, echoing in my head. I was thrown right out of the room, threw the door I had broken, and back into the main part of the reactor. My back hit the ground once, and the impact threw me up again. I came down a second time on the stairs, face first, and slid down until the steps slowed my momentum to a stop. Everything in my body felt broken, and I couldn't get myself to move. Finally, I managed to raise my head just enough to see Sephiroth looking down from the top of the stairs. He was smiling still, and his eyes narrowed on me. I thought it then. That was the end.

And my vision went black...


	32. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 2

**Cloud**

Everything. Everything was on fire. I found myself laying there, just laying, for what felt like hours after Zack had left me. I knew though, that it had only been a couple of minutes. I knew because I watched it burn. The well crumbled and fell before me, the inn was on fire, Tifa's house was on fire, and I couldn't even see my own home past the smoke. It didn't matter. I watched him do it. I watched him kill everyone until the screams stopped. Why would Sephiroth have done that? _How_ could he have done that? No, I knew it didn't make any difference. There was no excuse. Nothing could make me forgive Sephiroth for what he did to Nibelheim, and my home, my mom, and Tifa. Everything was gone. That was my whole life. My whole life other than Zack. For a moment, I forgot where he went, but then I remembered when he saw Sephiroth. I remembered when he ran after him. He followed him up the mountain. I knew then, I knew I couldn't let him do that on his own. I didn't want to. I had nothing left. If not for Zack, I had nothing.

My eyes slowly traced over the ground. There were so many bodies around. Most of them, I couldn't recognize with all the smoke, but then I saw something that made my heart drop in my chest. I hoped then, that I wasn't really seeing what I thought I was. I turned, and reached, and started to drag myself along the ground, closer. Even among the flames, I felt my body grow cold as my fear was confirmed and my hope was destroyed. I reached a final time, grabbing the blue cloth of the uniform and pulling myself closer.

"Dallert..." I tried to say, but the words barely came out. He was soaked in blood, and he was motionless. I felt my chest tighten, and I choked for a breath. How could this be happening? I tried for another sound to come from my mouth, and dropped my head down on his leg. Then, I heard a sound that wasn't mine.

"Cloud...?" Dallert's voice said, but it sounded husky and weak. I turned my head up quickly, and saw that his eyes were open just a little.

"Dallert...!" I managed to actually speak. "We have to get you... out of here. You need help..."

"From who...?" he said after a moment. "Shinra's hours from here..." He sighed, and then tried to smile at me. "I think I'm done, man... you..."

"Don't!" I interrupted him. "You never liked it when people gave up...!"

"Cloud," he said again, this time trying to keep his usual strong voice. "Listen to me, 'cause I don't think I'm gonna be able to stay with you here..." I pulled on his leg a little, some part of me still trying to get him to move. "It was real fun... a real experience."

"Come on..." I tried one last time, and he smiled again.

"Cloud..." He reached up and gripped the arm that was pulling his leg, his face turning serious. "Zack... had better... take care of you." Then I heard his last breath, long and then silent. I couldn't move at first. I was stuck there, waiting for his eyes to open again, or for him to say something else, but he didn't, and this time he was truly motionless.

I didn't even remember standing up. I felt like it must have been difficult to get myself to my feet, but I didn't remember. I was driven now, just to find my way up that mountain. All I wanted to do was to scream, or cry, but all I could do was walk. There was something eerie and different about that whole walk. I didn't find a single monster as I pushed myself up Mt. Nibel, and everything was very silent. It was sort of like I was in a dream, or a nightmare. My mind just kept playing over what I saw happen in my hometown. I kept hoping that I may have missed someone, that _he_ may have missed someone. I thought, I was alive, so maybe someone else made it. But I watched him kill so many people, _too_ many people, and I didn't think that anyone could have escaped. I was startled out of my thoughts when the crunching of rocks beneath my feet became the creaking of a bridge. It was the second one I crossed, I thought, and I could see the reactor in the distance. It still felt so far, but I couldn't have stopped walking if I wanted to.

Finally, as I stared down at my slowly moving feet, I saw the shadow of the reactor creep into view. My gaze turned upward, and there it was. I'd made it. I stood there for a moment, eyes fixed to the stairs and the door. Then, something else caught my attention. Tifa's father was laying on the gravel, just near the reactor. He was covered in blood, and as I approached him, I could already tell that he was gone. I couldn't even figure out what I was feeling. There was so much fear, and so much anger, and my ribs hurt under my right arm. I didn't even remember why they hurt. I tried to swallow, but even that was hard, and my feet started to move again, taking me up the staircase. The door to the reactor was broken, so I just stepped in past it.

What I was feeling, and seeing... it didn't even feel real anymore. I saw Tifa laying on the floor of the metal room. I stared just long enough to see that there wasn't much blood, and that she was breathing normally. Something stopped me from going to her. I just had to keep moving. As I made my way up the staircase, I froze, because Zack was there, also unconscious on the steps. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't get myself to touch him either, to assure myself that he was still warm. I saw that he was breathing, and so I still had strength, and I continued to walk. I didn't even know if I was breathing anymore myself. Nothing about any of that was right. It compared to nothing I'd ever seen, nothing I'd ever heard of. I passed slowly through the final door, and even the metal there was torn. Then, I felt like my heart had stopped. There he was.

Sephiroth was standing before me, staring deeply at a large glass tube, surrounded by metal and dim blue lights. He looked different, even from the back. Everything about him, even just his subtle movements and glances at the tube, all seemed to show it; he'd truly lost his mind. My eyes focused, breaking from Sephiroth long enough to find Zack's Buster Sword, stabbed down into the ground in front of me. The sword was right there, and Sephiroth's back was facing me. I knew it was crazy. I knew that with every fiber of my body, but I couldn't stop then. I couldn't live if I didn't do it. I reached up slowly, swallowing my fear, and gently wrapped my hand around the hilt. Tightening my grip, I pulled the blade from the ground as quietly as I could, and took a step forward. Sephiroth didn't look back. I couldn't hesitate any long, so I grabbed the sword in both hands, running with it as though it were as familiar to me as it was to Zack. As Sephiroth stretched his arm up to touch the glass, I stabbed the Buster forward with all my might, and I heard a crack.

Sephiroth twitched, and his muscles tightened up to the hand that reached for the now cracked tube. The sword had made it's way entirely through his back and out his chest, and he couldn't move. I clenched my teeth and held the sword tight as he slowly looked back over his shoulder. I knew I was the last person he expected to see. I pushed the sword even further, angrier by the second, and then tore it out from his back, dropping him to his knee. He choked, and put a hand on the tube. The glass made a squealing noise as he dragged himself down, until he was laying still on the floor. I felt myself breathe after a moment, not in relief, but in closure, and I turned away, walking back to the exit of the room.

I found Zack again on the stairs, and I leaned down next to him, placing my hand on his back. He made a noise, but he still didn't wake up. I wanted to move him, but I knew I didn't currently have the strength to do so, so I walked down the stairs to Tifa instead. She was unconscious, and as I leaned by her side, I thought about how she hadn't seen me yet. I hadn't seen her yet either, at least not that close. She looked so different than she did when we were kids, but so similar at the same time. I leaned her up and touched my glove to her face, hoping that she might wake to see me. Then I heard a noise from above, and I jumped a little. Looking up, I was hoping that I'd see Zack, but he was still on the stairs. The sound was coming from the door at the top, and just after a moment, Sephiroth emerged with a woman's head in his hands. I thought I had seen that woman in the tube when I attacked him. How did he survive that? He noticed me and froze, anger forming on his face.

"How dare you...!" he said, standing tall. I glared back, unable to allow myself any more fear.

"Cloud..." I heard Zack's voice from the stairs, and that drew my attention even away from Sephiroth. "Finish Sephiroth off..." I never thought I'd hear him say that. I never expected that I'd actually ever attempt something that crazy, but Sephiroth was weak then, and I was the only who could do anything. I nodded at Zack, set Tifa down, and then I grabbed the Buster Sword and ran at Sephiroth with all my strength.

"Sephiroth!" I yelled his name loud and long, feeling anger in every second I held my breath. Running up the stairs, I kicked myself off the metal and jumped high into the air, ready to land the killing blow. Sephiroth, however, had somehow managed to regain his strength, and he blocked the attack with his sword, using only his left arm. From the block, he put pressure against the sword and threw me back into the room I'd found him in originally. Yelling, I lost control and let the Buster fall from my hand, tumbling along the ground with it. An attack from that sword... the masamune... it wasn't like other swords. My entire body seemed to hurt. Seconds later, Sephiroth followed me into the room, limping as he approached. I tried to move, but I couldn't. He loomed above me, slowly raised his sword, and then stabbed it down into me. It went through my chest, and pain seared through my entire body.

Sephiroth glared down at me, watching me squirm, and his muscles tensed. He raised his arm up, and along with his sword, I was pulled into the air until my feet no longer touched the ground.

"Don't... test me!" he yelled, his voice pained but angrier than I'd ever heard it. I couldn't focus on his words though. All I could think about was all the pain. I felt that the sword had gone straight through me, and I was being held in the air by my wound. My chest was pulsing hard, and I knew I was losing a lot of blood. I felt like that was the end for me. Once again, I felt useless.

Then, I let myself think. Feeling as though my life was over, I forgot about the pain just long enough to remember everything. Sephiroth destroyed my hometown. He set fire to Nibelheim and watched everyone burn, he killed the people who escaped the flames. He killed my mother, and Tifa's father. He killed Dallert, he tried to kill Tifa... he tried to kill Zack! Everything... he tried to destroy everything. My childhood hero was the person who destroyed my life in a single night, and now he was trying to destroy me. How could he? How could he betray everyone like that? Every part of me, everything that had happened... it all felt bottled up, and now it was going to release itself. I hated Sephiroth, and he could never get away with that!

Both of my hands gripped hard around the masamune's blade, my fingers pressing into the edge. With a hard breath, I pulled the sword a little further through me and managed to touch my feet to the ground. I continued to move the sword.

"No...!" Sephiroth said, fighting my grip. "Impossible!" With all the strength I had, and strength I never thought I did, I hoisted Sephiroth into the air with his own sword, and threw him against the wall. I felt the masamune rip out of me, and fell to one knee as Sephiroth slammed hard against the metal. I looked up in time to see him fall, limp, down a large hole in the floor and into the darkness below.

If it was going to happen... if I was going to die then, I wanted to see Zack. I wanted to see him one last time, and to let him know that Sephiroth was gone. I forced myself back onto my feet, stumbling and feeling for the wall to support me. I almost had to throw my own body just to be able to move out of the door to that room. I stumbled into the next one, but I couldn't stay on my feet, and I fell on the stairs, feeling myself slide down them, face first and on my stomach, until I slowed to a stop. I couldn't move anymore, but I heard something, so I turned my eyes. Zack was still there, on the stairs, just a little further down from me, and he was looking back.

"Cloud..." he said, trying to reach his hand up for me, "you did it..." And as his arm reached, I felt the tip of his finger brush against my hair. Then... everything went black...


	33. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 3

**Zack**

I had fought a lot of things in my time, both human and monster, but never anything like Sephiroth. Whether he was really a human or not, his skills were far beyond anything I'd seen. After he'd struck me down, I would have thought that even the entirety of SOLDIER couldn't have taken him out, but then someone else came. I barely noticed Cloud when he stepped into the reactor, and I couldn't manage to move a muscle in my body. If I could have, I probably would have told Cloud to run, if I was in my right mind. An infantryman would never stand a chance against Sephiroth, right? There was no doubt in my mind about that. But he did it. I had no idea what actually happened in that room, but Cloud defeated Sephiroth. Without any Mako enhancements or specialized training in Shinra, Cloud defeated the legendary hero of SOLDIER, Sephiroth. Then he came back and collapsed, limp as I was, on the stairs. It didn't matter though, because he'd already impressed me more than anyone else could have. It didn't seem to matter to me that he had passed out, or that I couldn't move. I figured we had to be okay then, because it was over. Danger was no longer on my mind. Little did I know that Shinra wanted to clean the SOLDIER slate once and for all.

It seemed like days that we laid there on the stairs. It could have been hours, or weeks. I had no clue. I just kept drifting off into darkness, and waking up later to find that nothing had changed. After however long it had been, Shinra finally arrived at the reactor. At that point, I was only semi-conscious, so I couldn't talk. I could see though, and what I saw didn't look right. As they lifted me up onto a stretcher, I could see that, along with the people in lab coats, everyone there was a Turk. I supposed I could understand why they would send one or two, what with the SOLDIERs disappearing and such, but for that many of them to be there, something else had to be going on. My head started to hurt as I thought about it, and I heard myself grunt a bit. The people holding the stretcher didn't even bat an eyelash at the fact that I was conscious, and just started carrying me down the stairs. I could hear little sounds around the area like people were mumbling to each other, but I couldn't make out a thing that they said. That was probably because my head was throbbing. On top of my injuries, I was most likely dehydrated, and I could barely even keep my eyes open. I was carried down and off the stairs, and then, as the people who were holding me stopped walking, I heard a voice that was unpleasantly familiar to me.

"This one..." the voice said, and I heard footsteps growing closer. "Take him down to the basement in the Shinra Manor." It clicked in my head just before the speaker came into focus above me. The voice belonged to the head of the science department in Shinra, Professor Hojo. He was always a cold man to be around, placing his own experiments in a higher priority than human lives, and I could have sworn that he'd been rooting for the monsters that he pitted me against in the past. There was absolutely nothing comforting about the fact that he was there, and I could only worry about the order he just gave.

"Yes, sir," the men who were holding me said as they started to walk. I realized then that they were not doctors, but scientists.

"Sephiroth..." Hojo said, smiling for some unknown reason, "you've surely done it this time." The people carrying me stopped once again as another man looked me over upon entering the room. My eyes only focused in time to see the back of his head as he moved on passed me. Was that... Tseng? He stopped in the middle of the room, and Hojo barely offered him a glance. "Oh, it's you," Hojo said, scoffing a little. "Is Mr. Veld doing well?"

"Yes," the man said, plainly, and it was definitely Tseng. He never really had too much tone to his voice, but having known him for so long, I could tell that he didn't sound too happy. That just made me worry more.

"I see. How's the disposal of the village going?" My body jerked at Hojo's words. Disposal of the village sounded like Shinra was trying to cover the whole thing up. That would explain why the Turks were there, but how could they pretend that an entire village never existed?

"We have already began the operation," Tseng answered, hesitating for just a moment. "But, is there really a need to go that far?"

"Hah! You're still young." Hojo shook his head. "Your opinions don't matter here at all. Hurry up with the disposal." As Tseng nodded, Hojo turned his focus to another part of the room and started to walk there. "Hmm... Wait just a second..." I saw him lean over another stretcher, adjusting his glasses. I could see Cloud's blond hair and his hand. "This one here... intriguing, most intriguing!" I felt myself drifting unconscious again, but before I did, I heard him say one last terrifying thing; "He'll make a fine test subject!"

When I woke next, I was on a cold table in the lab in Shinra Manor. I still couldn't move, but I figured that was because I was strapped down. What woke me were the voices of two men debating. One of them was Professor Hojo, and the other one I didn't recognize. When my eyes found him, I could see that it was another scientist with his back to me.

"That's a lot of Mako," the scientist said, hesitantly. "Isn't that outside regulations?"

"Do you think I brought you into this to follow regulations?" I heard Hojo say. "You will give him the amount I tell you to."

"The infantryman hasn't had any Mako treatments before..." the other man said, fidgeting between words. "Perhaps we should start him on a third of the treatment and..."

"This _infantryman_ was the one who finished Sephiroth off. He has the potential to handle at least the same dosage as the SOLDIER." Hojo stepped into my view, gesturing with his arms. "Now stop questioning me or I'll get rid of you and find some more competent help!" He left the room, slamming the door, and the scientist hung his head a little. After a moment, he started pushing a machine across the room and stopped it near me, fiddling with something.

Several minutes later, having not even realized that I had closed my eyes, I blinked my vision back into focus as the man started dabbing my arm with a wet cloth. The dabbing was soon followed by the prick of a large needle into the vain on my forearm. I twitched, but had to force myself to get used to the needle as I realized that he was leaving it in. He moved a few steps away from me to another table to do the same to what I assumed was Cloud's arm. I wasn't at the right angle to see the head of the man on the other table, but Hojo was clearly talking about Cloud moments earlier. Then, he flicked a switch on the machine and started to jot something down on a clipboard. The machine started buzzing, and slowly got a little louder before I felt pressure on my arm where the needle was. Something was being pumped into me. He must have been pumping Mako into me. That meant he must have been pumping Mako into Cloud too. Then, whatever it was started to burn a bit.

"Er... ah..." I gritted my teeth and squirmed a bit on the table. That was enough to catch the attention of the scientist, who looked up from his clipboard to acknowledge me.

"Oh, so you're awake?" he said, placing down his pencil. "Don't worry. That stuff is just to help prep your body for the tube." I wasn't sure if he was actually trying to comfort me or not, but I tried to jerk harder at the thought of being put in a test tube. "Once you're in there, you won't feel a thing."

I didn't remember going unconscious again after that, but I supposed I did. Next thing I knew, I was floating in Mako, staring out through the glass of my tube. From where I was was, I couldn't see Cloud anywhere. It was hard enough to make out the room before me at first, because everything appeared to be tinted green. I just floated there for a while. From time to time, the scientist would come by and examine me, mess with a few buttons or so, but never remove me from the tube. I had periods of time where I would float there for hours on end, and I thought I'd go out of my mind. Sometimes, I felt really sick when I woke up, and other times I felt really out of it, as though I was in a dream. There were a few times that I was in so much pain that I wanted to scream, but I couldn't. Then, I started to wake up less frequently, and it became hard for me to tell whether or not the scientist who was checking on me was the same person. It felt like I was dieing, slowly, but surely.

Then, I woke up one day when I heard a voice. I couldn't tell what it said, because it sounded muffled or distant. I could barely move my eyes at the time, and I knew I had to have been floating there for at least a week. The voice spoke again. It sounded like the same words, but they were almost as drowned out as before, and I still couldn't make out the meaning. Then I heard my name, and a scoff, and I tried to figure out who was talking to me. I knew the voice. I knew it really well, and it was someone that I liked, not a scientist.

"You call yourself SOLDIER?" it said, and it was so familiar to me. It wasn't Cloud, but who was it? Then, a man came into focus before me as though he had simply appeared there, or my eyes had somehow missed him. The first thing I saw was his great, white wing, and I followed it to his face. He gave me a stern look that was just as familiar as his voice, staring for a good long moment before speaking again. "You tarnish the SOLDIER name!" He started to turn away, and I felt my heart jump in my chest. I knew who he was! I felt all the muscles and nerves in my body tense, and for the first time in a long time, I managed to move. I threw my arm up and planted my hand against the glass, trying to reach for him. I felt like I couldn't talk, but I had to call out after him. He had already turned away. So I choked out a bit of breath and forced my tongue to speak at least his name, and it came out as a yell.

"Angeal!" I screamed, gasping for air in the tube, "Wait!"

But he was already gone...


	34. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 4

**Cloud**

It was so difficult to convince myself that I wasn't dead. All I remembered was Sephiroth's sword cutting through me, and how I somehow found the strength to toss him away. I remembered having a feeling of closure, so I must have finished him, and then came the feeling of acceptance. I accepted the fact that the end had come for me. It seemed fitting somehow, in a morbid and unfair way, that everything should have happened that way. I never made it into SOLDIER, never gained the acceptance of Tifa's father, and never fulfilled my dreams. It only made sense that my hometown would be destroyed, and my family killed, and one person, the one I vowed to protect when she needed me, would get hurt, all because of the man I idolized and based my dreams off of. My entire life had been a failure, and it all ended in destruction. Zack would have hated me if he heard me say it, but it all seemed to fit.

When the men in the coats came and picked me up off of those metal stairs, I barely felt it. I figured I had to be dead. I must have lost too much blood when I was laying there. I didn't even know how they could have found us. Didn't everyone die in the fire? I didn't know what I'd do if I wasn't dead. Zack was alive, I believed, because I heard his voice before passing out. Tifa's condition wasn't too bad when I looked at her, but what if Sephiroth came back? No, he couldn't have come back. Otherwise, I wouldn't be alive anymore, unless he still thought absolutely nothing of me. I remembered what he said as he came out to see me holding Tifa. _How dare you_, he said, as though I had no right to have touched him at all. He spoke as though I had no right to have attacked him, even after he destroyed my entire life before my eyes. Just the thought of him made me angry, but then my head felt very light, and I grunted, and reality struck again. I noticed that I was on a stretcher then, and that there was a man looking over me. Nobody seemed too worried, so my wounds either weren't that bad, or I really _was_ already dead.

I watched the sky as the men took me out of the reactor, but I had a blank in my memory after that. I guessed I must have feinted again. A lot of what I went through during that time happened with my eyes closed. I remembered hearing voices talking about Mako, and I remembered my arm hurting. I remembered it hurting a lot, but for some reason I couldn't react. Then, I remembered being in a tube, and it was filling with liquid. The liquid burned at first, but then it just put me to sleep. Things started to go even more fuzzy in my head after that.

One day, I woke up on the bed in the Nibelheim inn. The town wasn't damaged at all, and despite knowing that didn't make any sense, I couldn't help but believe it was true. Everything was just so real. I could even feel the fabric of the bedsheets under my hand. When I stood up and looked out the window, I saw Zack down by the well, and there was a kid playing nearby. Zack looked up at me and smiled, then waved. I had already seen that happen. Then I knew what day that was. I was seeing the sixth day after we came to Nibelheim. Somehow, I still couldn't convince myself that wasn't right, so I smiled and waved back, and moved downstairs to meet him. When I stepped out, Zack approached me with a grin.

"Rise and shine!" he said, putting a hand on my shoulder. "You're a late sleeper on your own accord, huh?"

"I guess." I shrugged and scratched the back of my neck, just under my helmet. "What have you been doing?"

"Not much." He shrugged back, taking his hand off my shoulder. "Reins was getting impatient this morning. He figured out that our mission's been over for a while." Wait... Zack didn't know our driver's name. What was it again? Why couldn't _I_ remember his name? Zack just said it...

"Dallert's not complaining?" I asked, and Zack shook his head.

"Nah... he seems to be taking this whole things as a vacation," he answered after a moment, turning and walking a few steps. "I caught him poking around at the shop earlier."

"I don't blame him," I said, glancing over to the shop by the inn. It still seemed strange that it wasn't burnt down. "Not much else to do here."

"Hey, Cloud?" he said after a pause.

"Huh?" I turned to look at him, and he was staring off toward the entrance of town. There was a long pause before he continued. I almost decided to respond again.

"If it's alright with you..." he started, but paused again. Then he turned around to face me, looking serious. "When we get back, I'd like to recommend you for SOLDIER." I took a deep breath, and felt myself stop. Zack... just... he didn't say that then. Something hit me, and I realized that he wasn't supposed to have said that there. All of a sudden, I felt my nerves tense and my body jumped. For no particular reason, fear washed over me, and I was startled awake to find myself floating in a test tube full of a green liquid. My nerves were still tense, and my heart was racing, and I had no idea why.

It felt like days passed by, but I was barely awake for any of it. The next time I woke, I was being taken out of the tube, and I was coughing uncontrollably. I actually coughed until I feinted again. During another time I woke up, I found myself on a table, shivering through my entire body like a seizure. I heard somebody say how 'he' wasn't taking to the treatments well, and I could only assume they meant me. Then, I woke up again and my body was in pain all over. Each time I woke up, I felt like I had just been having a dream about something else, and it started to become difficult to tell what was real and what wasn't.

One moment, I was in a train station in Midgar, fending off Shinra haters with some other infantrymen. The next moment, I was propped against a wall, strapped into something and having my blood drawn by scientists. I wasn't even sure if that was what was really happening to me, or if it was just another dream. I'd be having lunch in the cafeteria of the company building, and then fighting off bombs on Mt. Nibel. I was really losing it.

A scientist woke me one day, and I didn't even remember the circumstances that led me to that place. We were in a small lab, and there were book shelves against the walls. Several machines were making beeping and buzzing noises, and the scientist was moving this weird light around in front of my face.

"Can you turn your eyes with the light?" he asked, but I didn't even knew what he meant. I wondered what I was doing down there. Were they giving me Mako treatments so that I'd be a SOLDIER? Zack must have recommended me. I couldn't wait to let my mother know, and to let Tifa know. Wait... was my mother away? Oh... no... the town burned away. She was dead.

I didn't open my eyes again for a while. At one point, I heard some people talking about how 'his' condition was worsening. I heard one man tell the other one to keep at it. He said that if 'he' didn't pull through, at least 'he''d make a decent monster. I heard that man's voice a few more times, calling 'him' a failed experiment, or saying that 'he' was useless if he was taken off the treatment. All I heard after that was reports on how 'he' wasn't showing any signs of improvement. All I could feel was a deep sickness that ran through my stomach, and I knew that they were talking about me every time.

A long time went by after that. I didn't know how much time it really was, but I might as well have been in limbo. I couldn't feel anything apart from being sick. I was just floating there, my body in a state of suspension, and people didn't even bother to take me out anymore, or to flash lights that they wanted my eyes to follow. So many dreams flashed through my head. I got so hot sometimes, and sometimes so cold, or so sick, or there would be so much pain. None of those things were as bad as the times that I just couldn't feel anything at all. I just wanted it to end, in one way or another. It had to end.

I woke up on my bed in the Nibelheim inn, stretching out my arms and feeling the pages of my journal brushing against my wrist from the nightstand. It was all so real. I could even feel the fabric of the bedsheets underneath my head. I sat up, stretching again, and pushed myself off the bed. Stopping at the window before I went downstairs, I noticed Zack out by the well where another kid was playing. He looked up to me and waved, and I remembered what day it was. We had been in Nibelheim for six days now. Six days out of seven. Seven days. How did I know there were only seven days?

My eyes flicked open, though I hadn't even shut them in the dream. I was still floating in the tube, and I couldn't keep my eyes from drifting closed again, but I could hear something. This time, it wasn't a scientist, or an unfamiliar voice. Along with the gentle buzzing of the machines, I could hear the sound of someone moving around in liquid, and patting against glass. There was someone else in a tube down there. That entire time, I had thought I was alone. Then, someone spoke, muffled by water, but I still recognized who it was. It was Zack's voice!

"Wait!" he said, and more fumbling noises followed. Zack was alive, and he was there with me, and he was well enough to talk! I hoped with all the strength I had left that that was not just another dream. I waited to hear him say something else, but he didn't. In time, the other tube went silent, but I didn't feel so alone anymore. I couldn't really remember why I thought that Zack was dead, or even why I was in a tube in the first place, but I finally had a little more hope. Something a little positive came along, and I could go back to sleep now, to hope some more.


	35. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 5

**Zack**

It was all dark. Everything just went black. It seemed like I'd fallen unconscious, but I felt like I was awake. I was too aware to be unconscious. I was walking somewhere, I thought, but I couldn't see anything. Then, I fell on my knees, or at least it felt like I did. I mean, I was actually floating in a tube, right?

"You tarnish the SOLDIER name." I heard Angeal's voice again. Before everything went black, I had seen him just outside the test tube, staring at me. "Hold on to your honor. Isn't that what I always told you?" he said, and I raised my head to listen to him. "You've given up, right? So how can you call yourself a SOLDIER?"

"Angeal... I... I just don't know what to do..." I said, gripping my fists shut tight. "All I wanted to do was to keep people safe, and I couldn't. I couldn't save a single person..." I felt myself stutter my next words. "I've... failed."

"Are you dead, Zack?" he asked me, and I gasped. I made a little choking noise before I could get any words out.

"I... no... I don't think so..." I stared at my own hands just to be sure I was still there.

"Then you haven't failed," he said sternly. "You've given up." I froze at his words, and then sighed as I lowered my hands. The silence kept up long enough for me to believe that Angeal had left, but then he spoke again. "Remember when you first came to SOLDIER, Zack?"

"I guess..." I said, trying to recall. "It seems like such a long time ago..."

"Even the first few levels of simulation were out of your league. You were a restless puppy." I heard him laugh a little. "On a skill level, you were nothing special. Compared to the other candidates, you were mediocre at best."

"Tch..." I hung my head and scratched at the back of my neck. I wasn't sure why he was reminding me of this.

"Still, I chose to be your mentor over any of the others, and it wasn't because of your skill. It was because of your perseverance." I looked up again, wishing I could stare him in the face. I wanted to see the truth in his eyes as well as his words. "You kept going back, Zack," he continued. "You were the last one in that room, hours after everyone else left, just playing and replaying each simulation until you were a pro." I smiled to myself as I thought back on that. "It didn't matter to you whether or not you were perfect on your first try. You just kept trying until you got it right. Zack... you never gave up."

I tensed my fists before pushing myself up from the ground and running my eyes over the darkness. With another step forward, I was suddenly engulfed in white light and found myself standing in a blue sky among the clouds. I took a deep breath, noticing a figure before me, covered in light. Out from the light stretched one great white wing. Angeal's wing.

"Angeal," I said, hoping for some proof that it was really him.

"I'm sorry," he said softly. "It must be strange, getting lectured by a monster."

"Don't even say that..." I shook my head, feeling my fist clench again. He laughed.

"Yeah, I know..." he said, smiling at me. "Wings of an Angel... right?" I couldn't get myself to try and look through the light, to find his eyes. I was too filled up with emotions and confusion, and I just didn't know what to say. Just as I attempted to speak, he spoke first. "I can't be your mentor right now, Zack, but I can still be your friend," he said, floating up into the air. "And I ask this of you as a friend... Zack, don't give up." His wing beat a single time and propelled him up into the clouds like a ray of light.

"Please, Angeal...!" I yelled, outstretching my arm after him. "Wait!" As I watched the clouds, my eyes darted around and my arm lowered. Then, I noticed something falling from the sky. A single white feather slowly drifted down past my face, and I kept my eyes locked on it. As it reached the air by my feet, where I stood as though it were ground, a ripple formed beneath it and coursed gently through the sky. I grew calm again, and turned my head back up to the clouds. "Those wings..." I said quietly, gathering my thoughts. "I want them, too." Everything shattered after that. The sky, the clouds, everything just broke like glass and I was left again in the darkness. But when I woke up, I found myself in a new situation.

My eyes opened to see the stone floor of the Shinra Manor laboratory. I wasn't on a bed this time. I was on the floor, and there were shards of green glass all around me. I raised my head a little and looked around, and I could tell that I was the only conscious person there. Behind me, I knew there was another test tube. That was where they were keeping Cloud. Just as I went to get up, I heard the door to the room we were in opening, so I laid back down and pretended I was asleep. Footsteps followed the sound of the door closing, and it was only one person if I was right. I heard them stop, and then they started to come closer to me. All of a sudden, I sprang up, or at least I tried to. Standing was harder than I figured it would be, but luckily enough, the person was just a single scientist that was too startled by my presence to act as I stumbled to my feet. Running at him, I dropped the man in a single punch and almost fell over myself, placing my hand against the wall for support. When I was sure the scientist was unconscious, I turned back around and started to walk to the test tube that _wasn't_ broken.

As I walked over, I shook my arms a bit in an attempt to dry off some of the lingering mako. I could tell that I was limping, and my stomach felt weird, so it must have been a strong dose. When I got to the tube, I stared inside. Cloud was floating there, nearly motionless, with his eyes shut. For some reason, it felt like it had been a really long time since I'd seen him, even if it had only been a few weeks, and I was anxious to get him out of there. Looking over the tube, I found a release on the side that started to drain out the liquid. I took a step back as the door opened, and Cloud fell out, limply.

I reached and caught Cloud quickly, before he could fall on the stone floor, and as I felt my arms wrap around his back, I realized exactly how much I'd missed him. Cloud could have died in the fire at Nibelheim. He could have died when he challenged Sephiroth. He could have died when Hojo was experimenting on him. The mako was coming off his body in a green steam. It all hit me hard, how much I was worried about him, and I held him tight, so relieved to just feel him breathing against me.

"Cloud..." I said, holding my mouth by his ear. I hoped he would respond back, but he remained silent. After a moment, I slowly carried him to the table in the center of the room, and rested him up against it. Then I turned to the scientist, checking to make sure he was still knocked out, before noticing my sword against the wall. I walked over and grabbed the hilt of the Buster Sword, figuring that I might need it to get out of there. The basement was so dirty that the sword had already been covered in dust. "All right," I said, feeling a bit stronger with the Buster back in my hand, "let's go!" I moved back over to Cloud and lifted him to his feet, pulling his arm up over my shoulder. "Let's get you out of here."

Carrying Cloud out of the basement, I didn't encounter even one other scientist. The only thing there was an excess of monsters, and I had to keep leaving Cloud behind as I cleared a path. Finally, after what took much longer than I thought it could, I managed to take Cloud out through the hidden door in the Manor and shut it behind me.

"All right..." I huffed. "Just a little further." One step at a time, we finally made it down the old, creaky stairs and out into the light of day. The whole area was overcast and there was still nobody else around. Moving out past the mansion's gate, I leaned Cloud up against a stone wall and sighed. Carrying him shouldn't have gotten me as tired as it did. After a few breaths, I picked him back up and started to walk again in the direction of the town. "Feels good to be outside, anyway," I said to myself, still hoping to hear Cloud talk back. I heard him grunt, and I perked up a bit, but he was still out of it.

Moments after leaving that wall by the Manor, I saw the strangest thing, and it froze me in my path. After blinking myself back into focus, I rested Cloud down next to me and took a few more steps ahead, looking in awe around the area.

"What's going on...?" I said to myself, unable to believe my eyes. "I saw the town reduced to ashes, but it's back to the way it was before..." Not a single building was in shambles, nor did one show any sign of being burned or damaged in any way. The well stood high as it was the night I came out and talked to Cloud, and I could see Cloud's house looking as inviting as it did that night I visited. How could that be? Then, I saw a number of Shinra infantry running into the town in a hurry. Either out of a desperate hope, or the strange delirium brought on by the town's condition, I thought for a moment that they were there as backup. That was until one of them spoke at a safe distance away.

"It's a breakout!" he shouted, calling the rest of the troops to hurry into town. I grimaced and drew my sword as the four men stormed in and readied their guns. "The professor's test samples are escaping!" Test samples, he said. Was that all I was considered then? Was Shinra really so self absorbed that one of their own employees could go from being a SOLDIER first class to a test sample in a matter of weeks? The whole thing was maddening, and I firmly gripped my blade as I stared the men down.

"It'll take more than just your average grunt to take me down!" As I spoke, another infantryman came down a staircase to my side, and two more came from behind me. Then, one of them reached for Cloud and began to drag him away. "Cloud!" I yelled, turning to face him, and a bullet whisked by my ear. I gasped and turned back around, looking for the culprit. I took note of their increased numbers, and it looked like there was more coming from just outside the town. "This is bad!" I said. "I'd better take care of them quickly. I'm not gonna get caught again!" I rushed forward and slammed my shoulder into one of the men before any of them had a chance to react. The trooper went flying into a wooden post and fell to the ground.

"Dammit!" one of the men said as they stepped back away from me. "You can surrender and we won't have to fire on you!"

"Not a chance!" I yelled, running into the group of them and striking down the remaining three with a broad swing of the sword. More bullets sprayed by me, and one nicked my arm. Infantrymen were still flooding into the town, and I didn't think I'd ever seen that many in one place before, except for maybe at the company building itself. I rushed another cluster of the men, dodging the gunshots and striking at their heads and stomachs with the blunt parts of my weapon. I noticed that the men started to split up after that. There would be no more attacking groups then. I took a few more steps to knock another trooper to the ground, and shot a blast from my ice materia toward a man that was shooting at me by the inn. Just as I started to move again, a grenade rolled up in front of me with a clank, and I dove away only milliseconds before the blast. Rolling to my feet, I scanned the area for Cloud, and saw the same infantryman taking him toward the stairs, back in the direction of the Manor.

It wouldn't have normally taken me very long to cover the distance between me and Cloud, but it seemed like every army man there was bent on getting in my way. One man after another, I struck down everyone in my way, dodging and receiving a fair amount of bullets before I got to the man I was aiming for. The infantryman didn't even have a chance to draw his weapon before I bashed him away from Cloud and into a rock wall. Then, I spun around to see one man left. He stared at me for a few moments, before twitching and running out through the entrance of town. Normally, I probably would have followed him, but I was surprisingly exhausted. I put my hand on my head and felt the sweat, then I dropped to one knee next to Cloud.

"Whoa... what's wrong with me today?" I said, staring at the ground. "This can't be right... How can I be having trouble against these guys?" I stayed there for a second, and then let my eyes slowly drift along the ground to Cloud's boot, and then up his leg and his chest to his face. He was just as out of it as before, even through all that. I remembered the treatment we'd received in that basement. I got a heavy dose of mako, so did Cloud get the same thing? Without having had any mako exposure before, would he have been able to take it? I sighed and shook my head, and then stood back up. This wasn't over. I looked back up the stairs towards the place we came from. "I'll have to return to the mansion to regroup."

I took Cloud back up on my shoulder, my resolve as strong as ever. We made it out of captivity. We were not going back. I walked with Cloud again, back up the stairs, back through the outskirts of town, and back to the gate of the Shinra Manor.

"It's daytime, and we're still a little weak..." I said to Cloud, tensing the arm I held him with as I pushed the gate open with the other one. "Maybe we should rest until dark?" He said nothing as I brought him inside, back up the creaky stairs. I took him to the left, into the room that I slept in a few days before Sephiroth went mad, and rested him on the same bed. A lot of dust had settled there again.

"Ngh..." Cloud made a noise as he sat there, and I glanced over from the dresser I had turned to.

"Cloud..." I said, approaching him with my arm raised a little. I moved the bangs out from in front of his face, and his eyes were open a little, but he was still non-responsive. In a way, it was more worrying. "Could this be mako addiction...?" I sighed and fell back onto the floor behind myself, throwing my arms out beside me. "Angeal... Am I just not capable of saving anyone?" I stared at the roof. At first, I actually expected to hear him respond, or maybe I just hoped I would, but I remembered how he said he couldn't be my mentor anymore. No, I had to do this myself, and I wasn't going to give up. I owed Angeal that much, and I owed it to Cloud too. "All right!" I said, flipping up into a sitting position. "First, a change of clothes." I stood myself up and smiled down at Cloud. "Those mako-soaked clothes will definitely not help you on your road to recovery. I found something good back there." I gestured over my shoulder and turned back to the dresser. There, inside, was my spare SOLDIER first class uniform. I remembered hanging it there on my last visit, and I figured that at this point, Cloud wouldn't get in any more trouble for wearing it.

"It may not smell very good," I said, removing it from the musty dresser, "but we can't be too picky right now." I walked back to Cloud, sat the uniform on the bed next to him, and crossed my arms. I made a noise in consideration. Cloud wasn't going to move at all, at least not yet, but he had to get out of those clothes. I started to unclasp and remove the plates of armor on him and his boots, but the last clasp finally came down to being on his belt. I brought my hands to it and looked up at him. "I'll... try not to look... okay?" His silence had to suffice, and so I unclasped the belt, pulled it off, and slid off his pants with his boots. A final light stream of mako energy steamed off of his now bare legs, and I started to dry them with a blanket I'd taken from another bed. "This should be better," I said to him. "And I'll be fine in my own clothes. They've already started to dry with all the running around I've been doing." I laughed, and raised his arms to slide his shirt off over his head. I waited for the green steam to leave his stomach before I started to dry him again. His eyes weren't even following my hands on his chest, but he was blinking every now and then. "I don't know if you can hear me," I said as I moved up to dry his neck and his hair, "but I guess I should probably keep talking to you, huh?" I rubbed the corner of the blanket along the hair on the top of his head, and then pulled back his bangs so that I could get a good look at him. He blinked a couple of times, and I smiled at him. "We wouldn't want you to get bored, right?"

After that, I suited Cloud up in his new uniform. As soon as I was done fastening on the second shoulder piece, I took a step back away from him and looked him over.

"Looks pretty good on you." I smiled, one hand on my hip. Cloud would have made a great SOLDIER. Maybe he was a SOLDIER then, even if he wasn't in Shinra. I mean, I was the only first class left, so that would have been largely my choice, right? But I didn't even know if _I_ could be considered a SOLDIER anymore. I sighed and turned away from Cloud, placing my hands in my pockets. I knew that Angeal was still calling me a SOLDIER, but he wasn't with Shinra either. He wasn't even with _me_. I needed to see someone friendly, someone I could talk to.

Then, I felt something in my pocket, so I took it out. It was a piece of paper, a list that Aerith had made for me a while ago. I remembered what I had said to her.

"They're tiny, but you have lots, right?" It was about her wishes. All of the little things she wanted to happen or to have one day. She told me she had twenty-three things she really wished for, so I had her write them down, so that I wouldn't forget. She told me... she'd like to spend more time with me.

"Hey, Cloud," I said softly, putting the paper back in my pocket and staring out the window. "I... I have to go to Midgar." I turned around to look at him, laying there, and I leaned over him. He looked so peaceful, even if he was sick, so I smiled again. "You wanna come with me?"


	36. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 6

**Cloud**

I heard glass shatter. I wasn't really sure from where, and it sounded kind of muffled or distant. Then, a minute later, I felt cold, and I got a sensation like I was falling. My eyes flicked open and I grabbed the bedsheets under my hand. I was in my bed in the Nibelheim inn. My wrist brushed against the pages of a journal on the nightstand. I wondered what kind of dream I was having, but it was gone. I sat up, stretching, and pushed myself off the bed. For some reason, I expected something to be broken, damaged in someway. I wasn't really sure what I was thinking. Maybe I'd had some strange thought that the town would be attacked while I was in bed. Maybe that was what I'd dreamed about. I walked up to the window by the stairs and looked out at the town. Zack was out there by the well, and he looked lonely. There wasn't even a kid playing nearby. Then, he looked up at me and smiled, waving, so I waved back.

As I walked down the stairs to go meet Zack, I felt bad for him. It was the sixth day that we had been at Nibelheim, and we'd been done with our mission for days. He and the other two infantrymen must have been pretty bored. Sephiroth had some nerve keeping us all there waiting for him for those days, without even a word. I guess he thought he had the right though, and he probably did. He could take down the entire town single-handed if he wanted to, so there was no harm in letting him read a few books if it would spare us some trouble. When I stepped out, Zack approached me with a grin.

"Rise and shine!" he said, putting a hand on my shoulder. "You're a late sleeper on your own accord, huh?"

"I guess." I shrugged and put my hands on my hips. "What have you been doing?"

"Not much." He shrugged back, taking his hand off my shoulder. "Our driver was getting impatient this morning. He figured out that our mission's been over for a while." Our driver, he said. I thought about how funny it was that me and Zack had gotten so close as an infantryman and a first class SOLDIER, and yet neither of us even knew the name of one of the two infantrymen stationed with us.

"Dallert's not complaining?" I asked, testing his knowledge on that name, and he shook his head.

"Nah... he seems to be taking this whole thing as a vacation," he said after a moment, turning and walking a few steps. "I caught him poking around at the shop earlier."

"I don't blame him," I said, glancing over to the shop by the inn. Something seemed strange about it. Maybe the sign had been broken or something? "Not much else to do here."

"Hey, Cloud?" he said after a pause.

"Huh?" I turned to look at him, and he was staring off toward the entrance of town. There was a long pause before he spoke again. I almost decided to respond again.

"If you think you're up to it..." he started, but paused again. Then he turned around with a big grin on his face. "I'd like to spar with you."

"...Spar?" I repeated, having a hard time accepting the word. Zack wanted to battle with me?

"_If_ you think you're up to it," he said in a cocky voice, raising his chin. "You _are_ going to be in SOLDIER, right?"

"Sure, but I'm not yet." I scratched the back of my neck, just under my helmet. "I'm not even sure how I'll take the mako infusions..."

"Well, I'll hold back of course." He shrugged and then cocked his head at me. "Unless you're busy?" I thought about that. I figured this would just be another step in doing the things I was worried to do. I _did_ need the training if I wanted to make it into SOLDIER.

"No, I'll fight you." I nodded, and he laughed.

"Man, 'fight' makes it sound so brutal." He turned away from me and gestured toward the entrance to town. "There's a safe place we can go out there."

Minutes later, Zack had guided me out to a patch of land by the water, just outside of town. When he stopped walking, he spun on his heal to face me, grin still on his face. He seemed to be in a pretty good mood. I guessed he _was_ bored.

"You make the first move," he said, drawing his blade. "And tell me if it becomes too much at any point." I drew my sword as well, I guessed. I had a sword, right? I didn't really look at it. It just felt right. Then I stared at him for a long moment. Even though he looked calm and relaxed, there wasn't a single angle I could see that it made sense to try and approach him from. He was a SOLDIER, so he was trained to be ready for anything. How was I supposed to make the first move against _that_? He wasn't going to do anything until I did, however, so I just ran at him.

He was still smiling as I got close, and I swung my sword down at him from above. With a simple move of his arm, he blocked the attack and pushed me back a few feet. Then he moved to me and swung the blunt side of his sword. I didn't know how I would've blocked that even if I'd had the chance to move in time. His sword was huge. So I took the hit and fell to the ground on my side. I heard him touch his sword down on the ground, and I picked mine back up from next to me.

"Always try to turn those rough landings into a roll," he said, waiting for me to stand. "If you can manage to roll to your feet, that's excellent. Otherwise, you've at least dodged a potential attack." I nodded and ran at him again. This time, I figured he'd block my attack, so I hit continuously against his blade to try and break his guard. No such luck, however, and he knocked me back away from him with a push of his sword. I stumbled and fell backward, but managed to roll to the side upon landing. When I got back onto my feet, he nodded in acknowledgment and ran forward. I guarded his next attack, but the impact still pushed me backwards. Going in for another attack, I expected that my sword would clash with his again, and as it did, I took one hand off of the hilt in an attempt to punch him past his guard. Zack pulled a hand free in time to catch my fist, and still had enough strength in his other hand to put pressure against my sword. I watched it fly out of my grip and across the ground before turning my focus back to Zack.

"Still going easy?" I asked between breathes. He released my fist and we both lowered our arms.

"Well, I wasn't about to get hit in the face." He laughed and reached around in his pocket. "There _is _a form of attacking without your sword that people _can't_ catch," he said, lifting a bluish-green stone from his pocket and holding it in the air with two fingers. "At least I don't _think_ anyone can catch it."

"Is that... a materia?" I asked, tilting my head. Being an infantryman, I hadn't seen too many of them. Zack nodded and stepped closer to me.

"Yeah, and I'm gonna teach you how to use it." He held up my hand and gave me the hilt of his Buster Sword. "Your sword doesn't have any materia slots, so you'll have to use mine." He placed the materia into a small hole on his sword and stepped back.

"I don't think I can wield this..." I said, feeling the weight of his sword even as it rested on the ground.

"You don't need to use the sword," he explained, putting his hands on his hips. "It's magic, so it kind of floats through you. Just point your hand at the water and activate it."

"Just... activate it?" I asked, only feeling more confused.

"It's really easy, but kind of hard to explain." He shrugged. "Sort of like you're pulling a trigger." I looked at the water ahead of me and raised my hand up to aim at it. Like a trigger, huh? It sounded too easy, but it turned out that it was. I felt myself grip the hilt of the sword hard, and an energy flowed up through my body, down my arm, and out through the palm of my hand and my fingertips. Suddenly, a big ball of energy zipped toward the water and an ice cluster formed on the surface. The freezing spread along the water for a few feet in every direction. Then there was a cracking sound and the ice burst into sharp crystals. It was a very impressive sight, and I could understand why Shinra valued it so much. Materia had to be a major advantage when it came to warfare.

"Great job! You got it." Zack clapped a few times and then stretched his arms. "Now I'm tired." He walked over to the edge of the water and dropped down on his back, sighing as he laid there. "It's such a nice day," he said, and then remained quiet for a while. I looked up at the sky too, and then set the Buster down by a rock.

"Thanks for teaching me," I said, and he didn't respond.

"I wish I could show this sky to..." He paused and I started to walk over to him.

"Zack, we have to go soon." I wasn't really sure _why_ we had to go, but I felt like there was a reason. "Something the matter?"

"Eh, just guy stuff." He didn't even look at me as he answered, then he kicked his legs and somehow managed to end up standing on his feet. "Let's go!" I turned around to face the town, and an infantryman was running our way. I figured it was one of the ones we'd brought with us, but I didn't really recognize him.

"The professor's test samples are escaping!" he said in an unfamiliar voice. Then, my vision went black for a moment, and the next thing I knew, I was on the ground and someone was dragging me.

Everything went blurry after that...


	37. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 7

**A Heart For My Nobody says:**

**Hey all! Sorry it's been a few days longer than usual on this update. I'd had some electrical problems in my house, power outages and such, and after that I had company for four days straight, so writing was a tad more difficult than it usually is. Anyway, another thanks to everyone who has been leaving me reviews! You are all such wonderful people, and it definitely inspires me to keep going steadily at this! Thanks a bunch, and enjoy the new update!

* * *

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**Zack**

Nightfall came sooner than I was ready for, and the distant noises of armored boots began to break through the silence. Shinra was out there searching for us, and I wasn't about to let myself get caught again. I wasn't going to let Cloud get caught either. I knew we wouldn't stand much of a chance by staying indoors, so I collected my supplies, hoisted Cloud to his feet, and started to walk. My defenses were up as I brought the two of us down the creaking corridors of the mansion, and every new sound triggered even more awareness in me. I'd been feeling weak earlier that day, but it seemed that, after some rest, the Mako treatments had definitely made me stronger. I could feel it in how much easier it was to carry Cloud, and in strange new heightened senses. I wasn't sure how I managed to pick up the footsteps from outside, but I could.

I carried Cloud out into the night, through the suspiciously monster-free outskirts, and into the town. Part of me thought that I should be fleeing the other direction, as it was far more likely that I'd run into infantry in the town, but I knew it would be a bad idea to try and tackle Mt. Nibel in our current states, so I supposed I had to risk it. I actually got pretty far, but as the well came into my sight, so did three new troops. Unfortunately, they noticed me just as quickly as I noticed them, shattering any thoughts of sneaking by. So I set Cloud down by a building, drew my sword and faced them, determined to take them out before they could call for backup.

"This is pretty rough..." I said, eying the three guns that were trained on me. I rushed forward and hit the one on the right in the stomach, taking down the other two with my sword as he was stunned, and finally finished the first one off with a strong hit to the back. Then I heard the inn door closing as two more men had stepped out. Grunting at this, I dashed at them in a hope to take them both out before they had a chance to react. I only made it to one, however, as the other one stumbled backward and released a desperate frenzy of bullets in my direction. Luckily, due to the nature of the attack, only one bullet grazed my shoulder and the rest of them went through the window of the inn. That man was unconscious a moment later.

"Okay!" I said, huffing and turning to Cloud. "We're getting out of here. Stay with me." I picked him back up, scanning the area again, just to make sure it was safe, and then bringing my eyes back to his. "Cloud..." I sighed. "I'm sorry this all had to go this way."

About ten minutes later, we were well on our way down the road, away from Nibelheim, away from all the horror we just went through. I expected we'd encounter an infantry camp close to the town, but we found nothing. Just as I thought we may have caught a break, I saw a single trooper standing on the path, next to a small hill. He was dressed in a slightly different manor from the other infantrymen, and the gun he was carrying was a good deal bigger. Fortunately, his back was turned to us. I slowly set Cloud down on the ground, raising my finger to my lips just so that he knew to be quiet, and stepped up behind the man. Now, I'd never really practiced preforming silent take-downs before, but just about anyone would go down when hit hard enough in the head with some sort of heavy object. For a SOLDIER, just a fist would suffice. So I gave the man a good hit, and he joined the ranks of unconscious army men, letting his gun drop to his side before he did. It turned out to be a good thing that I did that silently, because my eyes locked onto a couple of Shinra's watchdog robots on the hills ahead. They were called Gun Bull Heads, and they were basically a robotic shield on wheels. Never easy to take out, having only one weak-spot on the front, which was their tiny little night-vision head.

"Damn it! There's no end to this!" I said, taking a look back at Cloud to make sure he was okay. My eyes wandered and found their way back to the gun that was dropped by the infantryman, and I knelt down to examine it. It was a sniper rifle, and equipped with some nice extra pieces at that. "This isn't really SOLDIER's style, but beggars can't be choosers," I decided aloud, picking the weapon up in both hands. "I hope I can get the hang of it..."

I placed the shoulder rest in position and brought my eye to the gun's focus. It was equipped with a target-aid, and I could immediately see the cross-hairs that marked the spot the bullet would go. I figured it seemed easy enough. Besides, I had nothing to lose, so I steadied my arms, took aim, and fired my first shot at the Bull Head. The gun recoiled a bit, as I knew it would, and I saw the bullet hit the front of the robot's shield hard. Unfortunately, that wasn't even enough to make a dent, and now it was aware of me. My next shot had to count, or it may have had the time to signal any other personnel in the area. I aimed again, and another shot was off. This time, I watched as the robotic head went up in a puff of smoke, toppling the whole thing over. It wasn't a very satisfying defeat, but it would have to do.

"Come on," I said, rejoining Cloud. "This could be a long night." As suspected, no sooner did I move on than I encountered another group of stationed watch-droids. In fact, they lined the entire path as I carried Cloud, step-by-step, away from the haunting images of his hometown. It wasn't until I came to the end of the path that the Bull Heads stopped showing up, and all that was before me was a starlit beach. My walk slowed as I stepped onto the sand of the beach, and I tossed away the rifle, happy to be done with it. Taking a look around, I spotted only a quiet lighthouse keeping us company. We were safe for now.

"Some peace at last, huh?" I smiled at Cloud, bringing him to the rock wall that framed the beach and setting him down against it. "It's a bit sandy." His body slid down into a sitting position on the ground, and feeling the weight off my shoulders, I decided to join him. I felt my boot push under the sand as I got comfortable, and I leaned my head back to the sky. "Too bad I can't doze off here." Cloud stayed quiet as usual.

I'd almost gotten myself into a daze, watching the light from the lighthouse illuminate the clouds, when it occurred to me that I still had my phone. I wondered if anyone had attempted to call me while I was missing, so I reach into my pocket and pulled it out, flipping it open as I did. I had quite a few emails, but most of them were unimportant. The one that caught my eye first was from Kunsel. I was sure that he'd let me in on my situation from the Shinra perspective. I clicked the message open.

_Subject: You can't fool me – From: Kunsel_

_ Zack, where could you possibly be? Let me know if you're reading this. You've gone missing _

_ since your mission with Sephiroth. Do you have anything to do with Sephiroth being killed in _

_ action? I heard rumors about something going down in Nibelheim. Are you there right now?_

I was surprised to read that Sephiroth had been pronounced 'killed in action' and I hadn't been. I wanted to respond back to the message, but it wasn't safe to. Friend or not, Kunsel was still part of Shinra, and they were probably screening the incoming media. What were they thinking? I never even did anything to betray the company. I snapped my phone shut with a sigh, leaning my head back again. Another few minutes went by, and I finally stood back up, planting my hand against the rock wall. The night air was chilly, but the ocean was mostly quiet. I listened to the soft sound of the waves breaking as I stepped closer to the water, hands on my hips.

"Huh... Where do I go from here?" I felt the question flow through the air with the wind. I wasn't really sure who I was asking at first. I could have been asking myself, or someone else entirely. All I knew was that I really wanted an answer. I looked back to Cloud, sitting against the rock, and let my eyes slowly drift back to the water. "Can't do much when I got Cloud to worry about..." I turned my gaze to a part in the clouds above, where the stars shined bright. "Angeal... what should I do?"

I stood there in silence, and as I lowered my head, I heard the sound of a small shifting in the sand behind me. Cloud was on my right, and that sound came from the left, so I knew it couldn't have been him. Without moving anything else, I turned my eye to find the source of the noise, and as I did, I smiled.

"Hey, Cissnei," I said without turning around. "Been a while." Cissnei of the Turks. I didn't recall even seeing her again since she'd been assigned to watch me all of those months ago, and yet there she was, just as I'd become a target. I supposed it wasn't surprising that she'd find me first.

"Zack..." I heard her say, trying to mask her gasp. "The fugitive sample..." There was hesitation in her voice. "Is it you?"

"It would appear so," I admitted with a hesitation of my own. There was a silence.

"What did they do to you in that place?" she asked. She sounded surprisingly caring, but I still couldn't help but feel as though Shinra knew no loyalty. I glanced back over my shoulder at her for the first time. Her hair looked a little different somehow since the last time I'd seen it, but those were the same golden eyes.

"Well... this and that..." I said plainly. It felt as though she was the first person I really talked to in a while, and it was hard to remember the situation at hand. I lowered my shoulders and turned around entirely to face her. "So, Cissnei, you're here to take us back, right?" She stared at me for a long moment, opening her mouth once, but no words came. Suddenly, I felt like it was too much. Just staring at her like that, questioning our loyalties... we used to be friends. It was just too much, so I reached out to her. "Please," I said, startling her into focus, "just walk away!" I clenched my fist and shook my head. "I thought we could outrun the army, but the Turks are a different story."

"Zack, I'm sorry..." she said, shutting her eyes tight before drawing her weapon: a large, red and silver shuriken. "This is my job." I was taken aback by her words as she readied the weapon. There really was no loyalty. "If you want to escape, you have to..." She hesitated once more and then tossed the shuriken directly at me. It wasn't hard to deflect with my sword, and I gritted my teeth as it ricocheted into the sand. She began to walk my way and I pointed the Buster at her.

"Step back," I said through my teeth, and to my surprise, she stopped. "Next time... I'll really have to..." I cut my own sentence short. Staring at her again, I couldn't bare the thought of harming a friend. I guessed that was just the difference between me and the rest of Shinra. Without saying anything else, I ran to Cloud and left the area with him. Cissnei didn't move from that spot.

Some distance away, I rested Cloud by another rock. I was feeling weak again. I supposed the negative effects from the Mako treatments hadn't run out yet. Taking a couple steps back, I looked over Cloud and he made a small noise.

"You don't like all this moving around either, do you?" I said, trying to keep a smile. Then I turned my eyes to the sky again. "The Turks are here, too. It's too dangerous to move now." I watched Cloud's chest rise and fall a few times before saying anything else. "We'll rest here until morning." I smiled again. "Then we'll leave at dawn." The wind blew past me, and it felt better to be smiling. I was pretty sure Cloud would have wanted me to smile. "Eh, we'll be all right," I said with confidence, and somehow that even made _me_ feel better. Then I heard another rustle, and turned around to see Cissnei approaching us yet again. I thought I'd actually gotten through to her. "Cissnei..." I said, slowly raising my hand and preparing my sword. She stopped a few feet in front of me, and her eyes turned to Cloud.

"Wait..." she said, taking another step. "He...he's the other sample they collected at Nibelheim." I sidestepped to put myself between her and Cloud, tensing my grip on the Buster Sword.

"Why did you come here!" I yelled, holding my position. "I told you to go away."

"He doesn't look well, Zack," she pushed, still gazing past me. "Is he all right?"

"Mako addiction." I scowled at the question. "Severe case."

"The experiments, isn't it?" she said, averting her eyes.

"Yeah." There was a long silence after my answer and she finally pulled a phone out from her pocket and dialed something. "Hey!" I yelled, but I was met with her hand, telling me to be quiet.

"Tseng," she said into the phone, and I felt startled to hear his name. "I've lost the target." I widened my eyes and let my sword lower to the ground. She... lost the target? Cissnei was actually helping us out. She shut the phone and it beeped, then she turned back to me. "That's how it is... so get away safely." She smiled and turned to walk away.

"Cissnei..." I said, even though I was finding it hard to speak, "thank you." She turned back around to smile at me, holding something in her hand.

"Here's a present," she said, walking back my direction and holding out a set of keys. I took them, feeling a bit confused, and looked back at her. "If you think you can trust me," she started, staring hard into my eyes, "then use it."

With those last words, Cissnei was gone into the night. I found myself staring off in the direction she left long after she was out of my sight, and then I finally moved to rejoin Cloud by the rock. I dropped down with a sigh next to him, but for the first time in a while, it was a good sigh. I threw my arm over his shoulder, holding the keys in front of us with the other one.

"It looks like the keys to a motorcycle," I said to him, leaning in. "I guess we really weren't the only nice people in Shinra." I smiled and put the keys in my pocket. "If we get out of this, we'll have to repay her one day." Cloud and I leaned together as we sat there, and sometime only a matter of minutes later, I finally drifted off to a well needed sleep. Perhaps tomorrow would bring better things.


	38. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 8

**Cloud**

I heard glass shatter, and my eyes blinked open. The sound presumably came from outside the building. Morning had already rolled around, and it appeared as though I'd slept in. Stretching on the bedsheets, I felt my hand brush against a journal on the table between Zack's bed and mine, and I sat up to look at it. I figured it was probably his, a recording of his mission progress or maybe something more personal. I had to fight the urge to read it for either reason. If the journal was about his missions, it may have told me about what happened in that reactor, or why Sephiroth had been gone for so long. If it was a personal journal, it may have mentioned me, or perhaps my mom, and that thought made it even more tempting to read. However, I didn't really see myself as the type to go snooping through someone else's writings, even if the concept seemed somehow familiar to me.

Kicking my legs off the bed, I stretched my arms again, did a few squats for good measure, and started to walk out of the room. I noticed Zack outside the window, standing alone by the town's well. He noticed me too, and gave me a wave, so I smiled and started down the stares to leave the inn. It was now day six at Nibelheim, and despite being in a pretty good mood myself, I kind of felt bad for Zack and the other two infantrymen. They were being forced to just sit around and wait, in a town that they weren't all that familiar with, counting the minutes until Sephiroth came up from his hole under the Manor. Still, it didn't seem like a good idea to rush the guy, especially after he'd been acting so strange. Zack noticed me when I stepped out, and I approached him with a grin.

"Rise and shine!" he said, and I put my hand on his shoulder as a sort of 'good morning'. "You're a late sleeper on your own accord, huh?"

"I guess." I shrugged and took back my hand, placing it on my hip. "What have you been doing?"

"Not much," he said, scratching the back of his neck. "Our driver was getting impatient this morning. He figured out that our mission's been over for a while." I considered the fact that I still didn't know the driver's name.

"The other guy's not complaining?" I asked, the name on the tip of my tongue.

"No... he seems to be taking this whole things as a vacation," he said after a moment, turning and walking a few steps. "I noticed him looking around at the shop earlier."

"I don't blame him," I said, trying to remember exactly where the shop was. "Not much else to do here."

"Hey, Cloud?" he said after a pause.

"Huh?" I turned to look at him, and he was staring off toward the entrance of town. There was a long pause before he spoke again. I almost decided to respond again.

"If you're okay with it..." he started, but paused again. Then he turned around with a smile. "I'd like to spar with you."

"Spar?" I repeated, having a hard time accepting the word. Zack wanted to battle with _me_?

"_If_ you think I'm up to it," he laughed, raising his chin. "...going to be in SOLDIER, right?" I felt like I missed a piece of what he said, but my hearing seemed fine. What was there to lose, anyway?

"Sure, but..." I took a step forward on one foot, crossing my arms. I was going to say something else, but my mind had a blank moment.

"...hold back of course." Zack said and cocked his head. "Unless you're busy." I thought about how this was a good step, sort of a closing in the gap of our ranks, at least for a fight.

"At least for a fight." I thought aloud, and he took that to be my answer.

"Man, 'fight' makes it sound so brutal." He turned away from me and gestured toward the entrance to town. "There's a safe place we can go out there."

We fought, minutes later, just outside the town by the water. I didn't really have a great memory of that fight. I remember something about rolling and guarding, or maybe catching Zack's hand at one point. I remembered testing materia for the first time, remembered the water freezing, and it looked so nice for something that was meant to be used in war. But the battle was mostly a blur, some kind of strange mix of adrenaline and a weird euphoria. In a way, it felt more like a connection, like I was closer to Zack than I'd ever been before, even more than that night on the roof, under the stars and Mt. Nibel. The memories came back sometime afterward, when Zack had taken a break because of exhaustion, and he said something that I didn't quite hear, but I didn't quite like.

"Zack, we have to go soon," I said, looking down at him as he laid by the water. I felt a strange discomfort at the time, as though their was something important that needed to be done."Something the matter?"

"Eh, just guy stuff." He didn't even look at me as he answered, then he kicked his legs and somehow managed to end up standing on his feet. "Let's go!" I turned around to face the town, and a man was running our way. I didn't really recognize him at first, but as he got closer, I noticed that it was Tifa's father. His eyes locked on me first, and he stopped, hesitating before he spoke. When the words finally came, he looked to Zack as though I wasn't there. Why was he looking at Zack?

"You're not leaving," he said, sounding a little out of breath, "are you?"

My eyes opened up again, though I hadn't realized that I'd closed them. I was very tired, so I guessed I must have been sleeping. I was sitting on the grass and I could hear water nearby, so Zack and I must have still been just outside of town. My back was also against a rock, and my body felt sore all over, but at the same time, something was comfortable about the whole thing. Then I noticed Zack, leaning against my side, also on the grass, also against the rock. I thought I heard him say something too.

"If we...of this, we'll have...one day." I missed a few bits of it, and really had no clue what he said. I wanted to ask him, but the words wouldn't come. All the same, something about it was comfortable. A few minutes later, Zack was asleep, and I was smiling, or at least it felt like I was. I couldn't help but to wonder why I couldn't remember the rest of my day. Nibelheim day six, right?

It was Nibelheim day six, and Zack and I had just come back into town after our sparring match. We didn't say much on the walk in. I thought Zack had picked up on a bit of the uneasiness with Tifa's father back there, so I stayed silent and waited for him to say something. After walking into the center of town, I slowed to a stop by the well. It had become sort of a comfortable place for me to just stop and think, and I kind of needed a little peace of mind. I turned around to look at Zack, and just before I could think of something to say, he spoke first.

"Going to see your mom today?" he said, throwing his arms up behind his head and interlocking his fingers. I smiled a little and averted my eyes from him. For some reason, the question made it hard to keep eye contact.

"No, I..." I started, pacing a few steps. "I figured it'd just be us today." He seemed strangely surprised by that concept, which only made it harder to look at him while I talked. "I mean, we probably won't be here much longer, so I figured we'd enjoy ourselves instead of..."

"Just another day of guard duty?" Zack finished my sentence. "Yeah, that would be nice."

"At least we're stationed out here and not inside the reactor, right?" I shrugged, taking a breath of the fresh air. Zack nodded.

"Tch, yeah..." he agreed, walking up closer to me. "Those places smell weird. So what do we do for fun around here?"

"We could start by getting something to eat." I gestured at the shop, just then remembering where it was. "All that fighting made me hungry." Zack laughed and threw open the door to the mobile home. My mind went blank again. The fact that I was missing pieces of things didn't bother me before then. I didn't really register the fact that my mind kept going blank, or that I'd missed part of a conversation, or ended up in a place that I wasn't before. Then suddenly, it all hit me at once, and it wasn't something that I could just shrug off because I was comfortable.

This time, I was worried; worried for myself, worried about waking up in all these different places, worried about something I couldn't put my finger on, as though I was being followed. I was tired again, and I was sitting again, but this time it wasn't on grass. I was sitting on metal, and I could smell gunpowder. The only thing that made me feel any better was that I could hear Zack saying something, and he sounded happy.

I was a SOLDIER then, right? Zack said I'd be a SOLDIER. I should have been ready for anything. But how was I supposed to be ready for that? I had some recollection of Mako, recently. Was that all just a hallucination from the treatments? Maybe the blackouts were a side effect. But why did something about SOLDIER just not feel right? I was worried about how hard it was to think clearly, and even more worried about how it seemed to be getting harder.

A few moments later, I heard the sound of a motorcycle.


	39. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 9

**A Heart For My Nobody says:**

**Hey all! Many apologies for having a longer break than usual between updates. My poor, poor computer was ravaged with a terrible virus, and in the end I couldn't save it. So alas, I've come back to you on a new, more protected computer with shiny new files to post! I should be back to a regular six day average on my updates now, as long as everything goes well with the new system (hope for me). Anyway, please enjoy the update!

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**

**Zack**

Cissnei knew what she was doing when she helped out me and Cloud. It wasn't even a mile away from where we set off that morning that the two of us spotted a small, metal Shinra outpost, and sure enough there was a motorcycle. Naturally, it didn't take much effort to clear the place out, despite the fact that they had an aerial robot bent on filling the walls with bullets in an attempt to take me down. In the end, it was pretty clear that I'd gotten my fight back. I supposed all I needed was a little bit of support and a good nights rest. I spun my sword around and returned it to my back, facing Cloud with a smile. He was leaned up against a metal wall nearby, a good deal away from the bullets.

"Looks like we've got ourselves a ride." I gestured at the motorcycle and then walked over to it. "Now... do these keys work...?" With a jingle, the keys pushed into the ignition, turned, and the engine started up. It was such a refreshing sound. Whether I had my fight back or not, I'd gotten pretty tired of walking at that point, and that was a very welcomed change of pace, even if it _would_ make us easier to detect. "All right!" I said, walking back to Cloud and helping him up to his feet. "Let's ride." Cloud made a small noise as I rested him down in the side seat, and shortly after we were off.

The terrain by the outpost had switched pretty quickly from being grassy to dusty and rocky. I sort of recognized where we were, since we'd passed through the area on our drive to Nibelheim, but there were a lot of mountainous patches around, and I couldn't manage to find the more gentle path that our driver had taken us on. Luckily, I noticed a large metal bridge that our driver must not have been aware of. It was set up as an easier route passed the mountains and over the water. If it wasn't for the large scale highway appearance of the thing, I'd have said that it was set up recently, after our truck had come through. I just didn't know how someone could miss something like that. The important thing was, _I_ didn't miss it, and it looked like a helpful shortcut on my way back to Midgar.

As I pressed my foot down harder against the pedal, I glanced over at Cloud. He had his eyes shut at the moment, and was leaned over in his seat. I couldn't help but smile.

"I don't think I've ever seen someone look that relaxed on a motorcycle," I said, raising my voice over the sound of the engine. I thought I heard Cloud make another noise, something I was beginning to take as a sign that he was still with me more than he seemed. "I guess this thing _does_ ride pretty smoothly." We crossed from rock onto metal as we came to the bridge, and it became even less bumpy. "Say what you want about their loyalty..." I laughed, revving the bike's engine a bit. "Shinra makes good stuff!"

I had a smile on my face and the wind in my hair as I zipped down the straightaway. As far as being pursued by the army went, I didn't think things could go any easier. Those thoughts were probably what jinxed me, but just moments later I saw two figures perched on one of the support structures ahead of me. I had expected to encounter some trouble on my way across the bridge, and was fully ready to maneuver the bike out of the path of any projectiles the infantry could throw at me, but once I drove closer, I could see that those were no employees of Shinra. The two men got to their feet, each of them raising a single black wing. They were Genesis copies.

"Not again!" I said, pressing my foot on the brake. The bike swerved and screeched to a stop, and I kicked my leg over the side to get off. I gritted me teeth as I approached the copies, and they seemed quiet content with waiting for me to come to them. My sword was drawn and I swung it once in the air for good measure as I walked. Suddenly, something hit me hard in the middle of my back. I yelled as I fell to the ground, rolling to change my direction and face the perpetrator. Who I saw froze me in place. I shouldn't have been too surprised, I suppose, when Genesis drifted to the ground with another one of his Banora apples in hand, but for some reason I hadn't considered him. On top of that, the degradation process seemed to have sped up, as his entire appearance was more pale, he had more white strands in his hair, and even the upper portion of his uniform was going gray, as though it was a part of him.

I tried to get back to my feet, but I was rushed by the two copies behind me, and they held me in place. I shook and pulled at my limbs, but either those guys had gotten stronger, or that hit to my back really took a lot out of me. I was stuck.

"Get off me!" I yelled, wincing at my situation, and at the clenched fist on my head. "Ow, my hair! Stop pulling!"

"When the war of the beasts brings about the world's end, the goddess descends from the sky," Genesis recited, quoting yet another line from the LOVELESS poem. "Wings of light and dark spread afar." He raised the arm with the apple in my direction. "She guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting." Feeling a bit of relief on my head, my attention was drawn to the copy on my left, who was now holding a detached clump of my hair in his hand.

"That's my hair!" I protested, trying again to escape the hold they had on me. Genesis turned his eyes to me.

"You were a test subject in Hojo's new experiment," he explained, as though I didn't already know. "A modified version of Jenova's power runs through you."

"What? Seriously?" I widened my eyes. Jenova? Wasn't that Sephiroth's mother? _That_ was something I didn't already know. Genesis said nothing, but made a gesture I didn't understand. Then, the copy to my left raised the clump of hair to his mouth and began to swallow it. "No way..." I said, not knowing whether to be afraid or sick, "he just ate my hair!"

"Your cells will be my gift of the goddess..." Genesis explained, outstretching his arms. "The degradation will cease." I felt my strength come back after having relaxed my muscles, and yanked myself free from the copies. They didn't make any attempt to stop me, however, so I stayed alert just in case.

"You... are twisted," I said, and he simply stared at me for a moment.

"The monster has been harvested, and can be discarded." Genesis' eyes stayed on me, but he spoke to the copies. He was calling me a monster now, huh?

"You're the monster!" I said, clenching my teeth. Genesis lowered his head, but raised the apple again.

"Legend shall speak of sacrifice at world's end," he said, turning and walking away from me. I gripped my sword tighter in my hand and started to follow him as he spoke. "The wind sails over the water's surface, quietly, but surely." Before I got close enough to do anything, Genesis beat his wing a single time and took off into the sky. I watched him disappear, and then I heard another sound of a wing behind me. Only one sound. I looked over my shoulder to check on the other copy, and his hands were clasped around his throat. Turning to face him, I watched as the man yelled in pain in several voices, and fell to his knees. He stayed there for a moment, but I felt myself gasp as a green aura formed itself around his body. Then, there was an explosion of yellow and green, through which I could see vague shapes, twisting and changing into something new.

The colors faded and I watched in horror as something came forth. The Genesis copy was there, but he was suspended from the ground now on some sort of mixture of wings and arms. At the end of each arm was a hand of metallic talons that he scratched along the ground while raising his body to a new height. I took a few steps back, readying my sword, and the monster slammed it claws down on the pavement so hard that it felt like the ground shook. Drawing a sword with his human arms, the copy let out a monstrous scream and came dashing at me.

I dodged his sword, then barely dodged his talons. I thought I heard the air rip as the tips just missed the side of my head. Rolling backward to make some distance, I was hit was a fireball and knocked to me stomach. For a moment, I couldn't tell whether or not I'd caught fire, because it felt like I did, but luckily that wasn't the case. Groaning, I pushed myself back to my feet only to be thrown against the side of the bridge, where the monster followed me and pinned me to attack with his sword. I blocked with the Buster and the thing roared again. Up close, I could see that even the more human part of the body was now covered in hideous scales, and the teeth were sharpened to points.

Struggling to hold my deadlock with the monster, I managed to grasp a materia from my pocket. I really should have kept those in more convenient places for a fight. Holding the stone up, I noticed that it wasn't the ice one I'd been using, but it would do. Lightning burst forth in the copy's face, and it staggered back in pain. I didn't wait even a moment for its relentless assault to come back, and ran at it, striking numerous times with my blade. The monster twisted and roared, throwing a clawed hand up on my chest, but I hit it in the face with another lightning bolt before it could do anything. With one quick maneuver, I struck its talons away and turned the sharp edge to the creatures neck. I knew that was the killing blow, because the painful roaring stopped and it fell face-first on the ground. I watched its body twitch a few times, and the green aura came back, except this time it looked like it was evaporating off of the body instead of powering it.

What the hell happened to that thing? Was that kind of mutation really just from... eating my cells? I flipped my sword back onto my back and turned away, walking over to Cloud. I looked back at the thing again before getting on the motorcycle, and then hung my head.

"Angeal..." I said quietly. "What do I do?" I threw my leg back up over the motorcycle and felt the engine buzzing beneath me. I knew it was unfair to be asking Angeal for advice. He probably couldn't hear me, but even if he could, I couldn't always be his problem. Then again, maybe I wasn't a problem. I was taking care of Cloud, but I didn't see _him_ as being a problem. Actually, I was really grateful to have someone there with me. Otherwise, it would have been so lonely. Angeal must have been so lonely. I looked at Cloud, wishing that _he_ could help me figure out what to do next. "Tell me..." I pleaded, but Cloud was silent.

The motorcycle revved again, and I went back to driving, passed the copy's body, away from that place, away from that fight, and off to my fate.


	40. A SOLDIER's Betrayal Part 10

**Cloud**

I was having one of those times where I wasn't sure what was happening even in the slightest, but I felt more aware than usual. I found myself standing, back against the cold metal of the reactor, sweeping away the Coral dust with my feet, and thinking about what I'd write next in my journal. I wasn't _really_ thinking though. It was strange, because I remembered that day; I remembered what I wrote in my journal, and what I said to the guys, and what I found in the mobile home, but there was something in me that didn't accept it, like it never happened. Not yet. The feeling was sort of like I was passing through time, or it was passing through me in a very strange way. None of it made sense. All I knew was that I was in a bad state. Somewhere, not in Coral, not kicking up dust, I was in a bad state, and I had a feeling that Zack was too.

Another infantryman arrived about five minutes after I found myself at that post, just as I knew he would. As he relieved me of my shift, his voice fought against my awareness, and I felt less like I knew what would happen next. I knew where I would go, however, either by memory or some plan that I'd made on that day. The others from mobile home four and I had arranged to meet each other near the entrance to the reactor. Not for any particular reason, except for maybe chatting on the walk back to our rooms and hoping that something exciting happened to _somebody_.

I'd been stationed practically in-between the other guys, so they approached me from both sides shortly after I came to the meeting point. I heard an exaggerated yawn come from one of the men as he stretched his arms out so far that I thought they'd pop off. I figured he was trying to emphasize the point that _nothing_ had, in fact, happened to cause any excitement for him during his shift. Despite this, a large-bodied friend of mine was the first to speak up with the question.

"Sooo..." he stretched the o sound until he walked in close enough to continue. "Anyone got any good, action-packed tales of heroism, tragedy or destruction to share today?" I thought that those words would actually make people _less_ likely to answer.

"Oh yeah," replied the man that I hadn't yet learned the name of. "I thought I might have seen a spider."

"Dry as always..." added the yawning man, and I nodded in agreement. I figured he'd gotten the point.

"What about you?" The question was turned on me. Apparently he hadn't gotten the point.

"Nothing yet..." I shrugged, starting us off walking in the direction of the home. "How about we make ourselves a good story now?" It wasn't really in my character to suggest such a thing, especially when I wasn't all that sure what I meant. The big man seemed confused as well.

"Make ourselves one?" he repeated, tilting his head as he walked.

"Like role-play?" Another man laughed beside me.

"No, but let's not just go to sleep immediately," I said, attempting to clarify. "I mean, we probably won't be here much longer, so I figured we'd enjoy ourselves instead of..."

"Just another day of guard duty?" He finished my sentence. "Yeah, that would be nice."

"At least we're stationed out here and not inside the reactor, right?" The man next to me shrugged, taking a breath of the fresh air. The big guy nodded.

"Tch, yeah..." he agreed, walking up closer to me. "Those places smell weird. So what do we do for fun around here?" That part was directed at me again.

"We could start by getting something to eat." I gestured at the home, just then remembering where we were. "All that fighting made me hungry." The big guy laughed and threw open the door to the mobile home.

As usual, the four other men discarded their helmets where they stood, or in random corners, and as usual, I was the only one to set mine down in a proper spot with some care. I supposed the others probably thought I was a neat freak or something, and perhaps I _did_ take care of my things a little bit better than them, but they had probably never experienced having their helmet broken and being punished by the captains for weeks over it. _That_ was not something I wanted to relive.

The idea of reliving brought back some of the awareness that I'd done this all before. Whether it made sense or not, I actually became too aware that I knew what would happen next to not get startled when it happened. The door to my own room creaked open before me, and there was SOLDIER first class, Zack Fair, reading my journal. I had been about to set my helmet down in my room, but instead I simply froze in place. Then, without a second thought, I stiffened into an upright stance more befitting of an infantryman.

"S-sir," I said, at attention, my eyes drifting to the open journal by his hands, "Were you...?"

"I came to apologize." He grasped for a reason and stood up from the chair.

"Sir... for reading my journal?" I asked, going over possible reasons in my head. He seemed to be considering something as well.

"Uh, yeah. And you don't have to call me sir," he said, looking and sounding a bit less like a superior officer by the minute. I took that as a sign that I could loosen up a bit.

"It's okay," I responded. I wasn't about to call out a first class on what was wrong and right. I set my helmet down on the nightstand, and took a seat on the bed. He was still sitting in the only chair. "You didn't read too much, did you?" I asked, still feeling strangely nervous despite being so aware.

The next few minutes faded by without my notice. I wasn't sure whether I'd been thinking too much about where I should have actually been at that time, or whether I had simply skimmed through that part in my memory like a book. I found myself writing in my journal. I was writing what I knew I would write, what I was wondering about earlier that day.

_X day/X month/X year – Time: ?:?pm_

_ Zack Fair was here today. I found him inside my room in the mobile home, just after coming back from guard duty. He was reading these journals. It was strange, yes, stranger than anything I had expected to see today, but it turned out well. He stayed for a few minutes and talked with me. I didn't really talk as well as I could have, because I guess I felt a little bit out of my comfort zone with the surprise visit, but he ended it all by saying that it would be nice to catch up sometime. This is a good sign. Maybe, if he of all people really noticed me, the idea of getting into SOLDIER isn't as far off as I've been thinking..._

It was on day six at Nibelheim that I realized exactly how close SOLDIER was. We were bound to be on one of our last days on that mission, and Zack said he'd recommend me as soon as we got back to the Shinra building. It was sort of a nervous thought, but at the same time I knew that there would be very little chance that the company would turn down a recommendation that came from one of their only two first classes.

I had just finished lunch with Zack when he told me he was going to go check up on Sephiroth again. He joked about dragging him out of the basement if it came to that but I could tell that he was uneasy. The entire town seemed to be uneasy, and I knew that couldn't have helped. Apparently, the word was starting to get around that something strange had happened up at the reactor, and that Sephiroth had been locked away under that Manor since. I was using the uneasiness an an excuse to wear my helmet, telling Zack that I thought it made the people more comfortable to see that I was on duty, but the truth was that I was still nervous to let Tifa see me. Her father was probably right. I'd probably only have brought her harm if I came back into her life. It brought me down at first, but I was learning to live with the fact that she was moving on, and as long as she was happy, I was.

Later that day, Zack came back empty handed, and I knew he needed to take his mind off of Sephiroth. I needed to take my mind off of Tifa, and mostly off of her father. So as we walked back to the inn and I found a moment of silence, I turned to look at him.

"Hey," I started, just to get his attention. It was clear I broke him from thought, but he responded with a smile. "Let's go sit on the well tonight." So we did.

As the sun was setting, I took a seat on the wooden edge of Nibelheim's well, and Zack sat next to me. It was the first time I had sat there since I was a kid. Well, truthfully it had only been about three years since that night with Tifa, when I said goodbye to her and my old life, but it felt like so much longer. I'd grown so much during my time with Shinra, and there were so many times that I thought I'd made the wrong choice leaving home in the first place. Over the years, SOLDIER had only seemed further and further away, and I only felt more stuck in place as the months flew by. Then, Zack came along, first at Modeoheim when he gave me the realization that SOLDIERs and infantrymen _could_ talk to each other. Then, months later, he showed up at Coral, and that's where my life started to change. Zack took the time to speak with me, and he brought me on a mission to Gold Saucer. I realized that no matter how different we seemed, we were still so similar. Of course I couldn't fight like Zack then. I couldn't fight like Zack when he sparred with me at Nibelheim either. He said he was tired afterward, but I knew he could have done that all day. No, I couldn't fight like Zack, but I was driven, and even though I had been driven for years before, I never really noticed until Zack showed me. Now, I was going to be a SOLDIER, finally.

I blinked my eyes and focus came back to me. Turning my head to Zack, I could see he was in thought as well, but he looked more relaxed than he had earlier that day. I planned on talking to him there, on that well. I wasn't really sure what I wanted to say, but I wanted to make him feel better. I wanted to know exactly what he was thinking, about SOLDIER, about the reactor, about Sephiroth, about everything. I wanted to ease his mind the same way he'd done so many times for me, even if he hadn't realized he was doing _anything_. This was good too, though. Despite the silence, Zack was smiling. I sort of wished he would look at me, which was odd since before recently I generally preferred to _avoid_ attention, but he just continued to stare at the ground. At least he was smiling.

We sat there as the sun set before us, and into the blue glow of night that came from the mountains. At some point, my hand found his, or his found mine, and we took hold of each other. It was like that, together at night just the two of us, that I felt safe, and that I felt strong like a SOLDIER.

Awareness took me again, and I wasn't in Nibelheim anymore. Everything was mostly dark, and I could hear the faint sound of a motorcycle. It didn't really matter where I was anymore. I couldn't remember exactly what happened in Nibelheim at that moment, nor what happened afterward. I didn't really know what kind of state I was in, but it didn't matter. Like that night on the well, I knew Zack was there with me. Even if he wasn't looking at me, even if he wasn't saying anything, I felt safe and I felt strong. I didn't care if it made no sense. I was a SOLDIER, and I would remain strong.


	41. A SOLDIER's Promise Part 1

**A Heart For My Nobody says:**

**Hey all! Only four days since the last update, but since the Cloud chapters have been taking a slower road, I wanted to hurry some Zack and some plot your way to keep things going! More or less, the jumbled flashbacks in Clouds mind will be taking a bit more shape in the upcoming chapters, so hopefully that'll catch your interest, but for now please enjoy some Zack! I'll keep the updates coming!

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**Zack**

My eyes blinked open as the sun crept into the mountain pass. I'd found a small, shaded section among the rocks where Cloud and I slept the night, and it seemed that Shinra was still unaware of our location. I pushed myself up from the ground, eying the area for troops or monsters. Knowing Shinra, they were probably sending more squads by the hour to find us. Finding no imminent threat, I walked over to the motorcycle near Cloud, and started dusting it off with the back of my glove.

"Good morning," I responded to a small noise he made. He seemed to be making more sounds lately. I chose to assume that was a good sign. The motorcycle started with a turn of the key, and I hoisted Cloud back up into the side seat.

As we rode a ways down the mountain pass, kicking dust up behind us, I couldn't help but wonder where we were, exactly. I'd kept track for a while, but it was difficult to tell how far we'd gone with all the twists and turns among all the rocks. All I hoped was that we were at least still moving _away _from Nibelheim. It could only be so long until the army caught up to us, so the last thing we needed was to drive the wrong way.

Finally, I found a path that seemed to take us up a bit higher in hopes that we might get to a good vantage point. When I slowed the motorcycle to a stop, not only did I get a good view, but an interesting surprise as well.

"Huh...?" I said, dismounting the bike and staring off at the forested village before us. "Huh! Cloud, this is my hometown!" I yelled back to him, and then stretched my arms open wide as if to embrace the whole place. "This is Gongaga!"

A few minutes later, we arrived in the outskirts of town, near a broken reactor. I heard a beep come from my phone as I stopped the engines on the motorcycle, and leaned back in my seat to flip it open.

"It's from Kunsel again," I said, glancing at Cloud.

_Subject: Just as I thought – From: Kunsel_

_ I hear two research samples have escaped from Nibelheim. And might you be one of them, _

_ Zack? If you are, watch your back, because now a whole battalion of infantrymen has been _

_ called in. They're coming after you in crazy numbers. Man, what in the hell did you do to _

_ deserve this? I don't care if you've made an enemy out of Shinra. I'll always be waiting for you _

_ to come back. Just make it back alive, buddy. Promise me._

"He's worried about me," I said, shutting the phone. "At least it sounds like _I'm_ the priority." I stepped off the vehicle and turned to Cloud, just to make sure I hadn't made him feel unimportant. "It's a good thing." I paced a few steps forward, and then a few back, and turned on my heel to find myself in the same place I started. I had a lot on my mind.

"A whole battalion, huh?" I said aloud, crossing my arms. "I bet my parents are worried about me too... or at least my mom. I should..." I stopped talking to consider how little sense it would make to go into town. "No, I can't go to my house... I'd probably walk right into an ambush." I felt frustrated the more I though about it. It had been so long since I'd been home.

"Wait here a minute," I said finally, turning my head back to Cloud. I took a few more steps toward the town and stopped, considering one final time. "I'm just worried about my parents." I straightened myself out, trying not to think too hard about the possibilities. "I wonder if Mom's all right... it's risky, but should I go back to town?"

I couldn't just run away from that. Especially after what happened in Nibelheim, I couldn't just go on without making sure my parents were safe. So risky or not, I set out through the dusty, broken wreckage of the old reactor, through the all-too-familiar forest paths, and ended up at the entrance of the town. I stopped, staring at it, remembering my childhood, and with one deep breath I walked again, but just before I went inside, I was interrupted.

"Behind you!" I heard Cissnei's voice and spun around to face her. She had her arms crossed and a smile on her face. "So predictable… Couldn't you guess your hometown would be the first place we'd look?"

"Humph…" I couldn't really argue her point, but I hated how smug she was about it.

"Here to see your parents?"

"Yeah, so?" I asked, hands on my hips. "What's wrong with that?"

"I see," she said, taking a few casual steps toward me. I wasn't sure whether I needed to be ready to defend myself or not.

"Yeah, well… I guess you're right," I admitted, letting my arms drop to my sides. "It was pretty careless." She just stared at me and I let my eyes drift off as I turned away, testing her loyalty again. "We'll be going." I started to walk and I heard her say something behind me.

"Be careful." I slowed down to a stop as she continued. "Security is very tight right now. Apparently… another target is in the area." I turned around again.

"Who?" I asked, trying to read her face. Cissnei wasn't as good at hiding things as the other Turks were. She looked more serious before responding.

"Angeal." I couldn't even gasp at the name. It was astonishing, but at the same time I felt like I almost knew. I took a few steps to the side, processing the news.

"I see…"

"I see?" she echoed, her eyebrows raised. "He died by your hand. You're not surprised?"

"I think he may have helped us," I said, not looking at her, "escape Shinra Manor."

"Interesting," she responded after a moment, and I heard her walking again. "The sighting reports were true."

"But why would he come to a place like Gongaga?" I wondered aloud as Cissnei walked up next to me.

"He came here to see you," she explained. "What other reason could there be?" I remembered how she said the security was tight, and I knew I couldn't let my old mentor get caught trying to look after me. I turned around and stepped away from Cissnei.

"Run away if you can, Angeal!" I shouted into the forested outskirts. "The Turks are watching!"

"I'll give you ten minutes," Cissnei said, probably not too happy about my warning call. "After that… I return to the Turks."

"Return?" I questioned, and she remained silent for a moment.

"Right now, I'm not in the mood…" She turned away, crossing her arms again. "I can't bring bad news to your parents."

I thought about my parents, and about how long it had been since I left. I was so young and careless back then. I sort of missed that. All I could do was shift in place and try to avoid getting emotional in front of a Turk. Finally, I looked back up at her.

"My mom…" I started, thinking about my words. "How is she?"

"She's worried," Cissnei responded, facing me again. "She thinks after all this, you won't be able to find a wife."

"What's up with that?" I said in embarrassment, turning away again.

"They're nice people, and they're doing fine." She really wasn't like the other Turks, Cissnei. She really cared; I could tell by her voice. As much as she might have liked to hide it, I could tell. It sort of made me wish that we were talking on different terms, without the awkwardness of being on enemy sides, if you could call Cloud and I a side.

"Good," I said after a moment, and raised my chin. "That's all I need to know."

"Yeah..." she agreed after another silence. She was quiet, but she sounded content as I was. I turned back around to face her, and caught her eyes for a moment as she pretended she wasn't looking at me.

"How's your folks?" I asked, expecting the question to catch her off guard. She simply stared, then took a few more casual steps as she spoke up.

"I was raised inside Shinra," she answered plainly, catching _me_ off guard instead. The awkwardness doubled with that, and I wished I could have retracted the question. One hand scratching the back of my neck, I considered my next words, and then it came to me.

"Hey, Cissnei..." I started, and she looked up at me. "Would you mind... keeping my folks company for a while?" She lowered her head in consideration, and I was ready to hear one of those standard 'not part of the job' Turk lines, but then her eyes met mine again and she was smiling.

"All right," she agreed, and it looked like she was trying to stay cool. "No problem."

"They'll probably ask you to join the family," I said jokingly. Cissnei smirked.

"Already happened." I jumped a little as she started to walk off.

"What did you say?" I stuttered, but she just kept walking. "Cissnei!"

"Not my real name," she said back to me. "You have five minutes left!" She had to regain that Turk attitude eventually, I supposed. A few seconds later, she'd walked out of sight, and as I turned to leave the area, something new caught my eye. I saw a single white wing a short distance away, behind a rock and some trees.

"Angeal?" I called in disbelief. "Angeal! It is you!" In hindsight, I realized that I probably shouldn't have shouted that out, and he took off, flying into a mountain pass. "Hey, wait!" I yelled after him, but he was gone again. I thought about how I should return to Cloud, but I probably wouldn't get a chance like that again for a while. "Is it really Angeal...?" I thought, lowering my head. "Only one way to know for sure."

I ran right after him, out of the town and into the mountain pass. The whole place was pretty familiar to me. Even though there were monsters, I ended up exploring just about all of Gongaga as a child. The only place I didn't really know too well was the reactor, and I'd even been _there_ a few times. It must have drove my parents crazy, I thought; me showing up with new cuts and bruises all the time. It was no wonder that I ended up joining SOLDIER. Thinking about my parents again, I really hoped that Cissnei would make them happy for a while, especially if the worst was to happen to me.

After my running, I found Angeal at the edge of a cliff, staring off the side. Apparently, he'd gotten rid of his SOLDIER uniform and was wearing gray. In fact, he was looking very gray himself, and I hoped that the degradation process hadn't gotten to him too badly. As I approached him, he flew off again.

"Wait!" I yelled and threw my arm out, somewhat out of breath. As he left, two other people lowered down through the air and landed in front of me. They were Genesis copies, one with a scythe like I fought in front of the Nibelheim reactor, and one with a large bladed gun that more closely resembled Genesis himself. "What is this!" I sputtered, drawing my weapon.

"S... cells..." the copies groaned in a dreadful unison. What the hell were they talking about?

"I don't have any S cells!" I yelled in frustration, running and swinging my blade at them. The sword grazed the scythe wielder, but the other copy ducked under the blow like it was nothing. I turned to that one next, taking the lightning materia in my hand and sending a blast his direction. With a raise of his gunblade, he let the sparks fly around him without even a flinch.

From behind me, I heard a swinging noise, and dove just in time to avoid being reaped by the monstrous copy's scythe. Immediately as I stood back on my feet, I was forced to dodge an explosive bullet from the gunblade, and when I ran to the side, I felt a gravity attack push me to the ground. Luckily, I managed to shake off the effects and send another burst of lightning toward both of them. I followed the blast up by dashing at them again. Ducking under a sword attack, I managed to land a powerful blow on the monstrous copy's stomach, sending it flying off the nearby cliff. Then, I turned around just in time to block a speedy combo from the other one.

I exchanged blows left and right with the remaining Genesis clone, and it definitely seemed stronger than the others so far. Every time I thought I may have beaten it, it got back up to fight again. Then, out of nowhere, I was hit it the back by a scythe's blade. The copy had returned from being knocked off the cliff. I managed to move my body with the attack so that it didn't do too much damage, but I was thrown to my knees nonetheless.

Slowly standing back to my feet, I took out another materia. It was a red one: a summon materia. I hadn't used it for a while, but I figured that now was a good time. Holding it above me, I felt the air turning hot around me. I stepped back, and the ground under the copies was engulfed in flame. Ifrit, the fire summon, burst out of the earth, throwing it's arms open in a monstrous inferno. With a single fiery roar, the summon charged at the clones, and they didn't even have a chance to react before they were incinerated in the hellfire. For a moment, it got too bright for me to watch, but when my eyes returned to the spot where the clones were, there was nothing but empty air. The embers left on the ground faded away. Summon materia had a habit of leaving no evidence behind. None of the ground was scorched or burning, the air returned to the proper temperature, and there wasn't even a mark where Ifrit had burst from the earth. The only difference was, there were no more copies... until a moment later. Two more scythe wielding copies lowered down to the spot that their predecessors once stood.

"S... cells..." they chanted together.

"You've got to be kidding me..." I said, looking between the two of them and stepping back. They matched my steps, advancing on me, still chanting.

"His cells are completely useless!" a new voice said behind me. I could recognize the speaker, but I couldn't quite place it. Then I turned around with a gasp. It was professor Hollander, the scientist who betrayed Shinra to help Genesis! He was lowering down from the air, just like one of the clones, with one tiny black wing on his left shoulder, and all over him was the evidence of degradation. Genesis lowered by his side. "You are a former member of SOLDIER," Hollander said, pointing at me. "Your cellular structure has already mutated."

"Hollander!" I questioned, staring at his scarring skin. "You did it... to yourself?"

"Yes, after nearly being killed by Genesis. It was really all I could do to survive." He laughed, as though some part of that could possibly be amusing. "I merely borrowed some cells from Genesis..."

"You know, you're... degrading." I gestured to the wing on his back as a feather fell from it. He sighed.

"Indeed, but there is still some hope..." I didn't like the way he sounded when he said that, and I could still hear the copies behind me, chanting about S cells. As though reacting to some hidden cue, Genesis stepped forward, holding a Banora apple up in front of him.

"The gift of the goddess..." Genesis said, turning his eyes to me. "A pure S cell sample will stop the degradation process." Hollander nodded a single time in agreement.

"Pure?" I questioned, my brain quickly considering his wording.

"There are... two of you, on the run," he said, his expression turning serious.

"Uh... no," I said, stepping back. How could they have known about Cloud? It didn't make any sense. If Genesis had known about the experiments, then why didn't he attack us then?

"One is a former SOLDIER operative," he continued, lowering the Banora White. "The other, an infantryman."

"That infantryman carries within his body the last pure S cells in the world!" Hollander added, clenching his fist shut. With a jerk, he and the two copies behind me sprang into the air and flew off toward the reactor.

"Hey!" I yelled, running to stop him, but Genesis threw his arm up in my path. I stopped short, gritting my teeth at him.

"Do you know the verse in Act Four that leads in to the final act?" he asked, barely glancing at me.

"Of course not!" I said, turning my head away. I wished that for once he would stop rambling about that damn poem.

"Legend shall speak of sacrifice at world's end," he recited, waving his hand around with the words. He preceded to walk past me, and I took a few steps, deciding whether to run off or to shut him up. "The wind sails over the water's surface. Quietly, but surely."

"Enough about sacrifices and endings!" I said, tensing up and turning to him. "I don't want to hear it!"

"You don't understand the beauty of these words." He sighed, shaking his head. "How tragic..." He started to pace past me again with a smirk on his face. "I'm not surprised. Even I didn't understand all of it." He stopped again, turning his head to the sky. "The greatest mystery behind the gift of the goddess... The water's surface. And the answer I have arrived at, is the lifestream."

"What?" I asked, stepping over to him. The lifestream was supposed to be some force of life or power, circling the planet. What did _that_ have to do with some poem?

"There are various theories regarding the missing final act. However, only my theory is correct." Genesis smiled slowly and held the apple out one last time in my direction. "And I will prove it to you!"

"No, that won't be necessary!" I said with a swing of my wrist. I'd had enough; enough LOVELESS, enough of that apple, and enough waiting. I jumped at Genesis, but he was too quick for me. I landed stomach first in the dirt by the cliff. Feeling something in my hand, I noticed that I had caught the Banora White. I spun around to search for Genesis, pushing myself to my feet, but he was gone, and all that was left was a few falling black feathers. Then, I heard his voice again. I couldn't tell from where, but what I heard was clear.

"You will understand."


	42. A SOLDIER's Promise Part 2

**A Heart For My Nobody says: **

**Hey guys, just a note! For those of you who didn't know, many users on had been experiencing Error type 2 when attempting to update their stories. Unfortunately, I was one of these people. I didn't forget you guys, and I plan to keep the updates coming at the same pace they were before! Sorry that I wasn't able to in the meantime. Anyway, it's fixed now, and I hope you guys will enjoy these upcoming chapters as we get into the heavier plot!**

* * *

**Cloud**

And then I left; the child who went to join SOLDIER.

No, before that...

I remembered that night often. I climbed up the well to meet her, and just sat there as promised. I was so worried that I'd make her wait, so I got there about forty minutes early. I didn't remember why I was wearing shorts, but I was. A thirteen-year-old boy, mostly skin and bone, not too much muscle, sitting out in the dark in his shorts. She ended up being about twenty minutes late. It was so cold, and I thought she would never come. Most of the kids from the town wouldn't have come if I'd asked them to. Nobody really cared too much about me, other than my mom, so it was hard to believe that Tifa did, but I cared about _her_, and that was the difference for me.

I sighed and shifted against the chilly wood of the well on my back. I hadn't climbed all the way up because I figured it was too dangerous in the dark, so I sat on the ledge that surrounded it about halfway up. I rubbed above my knees a few times, trying to work away some of the goosebumps, and pulled the green fabric of the shorts over them. It didn't really help. I was so cold, but I couldn't get up and leave. That was too important to walk away from. I shifted again and jumped a little when I heard the sound of someone climbing the wood on the other side. After some quiet scuffing noises, Tifa peeked out from around the back of the well.

"Sorry I'm late," she whispered, and she _did_ sound sorry. I figured that her father probably made it hard for her to sneak out of the house, or maybe she had dinner a little late. It was odd, but despite how much I'd thought about what I was going to say and how I'd say it, I hadn't put any consideration into what I'd say _first_. After a moment, I realized I should have been talking, but that only made me feel more awkward. Tifa stepped around the corner on the ledge and took a seat next to me, resting her hands down on the wood, and I kicked my feet a few times, still trying to get myself to speak. "You said you wanted to talk to me about something?"

"Come this spring..." I said, starting a little quietly, "I'm leaving this town for Midgar." Tifa stayed silent for a few seconds.

"All the boys are leaving town," she said, gently swinging her leg as she spoke. I looked over at her for the first time since she'd arrived, and I noticed that she was dressed up. She was wearing a light blue dress and matching heels, and the light from the mountain was reflecting off her. It just made me feel worse about wearing shorts. I shook my head and felt my ponytail brush against the well.

"But I'm different from all of them. I'm not just going to find a job." I said, standing up on the ledge and turning to her. "I want to join SOLDIER." I held my arms out to try and convey how big that was, but she only glanced at me. I turned again to stare off the side at the stars. "I'm going to be the best there is, just like Sephiroth!"

"Sephiroth..." Tifa said slowly as though sounding out the name. "The Great Sephiroth." She still wasn't looking at me, and I sort of wished she would. I paused, watching her, and then walked around the back of the well.

Joining SOLDIER was huge, I thought. I wished there was some way I could have told Tifa how huge it was. I looked up at the back of the well, eying the top where I hadn't dared to climb. If I was going to be in SOLDIER, I couldn't be afraid to climb up a well. I reached and slowly pulled myself to the top. As I threw up my leg and hoisted the the other one, I continued to watch the water slosh around inside. I wondered how cold that would be if I fell in, but I didn't fall in. That was one obstacle defeated, I thought. Then I stood up so that I could look down at Tifa.

"Isn't it hard to join SOLDIER?" she asked, pulling one knee in closer to her. There was something in her voice that I couldn't really understand, but I had a feeling that wasn't really the question she wanted to ask.

"I probably won't be able to come back home for a while." There was a silence, and then I heard her make a little noise. She didn't say anything else, and I started to worry. "Huh?" I said, trying to get a response. She was silent again for a little bit.

"Will you be in the newspapers if you do well?" she asked, finally. I nodded with a smile, thinking about being in the papers.

"I'll try." I heard her shift as she turned her head to look up at the well.

"Hey," she said, louder than she'd been that whole time, or at least with more energy. "Why don't we make a promise?" I didn't answer her. To be honest, I'd gotten rather caught up in childish thoughts of fame and being a hero, and when she mentioned promises, my mind went blank. "Um... if you get really famous and I'm ever in a bind..." she started, leaning back against the wood. "You come save me, all right?"

"What?" I asked, but I thought I heard her correctly. I never really considered being a SOLDIER and seeing Tifa apart from my goodbye that night, and maybe when I would come home as a hero. She started kicking her feet again.

"Whenever I'm in trouble, my hero will come and rescue me," she said, sounding slightly embarrassed. "I want to at least experience that once."

"What?" I asked again, feeling like an idiot and taking a seat atop the well. Tifa leaned back in frustration, pulling her knee in again.

"Come on!" she said, staring up at me. "Promise me!" I stared down at her and into her eyes. She never really realized, I don't think, that I was joining SOLDIER for her in the first place.

"All right." I nodded, relaxing my shoulders. "I promise." I nodded again to make the words final in my head.

Later that night, just before Tifa and I left each other, we saw a shooting star. It was one of those things you'd call cheesy or predictable in a play, but when it happened then, it was like a dream. It was almost a perfect night. If it wasn't about me leaving, it probably would've been perfect, but I _was_ leaving. Tifa and I slept there, despite the cold. We didn't really care, because it was nice, but it had to be over eventually. The sun came up the next day, I woke up first, and then I left; the child who went to join SOLDIER. I was sure, as I walked down the dirt road away from town, that was what they would call me. Tifa would tell everyone that I left to go join SOLDIER. Of course, my mom already knew I was leaving, and the others wouldn't care too much. It would give them something to talk about for a little while, but then they'd forget about me. Tifa's father would probably say it was for the best.

My mother had given me as much travel money as she could spare and as many essentials as I could carry, but other than that, traveling to Midgar was up to me. I took a small ferry across the water, and paid someone to drive me once I reached the other side. I was sick pretty much the whole way. When I finally got to Midgar, however, I had a second wind. The city was huge and looked none to friendly, especially to someone coming from a farm town like I was, but it didn't matter to me whether I knew my way around or not. The building I was trying to get to was easily the largest building in Midgar, and it was placed right in the center of it: the Shinra Building.

I took a train, I didn't remember from what sector, and walked the rest of the distance to the center of Midgar. Just outside the building, I was stopped by a guard that was stationed out there.

"Can I help you with something, kid?" the infantryman said, raising one hand in front of me.

"Aren't people aloud to just... walk in?" I asked, taking note of a woman he let pass me by.

"The Shinra Electric Power Company isn't just for walking around in," he said, crossing his arms. "Where's your parents?"

"I'd like to sign up," I said, not too happy with his tone. He raised an eyebrow as I spoke.

"Seriously, kid. I'm not hear to play games with you." He shifted his hands to his hips.

"I'm here to sign up," I said firmly, and he stared at me for a long moment before speaking again.

"Don't let me stop you then." The infantryman stepped to the side, and I could hear him chuckle as I passed by. To me, that didn't say anything about the company, that said something about him. He was underestimating me because of my age, but if there was one thing that growing up in Nibelheim taught me, it was that I didn't fit my age.

The secretary up front treated me in a similar way, but rather than joking about me being too young, she thought I was joking when I said I wanted to get a job. I remembered telling her I wanted to be in SOLDIER and she laughed. Once I'd remembered her laugh, I couldn't remember what came after that. My mind was going blank again, and I was forcibly reminded that all that was in the past, and the present day came with so many new problems. I didn't know where I was, or if I was really there. I had some memory of Zack saying something to me, but I didn't know how long ago it was.

My eyes came into focus on a scientist standing before me. I felt like I recognized him, but I didn't know from where. He had a small black wing on the left side of his back, and the skin on his face looked like it was cracking.

"Cloud, run!" I heard Zack's voice call to me, but I couldn't move. I didn't even feel like I was in my body. I tried to move a leg or an arm, but nothing happened. I didn't even feel the strain of trying, as though my limbs were detached from me. The scientist was grinning, but all of a sudden something surprised him. Another man with a wing flew over, except his wing was white. I thought I recognized him too. Was it... Zack's mentor? The scientist clenched his fist and rushed at the man, and then my vision went blurry. A ringing came into my head, and my vision blurred more and more until everything was dark again. A heard a few more sounds, and then nothing else.


	43. A SOLDIER's Promise Part 3

**Zack**

Sprinting downhill on the dirt paths of Gongaga reminded me more of my childhood than anything else so far. I must have gotten more bruises from trying to beat my own running times as a kid than I had from fighting monsters in SOLDIER, though to be fair, it was hard to bruise once you were enhanced by Mako. Now that I _was_ in SOLDIER, I was obviously a lot faster than when I was little, but it still didn't feel fast enough. I could all but picture a little me jogging by without a care.

"Cloud's in danger! I gotta get back to the reactor!" I said, trying to speed up even further. "Run like you mean it, Zack!" I stumbled a little, stepping through some running water on my way, but managed to keep my footing and not lose too much momentum.

I felt the ground get rougher beneath me as I turned into the reactor site, and skidded to a stop. Hollander and the two monstrous Genesis copies had already made it to Cloud. Where was that tight security that Cissnei was talking about when I needed it? Of course, if security had made it to the reactor, I would've had a tough time recovering Cloud. I wasn't sure which would have been worse to deal with: these goons, or a squad of infantrymen. As Hollander approached the motorcycle, I noticed that Cloud's eyes were open.

"Cloud, run!" I said, swinging my arm. It was a stretch, but I hoped that maybe a dangerous situation would help him wake up. He didn't move, however, and I had no time to wait for him. As I started to run, I felt something speed by me in the air. Angeal had swooped in, ramming himself into the two copies. Once his feet touched the ground, he ducked an attack from a scythe and shoved the attacker away. He was attacked again by the other one, and just managed to back-step away from it, but was too distracted to notice Hollander coming at him. A single strike from the scientist had Angeal on the ground, and I knew I had to move in and help. I was a little worried after seeing Angeal struggle in that fight. The degrading might have been getting to him more than I thought.

Angeal pushed himself back onto his feet, and I approached from the other side of the three attackers, ready for battle.

"Why, you...!" I said, catching Hollander's attention. He seemed to jump upon noticing me, and started to flee in another direction. I hesitated for a moment before pursuing him, but then decided that even if Angeal was degrading, he'd still be able to handle a couple of Genesis copies, and it was better to put my hopes on that than to let Hollander escape.

Hollander was running strangely, hunched over and constantly looking back as I chased him. He fled into a wide open area, still within eye-shot of Cloud and the others, and then turned around to face me, stumbling a bit as he did.

"Heh, heh, heh..." he said, weaving around. I couldn't tell whether he was laughing or coughing. Then, his hand shot up onto his forehead, his body contracting as though he was in pain. There was definitely something wrong with him. His skin looked like it was cracking even further from the degradation.

"Hollander!" I yelled, drawing my sword. He was just sneering at me and gripping a bag he had hanging from his side. "I'll do whatever I have to!"

"I have no need of you!" he growled, charging at me. I was ready to defend myself, but he surprised me at the last moment by veering off to the side. By the looks of it, I would have thought he just tripped, but he used the momentum to spin around and smack me in the back of the head with the bag. It didn't hurt too bad, but it did cause me to stagger forward, nearly loosing my footing.

When I turned around, one hand on my head, Hollander was shaking out his bag over the ground, and a bunch of weird, sticky capsules were spilling out all over the place. They were gross, but they didn't seem to be doing much, so I figured I'd be fine if I didn't step on any of them. Nevertheless, I wasn't about to let Hollander do whatever he was planning on doing with them. I ran to him again and he panicked as I approached, so he didn't have enough time to react before I hit him hard with the blunt side of the Buster Sword. The scientist went flying off to my right, and I took a moment to avoid stepping on any of the capsules.

I turned back to him, and he was drinking some strange liquid out of a beaker. I seriously couldn't take my eye off of him, I supposed. I'd thought the previous attack would have incapacitated him, since he was never tagged as much of a fighter, but apparently I was wrong. Dashing over to him, I used one arm to knock the beaker out of his hands, shattering it on the ground, and then hit him with the Buster again, this time with the blade. Immediately as he recovered from the attack, he drew another bottle from the bag and started to drink from it.

"Argh!" I yelled in frustration, running and slashing at him again.

"Stop!" he cried, stumbling back from the blow. I noticed that this time there was a strange green glow coming from the cut. I continued to pursue him and pinned him up against a wall of debris, my hand clasped around his throat.

"Why should I!" I asked, shoving my other arm against him to keep him in place. He struggled for a moment, but then a grin spread across his face. Hollander took a deep breath, and exhaled a cloud of yellowish green smoke that engulfed my head. My grip around him failed as I choked on the noxious gas, and I supposed he used a gravity attack, because the next thing I knew, I was being pressed against the ground by an unseen force.

The gases faded away, and I leaned my head back on the ground to find the source of a new noise. My sight was blurred at first, but when it focused I could see that the strange capsules had grown and were hatching into a bunch of worm-like monsters. Some of the hatched ones were already on there way to come and feast on me.

The effects of the gravity attack had worn off, but I waited until the first worm got close to roll onto my feet and cut the thing in half. The pieces of the worm fell to the sides and disintegrated. It was obvious that they weren't natural creatures. At least they didn't seem too tough, so the only problem would be the number of them. I was about to charge in and attack a few more of them, but Hollander jumped up from behind me and held me in place around my chest and shoulders. I struggled to get loose for a moment, and then I realized what he was doing as it was too late. He was holding me in place for the worms, which had started spraying a strange goo or webbing around my feet. I knocked Hollander off my back, but the worms had already started to swarm in around me.

"More! More!" Hollander laughed, throwing more capsules around on the ground.

"No!" I said, pulling a materia out of my pocket. "I've had enough!" Bolts of lightning shot everywhere, throwing the worms and disintegrating them in midair. As Hollander laughed and continued to spill the contents of his bag, I cut myself free from the webbing, ran right at him and dragged my blade up his back. He staggered forward and turned around. His expression was a strange mixture of fear and an insanity that I'd never seen in him. His arm moved for his bag and I ran at him again.

"Why won't you stop!" I yelled, swinging around my sword and cutting him numerous times. When I got hold of myself and stopped, Hollander stumbled back about ten feet. From every wound, the same green glow was pouring out. He attempted to take a few last steps towards me, but his legs gave out and he fell to the ground. He was still reaching for me as he went down. His existence seemed so troubled, I wondered if I was actually doing him a favor by defeating him. Thinking about this, I watched as his body faded away, consumed by the green glow.

I crushed and destroyed the remaining capsules, and then fell back to lean against the debris wall, holding my chest. With my other hand, I put away the Buster Sword and started feeling through a pouch I had with me. I recovered a small vial from the pouch, and with a sip, I felt the poisonous effects of the breath fading away. That had been one of the last remaining antidotes I'd gotten from the supplies back at Shinra. It was just a good thing I'd kept it with me. Feeling a lot better, I stretched out my arms and started walking back to Cloud and Angeal. It seemed the copies had been long gone, but Angeal was resting on the ground, looking a bit wiped out. He smiled as I approached.

"It's been a long time, Zack..." his eyes turned up to me, and he shifted to rest one arm on his knee. We both laughed, staring at each other. Just seeing Angeal again was like a dream. I didn't really know how to start, but we had so much catching up to do. I held the Banora White apple I had gotten from Genesis in my hand, tossing it up once. I'd kept it in the pouch with the antidote, and I figured it might make Angeal happy, him being from Banora and all.

"So what happened?" I mocked him a little. "That thing wasn't so tough!" I grinned, and Angeal smiled back, but there was something uneasy about it. He paused for a minute, and turned his eyes ahead.

"I can't fight like a first." He shrugged, turning his eyes back to me with the same uneasy smile. I was tossing the apple up and catching it, over and over, waiting for him to make a joke, but he didn't. He turned his eyes away again and spoke in several voices at once. "I'm just an Angeal copy." The apple landed heavy in my hand.

"Copy?" I said, freezing in place. He stood up slowly, staring into my eyes.

"It's Lazard." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Lazard, the old director of SOLDIER, went missing several months ago. Everyone thought he was dead, or a traitor.

"Lazard...?" I repeated, turning my head away in thought. "But... I thought you deserted to go join Genesis?" He shook his head, laughing.

"No, never!" he said, continuing to shake his head. "I could never join Genesis. He single-handedly destroyed the SOLDIER image while I was in command!" His expression turned more serious. "I left Shinra to fight Genesis. To destroy his army from the inside."

"I think I understand..." I said, pacing a little. "But, we caught Hollander right before you disappeared. If you didn't help him escape, who did?" There was a silence and he turned his eyes away from me again. His expression told me everything. "So, you're the one who helped Hollander out of Junon?" I questioned, stepping closer to him. "Why would you do such a thing?" He sighed and took a seat on the ground again.

"To exact my revenge, I needed Hollander." He lowered his head a bit as he talked.

"You really chose the wrong friends, didn't you?" I said, looking down at him. I didn't think it was necessary to hold Junon against him. I figured we'd all made mistakes with good intentions at some point or another.

"I agree," he shrugged, still not looking at me. "I never dreamed I'd be turned into an Angeal copy."

"Well, just be happy you're linked to Project G," I said, glancing at Cloud and remembering what Genesis said about S cells. Lazard was silent again, and then shifted a little to talk.

"It's a strange feeling..." he said, staring off ahead of him.

"Hm?" I looked down, and his expression was changed.

"The lust for vengeance that had so consumed my life is all but gone now." He raised his hand in front of his face, staring at it as he talked. "In its place... is a desire to help you, a desire to save Genesis..." he looked up at me to better convey his feelings, but soon turned his eyes away again in a deeper thought. "No, it's bigger than that. I..." he hesitated for a long moment. "I want to save the world."

I smiled, watching his fists shut and his eyes staring off as though they could see another world. It reminded me of someone. I would have thought it would make me a little uncomfortable, but it didn't. I was happy.

I walked forward, slowly, feeling the Banora apple in my hand. I remembered when _he_ told me about them. Said the townsfolk called them Dumbapples, because there was no consistency to when they'd appear during the year. I could still hear him saying it; Dumbapples. I reached up and grabbed the hilt of the Buster Sword, where Angeal's hand once grabbed it, and drew it out to my side.

"Nothing strange about that." I smiled back at him, over my shoulder. Then, I turned around and held the sword high for him to see. "Angeal lives inside you." He smiled and laughed softly, then looked down at the ground by his feet.

"Genesis is trying to obtain the _gift of the goddess_, but what is it, exactly?" he said, and I lowered my sword. I wasn't really sure how to answer him. Genesis had always been very cryptic, reciting his poems and expecting everyone to understand. "No, whatever it is, he must be stopped."

"I just don't understand what he's talking about at all," I said, putting the Buster Sword away. "What should I do?"

"Angeal may show us the way... perhaps," he considered, staring off into the sky.

"Maybe..." I nodded, slowly. "I hope so, Director."

"Heh, _Director_..." he laughed, then he looked up at me, resting his arms on his knees. "So, Zack, what is your dream?"

"Huh? Oh, let's see..." I put a hand to my chin as I thought, and then it came to me. "To become a hero!" I announced my answer with my hand proudly on my hip. It was the same answer that I gave Angeal a long time ago, and as I'd hoped, I received the same answer.

"Humph, unattainable dreams are the best kind." He smiled and I held my hand forward.

"Oh, come on! Lend me a hand!" I said, reaching a little further to urge him along. "You and Angeal both." He looked up at me, surprised as I stepped closer. "If we pull this off, we'll all be heroes!" I planted my hand on my chest with a smile. "At the very least, I'd feel like one!"

"So, Zack," he said after a pause, "where _is_ Genesis?" I thought about it, and then held the Banora White out in front of me. Banora was not only Angeal's hometown, but Genesis' as well.

"Oh!" I said, and held the fruit out to him.

"I see..." he said, considering the idea. It was then that I knew where we would end up next. The last time I went there, Shinra wiped the village off the face of the continent. It sort of felt like the place that everything started to go wrong, and maybe now it would be the place where everything was set right.

It was time to go back to Banora.


	44. A SOLDIER's Promise Part 4

**A Heart For My Nobody says:**

** Hey all! Sorry about the wait on the update, but this time it was because I've now written the longest chapter so far for this story: this one! I just want to say that reviews would be especially nice for this chapter, because it's the first bit of real long original content that you guys have gotten for a while in this story, and I want to know how you feel about it. I apologize that the original stuff hasn't been coming along too often, but I have to get some of the canon out of the way before I can get to the good stuff (not to say that I don't love Final Fantasy VII canon). Anyway, thanks to everyone for stickin' with me this long, and I hope you enjoy the chapter!**

* * *

**Cloud**

It was becoming harder to remember the more recent days of my life. My brain had become a scrambled mess of flashbacks and broken memories, and I had no way of knowing which ones were even real. I no longer remembered why I was in the state that I was. It sort of felt like I was trapped between life and death. I had an awareness of my thoughts, and occasionally I would even know what was going on around me, but my body wouldn't respond to anything, and I was beginning to feel more and more detached from it.

Nibelheim was falling further and further away in my mind. I knew that I went there on a mission with Zack and Sephiroth, and I knew that Tifa was still there. I knew that we went to the reactor, and I knew that something happened that was unexpected, something bad. I tried so hard to recall the events of the later days, but all I could come up with were bits and pieces, and they didn't tell me anything. The more I tried to remember, the more it seemed to fade away and get replaced by images from my younger days. At first, I could remember the Gold Saucer clearly, I could remember Coral, and Junon, and the snowy mountains of Modeoheim. Then, one by one, those memories became blurred, and even the first time Zack spoke to me was no longer clear enough for me to hear the words.

The more I tried to remember, the more I was taken back to the days when it all started, when I left my hometown, journeyed across the water and fields and ended up in the city of Midgar. I walked and rode through the city, stepped into the company building and told the lady at the desk that I wanted to join SOLDIER. I remembered how she laughed at me, and even more I remembered the looks she gave me when she realized that I wasn't joking; concerned looks, maybe terrified looks or sad ones. They were the kind of looks that you could gather someone's thoughts from. Like, a_re we really sending our children to war nowadays?_, or _How terrified will this boy be among the ranks, and will he even survive a day?_. I couldn't really blame anyone for that kind of thought, or at least not when it came to judging me over being thirteen years of age. The only thing that bothered me was that nobody ever seemed to realize the true reason I was joining: to become a hero.

That thought stuck with me for a while. Were people really so disenchanted with the world that they didn't even consider the idea of someone wanting to become a hero, or even to just help people out? Back then, all I wanted to do was to help the planet, and to help people. I wanted to be someone that children could look up to, like Sephiroth, someone with a voice to let them know that there was someone to help them, and to protect them. Some days I felt like I wanted to protect everybody, and some days I only wanted to protect Tifa, like I wanted to on the mountain.

I slept on these thoughts in a small rental room I found, anxious about the next day. The sun rose up in the sky, and I was already out and on my way to the SOLDIER entry level exams. When I arrived, the room I was taken to was already filled with potential recruits, and not a single person as young as I was. That made me nervous at first, but then I figured that being the youngest might work in my favor if I did well enough. People always said that Sephiroth was a member of SOLDIER ever since childhood. I hoped that we'd see Sephiroth, but I suspected that he didn't often spend his time talking to potentials.

About fifteen minutes later, the room went silent as we were greeted by Director Deusericus, given a speech about what SOLDIER stood for, and put to our first evaluation. At the time, joining the ranks of SOLDIER initially required two forms of evaluation: a written test to determine cleverness and IQ, and a physical test to make sure you wouldn't get torn up during your first assignment. As I expected, the written test wasn't too long, and most of the questions didn't necessarily have a correct answer. I figured they were looking for a certain type of quick thinking or problem solving, or maybe they would even use the personality they got off that test to determine what type of mission recruits would be best at. Whatever the case, we were all done with that test in a little over and hour and a half. Then came the hard part.

The Director brought us all up to the SOLDIER floor of the company building. It was all so surreal to me. Not only was that floor probably over forty stories higher than any building back home, and not only did it have the greatest technology I'd ever seen in my life, but that was the floor that I would be living on if I made it through those tests. That floor could have been my new home. The thought of that only made me more eager to prove myself as we followed Deusericus into the Simulation Training Room.

Two by two we filed, as directed, into the huge, metal simulation chamber. We all formed a line inside, not out of instruction, but out of a willingness to show our discipline. Had the others not done so, the thought probably never would have crossed my mind. I was still completely unfamiliar with any of that behavior, but it didn't matter to me. I was going to prove myself and become a hero. I felt a small nudge from the man standing next to me, and when I looked, I realized that it came from a boy that was closer to my age. He looked like he was still a few years older, but the boy was definitely closer to my age than anyone else, and I hadn't noticed him before.

"Exciting, huh?" he said with a grin, widening his blue eyes. I considered him for a moment, examining his black hair, spiky and unkempt, thinking about the tone of his voice and how thin he was. He didn't seem like someone who would be in SOLDIER at all, but then again, that was probably the same thing he thought about me, and the same thing that everyone had been thinking about me. That thought having crossed my mind, I felt an immediate kinship with him. Unfortunately, I also forgot to answer him.

"Alright, everyone," the Director spoke to us over an intercom in the room, and all of a sudden a simulation booted up and we found ourselves standing in the middle of a grassy mountain pass, rocky walls to three of our four sides. "We will be testing your physical abilities in a series of simulated environments, starting with this one: a simple obstacle course. These test are, as they say, where we separate the boys from the men." He paused long enough for me to feel irrationally targeted by his previous statement. "You may begin on your way through once you hear the sound of the bell. No purposefully injuring one another. The last two hopefuls to make it to the end are disqualified. Good luck!"

A small ding sounded off the rush of people through the first obstacle course. It was as the Directed said, and the first test was rather simple. There were a series of crawl spaces and things to climb, and a rope swing followed by a sprint at the end, but it was over in a short time, and I wasn't one of the last two to the finish. The second course was tougher by far, with moving sections of wall and things to dodge, and the occasional falling floor that resulted in a trip back to a ladder. Towards the end, I found myself rather out of breath. I was bumped by part of a moving wall, spinning me, and finally stopped with my back against another wall for a short rest. I would have been more worried about resting had I not passed by a few other people doing the exact same thing earlier. The boy with black hair came to me then, running down a hall, different from the direction I took.

"I feel like a hero already!" he laughed and panted at the same time, turning and resting his back on the same wall next to me. Those words were like an epiphany to me, or at least a realization that I was taking the right path in life. It wasn't just Sephiroth that was the hero. SOLDIER was where heroes were born. There were other people like me, who wanted to do good in the world. I couldn't help but to smile at the boy. I thought, I might actually fit in there, and being away from home wasn't going to be as dreary as it seemed. The boy looked back at me. "Come on, let's finish this!" he said, pushing himself off the wall. "I almost got to the end, but the last piece of floor before the water fell."

"Water...?" I questioned as he took my hand, running further into the course. We ran through a few more hallways, rolling through holes in moving walls and swerving away from swinging objects, and finally came to one long hallway. I could see that there was a drop at the end, and sure enough, it looked like there was water. The other boy looked at me again as we started to run.

"Don't forget," he said in a huff, picking up his pace. "The floor at the end is gonna fall." I didn't really know what he expected me to do about that, but I continued to run. As we reached the last stretch of the hall, I felt the floor start to shake under our feet. The boy took a few more steps and then jumped out past the end and into the water. I tried to follow, but as I went to jump, the floor broke apart under my feet. Luckily, I still managed to push myself off the crumbling floor, but only enough to land back on the side I came from. Now there was a large gap in the floor between me and the water. I saw a few people in the water, swimming to the shore and the exit, and I knew I didn't have too much time. The hole was just small enough that I might make it if I jumped my furthest, so I shut my eyes, took a deep breath, looked back ahead at the hole, and started running. I didn't have too much memory of the jump itself, but I did remember the splash I made when I hit the water. From there, it was just a short swim out, and I made it. That was probably the moment I was most proud of myself for in my life.

The next simulation started up soon after that. I didn't see the boy with black hair there. Instead, I was alone in a small metal room with a door. Then, I heard the sound of the Director over the intercom again.

"Congratulations to everyone who has made it this far," he started. "You will now all be tested briefly on your battle capabilities." I swallowed, having been worried to hear him say that. Nevertheless, I knew it was coming, and if I was going to be in SOLDIER, I couldn't be afraid of fighting.

"You will notice that there is a single door in front of you," the Director continued. "When you defeat your one opponent, a key will be awarded to you, and you will be sent to the next area immediately." He cleared his throat, and I heard an electronic noise behind me. Spinning around, I noticed a number of weapons appear against the wall. "You may battle with any of the weapons you will find behind you. Your opponent... is armed with a low-level electric gun, three hits by which you should be rendered unconscious. If you are _not_ rendered unconscious after three, you will still be disqualified. Good luck."

Another electronic noise sounded by the door on the other side of the room, and I looked back to see a robotic man with a shield and a sparking gun. The gun powered up for a moment and an electric blast shot across the room at me. I dived to the side to avoid the blast, and quickly scrambled over to a large sword that was resting against the wall. Grabbing the sword, I underestimated its weight and got stuck in place for a moment, trying to move it faster. Despite my realization that the sword wasn't the weapon for me, the robot still managed to act before I did, and I found myself on the floor, recovering from the first electric hit I took. I dodged another shot, this time running to the gun that caught my eye. I grabbed the gun and immediately spun around, firing at the robot before it got another chance to hit me. The bullets ricocheted off the shield and it raised it's gun again.

Avoiding another blast, I attempted to run up closer to my enemy and aim around the shield, but that was a mistake. As soon as I got close, the robot shoved it's shield at me, stunning me for just long enough to be hit with my second shock. I was on my back on the floor again, but now I was also by the feet of my enemy. At the last moment, I got an idea, and as the electric gun powered up to hit me for the final time, I grabbed the bottom of the robot's shield and slid myself between its legs, coming out behind it. I didn't give the thing a moment to turn around, filling its back with bullets until it broke down on the floor. It was a strange feeling, using a gun like that. I'd never actually shot anything before that day. It didn't really feel like a victory actually, but at least I managed to scrape by.

I pushed myself back up onto my feet, and as I did, the area around me changed into a huge city location at night. Many of the other hopefuls were standing around the area, including the boy with the black hair. I walked up to him, catching my breath.

"What are we doing now?" I asked, and he turned to wave his hand at me.

"Don't know..." He shrugged, looking around the area. "I guess there waiting for a few last people to finish their robot fight."

"How'd you do?" I asked, fearing his answer.

"Piece of cake!" He grinned and gave me a thumbs up. I nodded, forcing a smile despite feeling bad about my own performance.

"Gentlemen!" The Director's voice came over the intercom again, causing a few people to jump. "This is the final test. A strong congratulations to you for making it here!" There were mumbles and generally excited noises coming from the people all around. I was excited too, but I also wondered if any of them were as nervous as I was.

"I've failed here two times before," said a man standing near me and the boy. That definitely didn't make me feel any better.

"Your goal in this final step," Deusericus continued, stretching his words, "is simply to get to the building marked by search lights. This is an ordinary city environment, and we have set up no moving walls, falling platforms or rope swings for you to worry about." It was easy to see the building the Director was talking about. Everything about that seemed too easy, which only made me more worried when he continued. "However, most of you won't make it to the end. As of now, we've released monsters into the streets. These will be your only obstacles." I heard more whispering among the people, and this time they sounded a bit more nervous. "You can feel free to fight the monsters if you'd like, but know that they're beyond the difficulty level for most SOLDIER third classes. Good luck, and I look forward to working with you in the future."

The final bell went off, and everyone started running in the direction of the building marked by search lights. I came to a set of stairs that took me down onto the city streets, and the first thing I saw when I got to the bottom was one of the other hopefuls getting tackled into a wall by a bunch of wolf-like monsters. They piled on him, and I could see him fade away as he was removed from the simulation. Pulling myself together, I ran down another street before the wolves noticed me. My heart was racing already. I could only find myself wondering about how much pain they let you feel before you're pulled out of simulation.

I ran across another street and down an ally, and came out into a wide open plaza, where many of the other men were struggling to fight or flee from monsters. Keeping as close to the building walls as I could, I narrowly avoided being spotted by a couple of flying creatures that each had one eye. I decided on an ally way that I'd go for as I ran through the plaza, but as I got there, I found myself face-to-face with a humanoid monster holding a wrecking ball, and ducked just in time to avoid an attack that took out part of the wall nearby. Back-stepping, I spun around and started to run to the ally just before that one, but the monster pursued me. I ducked again when I heard the glass of a window smashing behind me, and shortly afterward the wrecking ball broke the bit of ground just behind my feet. The monster seemed to keep getting closer to me, and I was almost hit again as I turned into the next ally.

There was a new set of stairs before me, and I sprinted up towards the top as quickly as I could. Looking back, I could see that the monster was slower when climbing stairs.

"Hey there," a voice said behind me, causing me to flinch. The black haired boy waved again as I ran over to him.

"We have to get out of here!" I said, noticing that we were now on a roof. "Is there another way down?"

"Not that I know of." He shrugged. "I was considering jumping across the roofs, but... Whoa!" A light and a bit of wall smashed as the monster reached the top of the stairs behind me, spinning its weapon. "We're jumping, I guess!" the boy said, tugging my shirt for a second before running to the edge and leaping onto the next roof over. I followed, noting that the jump was actually shorter than the one I made earlier.

We continued to run and jump across a number of rooftops, steadily going in the direction of our goal. The monster didn't even attempt to follow us anymore after some time, but it still seemed to be a good way of avoiding unnecessary battles, at least until one point. As we landed on a new roof, one of those flying, single-eyed monsters swooped down in front of us and we lost our footing, tumbling backward off the side. Our fall was softened by a slanted edge that rolled us off a six foot drop to the street. When I sat up, I saw a couple of the men at the end of the street frantically gesturing to us, but when I turned to show the boy, he was stiff and staring behind me. I knew that whatever he was looking at was not good, and as I slowly turned around, I saw a massive beast with horns and purple fur, snarling at the both of us. On it's neck it had something locked in a small cage, but when I tried to look at it, my mind started to go blank.

"We're running..." the boy whispered to me, trying not to move, "away... now!" On that signal, we both scrambled around and fled down the now empty street, the monster roaring behind us. We took a turn as soon as we could, and we heard it slam into the wall as it followed, sending bricks flying. We climbed another flight of stairs, but they didn't slow the beast one bit. I heard the loud whistle of a train as we ran along the rooftop, and the boy looked back at me, taking my hand. "I have an idea!"

"What!" I asked, fearing the worst as he took us to the side of the building that overlooked the train tracks.

"On three, we jump!"

"What?" I said again, looking back at the monster and deciding the lesser of two evils.

"One... Two..." the beast was galloping toward us, claws tearing up the roof, and I turned back around to the tracks "Three!" We both jumped just as the monster was about to reach us, and just as a train came by the roof, landing on top of the first train car and rolling a few feet. "Heh?" The boy made a noise, getting to his knees. "Hahaha, yes!"

Then, just as we thought we were safe, we heard a loud banging noise. The monster that had been chasing us landed on the end of the train, about five cars down from us. Slowly, it started to approach us, stepping over the breaks between cars. The black haired boy looked ahead of the train, and than back at the beast.

"Shoot!" he said, putting a hand to his chin. "We're going the right way, but we'll never make it to the end before that thing gets here..." He looked around the area, and then down off the back of our train car. "Come down here with me!"

I said nothing, but followed the boy down a small ladder that took us to the coupling between the first and second car.

"We need to separate the two trains!" he said, yelling over the sound of the wheels. "Loosen and undo the latch on this side, and I've got the other one." I gave him a worried look as he climbed to the other train car. "Don't worry about me!" So I did what he said and started loosening the latch on my side of the coupling. It was screwed pretty tight, and even forcing my weight on it, I couldn't seem to manage to get it to come loose. Finally, it started to turn, just as I heard the footsteps of the monster approaching from above. "Hurry!" The boy said, undoing the latch on his side. He jumped back over to my side just as I undid the latch, and the rest of the train disconnected from the first car and started to fall behind.

"Great!" I said, trying to remember to breathe, despite my nerves. "Let's get back up top!" I climbed up the ladder first, and when I turned around to help him, I watched in terror as the monster from before ran along the tracks behind us, and was actually getting closer. "Come on!" I said, taking his attention away from the beast.

The boy started to climb back up the ladder, but the monster caught up and swung a massive paw at him. Pulling up his legs, the boy managed to avoid getting hit, but the train's ladder shattered, and I just managed to catch his hand before he fell. Unfortunately, there wasn't much for me to grab onto on the train, so I was having a hard time pulling him up.

"Whoa!" he said, looking behind at his dangling body and then back to me. The monster had fallen behind again, but was on its way to catching up. "Thanks for the save!" I tried to respond, but as I opened my mouth, I jerked toward the edge a bit and gripped his hand tighter.

"Ugh, the monsters getting close again!" I said, trying to pull him, but the air blowing by the train was too much. "What do I do?" The boy was silent for a minute, and he turned his eyes to a long metal pipe in his hand, a piece of the ladder that he still held on to.

"What's your name?" the boy asked, too calm for his own good.

"What...? Cloud!" I yelled back to him, wondering what that had to do with anything.

"Well, Cloud, you're almost there!" he said with a soft smile. "My name's Zack. Zack Fair." I glanced up for a moment to see that the beast was almost at the train again, then I looked back down at him and he was still smiling. "And I'll be your hero today!"

My eyes went wide as Zack opened his hand and slid from my grasp, and I watched him fall back through the air, a grin forming on his face. Shortly after he landed on the monsters back, pipe in hand, they both fell out of sight, and the train continued onward. Everything was strangely quiet after that. There were no more bumps or jerks from the train, there was no more fighting, no more monsters. I sat and stared off the back of the train until it came to the building marked by search lights, and I met the Director inside. He stretched a single hand, gloved in white, towards me as I approached, and I took it in mine.

"Welcome," he said with a single shake of the hand. "You are now... a SOLDIER."


	45. A SOLDIER's Promise Part 5

**Zack**

We set out for Banora as soon as we realized that was where Genesis would be. Lazard brought Cloud and I to a wooden ferry on the coast that Angeal had often used in the past. It was small, but sturdy enough to carry the three of us, and even the motorcycle. We headed out to sea from there, and I watched as the island grew closer, remembering what Lazard had said. Dumbapples only grew in Banora, he told me. It was something to do with the soil properties. Genesis always carried a dumbapple around. I should have caught on quicker...

When we reached the land, I took Cloud onto the rocky road with the motorcycle and Lazard followed behind, keeping to the skies with his white wing. My mind was very focused, so I said nothing as we approached the location of the old village. I couldn't help but to worry about how it would all go down. Genesis would try to fight me, I knew he would, but that didn't change the fact that he was once Angeal's friend, that he once had good in him. I slowed the motorcycle to a stop, stepping off and shutting down the engine, my gaze still fixed ahead. I took a few more steps, and I could see the giant hole where Angeal's hometown used to be, the greenish light of the planet illuminating the remains of wooden houses and windmills.

"It's so different now..." I said, stopping to take it all in. I heard Lazard touch down on the ground behind me, but he said nothing. "Could you watch over Cloud for me?" I asked him, still unable to take my eyes away from the scene.

"Certainly," he agreed, something gruff about his voice. The trip must have taken a bit out of him. I was about to ask if he was alright, but something else drew my attention. Up and past a few hills, a green light was shining up into the sky, too bright and too high to be natural.

"Hm? What's that?" I questioned, turning to look. Lazard stared off at the light as well, but didn't seem to have a response for me. I supposed that would be my destination.

Worrying again, I looked to the side at Cloud, then approached the bike where he sat. I couldn't help but to think that going to deal with Genesis was at least a little bit selfish. Cloud never needed to get involved in all of that. He wouldn't have even been in that state if it wasn't for me dragging him along to Nibelheim. I couldn't help but to wonder what he would have done in my situation, or what he would've said if he knew how things were going to go.

"Ngh... Ughh..." he murmured, sighing when I put my hand on his shoulder. Lazard stepped up behind me, nudging me with his glove.

"Don't worry about Cloud," he assured me with a smile. "I promise I will protect him." I smiled in response and turned my eyes back to Cloud.

"Cloud," I said quietly, taking back my hand and leaning down to him. "Wait here, all right? I'll be right back." His eyes moved a bit as I spoke, and I watched him for another minute before turning around and walking off toward the light.

Strangely enough, I followed the light down a path and to another hole in the ground. It looked like a cave down there, but it was definitely the source of the light. I knew there was no turning back, and it was useless to just stand there and do nothing, so one foot at a time, I lowered myself down into the hole and dropped. The sound the ground made when I landed was my first surprise. It wasn't a rocky, dusty or muddy noise, but the sound of metal under my boots. In fact, both the walls and the ground seemed to be a mixture of earth and steel, like some underground building that had only ever been half-finished.

"Was this... here before?" I wondered, looking ahead through the only door. I stepped further in, and the place looked more like a cave, except for a few electric lights that hung from the walls. "Where does it lead?"

My eyes then locked onto another strange sight. As I approached, I saw that a corner of the cave had been made into a makeshift living space, with a chair, a desk, a light, and books. There where even bits of wall built into the cave. On the desk, there was a small shelf that held a few cans, and three trophies, and right in front of me was a book of records. I flipped the book open, considering how strange this all was, and started to read the bookmarked entry.

_First Prize: Banora White Juice_

_ Processed Foods Category, National Agriculture Awards_

"Wow..." I said, looking it over. The book looked old, and only added to the eeriness of the whole setup.

_The idea to make this juice came from a Banora youth named Genesis._

"Wow," I said again. I noticed that an old photo was pasted to the book, and it looked like a younger Genesis. "Just wow!"

_Genesis's comments: I am very honored. Banora White juice tastes great, but the fruit itself is _

_ quite tasty as well. My dream is for my parents and me to serve the hero Sephiroth our apples _

_ one day. Since we are close in age, I would like to show him what I've accomplished in my life._

I closed the book slowly, my eyes turning up to a few more pictures on the wall. Genesis was in most of them, along with many people I didn't know, and then I saw Angeal. I raised my hand to the photo, but jumped as a monstrous roar echoed down the hall of the cave. I didn't know how, but I could tell it had something to do with him.

"Genesis..." I sighed, placing the book down and turning in the direction of the noise. "Is there anything I can do to save him...?"

I started to walk down the dim-lit halls of the cave, until a voice froze me in place.

"You know, we all use to be friends," the voice said, quiet, but still echoing around me. "Sephiroth, Angeal, and I..."

"Genesis?" I called. It was definitely him, but he didn't seem to be anywhere around me. I began walking again as I looked. "I'm here for you."

"We had a battle once," the voice continued. "A mere simulation, but something went wrong. Sephiroth and I started to fight to our limits, and Angeal stepped in to stop us." The voice didn't seem to be growing louder or quieter as I moved, but somehow I knew I was going the right way.

"Angeal succeeded," he said after a pause, "but when his blade collided with mine, it shattered, and my shoulder was struck by a wayward shard."

"Genesis," I called again. "Where are you?"

"It was a minor wound, nothing a SOLDIER shouldn't have been able to handle." Obviously, he didn't plan on answering me. "That wound never healed... it degraded. For years now, I've been a prisoner to that degradation, searching for what I have now found..."

I saw a large, open gate ahead of me. The light flowing from inside hurt my eyes after being adjusted to the dimness of the cave, but I pushed forward nonetheless. I stepped through the light, but what I found on the other side was surprisingly dark. I was in a huge, open cavern now, and in the center was a monstrous tree, it's branches stretching high up to envelop an enormous, red glowing orb. By the trees roots, Genesis stood, head leaned back and speaking into the air.

"My soul, corrupt by vengeance," he started as I approached, "hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey... in my own salvation." He lowered his head and turned to me, away from what appeared to be the statue of a woman clasping the same orb. "You're late."

Genesis' skin was paler now. All color had left his hair, his wing, his clothing, his eyes... all of it was ghostly. His voice sounded pained as well, like Lazard's. The degradation process was really getting the best of him now. He was almost... fading away.

"LOVELESS again?" I asked, walking across the cold stone on my way to him. He smiled and almost looked like I perked him up just by knowing.

"You have succeeded Angeal's spirit, and carry a part of Sephiroth within you," he said, and I flinched at Sephiroth's name, slowing to a stop in front of him. "Thus, the three friends are reunited once again... and LOVELESS is reenacted."

"No!" I said, swallowing my anger. "Open your eyes, Genesis!" I swung out my arm, and it seemed to snap him out of the daze he'd gotten himself into, if only for a moment. He looked troubled, staring at me in silence for the longest of moments, but his expression turned to a smile once again, and he began to pace.

"When the war of the beasts brings about the world's end..."

"I... I've come here to help you," I said, throwing my hand on my chest, hoping he would stop; hoping over everything that he would just stop and listen to reason.

"...The goddess descends from the sky." He turned to me with that same smile, stretching his arms out to the sides, his long, red, decorated sword held to his right. "Wings of light and dark spread afar. She guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting." As he finished, he gestured to the orb on the top of the tree and it let out a piercing noise with a flash of light.

"What is that?" I asked, watching it as it continued to illuminate the room.

"The gift of the goddess..." He gestured his hands with a smile, and I looked back to him. "A heavenly boon found only in Banora."

"I thought the cells were the gift!" I yelled in frustration, taking a step forward. His expression turned serious at my raised voice.

"There are various interpretations," he said. I stared at him, and hung my arms.

"I don't understand..." I just wanted it to be over. I wanted that all to stop. No more poems, or goddesses, or endings. We weren't acting out anything. I just wanted it to stop.

"To ponder the mystery is in itself a gift..." He turned and walked back over to the statue, standing before it. "We will all... join the lifestream. You... are no exception." He almost sounded as though something else was speaking for him at that point, and the light in the room began to collect around the tree. Slowly, he raised his sword to point it up at the shining orb. "The planet... has become my guardian."

With a stab of his sword into the air above him, Genesis called forth the light from the orb, and it rained down on him in a concentrated beam. The sound the orb was making began to sound more like a howl, and I could hear Genesis yelling from inside the light. Something else was going on here, stronger than Genesis.

"Keep talking to me!" I called to him, trying to take another step. "Don't let it take over!" His yelling got louder, and the light looked as though it was flowing straight into him. "You're not a monster, you're one of us!" His yell became a terrible roar, and I knew I was no longer reaching him. I grabbed the Buster Sword, pulling it out and running at him, shouting with all my anger. "Damn you!"

The light became blinding, and when it cleared away, I was no longer standing in front of Genesis. Instead, there was a massive red sword stabbed into the ground, towering high above me. Behind it, both the tree and Genesis had disappeared, and in their place was a monster, clad in red armor, and standing as tall as the tree itself. It roared that same, terrible roar, and reached for the sword. I could see now that the orb from the tree was imbedded into the sword like a materia. Taking a few steps back, I realized that the entire place was now covered in a looming green aura. There was no running away from this.

"Ugh, why!" I shouted, and jumped back away from the wide-arced swing of the massive blade. The beast roared again, and pushed the sword slowly into the ground. Particles of light gathered around the area and started to form shapes. Then, I realized that it was creating Genesis copies, ghostly ones, just out of thin air. Four copies were created, and all four came at me at once. Ducking under the first attack, I drove my sword through the copy, but it didn't kill the thing and I had to block another attack.

"Of course you're using scythes!" I gritted my teeth, breaking my guard to run back away from the other three. When I turned around to face them again, I had the lightning materia in my hand, and I sent bolt after bolt in their direction as they approached me. "Damn, these guys aren't slowing down!" I said looking around for an alternative. It was then that I noticed that the sword was still stabbed into the ground, still being held there by the giant monster. What it looked like to me was that he was controlling the copies as long as he was stabbed down there, and I could use that to my advantage.

Turning to the ghostly copies, I waited until the last moment to fake them out and run to the monster's arm, slicing at its wrist. All I felt against my blade was the grazing of armor, and even though the monster made an agitated roar, I doubted that I did much damage. It retaliated by withdrawing the sword and swatting me away with the blunt side. I flew so far from the attack that I almost hit the wall near where I came in, and I could see that the monster simply returned the sword to the ground, and the copies came back.

"Okay..." I thought about the situation as the ghosts grew closer. "This could be difficult." I wasn't about to give up, however, so I started charging straight forward. I yelled on my way, meandering between the copies and landing hits as I moved, but still staying focused on my real target. Once I got close enough to attack the wrist again, a better idea came to mind, and I launched myself at the orb that was imbedded in the sword. This attack, the monster really screamed, and pulled back the sword so fast that I almost got chopped in two. I was ready for retaliation, so I made safe distance between myself and the giant. Unfortunately, I wasn't ready for that retaliation to come from the ground, and I was tossed to the side by a black flame that burst up underneath me.

Rolling to my feet, I was pretty angry, and started charging directly at the giant again. It didn't seem to be sticking the sword back in the ground, but it didn't matter to me. When I got close, the monster punched with it's free hand, keeping the sword away from me, but I jumped up away from the attack and grabbed onto a piece of armor on that arm. Pulling myself up and running down the arm, I was quickly shaken off, but I used the momentum to throw myself to the other arm with the sword. I dodged another blast of black flames and jumped at the orb, stabbing the Buster down into it. Strange thing was, my sword went a ways into the orb, but it didn't feel as though I'd actually cracked it. Instead, all I could feel was pressure, and that pressure built as the armored monster screamed its loudest roar yet, and I could hear Genesis' voice there too. There was an explosion after that, and I was thrown back to the floor in a heap.

Everything was a lot quieter all of a sudden, and the mysterious light had left the area. I got back up to my feet, still holding my sword. The tree was back now, but it was dulled, and where the branches had once wrapped around the red orb was empty. By it's base, Genesis Rhapsodos stood, weaving around in place, just barely clutching his decorated blade. There was something different about him now, and as he took a step forward, I could see what it was. All the color had come back to him. His hair was brown, his skin looked healthy, his uniform was red again, and the eyes that he kept so firmly locked on me shined through the shadows.

"My soul, corrupted by vengeance..." He began to speak pained words, stumbling slowly toward me. "...hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey... in my own salvation." He stopped, placing his hand on his chest and standing straight, his eyes staring to the ceiling for a moment before returning to me. "...and your eternal slumber."

He was reciting that before, I thought, but he hadn't added the last part. What did it all mean? Then, I considered it. Genesis was saying that he received an injury in a fight with Angeal and Sephiroth, an injury that he said a SOLDIER should have been able to handle, but he couldn't handle it. He quit not too long after that, once the degradation process had really set in, and that was his torment. Now, he was standing there, looking just like he did before that fight, and before all that torment. He finally healed, and that _had_ to be his salvation. But... my eternal slumber? He was so set on reuniting with Sephiroth and Angeal. Did he really just want to finish that fight? But that would've meant he planned on me coming after him...

"Does this mean... you knew...?" I asked, taking a step forward. "From the beginning?" He smiled, slowly, pointing his blade at me. Then, with a single attack, he rushed forward. It wasn't too hard to dodge him in that state, so I did, and he stumbled to a halt on the other side, his back facing me.

"Stand and fight," he said, turning around with a scowl, so tense that I could hear the leather of his gloves pulling where he held his sword. "SOLDIER first class, Zack!"

Why did he need to fight so bad? All I wanted to do was to save him. He was healed from the degradation already. Why wouldn't he just leave? I choked as I held my breath, letting the air out of my lungs in a frustrated scoff. Slowly, I lowered my head with a sigh.

"Why is everyone... always pushing things on me?" I reached my hand back and found the hilt of my sword again, and with a final grunt, I readied it in front of me for the last time, locking my eyes on the man who stood before me. Genesis' shoulders rose and fell as he stared back. He looked a little fearful, but at the same time, I could see a rage and a longing that was taking over him. The leather crinkled again as he stood up straight, holding his sword out in front on him, and with a smile he ran his hand down his blade. The length of the sword began to glow a fiery red, and he took the hilt with both hands.

He came at me then, slicing his blade through the air with more power than I thought he had left. I blocked his first attack, but I felt the anger behind the blow. His second attack came just as quickly and just as fiercely from the side. I blocked that too, but the impact nearly knocked me off my feet. Backpedaling, I looked over his stance and charged in for my own attack. When my sword clashed with his, red sparks flew, and I could see that he was smiling now. He wanted me to attack.

"The world needs a new hero," he said, raising a hand to my face. I realized what he was doing as it was too late, and I was bombarded by a series of fireballs he shot from his body. Rolling across the ground, I managed to move fast enough to dodge a few remaining fireballs that blew up some stalagmites behind me, still grasping my face in my hand. Genesis was laughing, and then he charged at me again. I blocked the first blow, and it knocked me up from my knees to my feet, but I was too dazed to keep up with him. A second attack sliced across the front of my leg, I blocked the third, and the fourth one knocked me to the ground again.

"Argh!" I yelled, feeling the cold ground under my palm as I forced myself back up, swinging my sword a few times. None of my attacks did anything but bounce off his blade, then he hopped back. With another motion of his hand, red flame swords formed in the air around me and shot forward. I dove to the side just before I could be decapitated by them, and one grazed me upon my landing. Genesis himself was on me again, striking with another combo attack. This time, my shoulder took a hit, and his blade just missed my face where I already had a scar. I swung back, cutting his chest before he parried my sword away.

He grabbed his chest for only a moment, then yelled as he ran at me, jabbing his sword. The attack grazed the other shoulder when I moved away to the side, but I spun myself around and managed to hit Genesis hard in the back, seeing some blood this time. He stumbled a few steps, and I followed up with a few attacks that he just barely managed to block. Surprising him, I used one of my hands to punch him in the face, and he shoved me away after taking the hit.

"I'll take the world with me!" he panted, raising his sword and forming a magical symbol in the air above it. I looked up, and suddenly a mass of energy was pouring down on me from the symbol. The blast pushed me against the wall, and when it stopped, I fell to my knees. Genesis' sword swung at me, sticking into the rock as I ducked under it. Kicking at his legs, I rolled past him and regained my footing, Buster Sword in hand.

I could hear Genesis breathing heavily as he pulled his sword from the wall. It started glowing red again, and Genesis glared over at me. He started to run wildly, so much anger in his eyes, or maybe just such a will to win.

"You will perish!" he screamed, but despite all his intent, he was weak at that point. I saw my chance, and I took it.

A single, focused attack threw Genesis into the air. I watched the red sword spin out of his hands, and I watched his eyes widen as he flew. It was another one of those moments, almost like slow motion, where you could see what was going through the other person's mind. He knew he'd lost then. He still looked frightened for a moment, but then strangely peaceful as he fell. The statue of the woman broke apart next to me, having also been hit by the attack, but all went silent as Genesis finally hit the ground, and his sword stabbed down behind him. Genesis was no longer moving.

I hung my head in silence for a minute, wondering about what could have gone differently, but I knew that nothing good could come of those thoughts. So I walked up to Genesis' body, and hoisted him up over my shoulder. I wasn't going to leave him in that cave. He'd spent too much time there already.

As I walked out, I could only think about how he was lighter than he looked, and how _he_ probably felt lighter now too. He didn't have a wing anymore, but suddenly he was more free than he'd been in a long time, and that had to be a good feeling. The sun started to shine through the cavern from above. I'd left the others outside just before dawn, and I knew I needed to see them again. I needed to let them know... to let them know that it was finally over...


	46. A SOLDIER's Promise Part 6

**Cloud**

Memories were becoming more scattered, more distant. I remembered sitting awake somewhere, unable to move, unable to speak. Zack was talking to me, and I thought someone else was there too, but I couldn't do anything to let them know I could hear, to let Zack know. For a time, I hoped that was one of the memories that wasn't really true, but then I knew that something was wrong with me, so if that memory wasn't true, I probably didn't have anything to connect to the real world. I could feel myself breathing. That was one thing. I knew I was breathing, and I knew that breathing was real. I knew that I could think, hear some things, see some things... but again the more I tried to recall what was really going on, the more it escaped me. I was waiting for something, someone maybe, to show me or tell me what my life had become. I didn't know why. Ever since I was a child, I mostly looked after myself. I couldn't remember when that changed.

Every recent event fled away, and memories became more like distant thoughts and sensations. There was... something about fire, something terrible. Something, some place, someone was hurt, someone was... the memory was gone. I could still remember Modeoheim by name, searching for the closest fragmented thought I could find, but it was in such pieces. I was there with someone, I thought. There was a crash, a plane or a helicopter. I was... there on a mission. Oh, right... I made it into SOLDIER, didn't I?

Director Lazard Deusericus welcomed me in, shaking my hand, and that was it. There was so much more freedom in SOLDIER than there was as an infantryman... than there _probably_ was as an infantryman. A series of missions were posted for willing and able bodied men to sign up for, and sometimes we would get summoned to a particular mission under a higher ranking operative, but there always seemed to be some room for objection. SOLDIER was the elite task force, and everyone seemed to know it. My next few trips into the city, donning the blue uniform of a third class, I no longer felt like I was a child out of his place. People treated me with respect, because they knew I was there to protect them. Being in that position was like a dream for me, and I proved myself time and time again in the missions, raising myself to the rank of second class at breakneck speeds.

Despite all my excitement, I couldn't help but to get stuck on thoughts of my final test before I was even accepted, and the black-haired boy that grinned through the whole thing. It had been months since that day, and I hadn't seen him again. I didn't see him at all until one day, when I was walking down the hall on my way to meet my squad for a mission. Someone came running around the corner and slammed into me before I had the chance to react. I saw a helmet roll before I saw the person's face. I couldn't remember what type of helmet it was. Zack looked up at me from his new seat on the floor, grinning and scratching at the back of his neck. What type of helmet was it?

My mind went blank again, and I was thrown into the realization that I wasn't actually living out that moment. Why couldn't I remember the helmet? Why was that thought bothering me so much? I knew that Zack had made it into SOLDIER... or at least I thought I did. It was a SOLDIER helmet, right? Zack Fair, SOLDIER first class. For some reason, the name didn't feel quite right, and that was bothering me more than anything else. SOLDIER first class... SOLDIER second class... SOLDIER second class, Cloud Strife.

"Strife, huh?" the black-haired boy said, throwing his arms up behind his head. We were walking down the streets of Midgar at night, just the two of us. I didn't know if it was the same night, or if my mind had jumped ahead, but we were still the same age. The city streets just felt... more familiar. Slowly, I felt myself fall back into the moment, as though it wasn't just a memory at all.

"Yeah." I nodded gently, watching him walk next to me. "And you're Zack Fair. I remember that." He grinned, glancing back at me.

"I think it suits me." He shrugged a bit. I supposed I really wasn't all that used to interacting with people much. Back at home, I was usually by myself, or just with my mom. Sometimes, I'd get to hang around with Tifa, but she had other friends that would usually get to her first. Even still, I thought there was something unique about Zack in his mannerisms, something that really told me that he was a good guy. "So, where ya from, Cloud Strife?" he asked after a moment, looking ahead again.

"Nibelheim," I answered, and he started to laugh, so I interrupted him. "How about you?"

"Me?" He turned his head to look at me and put a thumb to his chest. "Gongaga." I couldn't help but to laugh a bit too. I tried to stifle it, but Zack caught on anyway. "Hey, what's so funny about that? You know Gongaga?" He sounded a bit defensive, but my smile seemed to make him feel better.

"No," I shook my head, feeling a gentle breeze as we continued forward, "but it's such a backwater name."

"Ditto Nibelheim!" he said, picking up his pace for a few steps. I followed closely behind him.

"Like you've been there." He slowed to a stop when I said that, and I had to stop too so I didn't walk into him.

"I haven't, but there's a reactor there, right?" he asked, turning around to face me. I nodded, wondering what he was getting at. "A mako reactor outside Midgar usually means..."

"...nothing else out there." I said the words at the same time as him, realizing his point, and we both laughed. Zack continued to smile, and I could feel that I did too, and after a moment he took my hand.

"I want to show you something then, okay?" he said, and we started to walk again. The next thing I knew, we were climbing a structure a little further into the city. I thought it would be dangerous at first, but Zack assured me that it wouldn't be. It felt like we were climbing up for a while, but I supposed I was just going at a slow pace. I was used to structures like that being more rickety like the bridges on Mt. Nibel back home, but every time I got a bit worried, Zack lent me a hand and helped me up. When he pulled me to the top, I couldn't believe my eyes. We were on a roof with a view that let us look down over most of the city. I'd been in Midgar for quite a while at that point, but I had never really had a chance to see how big it was.

"Wow," was all I could say, but it seemed to make Zack smile.

"Quite a view, huh?" he said as we walked a little closer to the edge of the roof and sat down. "I found this place one time, and I've been coming here to think ever since. You can't see anything like this in Nibelheim, right?"

"Ditto Gongaga," I said softly, taking the sight in, "...I'm sure." I turned my eyes up to the stars. The city was beautiful, but the night sky would always outshine it. I remembered how I would sit on my roof and stair at those stars, those same stars. It was the same sky, but so many things had changed for me. I missed my home, but I couldn't help but to love the things my new life had brought me. I looked over at Zack, and he was also looking at the sky. I could see the stars reflecting off his eyes, and his mouth was open a little in a smile.

"Someday... I'd like to fly up really high into the sky." His smile broadened as he thought about that. "It's the only place I can't reach, and it's so... big. I can't really think of a good way to describe it, you know?" I nodded to myself and made a noise. He seemed to take that as enough of an answer, and continued to watch the stars.

Then, I noticed that we were still holding hands. It felt sort of strange just to pick it out like that. I hadn't really held anyone's hand before, except for maybe a few worried adults back home. I wondered if we were adults now. We were looking after ourselves, we had jobs, and our own places to stay. We were well on our way to becoming heroes, so I guess that made us adults. I was a thirteen-year-old adult. But... what did it mean when two adults held each other's hands?

I looked back up from our hands, and Zack was looking at me, and all of a sudden it felt like we were somewhere else. There was something else in Zack's eyes, something tumbling around with the mako glow, like a memory. I felt his hand against mine, and I felt like I was back on my roof, back home, under the stars. Maybe I felt like I was on a ferry in the water, or tossing gravel from atop a rocky ledge, but I wasn't in Midgar. I wasn't in the city where the poor people on the lower plate had that beautiful sky as hidden from sight as Zack's eyes became to me. My mind was going blank again, but I didn't want it to. I wanted to see Zack. I wanted to see Zack anywhere.

Modeoheim tried to come back to me. I was there on a mission. I was there alone, or with infantrymen. I was the only SOLDIER there, but... wasn't Zack there? No, he couldn't have been, because I was the only SOLDIER. I felt like my eyes blinked open for a second, but I didn't see anything. Everything was just darkness now. I heard gunshots.

Zack made it into SOLDIER, right? SOLDIER first class, Zack... SOLDIER second class... Zack... SOLDIER first class, Cloud Strife. More gunshots. I was the only SOLDIER at Modeoheim, with two infantrymen, and Tseng from the Turks, but what was my mission. The memory was trying to come back, but then something moved me, somewhere, and I heard a voice.

"Cloud, lookout!" the voice shouted to me. It was familiar. It was... Lazard, the director of SOLDIER, but where was he? What was going on?

I heard a few more gunshots, a few last noises, and my mind finally went blank again. The memory was gone, and I was once again lost to my own oblivion.


	47. A SOLDIER's Promise Part 7

**Zack**

The sun gently lit the horizon as I carried Genesis through the earthly remainders of his hometown. Everything was so calm and silent, so that the only noise came from the grass bending under my feet and the occasional light breeze. I found the others just as the sun began to peek over the hills, not where I'd left them, but under the shade of one of the famous Banora white apple trees. Cloud was sat in a small chair near the base of the tree, and Lazard was sitting with his back rested against the side of it. He was either calm or distressed, but he didn't look to me as I came and rested Genesis' body on the opposite side of that chair. I shifted Genesis to make sure he looked comfortable, and then moved to Lazard, getting down on one knee. He looked injured.

"Shinra attacked us," he said, voice even more pained than it had been when I'd left.

"Save your strength," I said as he started to shift. It was over, we didn't need any more pain now.

"I got some help..." he grunted, pointing his finger, "from him... over there." I turned my head to follow his finger, widening my eyes and rising to my feet. Curled on the ground by the roots of the Banora white tree was a creature I hadn't seen for a long time. It was another Angeal copy, like Lazard, but one of the earlier ones, one of the ones that resembled a monster if not for its white wings.

I walked up closer to it, and then gasped as a memory struck me. This wasn't just any of the old Angeal copies. I remembered years ago, when the Midgar streets were dangerous and I was worried about Aerith's safety, that copy had come along and rescued the two of us from robots under Genesis' control. He was like Lazard, he had some of Angeal's spirit. Even as a monster, that copy chose to fight its fate and become a hero.

"It's you..." I said aloud, feeling my stomach knot up. The creature wasn't moving. It used the last of its strength to protect Cloud and Lazard, just like it had protected Aerith in the past. I knew that must have meant something. I knew that Angeal could have never really believed he was a monster. Even after his death, Angeal... Angeal would always be a hero. I gasped again, putting my hand over my mouth. Suddenly, Angeal's death felt like it hit me so much harder than it ever had before. I felt... so proud, but I couldn't stop myself from choking, or the edges of my eyes from burning. I thought, I'd been working so hard to fix everything that now that it was over, I realized just how much I'd lost... and how much Cloud had lost.

I heard a small sound behind me as I hung my head, a gentle drop that broke the silence of the sky and the trees. When I looked back, Lazard's eyes were shut, and his hand was limp by his side.

"Director!" I yelled, rushing back and dropping down to him. He was smiling gently, but his chest was still. The breeze drifted through his hair and marked the passing of the man who just wanted to save the world. It became harder and harder to breath then, and I punched my fist into the ground, just wanting to scream. The Director... Lazard wouldn't have wanted that, though. I knew, in his way, he really _did_ save the world. He overcame his need for vengeance, he lived the rest of his life in a way that would have made Angeal proud to share that wing... and he protected Cloud. In the very least, he saved _my_ world. Slowly, I rose back up to my feet.

"Thank you," I said finally, watching him sit there, no longer in pain. I knew then... I was happy for him.

I sighed and took a seat on the ground in front of the chair, still watching Lazard. Life was such a complicated thing sometimes, I thought. I used to take dangerous missions all the time, and my life was probably always in danger, but it never felt like that. It used to feel like I could save everyone, including myself. Now none of that seemed to be true. I slowly turned my eyes to Cloud. His eyes were shut, but he was breathing more easily than he usually had been. I wondered what was on his mind.

"You're not gonna leave me too, are you?" I sighed and crawled in closer to put my hand on his in his lap. "It's not fair that I've dragged you through all of this," I said, squeezing his hand a bit. "But I'm... I'm really glad that you were with me." I listened as he exhaled. "If this had to happen to you, I'm glad I was there by your side."

Cloud made a small noise, and I smiled, then I chuckled a bit.

"Ugh, I'm no good at this talking thing." I laughed, pushing myself back up to my feet and waving my hand in a sort of salute. "I'll be right back. I have something I want to do."

I left the Buster Sword behind, stuck in the ground not far from the tree, and took a short walk along the path. Banora white apples were supposed to grow at random times during the year, so I figured I could find at least one tree that was bearing the fruit. Sure enough, I found some of the apples and returned to the others. One apple, I placed in Genesis' lap, supported by his arm. The next, I gave to Cloud, happy to still feel warmth in his hands. The final apple, I kept, holding it up and looking over the three quiet people sitting before me.

"Okay," I smiled, trying to keep my spirits up, "let's eat!" I looked over to Genesis, who had the same peaceful smile as Lazard. He always wanted to share his apples with Sephiroth. "Sorry I'm not the real thing, but..." The apple was crisp in my mouth as I took my first bite. It was really juicy, and had a taste unlike any other fruit I'd had.

"Is it good?" Genesis' words were nearly a whisper, but I was startled nonetheless. I looked at him and his eyes were still closed, so I almost thought I was hearing things.

"Yeah," I answered after a moment, smiling again.

"The gift of the goddess..." he said, still quiet.

"This apple?" I questioned, holding it high and looking over the bite-mark. Genesis' lips parted slightly as he shook his head, and it looked almost like he wanted to laugh. "Huh?"

"Angeal..." he whispered, slowly opening his eyes and turning his head in the direction of Lazard's body. "The dream... came true." He shut his eyes again, letting his consciousness drift away, just as the Director's body began to fade away. It was the same green aura that overtook Lazard's body, the same one that had taken all the copies, but this one seemed more gentle... more complete.

I watched as he disappeared, and a few last white feathers drifted through the air. Then, the same glow started to take away the body of the other copy by the tree, the one that had protected Aerith. Angeal, in all forms, was finally saying goodbye. I was sad, but there was a certain warmth to it. I wanted to be happy, but it was still so sad to me. I supposed, goodbyes were always sad.

I walked over to the spot where the copy had faded away, reaching for something it had left behind on the ground. It was a piece of paper: a note. Picking it up, my heart seemed to skip a beat when I read the text. It was from Aerith.

_How are you?_, she started, and I felt like I had to hold back my tears again.

_I wish I knew where you were. It's already been four years now. This is the 89th letter that I've _

_ sent to you, but I don't even know where to send them anymore. I really hope that this final _

_ letter that I'm writing gets to you. By the way, the flowers are selling very well. They make _

_ everyone so happy- thanks to you, Zack! - Aerith_

"Four years?" I gasped, dropping the apple to the ground. Then, I turned my head to the sky, and I finally shouted. "What do you mean, final!" My voice echoed in the hills, and I stared deep into the sky for a long time until I once again heard the sound of the broken windmills turning in the breeze, and I remembered where I was.

"Aerith, wait for me." I walked over to Cloud with a new determination, hoisting him up over my shoulder and turning my head to him. "You're going to make it, too," I said to him. I was done losing the people I cared about. "You got that?"

I turned and started to walk back in the direction of the motorcycle and the ferry back to shore, but then I stopped to look back over my shoulder. Genesis was still leaned against the chair, still smiling, but still quiet. His friend had said goodbye, and he was at peace. I wouldn't gain anything by trying to carry a second person with me, and at that point, I figured he was happiest at home. So, with a final nod to say goodbye, I started to walk again, collecting my sword and leaving the island.

When I drove the motorcycle back onto the ferry, I decided to take a new course through the water. It didn't make any sense for me to take it back to the shore in the direction of Gongaga, especially since Shinra was bound to be waiting for me there. Also, I'd been keeping Aerith waiting for me long enough, Kunsel too. Who knew, maybe I had more friends back in Midgar than I'd thought, and I was definitely done with thinking things were over for me. I wasn't going to spend the rest of my life running. So I set my course to the North to Midgar. It had been... four years since I'd been there last. Weren't they going to be surprised to see _me_ again.


	48. A SOLDIER's Promise Part 8

**Cloud**

A blanket of white covered the images in my head. White, snowy, mountains. I found myself on the snowy mountains just outside Modeoheim. I had arrived with Tseng, and two other people. I was... exited, for some reason. What was it? It was... my first mission with him since... no, it was my first mission as a SOLDIER first class. I was the only SOLDIER on that mission... right? The others were falling behind, except for one other man, and we'd gotten to talking.

"Like you've been there," the man said to me. I forgot what he was talking about, but somehow I could still respond. I slowed to a stop and turned to face him.

"I haven't, but there's a reactor there, right?" I asked, and he nodded. "A mako reactor outside Midgar usually means..."

"...nothing else out there." He said the words at the same time as me, finally understanding my point. We both laughed, and I turned around to look back at Tseng and the infantryman, falling behind on the path.

"Good news," I shouted, and Tseng glanced ahead at me. There was something uncomfortable about being stared at by a Turk. "Me and..." I looked over at the man next to me, waiting for his name. His lips mouthed something to me, and my head felt strange. There was a name there, but I didn't quite hear it. It sounded like... but it couldn't have been... Zack... Zack...?

"Zack...?" I glanced across the table at the black haired boy. We were sitting in a small diner just off the main street in Junon. I was still calling him a boy, but it had been several years since we'd taken the SOLDIER entrance exam. I was now fifteen, and Zack had invited me out to dinner with him. Unfortunately, he'd also unwillingly invited half a dozen infantrymen who overheard us talking. The lower ranking troops always seemed to try and jump on any opportunity they had to be close to a SOLDIER, especially a first class, and especially when they didn't have to pay for dinner. Zack was zoning out at the door of that place, probably considering the short goodbye our tag-alongs gave us as they finished their steaks, and mourning the loss of a small fortune from his wallet. He perked up when he heard my voice and remembered that not everybody had walked out on him. "I had a good time."

"We barely talked." He laughed, inching his chair a bit closer to where I was. "Not quite what I had in mind, but..."

"Still... It was nice to just sit with you." I smiled, and received one in return. "We don't see each other too often between missions anymore." It was true. Since I'd become a higher rank, missions came in for me pretty frequently, and I hadn't had much time for a social life.

I missed the old days, when he and I would find new high places to sit together, when we'd talk about personal things like how to get over motion-sickness, or people we should have been writing to more often back home. I missed getting a little bit closer to him as I sat down or shifted, or holding his hand and wondering what it meant. It became a bit more complicated once we were only seeing each other on the job. Surrounded by infantrymen, there was seldom a moment where holding hands seemed to fit, but there were so many moments when we could see that the other one wanted to.

Sometimes we'd bump arms like they did in the infantry, a congratulatory gesture that held a hidden meaning for us. Sometimes, we'd find ourselves back to back in a firefight, or locking eyes for just a beat too long when we hid behind cover. We never actually said anything, even to each other, about what our feelings really meant. It was something we understood, or maybe we didn't understand it, but it was just sort of... there. It just happened, that after a certain number of times that we held hands, it just became natural, but only when we were alone. Of course, after those years, we both noticed it happening. It wasn't considered normal for two men in the military to hold hands, or to sit together alone at night, but we never let that become an issue for us, because we never brought it up. It wasn't exactly that we were avoiding the topic, but it had become a sort of quiet enjoyment that we shared. However, in the recent days, it seemed more like those feelings were going to surface, one way or another.

Even in that diner, after not having seen Zack off duty for months, it was all I could manage to not reach for him right there and then. I didn't really know what I wanted, to hold his hand, to touch his face, or maybe to embrace him. All I knew was that I wanted to feel close to him again. Apart from that, I felt stuck; stuck with my thoughts, stuck in that seat, not reaching for him for fear that the waitress might bat an eye in our direction.

I didn't know why, but I was being overwhelmed by that sensation of such distance between Zack and I. It was more than just those few months; it felt bigger, stronger, like years had gone by and all I wanted to do was to be able to feel him again, somehow. I had another awareness of where I was, not in the diner, but being spoken to by Zack, somewhere in the present time. It wasn't a memory, and it was making my desire so much greater to be able to see him. I felt a wooden chair beneath me, then time sped by. The sound of a motorcycle buzzed with the turning of the wheels I felt beneath me, then more time passed, and it was the shifting of a boat on water. I was starting to feel the breeze, and to hear bits of sound, but what I wanted, Zack, still seemed so far away. My mind drifted off again.

"Rise and shine!" Zack said, putting a hand on my shoulder. I looked around me, and I was at Nibelheim, my hometown. "You're a late sleeper on your own accord, huh?"

"I guess." I shrugged and put my hands on my hips. "What... have you been doing?"

"Not much." He shrugged back, taking his hand off my shoulder. "Our driver was getting impatient this morning. He figured out that our mission's been over for a while." I looked around still as he spoke. Something wasn't quite right. Something was supposed to have happened there, but I didn't know what.

"The other guy's not complaining?" I heard myself say, but I didn't remember saying it. I blanked out for a moment.

"Hey, Cloud?" he said after a pause.

"Huh?" I turned to look at him, and he was staring off toward the entrance of town. There was a long pause before he spoke again. I almost decided to respond for a second time.

"If you think I'm up to it..." he started, but paused again. Then he turned around with a big grin on his face. "I'd like to spar with you."

"...Spar?" I repeated, having a hard time accepting the word. Zack wanted to battle with _me_?

"_If_ you think I'm up to it," he said with a shrug. "You _are_ in SOLDIER, after all."

"Sure, but..." I couldn't remember what I said next, even as the words left my mouth.

"Well... hold back of course." He shrugged and then cocked his head at me. "Unless you're busy?"

"No, I'll fight you." I nodded, and he scratched the back of his neck.

"Man, 'fight' makes it sound so brutal." He turned away from me and gestured toward the entrance to town. "There's a safe place we can go out there."

My mind jumped again, and I was standing a little ways outside of Nibelheim by the water. The man that was with me was not Zack, as I expected, but a man in an infantry uniform. Something about looking at that infantryman hurt my head, so I turned around to face the town, and a man was running our way. I didn't really recognize him at first, but as he got closer, I noticed that it was Tifa's father. His eyes locked on me first, and he stopped, hesitating before he spoke. When the words finally came, he looked to the other man as though I wasn't there. Why was he looking at... him?

"You're not leaving," he said, sounding a little out of breath, "are you?"

"Not yet," I answered, shaking my head. "Why?"

"We don't want you to go away and leave Sephiroth behind," he answered, straightening himself out. "Some of us are worried that there might be a threat to the town."

Hearing Sephiroth's name started to trigger something in my head, but I couldn't quite grasp it. Why would they be worried that there was a threat to the town? Why would Sephiroth...? Just as something started to come back to me, my thoughts were interrupted by another voice.

"You're not leaving yet," the voice said, "are you?" It was the same words, but it wasn't Tifa's father. I turned around and found myself back on the streets of Junon, facing Zack, and he was waiting for an answer.

"I have to," I said, not wanting to leave either. "I need to head back to Midgar to get briefed on the next mission."

"Come on," he said, gesturing for me to come back. "I've got one last place I'd like to show you. I think you'll like it." I looked back over my shoulder in the direction the infantrymen were running, and hesitantly returned my eyes to Zack.

"Alright," I agreed after a moment, running back over to him. "Lead away!"

Zack ran ahead, and I followed closely behind. It seemed we had a bit of distance to cover. Our run eventually brought us to an elevator, and I watched Zack questioningly as we rode to the top. He made it a point not to look back at me until the doors opened and I could see where we were. I took a few steps out of the elevator, and stared off in awe. We were at the highest point in all of Junon, standing on the barrel of the giant Shinra canon that overlooked the ocean. I watched the birds flying around below us, and the waves that broke against the city wall. It was beautiful.

"Outdone myself this time, huh?" Zack said, stepping past me with his fingers locked behind his head. "I know you like high places, and I figured you can't get too much higher than this." He looked back at me, and when I saw his eyes, the same desire came rushing back. Zack was so real, and so unreal at the same time. There was a uniqueness about him that nobody else had, and I never wanted to let that go.

"Zack," I said, taking a few steps toward him. He turned his gaze back out to the ocean and then up at the sky.

"I still don't know the right word to describe the sky." He glanced back at me again as he spoke. "There are a lot of things that I don't really know how to put in words."

"Zack," I repeated, watching as he stared back at me. I wanted to go to him. I didn't want to leave and have months pass us by again. I didn't want to just sit there and hear him talk, not being able to reach out and touch him again. I knew I wanted to do something, but my instincts to flee started to kick in. Maybe it wasn't even instincts, but maybe I was just afraid to destroy what we had. "I have to get back to the helicopters." I said, turning away, but then Zack quickly walked around to stand in front of me.

"Cloud," he started, searching for the right words. "No matter how things go... even if we don't see each other for a long time... keep me with you." He placed his hand on my chest, right in the center, and I felt overwhelmed at his touch. "Right here, okay?" It seemed so simple, I thought, to just reach out and touch someone, but it wasn't. There was so much more that came with that touch, and I could feel it with every beat of my heart, and with every raise of my chest. Zack was staring into my eyes, and I knew I'd seen that look before. I had seen it somewhere else, not there, but somewhere that I couldn't quite find in my brain, and I was losing myself to it. "I know it sounds strange, but..."

Without another word, Zack pulled me close until our lips touched together, and a warmth flushed across my body. It was so sudden, and so public, and my heart was racing. The breeze rushed around us, and I could feel the tips of Zack's hair tickling my nose, and his leather glove closed against my chest, bunching my shirt. I didn't shut my eyes, but I still lost all thoughts about where we were, and just let the clouds, and the sun, and the birds take us in.

Zack drew away from me, only far enough to stare into my eyes again, and he smiled gently.

"I think I've thought of a word to describe the sky," he said, his voice almost in a whisper. "It's so... liberating." The word echoed in my head a few times, and my mind started to go blank again.

The last things I saw where Zack's smile, and his eyes, then I faded into darkness, warmth, and a peaceful bliss.


	49. A SOLDIER's Freedom Part 1

**A Heart For My Nobody says:**

**Hey all. Two tornadoes in Massachusetts today. Not nearly as bad as some of the other ones going around, but a lot closer to home for me. I live in Massachusetts, but luckily enough for me, I didn't get any worse than a nasty thunder storm. I just hope that everybody's remaining safe amongst all this crazy weather we're having, not just here but around the world.**

**Anyway, on a lighter note and one more relevant to fanfiction: I've reached 200 reviews! I've got all of you to thank for that, and I thank you very much! I've still been making sure to respond to every non-anonymous review, and I enjoy every second of hearing from you guys! You rock, and I hope I get to continue to hear from you as the story continues.**

**Also, I've now received my first two fanart pictures, both pertaining to this story! One was art celebrating 200 reviews from Kumagorogirl, and the other was a happy birthday present from a frequent reviewer, Angel . M . Demon! You can see both of these pictures from a link in my profile. Thanks again to both of you, very very much!**

**Now it's time that I stop ranting and let you get on to reading the update. I hope you enjoy! Thanks so much for reading!  
**

* * *

**Zack**

When we arrived on southern coast of the Midgar continent, I started up the motorcycle and left our ferry behind immediately. Although I did my best to stay as far away from the Shinra-owned town of Junon as I could, I knew it would only be a matter of time until my presence there was known. After all, I was only moving closer and closer to the people who were trying to hunt me down. Still, I had decided that I wasn't going to spend the rest of my life running. I had made my choice.

The roads of that area were a welcomed change from the rocks I drove on near Gongaga, and for the most part, it was a smooth trip, even when I had to take to the grass to avoid an oncoming truck that looked just a bit too much like it belonged to the army. What I didn't expect, however, was to ride over a hill and right into an infantry campsite. By the look of things, they'd been expecting me, so someone must have already sent out the word that I was there. Those Turks were really good at their job, I'd give them that.

"Shoot!" I said, glancing at Cloud and speeding up as I approached. "Hold on!" The motorcycle swerved past the camp as the infantrymen ran to meet me, bullets bursting from their guns. I felt a few shots breeze by me, and kept one eye on Cloud to make sure he didn't get hit. At first, I thought we'd made it by them, but a stray bullet caught the wheel of the bike and caused us to start spinning out of control. I grabbed Cloud, pulling him from his seat, and dove off the bike and onto the grass, holding him over me so that he wouldn't feel the impact. With a grunt, I got myself and Cloud back to our feet and started to run away from the troops. When I glanced back to see who was following us, I caught an opportunity and used the lightning materia from my pocket to do the final bit of damage to our bike. The motorcycle buzzed with electricity and then exploded, knocking back our pursuers and buying us enough time to escape into a nearby forest.

"Found us already," I said, pulling Cloud's arm up to a better position over my shoulder. It was awfully hard to run while trying to help him stand, so despite the danger, I decided to walk from there.

I considered our direction as I walked. I knew that there was a mountain range between us and Midgar. I also knew that there was an underground pass that Shinra built to easily get to the other side. Unfortunately, that pass was likely to be guarded by a number of troops, and we no longer had a vehicle to use to try and speed by them. It was either risk that path or climb the mountain, though, and either way Shinra already knew we were there. I heard the distant sound of crunching twigs in the forest behind us, and I knew that we were still being followed. I could hear myself panting, and Cloud was breathing harder too. When I adjusted him again on my shoulder, he made a small grunt.

"Whoops," I said, stopping to look at him. "My bad." His eyes were open now, if only a little, and it looked like he was staring back at me. The sound of the sticks and twigs became accompanied by the stomping of boots. "You look tired," I said listening as the stomping slowed. "I want to let you rest, but it seems like we don't have the time for that." I started walking again, slowly, and focused myself. The infantrymen had stopped and were watching me from behind. One of two things was about to happen. Either I would hear the sound of triggers and have only a moment to get me and Cloud out of the way of the bullets, or the troops would make a bad choice and rush at me with melee weapons. After a second, I heard the sound of running and counted myself lucky.

I placed my hand up on the hilt of my sword, and drew the blade as I turned around, hitting the infantryman in the stomach and sending him reeling through the air. It had only been one man who ran head-on, and the others went around the sides. They were also only wielding swords, however, so it wouldn't be a problem. I placed Cloud down and turned my eyes to the soldier on my left. Before he had a chance to react, I dashed to the man and used the blunt side of my sword to hit him hard against the ground. The third guy came running up behind me, but he was shouting the entire time, giving himself away. Before he had a chance to swing his sword, I spun around and knocked him up into the air, disarming him and rendering him unconscious in a single blow.

"Geez," I said, glancing around at the three downed men. They seemed to be the only ones who followed me. "These guys sure aren't trained too well." I walked back over to Cloud, helping him back to his feet. "You certainly weren't like these average infantrymen." I stared at him again for a long moment. It was nice to see his eyes open, and it might have just been wishful thinking, but it looked like he was starting to be more aware.

"There they are!" a man shouted from a ways behind us in the woods, and I looked back.

"What a bunch of persistent guys," I said, starting to walk and then building into a run. Gunshots sounded off behind us, but I wasn't too worried. First off, we were in a forest and those guys were a ways behind us. Secondly, that batch of men seemed to be pretty bad aims. I'd have to put in a complaint about the infantry training when I made it back to the Shinra building. I laughed a bit as a stray bullet hit a tree to my far left. "Like they'll hit me!" I said, smiling at Cloud. It seemed that my strength for carrying him had come back. There was something new driving me now.

I reached the end of the forest and there was a steep drop ahead of me. I looked to Cloud as I approached it, knowing that if we leaped down, I could make it, but our pursuers couldn't.

"Sorry about this," I said, holding Cloud tight against me, and then I jumped. The wind picked up against my face, and I angled Cloud as we fell. I felt the impact of the ground under my legs, but it wasn't too much to handle, and I started running again soon after. A minute later, the sound of bullets exploded from atop the hill near the forest, but I was way too far for them to hit by then.

Eventually, things had become quite enough for me to slow us back to a walk. I could see the mountains ahead of us, but we weren't yet close enough to the underground pass to worry about Shinra. I walked over to a tree, resting Cloud against it, and started to climb to the top. The view from the high branches showed me all the way to the mountains. It looked as though Shinra was building some sort of outpost there. There were several incomplete buildings and a bit of road that looked almost like a highway. Unfortunately, that probably meant that security there was pretty tight, but at least there were a few places to hide. I dropped back down out of the tree and sat next to Cloud on the ground, reaching into the pouch I had with me and retrieving the Banora apple.

"Looks like we're still in for a bit of trouble," I said, turning the apple over in my hand. Then, I held the fruit out in front of his nose, shaking it a little. "You haven't eaten in a few days now," I said, staring at his eyes. As expected, he didn't react to the apple, and I took it back, turning my back against the tree next to him. "Yeah, I know. After my mako treatments, I didn't eat for almost a week." I glanced back over to him. "Just wasn't hungry."

"Nghh..." Cloud said with an exhale. I turned over to him and put my hand on his head, letting my fingers run through his hair.

"Hey," I said, trying to make my voice both serious and comforting. "We're going to get you better, okay?" I lifted him back up to stand with me. "Come on, let's go."

After a short while of walking, we came to the area that was under construction. The place looked abandoned at the moment, which I normally would have taken as a bad sign, but either my head wasn't in quite the right place at the time, or I had just seriously had enough of not proceeding on my own terms, and I just walked straight ahead. I heard a click as I stepped into the middle of an open area, then many more clicks. Glancing around us, I could see that a number of Shinra troops had hidden themselves in the partially built structures. I supposed that more hiding for me meant more hiding for them. It was an ambush, and now there were over a dozen guns trained on the two of us.

"Geez," I said, drawing my sword with one hand and holding Cloud close to me. "You're making a big fuss over just the two of us." I stepped back and felt a metal beam behind me. "Well then... what should we do now?" I eased Cloud out of my arms as I talked, resting him on the ground. Then, I gripped my sword firmly, knowing that I was about to need to move very quickly. As a few of the infantrymen stepped closer, I turned around and stabbed my sword into the ground in front of Cloud, close enough to keep him pinned against the metal beam, and then dashed towards one of the groups of men.

As planned, I drew both the attention and the bullets away from Cloud as I ran. When I reached the first man, I spun and kicked him in the head, moving quickly over to another to hit him in the stomach. After that, I started to run again. There were too many people firing at me to focus on attacking, but I had another plan. As I ran around the open area, ducking and spinning away from bullets, the infantrymen started to fall, one by one, hit by friendly fire that was meant for me.

"We're in each other's line of fire!" The commander yelled, barely being missed by one of the bullets himself. "We're shooting each other!" A bullet struck down the soldier in front of him and he stepped back, flailing his arm. "Engage the target with close-range combat weapons!" I smiled when I heard that order. Once again, it was a bad call.

The infantrymen all started charging me with their swords, and I flipped over the first, kicking him away and rolling between another two. As I rolled, I pushed myself to stand on my hands and used both feet to kick the men on either side of me before flipping back up to a proper standing position. I ducked under an attack from another man, and grabbed his wrist, tossing him into a nearby wall. I started to lose track of how many people I hit. I tripped one man with a kick to his legs, punched another so hard that I broke his helmet, and threw others this way and that. It felt strange to be fighting people from the place that I worked for so long, but at least I knew that most of them would be fine when they woke up in a few hours. Finally, I stopped, double-checking the area for more men.

I looked back to Cloud just as more infantrymen were showing up, and they had motorcycles. That was bad. I couldn't stand there all day fighting those guys, especially since it was obvious that Shinra knew where I was, but I also couldn't try and carry Cloud away on foot if they were chasing us with motorcycles. I hoped that the sword I left behind would keep Cloud sufficiently pinned in place, at least for a few minutes, because I had to get out of there and find us a ride. I watched the soldiers for another moment before running off, grabbing one of the infantry blades on the ground and hearing an order to pursue me as I left.

I ran past more and more buildings in construction, heading in the direction of the bit of highway I saw from the tree. I heard the sound of motorcycles behind me, and as I made it onto the road, they sped past me, nearly running me down. I gasped, slowing to a stop as they turned around to face me, revving their engines. There were two of them, but it was still a ride, and there were _only_ two of them. I smiled, readying my sword. Then, all of a sudden a helicopter rose up next to the road, shining a bright light down on me. When my eyes adjusted, I grimaced at the sight.

"The Turks, huh?" I said, turning to face them. Then, a voice came from a speaker on the helicopter.

"Surrender quietly," a female voice said. It wasn't Cissnei, and I didn't recognize it. "If you do, we will assure you your life." My eyes turned back to the infantrymen on the motorcycles, and they were drawing their weapons. They'd been trying to kill me that whole time.

"They're all just doing things as they please..." I scoffed, turning to face the infantrymen. "I don't need an assurance of my life. What I want..." I tightened my grip on the infantry sword and started running, "is freedom!"

I swung my blade in a long arc, slashing both of the men off their bikes. As one of their guns flew through the air, I caught it and started firing at the Turks' helicopter, which quickly turned and started flying away. I was just lucky that it wasn't one of the ones carrying Gatling guns. Even if it was, I doubted that they would have used it. The Turks seemed to be trying to take me alive. I wondered if that was really what Shinra was ordering, or if that was Tseng still trying to hold onto an old friendship.

I sat down on one of the motorcycles and started off, back in the direction of Cloud. I wasn't going to spend my life running, but I wasn't just about to sit back and let Shinra win either.

It was my life, it was my choice, and I chose freedom.


	50. A SOLDIER's Freedom Part 2

**A Heart For My Nobody says:**

**Sorry, sorry, sorry, all you guys! I know for a little bit there it felt like this story had died. I'd never really been more than a week without an update before, and this time was... how long? Like a month?**

**Anyway, I've had a lot of craziness and things going on in my life, not the least of which being my mom in the hospital. Luckily, she's fine and that's all sorted out, but for obvious reasons I wasn't able to post so well for a little while. Hopefully now that I'm back, I can start that whole "semi-weekly" posting thing that I had going for the first 49 chapters. So much love to all those who still stuck with me and who sent me reviews and favorited my story and all that stuff! You guys rock! And to those of you who have reviewed me and not gotten a reply yet, those are on their way. You may not even remember what your reviews said, but hopefully you still appreciate the responses. Sorry again, but it's been pretty crazy here...**

**Enjoy the new chapter!**

* * *

**Cloud**

I heard gunfire as my mind drifted in and out of consciousness. I felt that I was waking up more often, even if I wasn't remembering things too well. My old memories seemed to be coming back piece by piece at least. Modeoheim was clear enough as my first mission as a first class, and whatever happened at Nibelheim was starting to come back as well. At first, there was only the vague idea of fire, then I remembered something about a reactor, and... Jenova. Nibelheim day six had played over in my head a few times, so I knew I was safe then, but there was some feeling of an imminent danger that I couldn't shake. That's when it started to come back to me: Nibelheim day seven.

There was fire everywhere. I'd been out of town by the water when I saw the smoke, and by the time I came back, everything was in flames. The well was burning before me, the inn was lit, and Tifa's house was completely engulfed in fire. I rushed to the house to make sure Tifa was alright, but before I made it there, a body was thrown in my way, covered in blood. I heard a cry come from my left, where the body had flown from, and saw a man silhouetted by the flames, cutting down another innocent. I knew then who it was, and I rushed to try and stop him, but was hit in the head by a falling piece of wood and knocked to the ground. My vision went blurry, and as I tried to remember the killer's name, I woke up.

I was listening to the sound of a motorcycle, and I could see the ground speeding by underneath me. I couldn't recognize the area, but that was no surprise. I could feel myself breathing and blinking, and I could feel the terrain bump me around as I drove. I knew, somehow, that was reality.

"Hey, don't be angry," A voice said in front of me. I knew who it was, but I couldn't place the name. "There's no way I'd ever leave you behind."

My eyes opened again, even though I had no memory of ever shutting them, and I was back in Nibelheim. The town was still on fire, and there were still people screaming, but I was no longer where I was before. I was running by the inn, fleeing the flames, and I stopped next to the burning well. There was the man, ending the screams with a final killing blow from his terrifying sword. The only other SOLDIER first class, Sephiroth stood before me, glaring past the embers. He made no attempt to attack me, but simply turned away and walked through the fire, as though he had some other priority.

I couldn't stand the thought. It took me a long moment to accept that Sephiroth would have done that. He was my childhood hero, and one of the reasons why I joined SOLDIER in the first place. He knew that was my hometown, and there was no reason to kill all those people. What could have possessed him to do that? It didn't matter. No reason could have excused him for that. Everyone was dead, and everything was burned. I even saw the bodies of the infantrymen that had arrived with us, laying still on the ground. Sephiroth had become a monster.

I rushed after him, up the stairs, through the flames, and toward Mt. Nibel. It would end there.

The memories tried to escape me again, and I wished that I would wake up. I knew I was seeing the truth when I was riding the motorcycle. I knew I wanted to be there, and I knew there was someone I wanted to be there with. Everything else was just a big jumble of fragments and lies. I couldn't tell what was a real memory, or what were my real feelings, and every second I could feel that information trying to escape me. Recalling earlier times was easier, so I figured I'd start there. But... hadn't I done that before?

As a child, I felt the cold wind blow by me that night. I was shivering, but I was actually wearing more than Tifa was, so how could she not have been? I climbed to the top of the well, speaking high and mighty things about joining SOLDIER and becoming a hero, and Tifa made me promise her that one day I'd be her knight in shining armor, and rescue her when she was in a pinch. I agreed. There was a shooting star that night.

I was thirteen when I made it to Midgar. I could barely find my way around, even when my destination was the tallest building in the center of the city. Everyone looked down on me, and both the guard at the Shinra building and the girl at the desk laughed when I said I wanted to apply to SOLDIER. They underestimated me because of my age, or they thought I wanted to throw my life away. They never considered that I wanted to become a hero like I thought Sephiroth was. The next day, I went to the entry level exams.

During the exams, I met another young boy a few years older than I was. He had black hair, but I couldn't quite place his name. That boy made it look pretty easy to get through the tests, and he was a large part of how I managed to get through. I remembered he smiled at me and told me that he'd be my hero, but I still couldn't remember his name. It was like there was a big hole in my memory that just refused to heal. Why couldn't I remember his name? Next...

I met the boy again in Midgar. He talked to me about my hometown. It was the first time I'd mentioned Nibelheim since I'd left. He said he was from Gongaga. We climbed to the top of a tall structure and looked down over the city that was our new home. He held my hand, and I held his. That boy never made it into SOLDIER. Next...

Junon, at a diner, I sat with the boy again. He was special to me, important, but I couldn't remember his name even still. When it was time to go, he kept me there just a bit longer. Once again, we climbed to the highest height we could find, just like in the old days. I was fifteen then, but I still wanted to hold his hand. He looked at me, and he spoke about the sky. Then... nothing else happened. No... wait... I couldn't lose that memory. Then... we kissed. Real or fake, we kissed. There was one word that stuck in my head, but it wasn't his name. _Liberating_.

The newer the memory, the harder it was to recall. I was at Coral some time after that, on a mission to defend the reactor. I was staying in the mobile home numbered four, with four other men. I couldn't recall any of their names. Wait... I couldn't have been staying in that mobile home. I was a SOLDIER and the other four were infantrymen. I had my own cabin, but I couldn't remember what it looked like. But... why was I in that home? Oh... right... It was a surprise inspection. The place was a dump, but I let them off easy. Next...

Gold Saucer, the amusement park. Why was I there again? It was something to do with Wutai soldiers left over from the war. They were undercover, and _I_ was supposed to be undercover. I thought I had somebody else with me, but no name came to mind. I remembered that the Turks visited me there. I had a fun time, but I could have sworn that there was somebody else... Oh well. Next...

I went back to Midgar. I was released from the medical wing and went to visit the... no... why would I visit the infantry floor? I... I didn't remember what I did next. Sometime later in the day, Tseng informed me that I'd be going on a new mission... to Nibelheim, with...

I started to remember the earlier days of Nibelheim. I saw Tifa, but I didn't remember if we had talked. I traveled up Mt. Nibel and Tifa was the guide. Me and... someone else... went into the reactor and discovered the source of the problem. I didn't remember what that was. For some reason, it seemed particularly important that Tifa stayed outside. I remembered being carried down the mountain, but then I remembered walking down myself. I... visited my mom. She was happy to see me again. She asked me about SOLDIER and my uniform, but pieces of the conversation were lost among my thoughts. I was on my roof at one point, but the memory ended there. Next...

Next there were flames, and I was running. The final memory I was trying to recall came back to me all at once. I ran up the stairs, through the flames, and toward Mt. Nibel after Sephiroth. It would end there. I wasn't going to let him get away with what he'd done, or what he planned on doing. I cut down the monsters on my way up the mountain, crossing the bridges and kicking up rocks behind me. Tifa's father laid quiet and still in the shadow of the reactor, and the door was broken open. When I rushed inside, Tifa was there as well, collapsed on the ground. I ran to her, but I could see that she was still breathing. Anger built up inside me and I continued up the stairs to a door that was marked by the word: JENOVA. Something was off about the stairs. There was something unsettling, like something I knew I should have seen, but I didn't. I had no time to worry about that, however, and continued.

Sephiroth was in that room, arms raised and talking to a figure inside a tube. He was calling it mother, and talking about some plan he had. I didn't remember his words, but I didn't need to. I had the Buster Sword. That was... was that my weapon? I gripped the sword tightly in my hands, and took a step forward.

"Sephiroth!" I yelled, and he slowly lowered his arms, turning to face me. Then, he drew that terrible blade, and held it as firm as I held mine. It seemed like we stared at each other forever. Rage built in me, and he simply looked on as though I meant nothing to him, as though none of that meant anything to him at all. My memories flashed before my eyes, but I couldn't make it past that point. Then, I woke back up to the present day.

I was still on the motorcycle, and now it was dark, like I was in a cave or a tunnel. I could hear the hum of the motor, and feel someone in front of me. He was warm, and I knew who he was, but I still couldn't remember his name. Obviously, I defeated Sephiroth that day, but I couldn't remember anything since. I must have been injured, and I thought I knew who was looking after me. No... I _did_ know...

But why couldn't I just remember his name...?


	51. A SOLDIER's Freedom Part 3

**Zack **

I slowed my motorcycle to a stop close by where I had left Cloud. It seemed that all but two of the infantrymen had left to pursue me, and the last two were still trying to remove my sword from the ground to get to Cloud, or at least one of them was trying and the other was barking orders. Neither of them looked up as I started walking over. Finally, I heard a gasp as I passed one of them by, slamming the head of the working one against the pillar where Cloud was stuck. The other took a step away.

"Y-You're... Zack...!" he said, and I still didn't even turn to face him. With one pull, I yanked the Buster Sword up out of the ground and returned it to my back, then crouched down to talk to Cloud.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, Cloud." I smiled and Cloud made a small noise. Finally, I heard the man behind me start to take out a weapon, and I spun around, knocking him out with a single punch. Then, I looked back to Cloud and started helping him up onto the back of the new bike. "I got us a new ride." I gestured as I sat in front of him and positioned his arms around me. "Unfortunately, it doesn't have an extra seat, so you'll have to hold onto me."

I started the bike back up and we were out of there, down the bit of road that Shinra had created.

"Hey, don't be angry," I said, glancing back at him as I drove. "There's no way I'd ever leave you behind." I looked back further with a smile, taking note of the Turk helicopter on our trail. It didn't matter anymore, I thought, skidding down the road toward the pass under the mountains. There was no way that they'd be following us down there. "See ya later!" I waved back to them, and shortly they were out of sight.

The underground pass was a pretty simple idea. It was a road that led straight from the Junon side of the mountains to the Midgar side, pretty much directly into the city. I thought it was a sure thing that we'd make it into Midgar by following the tunnel, but there were two things that I failed to consider: that the tunnel was really, really long, and that the motorcycle was getting short on gas. We made it about half way through before the engine started smoking and we came to a halt.

"No!" I said, stepping off the bike and kicking it in the side. I sighed and hung my head. "Walking this thing will take forever!" Then, I noticed a bit of light shining on the ground, and followed it up to see a hole in the ceiling, leading to ground level. I dragged the bike until it was underneath the hole, picked Cloud up and rested him over my shoulder, and slowly stood up on top of the thing. It was a little bit of a jump up, but I knew that if I could get at least one hand on the ledge, we could climb out of there.

"Hold on," I said to Cloud, and then I bent down like I would when I exercised, and jumped into the air with all my might. Stretching my arm, I grabbed at the ceiling by the hole. It was hot from the sunlight up above, but I managed to keep my grip. I pushed Cloud up first, and then climbed up through the hole myself, and we found ourselves in a grassland. "Pretty lucky, huh?" I said, panting and gesturing to the hole. "We're almost there. Let's see if we can find a road."

Sure enough, after a little while of walking, Cloud and I came to a road, and started to traverse down it in the direction of Midgar. I smiled at Cloud, and he was blinking more often now. About a half-hour later, the sun was starting to get to me.

"There's a farm down the other side of the road, or so I hear," I said, feeling the pavement, rough beneath my boots. "I hear they have chocobos there." I slowed to a stop, catching my breath. "Are you still afraid of chocobos?" I laughed a little, but I was startled when the sound of a car horn beeped behind us.

Slowly, I turned around expecting to see a Shinra vehicle, but it wasn't one. There was a small, dull yellow truck that came to a stop on the road. The driver was a middle-aged man that looked a bit like a farmer himself, and he peeked his head out of the window to shout to us.

"You kids all right?" he asked, and I stepped a little closer. "Do you need a ride?"

"Really?" I asked, getting more excited than I felt I should be. "That would be great! But... I don't have anything to pay you with..."

"Well, you don't have to worry about it, as long as you're alright with sitting in the back," he assured me, gesturing to the flatbed on the back of his truck. "Your friend don't look too good."

"He's getting better," I said, helping Cloud onto the back of the truck and then climbing up myself. "Thanks again for this. We owe you." The car started to drive, and I sat Cloud up against the back. "Another lucky break, huh?" I said, smiling at him. "Maybe our luck's starting to turn around."

The truck continued to drive for a long ways. I supposed we were a bit further from Midgar than I originally thought. I was sitting with my back against the wall of the flatbed near Cloud, my head leaned back so that the sun could warm my face, and I felt the first real bit of peace that I'd felt in a while. It was nice, sitting there with Cloud, resting our legs, knowing that he was getting better. It was all just... nice. I knew I'd run into a lot of trouble in Midgar, but that didn't matter to me at that moment. That moment was... secluded. It was its own moment, and it was nice.

I turned my eyes to look at Cloud, watching him shift slightly when the truck ran over a bump. The driver was playing guitar music on the radio up front. I crawled a little closer to Cloud and put my hand on his shoulder.

"Ugh..." he said, and his eyes blinked a few times. I smiled and took a deep breath. I had something I needed to get off my chest.

"I... uh, I'm sorry," I said, lowering my head a little to meet his eyes. "I'm sorry for running into you back at Shinra." I leaned back, looking at the sky. "You know... when I broke your helmet?" Cloud said nothing as I looked back down to him, and I laughed. "I've been trying to apologize for that for a while now. You'd probably say it isn't a big deal, but..." I shifted again, staring down at my feet. "I just never know what's going to happen next, and I wanted you to know that." The car bumped again and I looked back at Cloud with a smile, trying to change my thought process. "We'll be okay."

The car continued to drive for a good distance. Eventually the grassland ground began to change to the rocky, beige terrain that marked the distant outskirts of Midgar. I was doing squats on the vehicle while I waited, but after yet another bump, I walked back to the end of the flatbed and bent down to talk to Cloud again.

"Hey... What are we doing once we reach Midgar?" I asked, cocking my head at him. He said nothing, and I hung my head in thought for a moment. "Well, first of all, we need to get some money, huh?" I twisted myself around to shout back to the front of the car. "Hey pops, do you know any work that I might be able to do?"

"What are you saying?" he said back from the front, but it didn't sound like a real question. "You need to try out everything while you're still young." I leaned my head back to better hear him as he continued. "Go through all the hardships while you're still young, and eventually you'll find the best path for you." I looked back to Cloud with a puzzled expression.

"_Everything_, so he says." I moved Cloud a little so that he was better sat up against the wall. "Not much of a help, huh?" I stood up and started to do squats again, but after just a few, an idea popped into my head and I turned back to face Cloud. "Wait, I've got it! I have a lot of knowledge and skills that other people don't have, right?" I clenched my fist shut in front of my chest, a big grin spreading across my face. "All right, I've made up my mind! I'll open up a business that does everything!"

"Hey, you..." the driver called back. "Were you listening to a word I just said?" I was too excited to answer him.

"Troublesome things, boring things, and dangerous things..." I listed off ideas as I paced in the truck. "I'm going to do everything depending on the reward. People in Midgar always wanted me to do stuff for them as a SOLDIER, so I'll make a fortune!" I stopped pacing, turning my head to Cloud with a smirk. "Hey, Cloud... What are _you_ going to do?"

Cloud made another small noise, and the car bumped him a bit again. I laughed and walked over to sit next to him, putting my arm over his shoulder and smiling.

"I'm just kidding." I held my head down again to look at his eyes, watching the mako swirl about. "You know I wouldn't just abandon you like that." Leaning in, I rested my forehead against his, and for the first time in a while, I could feel him breathing against me. "We're friends, right?"

Suddenly, a loud noise sounded and sparks flew up from the side of the truck. I shielded my eyes, and when I looked back, I could see that there was a bullet hole.

"What was that!" the driver yelled, speeding up the truck. "Are you two fugitives or something!"

"Just let us out over there!" I shouted, lowering Cloud's head down and moving to the front of the flatbed. The truck screeched to a stop near a large rock formation, and I pulled Cloud out from the back.

"I don't know who you are..." the driver said as I dragged Cloud over to the cover of the rocks, "but godspeed to you." With that, the truck sped off, throwing gravel and rocks up into the air as it went.

Confident that we were, for the moment, out of harms way, I rested Cloud up against the large rock. He made another noise, and I stared at him for a long moment. I could see Midgar in the distance if I tried. We were almost there, which also meant that Shinra was probably getting desperate. Once I got inside the city, there would be no convincing anyone that I was dead. I'd be able to get a new start... Cloud would be able to get a new start. One final obstacle, and that nightmare that I dragged him into would finally be over. I grinned at him, and put my hand in his hair one last time.

Cloud's head was warm, and his hair was soft. Even then, he looked so peaceful. It was probably that peace of his that had gotten me that far. I knew, if I made it through all of that, I would make it my purpose to make that up to him. I ruffled his hair with my hand, trying to hold back the other emotions that I was feeling. We _would_ make it through this. We had to.

I stood up, taking Cloud in, taking in all of him, and slowly turned away in the direction the shots were fired from. This was it, I was sure of it: my final stand against Shinra, and my fight for freedom. We would make it, I kept telling myself... we would make it. I took a final deep breath and started to walk.

I was ready for bullets as soon as I turned the corner and walked out into the open space between the rock-ledges, but there were none fired. The first click of an armed gun sounded as I took a few last steps, looking over the infantrymen that stood ready before me. Kunsel had mentioned to me that Shinra had called in an entire battalion to find me. _That_ was an understatement. In front of me, there had to be at least a hundred infantrymen, arranged on several levels of the rocks, almost like a firing squad. Every gun was trained on me, and several infantry helicopters circled by overhead. It was a small army, just for one SOLDIER and an injured infantryman.

"Boy oh boy..." I said, placing my hands on my hips and shaking my head. Many of those men had probably served under me at one point, and even more of them probably looked up to me, at least as a SOLDIER first class. They weren't going to make the first move. To them, they'd just about caught me already. I was sure that none of them expected me to fight back, or at least they were hoping I wouldn't. I looked directly at them, turning serious, the beat of my heart already starting to pick up. "The price of freedom is steep."

Slowly, I raised my arm through the air, watching as every eye followed my movements. I gripped the hilt of the Buster Sword, letting my hand close tightly before moving again. Holding the blade up in front of me with both hands, I drew it in close to my head, shutting my eyes and reminding myself to breath. Angeal had taught me to hold the sword that way when I needed to focus, and I held it the same way when I gave my first speech as a first class SOLDIER. I knew it meant something to the men who stood ready with their guns. I pitied them in a way, still working for a company that would lie to them and tell them that the ones they once looked up to were now traitors, and that their new orders were to execute those very people. I was in that situation once. That's why, for so long, I wanted to believe that Angeal was not my enemy... and he wasn't. I took another deep breath.

"Embrace your dreams," I said, eyes still shut, pulse still picking up. "And, whatever happens, protect your honor..." I opened my eyes again, slowly, moving the sword away from me and readying my body for what was about to come, "as SOLDIER!" I started to run forward at the army, noticing every man who took a fearful step back or hesitated to shoot. Raising my sword, I shouted: "Come and get it!" and finally the first shot was fired, reflecting off the metal of the blade.

The Buster Sword swung in a wide arc, hitting two men and throwing one of them into another. Gunshots sounded off around me as I dashed from one man to another, striking down soldiers faster than I could count. Most of the guns closest to me went off just a second too late, firing to the side as its owner hit the ground. I yelled, spinning my blade into a crowd of men. Bullets passed right by my face, one of them tearing the shirt of my uniform, just above the skin. I turned in the direction of the shots, throwing bolts of lightning from the materia I drew between steps, and ran my elbow into the stomach of the closest man.

A bullet tore through the fabric of my pants, grazing the surface of my leg, another on my lower arm. The scratches burned, but they didn't slow me down. I felt the rush of so much movement around me, and I felt the pressure of every strike of my blade downing man after man. I cut through the rock wall as I took a group of three infantrymen, and an image of Sephiroth popped into my mind when the gash in the rock burned a fiery red. I remembered when he fought the dragon on the way to Nibelheim. That beast seemed so strong, and I was so impressed, but it didn't seem like anything compared to this. I remembered his killing blow and knocked another soldier from his feet, taking a bullet along the side of the chest.

Cissnei had impressed me a few times too. It was true that part of it was the fact that I hadn't really ever seen a girl fight before, but it was more than that. I would never have said anything to her, but for a time, I thought she was better than me. I supposed that was what came with being a Turk. I rushed into another man, pushing him into a rock wall and throwing him at another soldier firing from the left. Thinking about the Turks just brought my mind to Tseng. I really wondered what Tseng was up to. I didn't know if he ever thought the same about me, but I always considered him a good friend, because I thought I saw the other thoughts behind that stiff face of his. I wondered if he was really trying to capture me, or if he was still on my side.

I dove away from a missile shot from a helicopter, and the rocks behind me blew up into dust. I didn't know why there had to be sides like that. I didn't understand why Shinra had to pit friend against friend just to keep from looking bad, or why Sephiroth had to betray us all without as much as an explanation. Why weren't people entitled to the truth? It was hard enough to sort things out when you knew what was going on. I knocked an infantryman off his feet, and the lightning materia was shot out of my hand, rolling down the rocks. As my eyes were drawn to the materia, another missile hit the rocks nearby and threw me threw the air. I rolled across the ground and back to my feet, but not fast enough to dodge a series of bullets that struck the armor on my left shoulder. The impact of the the bullets on the metal threw me off balance and caused a ringing in my ear, but I kept moving.

I used the sharp end of the Buster Sword as I cut my way through another crowd. It was hard to remind myself to do that when it was necessary. Even past the problems I had with harming people I used to work with, I kept remembering Angeal's words about wear and tear. Had Shinra not forced friends on separate sides like they did, I never would have struck Angeal down like I did. I held on for years, hoping that he'd come back, but after Lazard came back as a copy, that hope died. I always thought that I couldn't live with Angeal's death on my conscience, but in the end, I knew that he understood. Knowing Angeal, he probably wouldn't have let me get away with it happening any differently.

If Angeal hadn't joined Genesis, I never would have ended up where I was when I fell through the roof of that church in the slums. I thought I'd died when I woke to see Aerith's face, and when I heard her words. Either I though that, or I used that as some kind of strange come-on. It would have taken a girl like Aerith to accept the offer of a date after I broke her roof and crushed her flowers. She grew the only flowers in Midgar, or at least in the slums. I yelled as a bullet shot directly into my leg, and another reflected off the armor on the other shoulder. Blood poured out onto the ground, but I felt that I could still move the leg. I gripped the wound tight and dove out of the way of another spray of bullets, wincing under the pain of my landing. I took that opportunity to strike down the closest few infantrymen who were scrambling to reload their guns.

"Agh!" I yelled again when I bullet pierced my arm from behind, and I fell to my knees. Attacking as I turned around, I took down the shooter and another man behind him. The amount of infantrymen in the area was going down considerably, but any hesitation they had about firing at me was long gone. I spun back the other way at the sound of bullets, guarding against the attack with my sword, and drew the summon materia from my pocket. Ifrit burst from the ground, pulling flames out of the earth with him, and flew up into the sky, shooting down a helicopter in a ball of hellfire. He turned to the infantrymen, but vanished as my other arm took a bullet and the materia went flying.

I grimaced, letting the tip of the Buster Sword drop to the ground, but returning both hands to the hilt. Panting, I looked up to see the remaining infantrymen walking in my direction, and another helicopter flying by just overhead. They could tell I was getting weaker. I knew that, because they weren't even aiming their guns as they got closer. I may have taken a few bullets, but I was _not_ just going to give up. I raised the sword back off the ground and clenched my teeth at the men. They halted, exchanging glances with each other, and turned their guns back on me.

I stumbled forward, feeling my leg giving out from the blood loss, and yelled as I swung my sword. I hit one of the men, but barely, and another simply back-stepped to avoid a second attack. I reached to get my materia, but found nothing, and one of the men shot me again in the chest. My head rang, and my vision turned white at the edges for a moment. Stumbling back, all I could think about was Cloud. It was a strange sensation, and I knew I should have been focusing, but Cloud was so clear in my mind. When I ran into him in the hall, when he told me he was a country boy too... when we were on his roof and he couldn't seem to stop thanking me. I missed talking to Cloud. It wasn't something I thought I should have been thinking about then, but I missed him, and I hoped over anything else that he was safe. A little smile met the corners of my mouth as the three soldiers before me raised their guns in unison, exchanging a final glance. I fell under a barrage of bullets.

I forced myself to breathe again, pained as my body pulsed against the ground. All I could see were the dark clouds that passed by overhead. It looked like a storm. Then, one of the infantrymen stepped into my line of sight, looking down over me. I couldn't move anymore. I couldn't fight anymore. I supposed... I was never really meant to get that freedom. The soldier armed his gun, and I could only hear myself breathing heavily as he paused, looking like he was fighting with his own thoughts. I wanted to tell him that it was okay, and that he didn't have to listen to Shinra. I wanted to say that he didn't have to let those people control his life like that, but I couldn't get myself to speak. Finally, he turned the barrel of his gun to me, averting his eyes. It was the shame of working for Shinra. He couldn't even look at me.

My body arched at the final bullet, feeling it cut through me and into the rock below. Everything went quiet, and as my vision began to fade, I saw Cloud again. I saw him that last time I'd been with him before the fight, when I just put my fingers in his hair and smiled. I was... never going to make it back to him... was I...? It... didn't matter... as long as he was all right... it didn't matter... He would be... he would be okay...

Rain started to fall from the sky, and I could see Aerith smiling. I could see Angeal too... and I could still see Cloud. I wondered if Cloud would ever end up meeting Aerith. I wondered what he would say about me. Would he say... I became a hero? Would he remember everything we went through? I wanted to remind him... _exactly_ what we had been through. I wanted him to know... that it was okay... that he'd be okay. I wanted to tell him... that even if we didn't see each other... that I could be with him... always. I wanted him... to understand.


	52. A SOLDIER's Freedom Part 4

**NOTE: This chapter and chapter 53 have been posted at the same time. Read this one first, but make sure you catch chapter 53 as well.**

* * *

**Cloud**

He... touched my hair and turned away. That was the only thing I remembered at that moment, I thought. I... couldn't feel everything, but I could feel his hand on my head... warm, and lingering. Everything was too bright, or too dark, but I could see him a little. I could see him staring at me, smiling, but not really smiling. He looked worried, or discomforted by something, like he had that feeling you get in your chest and your throat when you know something awful has happened, or will happen; a tense pulling or pushing, when it becomes difficult to breathe. He had that feeling, the black-haired boy, and I had it too.

He was grown up now, and I knew what I was seeing was not a memory. There was no safety in the back of my mind, no assurance that what was happening had already happened, and nothing could go any more wrong than it already had. Maybe my mind had become a retreat, I thought; a place where I didn't have to worry about becoming anything, or impressing anyone, or protecting anyone, or holding them when they needed it. So much fear came with living in the present, so much responsibility, and so much room for failure. Everything had felt like it failed. I couldn't remember anything too clearly, overwhelmed by the dampness of the air, and the reality of what I was seeing... _who_ I was seeing. All I knew was how it felt; like my body was broken, like my life was over, and like the one thing that I had left was turning away from me for the final time.

I watched his back. I watched his shoulders rise and fall with a deep breath. I felt the hair on the top of my head, gently shifting and standing back up where his hand had rested. I blinked, and I could feel it. I knew I had been blinking before, but I really felt it that time. I felt the eyelid close as though I were the one who did it, and not as though I was seeing out of a foreign body. I had felt my hair too, and thinking about it, I realized that I could feel the rock underneath me, and I could recognize the water in the air. My muscles tensed when I tensed them. I could move again, so I tried so hard to. I lifted my hand like a weight, slowly into the air, reaching for the man that I couldn't remember the name of. He was so close, but he couldn't see me. I felt my lips part, and tried to remember how to speak, but no words could leave my mouth. He walked away then, even as my hand continued to reach for him, and disappeared into the blinding sun.

I didn't remember if I was conscious after that. I heard gunshots. I had heard many gunshots. I didn't know whether the sounds were real or not. Something dripped on my wrist at one point, water maybe, then on the top of my head, and on my right leg. It was rain. One last gunshot echoed, disturbing the quiet that had finally fell over me. Then there were voices, vague and quiet, getting closer. My eyes opened, and I could see the boots of a familiar uniform on a man who walked up to me, but everything was still a bit blurry.

"I found the other one," I heard a voice say, and more footsteps sounded behind it. "What do you want to do with him?" There was a very long silence after that, only broken by the shifting of boots on the dampened rocks.

"Just leave him there..." another voice said, his tone less than happy. The first voice protested.

"But... sir..."

"He's been poisoned by mako, he's not gonna go anywhere." There was another silence and more shifting before the man spoke again. "We've done enough here. Come on... let's go."

There was more shifting, more footsteps, and then silence. The only sound that followed after that was the rain picking up and breaking on the rocks, and I drifted into a sort of daze. When I focused again, it was on my hand laying by my left side. I could move the fingers on it now, and I watched as I slowly raised my arm up again, like when I reached for... him. He... hadn't come back yet. I remembered that, somewhere, sometime, he told me that he would never abandon me. I believed him, but... he hadn't come back. I needed to find him.

I forced more of my body to move, shifting my torso for the first time. I dropped down on my arms, barely holding my head off of the rocks over a puddle. My reflection stared back at me, weakly, and I noticed a difference with my eyes. There was mako floating around there. They weren't just blue anymore, but a sort of blue-green with a glow. I didn't know why it felt so strange to me. I didn't know why those men said I was poisoned by mako either, but that wasn't important at the time. I put pressure on my arms, holding myself up on them and raising my head. Rain fell before my eyes, and I blinked and twitched my head a bit in surprise when it dripped off my bangs.

The sky had gotten darker with the clouds, but it still took my eyes a minute to adjust, and when they did, I could see the body of a man laying out in the rain by the edge of a cliff. Along side the man, clasped in his hand, laid a large, familiar sword. I knew who that was. It was... him. I couldn't... lose that memory... I knew his name... I had to know his name. I forced my arms to move again, and started to drag myself along the ground. Slowly, but surely, I approached him. There were many pieces of broken rocks, weapons, and helmets everywhere. Blood mixed with the rain in the puddles around him. As I crawled, my hand brushed the fabric of his pants, and it stopped me in place. Just the smallest touch brought reality closer to me, and I found it hard to raise my head to look at him. With a few last breaths, I pulled myself up closer to his chest and pushed up higher off the ground so that I could see him. He was hurt, and there was blood running down his face, but his eyes were open. I... I needed... I needed to know his name. I needed to say his name.

"Z-Zack..." I felt every movement of my mouth pronouncing the name, and my brain rushing with it. His body twitched, and his eyes flicked as he made a small, pained noise. Then, he exhaled, and the corners of his mouth turned up when his eyes found me. He stared into my eyes, and I wanted to know what he was thinking, and I wanted to hear him talk. He took another breath.

"For the... both of us..." he said gently, keeping his smile. It looked difficult for him to keep his eyes focused, and I felt mine dart between them.

"Both of us?" I repeated, the words coming out quietly in the rain. He continued to stare in silence for a moment, then carefully nodded his head.

"That's right..." He blinked slowly, and his arm started to move. "You're gonna..."

"You're gonna..." I repeated the words again, and his hand reached up to touch the back of my head. He held his hand in my hair again, and pulled my head down to rest on his chest.

"Live." I felt his chest move with the breath of the word. I felt his warmth, and the comfort I'd been wanting to feel for so long. I felt everything I didn't want to lose. I wanted to do anything to hold him, to keep him there, to never let him go. "You'll be..." he whispered, and I could feel his arm shaking as he held on, "my living legacy."

His fingers ran through my hair as his arm fell back down to the cold stone by his side. His breath was heavier now, and I slowly lifted myself back off his chest. There was blood in my hair, and on my cheek... his blood. His blood was everywhere... and he was still smiling. Slowly, he turned his head to the hand that still gripped the Buster Sword.

"My honor, my dreams," he said, slowly pulling the sword from a puddle and holding it up to me. I stared at the hilt and his hand as he spoke, and his face turned serious. "They're yours now."

I sat back and reached my hand up to take the hilt, feeling my glove close gently around it. His hand stayed, but as I raised my other to take his, it fell, and I took the sword in both. I pulled the sword closer to me, and I felt the tips of his fingers brush against me as they fell back to the ground.

"I'm your... living legacy..." he was smiling again, but my heart dropped as his eyes began to close. I watched him, trying to speak, and waiting for him to look at me again. The rain fell, and Zack was still, and my breath was heavy in my lungs. Zack didn't open his eyes again, and I knew he wouldn't. Everything in my life was gone. The pressure built inside me as I turned my eyes up to the sky, and to the rain. I couldn't take it anymore, I had to let go. So I screamed. I screamed with all my might, and my dreams, and my fears, and with everything that went wrong or right. I screamed with every betrayal, every kiss, and every touch of the hand, every promise, every smile, and every day I'd worked so hard in my life. I screamed with everything, and the rain continued to fall.

I watched the sky for hours, I watched Zack for hours, and eventually the rain had stopped, the sun looked out from behind the clouds, and I could feel its warmth. The blood had washed away from Zack, and even then he was smiling. Zack used to say... embrace your dreams. If you want to be a hero, you need to have dreams. Everything in my life was not gone. I had at least one thing... my dreams... _Zack's_ dreams... and as long as I held onto those, I could hold onto him, and my life wouldn't be over. I looked over him as the sun shined down on us, and I felt a smile for the first time in a long time. Zack gave me one more chance to live... one more chance to have dreams.

"Thank you," I said, holding myself together, breathing in the air again. "I won't forget." I shut my eyes and stood up, letting the strength come back to my legs, and finally looked down on the man who changed my life, one last time. I wasn't able to save him like he had saved me, but I was going to leave those weaknesses behind. I would live life... for the both of us.

"Good night..." I said, turning away and facing the open sky. "Zack." I took the hilt of the sword again in both hands, holding it as tightly as I shut my eyes, and then set off to a new life, never looking back.


	53. A Turk's Loyalty

**NOTE: THIS CHAPTER WAS POSTED AT THE SAME TIME AS CHAPTER 52. PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU HAVE READ CHAPTER 52 FIRST.**

* * *

**Tseng**

Tseng, head of the Department of Administrative Research, alias Turks. This was the final, closing report on the Nibelheim incident, year 0007.

Our department was issued an order to pursue two research samples that had escaped from a Shinra facility. The samples were two fully grown males. One of them was an expert in combat, who was once ranked as a SOLDIER first class...

I placed my pen down gently against the edge of the report, standing up from behind the desk and focusing myself. It was oddly difficult to continue my report past that point. I had been involved with those two individuals, the targets, ever since that incident that occurred approximately five years ago. I took a sip from a cup of black coffee and turned to the window overlooking a small empty street and a bridge that a train was passing under at the time.

I had never regretted following my orders to pursue the targets. The only regret I had was that I hadn't found them first. When the order was issued to the Turks, it was sent to the army as well. It seemed evident that at least certain members of the infantry had qualms about the Turks and the special missions we received. Due to the nature of some of those missions, the infantry believed that we were taking jobs from them and earning more money to do so. That order hadn't been the first time that the army had tried to best the Turks, but as fate would have it, it was the first time that they succeeded at it.

I took another sip from the coffee and turned back to the desk to flip through the previous pages in the report, scanning the names and photos of the operatives involved. I had called a meeting back when I read the order, to inform every member of the Turks about our duty to track the escaped samples; Zack Fair and Cloud Strife. However, against the directives I'd received, I told them all to bring the targets back alive. Every Turk, although under the employment of Shinra, had more loyalty to the department than to the company, and I had loyalties of my own. I wasn't comfortable with letting the company execute a friend who hadn't even committed a crime.

The Turks split into groups and took helicopters to various locations around the Midgar area, where the targets had been last sighted. There was a point at which two operatives of the Turks made contact with Zack Fair. He appeared to be alone, and fled the area on a stolen motorcycle. Shortly afterward, he disappeared into the underground passageway that would have taken him directly into Midgar. Several operatives took point in the tunnels ahead and at the various exits, but none made further contact with the target. Later investigation showed that he may have escaped the tunnel through a damaged portion of the ceiling.

I touched my pen back down to the paper, scrawling the next line of the report before retaking my seat. As I considered my actions back on that day, I knew there was nothing I could have done any differently. I had units stationed at every likely position to find Zack, and helicopters keeping eyes on the grasslands and rocky mountains. Zack, however, lived up to his name as a SOLDIER first class and managed to continue to elude both the Turks and the Shinra army alike; that is, until that final hour. I turned my eyes down and continued to write.

At approximately twenty past two in the afternoon, the army reported Zack Fair's position in the hills just outside Midgar. He had hitchhiked a ride with an unknowing civilian arriving from the farms near Kalm. The civilian took no direct damage from gunfire, but the truck in his possession may have been damaged. It was at that time that Zack Fair abandoned the vehicle and took cover in the rocks, revealing himself moments later. As reported by the army, Zack resisted arrest and became hostile, therefore return fire was necessary. I placed the pen down and held it firmly against the table, fighting against my own anger toward the army and their pettiness. It was in the order that if the army were to locate Zack Fair, they were to report his position and keep a lock on him until the Turks arrived. It was only as a last resort that gunfire was supposed to be used on a SOLDIER that close to the city, but as I understood it, it was the army that acted first. However, since Zack's escape from the Nibelheim facility and even the very fact that he was alive was at that time top secret information, there were no questions nor punishments for this deviation from orders. As it was, the army open-fired on Zack Fair, and he fought back. It hadn't been long after the report on Zack's position when I climbed into a helicopter and started out myself, but by the time that I arrived, I was too late. I slowly touched the tip of the pen back down on the page. The wounds sustained by ex-SOLDIER first class, Zack Fair, during his resist, were reported fatal. This was the final report and the closing of the case-file on the Nibelheim incident, and Zack's death had been registered both publicly and officially.

Eyes shut, I closed the file with the palm of my hand, standing again from my seat. When I opened my eyes, they found the bundle of letters I still kept at my desk. They were from her, the one I told Zack that I would look after, the one I'd been looking after for years. Eighty-eight letters, containing everything she wanted to say to him but couldn't. It brought me pain to resist telling Aerith that Zack was alive. As she watched the years pass by, she continued to wait for him, always knowing that he hadn't given up on her. I never knew how she knew, but Aerith never suspected anything other than that Zack was in trouble. I heard her pray for him as I watched sometimes. Sometimes it was prayer, and sometimes it was almost like a conversation. One time, I heard her say something about a boy, and how she wished she could have met him. It was always very strange to watch Aerith, because she spent most of her time alone, but she would still talk, and she never seemed too unhappy. Though even through her smile, I had seen her cry.

My attention was drawn away from the letters as the door to the room came open. I knew who it was who walked in, even before I saw his red hair. Even many of the higher-ups in Shinra would have had the courtesy to knock, but such manner generally escaped Reno. He was dressed his usual way, jacket open and shirt loose a few buttons. Reno always carried himself in a way that seemed very unfit for a Turk, rather clumsily and prone to letting his emotions get the better of him. However, he was very good at his job, and he was very loyal. He turned his eyes to me after a quick glance over the room, putting one hand up to greet me before resting it on the back of his neck.

"Hey, boss," he said, pointing his arm towards the desk. "Finally finishing that report?"

"Yes." I nodded my head, taking my hand off the binder. "I've just written the last of it."

"Whew." Reno sighed, taking a few more steps in my direction. "That has _got_ to be the longest time you've ever taken to finish a job." I shook my head.

"Not the longest." I looked back to the letters on the desk, and I really wasn't sure if Reno knew what I was talking about, but he said nothing else about it. Just a moment later, Reno's common partner in the Turks, Rude, came into the room, and I _would_ have expected him to knock.

"Rude!" Reno laughed a bit, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "I thought you were still sulking over that poker game?" Rude made a noise like a grunt, adjusting his sunglasses and turning his head to me.

"Guess who woke up?" he said, and Reno stopped snickering. I had to admit, my heart felt like it jumped a bit too when I heard his words, for they were not what I expected.

I said nothing, but moved past Reno and Rude and into the next room over. It was a bit of a crude set-up: not too much space, a couch and a table pushed into a corner together, and cards scattered over the floor in what was presumably a poker game gone sour. The room had one window, but the shades were closed at all times. I looked on at the last thing in the room, a small hospital bed accompanied by some basic supplies, and the man laying on top, who smiled back at me.

"It's nice to finally see you again," I said, finding a smile of my own. "Good-morning, Zack."


	54. A SOLDIER's Alliance Part 1

**Cloud**

I won't forget.

Cloud, SOLDIER first class. No, I was an Ex-SOLDIER now. Shinra had betrayed me, and they nearly killed me before I made it back to Midgar, but I _did_ make it back. I was pretty injured when I found my way into the city, and had to collapse by a small train station not too far in. It was risky to be out in the open, but it was less likely that Shinra would be looking for me _inside_ the city, especially in the slums. It turned out that I was right, and sitting there just so happened to be a good idea after all. It wasn't too long after I stopped to rest, as I remembered it, that someone very unexpected came up to me. I heard a voice, and then felt a tap on my shoulder. The voice repeated itself.

"Cloud...?" It was Tifa, my childhood friend. I hadn't seen or heard from her in over four years; not since the disaster back at my hometown, which I tried not to think about too often. There wasn't any way that being stuck on the past would fix anything. I knew who was at fault, and that was all that mattered at that point. Tifa, however, did make those memories come back. It was an unpleasant sensation, but at the same time I was glad to see her. Before then, I hadn't even known that she had made it out of there alive, never mind the fact that she'd moved to the city.

Once we'd gotten to talking, Tifa filled me in on a few of the details in her life since that day. She'd been taken to Midgar by her old mentor so that a good doctor could see to her injuries, and she recovered pretty quickly. After that, she opened up a business; a small bar in the Sector Seven slums. She was holding her own pretty well, despite having to survive under the plate above, but living constantly boxed in by the rotting walls of the Shinra Electric Power Company's home city wasn't sitting too well with her. She hadn't, couldn't, and wouldn't forgive Shinra for what they had done to Nibelheim. That's when she met AVALANCHE.

AVALANCHE was a small but effective anti-Shinra group that the company had labeled as terrorists. The group was run by a burly muscle-head named Barret, and consisted solely of him and three other members at the time. When they met Tifa, they were without a hideout, and constantly on the run. I had no idea whether it was her kind nature or hatred for Shinra that made her do it, but Tifa offered to join AVALANCHE and house them in her bar, so naturally the group agreed. That was all before Tifa came to me, but the more she told me about it, the more it sounded like an opportunity. I didn't really care about AVALANCHE or their leader or anything, but I had already decided that I was going to try and get a job doing pretty much anything for money, and being a mercenary for a terrorist group wasn't beyond my standards at that point, especially if it meant helping Tifa out a bit after all those years.

So that was where I found myself; kneeling on the top of a speeding train, readying myself for an ambush on the very people I used to work with. I hadn't been filled in too much about what we were going to do, but it didn't really matter much to me. I trusted Tifa not to have thrown me into a pack of _complete_ psychos, and as long as I was getting paid, I didn't mind finally doing some damage back to my old, back-stabbing employers. I crouched down a little lower on the train as it slowed into the station, checking the materia I'd equipped into the new accessory Tifa gave me for my wrist. It had been a while since I'd used any magic, as I usually preferred to fight up close with my sword, but I never knew when it might come in handy.

The brakes on the train screeched, and it jerked to a stop. I counted a couple of seconds and jumped off the car, down onto the pavement of the station. The bulky leader was there waiting for me, and the other members of AVALANCHE were running ahead, having already dispatched the only two guards. At least they worked fast, I figured. Maybe they'd even be able to keep up with _me_ once I'd gotten into the action. I straightened myself out, returning a stare to the leader to break his silence.

"C'mon, newcomer," he said, waving his right arm. I quickly toke note that his hand on that arm was replaced by a Gatling-gun; probably the point he was trying to emphasize to me. "Follow me!" He started running in the direction of the other three members. He was doing one of two things, I decided: he was either trying to be helpful in showing the way, or he was trying to make the point that he was in charge. Given his natural disposition, I assumed the second, but either way I knew where I was supposed to be going, and could probably have gotten there faster than the rest of them if I'd wanted to. Instead, I took the time to relieve one of the unconscious guards of one of his medical supplies: a potion for quickly healing minor injuries, which was pretty standard-issue for guards like them.

As I moved to follow the leader, a couple infantrymen ran right out into the station from the side. Judging by their startled expressions and the fact that there was only two of them, I was willing to bet that they were only responding to the sounds of the disturbance. It felt a bit strange to fight a couple of infantrymen when I still had such recent memories of being close to them, but if I had let them go then they would have only shown up in more significant numbers, and I still didn't need a sighting of me to be reported just yet, not when I wouldn't just be jumbled in with AVALANCHE as a whole. Both men were dropped before they could hit me with their panicked spray of bullets. My own strength almost felt foreign to me as I swished the Buster Sword through the air. It had been too long since I'd really been in a battle.

I ran onward and closed the distance between myself and the group members in a matter of seconds. The three of them were stopped in front of a gate, and the leader seemed to have disappeared. A slim man dressed in green turned to me, pushing his bandana back up onto his forehead.

"Wow, so you used to be in SOLDIER, huh?" he said, apparently making small talk. "Not everyday ya find one in a group like AVALANCHE."

"Yeah, SOLDIER," a red-headed girl repeated, looking up from something she was doing to the gate. "Aren't they the enemy? What are you doing here with us?"

"Woah, hold up, Jessie," the man in the bandana interrupted, and the girl went back to work. "He _was_ in SOLDIER. He quit, and now he's one of us, right?" The question was probably directed at me, but I still didn't understand why we were standing around and chatting. I stayed silent and the man raised his hand to me, making sure that I knew who he was talking to. "Didn't catch your name..."

"Cloud," I said after a pause, and he seemed pleased to have gotten an answer.

"Cloud, eh? I'm..." That was exactly what I was worried he'd follow up with, and my patience wore out before he even finished his sentence. They weren't as fast workers as I had thought.

"I don't care what your names are," I responded with a shake of my head. "Once this job's over, I'm out of here." He seemed considerably less pleased at that point, but we didn't have to stand around in silence much longer as the muscle-man leader finally showed up again.

"The hell you all doin'! I thought I told you never to move in a group!" He shouted, pushing his way into the middle of the group. "Our target's the northern Mako reactor. We'll meet on the bridge in front of it."

The gate that Jessie had been working on finally came open, and the three other members scattered inside. Before going the same direction, the leader turned back to look at me one final time.

"Ex-SOLDIER, huh? Don't trust ya!" he said with a swing of his gunned-arm. "If you weren't sent to me from Tifa, I'd do with ya the same thing I do with the rest of this Shinra trash!" He took a step closer to me, but I only stood taller to match him. "The name's Barret, but we ain't about to be friends. Stay close so I can keep an eye on ya."

I decided it best not to try and pick a fight with that guy. It seemed to me that he was more muscle than brain, so there was no point in exchanging words with him, and the best scenario would probably end in me being kicked off the job. I followed him as he turned and started to run in the direction of the reactor, and memories of my surroundings started to come back to me. My eyes turned up to my left to see the Shinra building looming over the city. We were definitely on the upper-plate, which meant that getting into the reactor would be pretty easy.

I continued to follow Barret as he approached the bridge that ran by the front of the reactor. Somewhere along the line we were joined by the third member, a chubby man who had remained silent so far. He gave me a look-over as we ran, most likely interested in my story of why I was an _Ex_-SOLDIER, but I still felt no need for idle banter. We came to the bridge just as Jessie was ducking under enemy fire. Even before she saw me, I was around her and dispatching the attackers. Barret ran passed me without even a look as I returned my sword to my back, but the girl flashed me a smile. That was it, after crossing the bridge we were past the first wall of the reactor.

"Biggs, get that door open!" The leader shouted, gesturing ahead to one of the security doors on the inner wall, just before turning back to me. "Yo! This your first time in a reactor?"

"No," I answered with a shake of my head. "I _did_ work for Shinra, y'know."

"The planet's full of Mako energy. People here use it every day," He said, pointing his gun around the place. I wasn't really sure why he was telling me that, since it was a pretty well known fact that Mako was a valuable resource. I shrugged at him, and it seemed to make him impatient. "It's the life blood of the planet, but Shinra keeps suckin' the blood out with these weird machines."

"I'm not here for a lecture," I said, almost disappointed at his choice of words. "Let's just hurry."

"That's it! You're comin' with me from now on," he grumbled, restating what he'd already made clear minutes before. "Biggs, how's that door?"

"Code deciphered!" the man with the bandana said, pressing one final button that caused the door to slide open. The next door in was deciphered by Jessie, and we quickly moved onward into the elevator that would take us inside the reactor. Barret pressed a button, and the elevator started to take us down. He turned back to me again.

"Little by little, the reactors'll drain out all the life," he started up again, trying to emphasize his point, "and that'll be that."

"It's not my problem," I said with another shrug. I didn't want that guy thinking he could convert me to his cause just because he hired me on as a mercenary.

"The planet's dyin', Cloud!" he yelled, swinging both arms in frustration. I stared at him for a long moment before shaking my head again. There was something so uneasy in thinking about death.

"The only thing I care about is finishing this job before security and the Roboguards get here." He made a noise as I talked and turned away, frustrated but silent at the least.

The elevator stopped and the doors opened. I waited until the others had gotten out, and then joined the battle that had already started. There weren't too many guards to meet us, and most of them were too surprised to hold their own for more than a few seconds. I took down one as Barret threw the last against a wall, and then I heard a cry come from just down the stairs to the side.

"Wedge, look out!" I heard Biggs say. About halfway down the metal staircase, the chubby man, apparently Wedge, was surprised by a couple of new infantrymen. Without a second thought, I took a large leap off the top of the stairs, over Wedge and down to meet the enemies. It wasn't strange for a SOLDIER to be able to make such a jump, but somehow I still felt impressed by my own achievement. I cut both of the men down as I landed.

"Wow, thanks," Wedge said, his eyes retracing my path through the air. Saying nothing in return, I proceeded onward through the door at the bottom. The next room was a deep one, after which we would find ourselves in the lower levels of the reactor.

"There's quite a few ladders here," Jessie said with a sigh, stepping past a broken section of the floor. Biggs jumped over the broken bit and smirked back.

"Better start climbing then!" he said, taking the lead down the first of many ladders.

Due to the layout of that particular room, we didn't run into many enemies during our decent. As we reached the end, I dropped off of the final ladder to end some infantry gunfire that Barret had been attempting to deal with for the past minute. Those troops couldn't manage to hit me either, and after them, it was quiet. The green glow of the Mako pool beneath the structure we were on illuminated Jessie's face as she stared off the side.

"Woah, that's a lot of Mako," she said, and Barret nodded as he continued down a bridge to one of the energy processing machines.

"When we blow this place, this ain't gonna be nothin' more than a hunk of junk." he said, tapping the machine and turning his head to look at me. He held out a metal device in his real hand; the last part of the mission description. "Cloud, you set the bomb."

"Shouldn't you do it?" I questioned, trying to remind myself that Tifa trusted those guys.

"Jus' do it!" he said, smacking his gun-arm against the nearby railing. "I gotta watch to make sure you don't pull nothin'." It seemed apparent that the trust issue was mutual.

"Fine, be my guest." I really didn't mind arming a bomb, although that was usually something taught to infantrymen as opposed to SOLDIERs. SOLDIER operatives were generally given the more dangerous missions, but they weren't as expendable, and too much could go wrong while handling bombs. It seemed strange to me that I'd ever even learned how to do it. Suddenly, my body tensed and a sharp ringing noise sounded in my head. _Watch out_, a voice sounded in my head. _Remember the last reactor..._

"...What's wrong?" Barret asked, probably reacting to the look on my face. My mind was jerked back into focus, and I looked at him.

"Huh?" I said, blinking as he stepped over with the device in hand.

"What's wrong, Cloud?" he repeated, this time less concerned. "Hurry it up!"

"Yeah, sorry," I said, taking the bomb. I had no clue what just happened, but I put it behind me to focus on setting the device. It was a pretty simple mechanism, so it only took a few seconds to arm, but as soon as I did, an alarm started to blare from somewhere above us.

I spun around, eying the area, and spotted exactly what I was worried about. A Roboguard had arrived and was quickly coming our way. It was one of the large models, built like a scorpion with machine guns and a high-powered laser in it's tail. It dropped down to the bridge from a higher platform, and Jessie, Biggs and Wedge were forced to take cover from a steady spray of bullets. Then, it turned it's attention on us.

"Heads up, hear it comes!" Barret yelled, pushing past me and firing off a stream of bullets that pelted the red metal of the robot. It quivered against the shots and halted it's approach to return fire at the man. "Shit!" Barret said, diving out of the way. As usual, I wasn't about ready to scamper from cover to cover while my opponent tried to shoot me down like some kind of game. The Guard Scorpion's strength was in long range, and mine was in close, so it was time to close the gap.

I ran forward, guarding a few oncoming bullets with the flat side of my blade, and got up in front of the robot, right between the two guns where it couldn't shoot me. It staggered back against a few hits from the Buster Sword, attempting to get me back into it's sights. As soon as Barret got another opening, he released a second round into the Roboguard's side. The sound of the bullets hitting and piercing the metal so close to me was loud, and I swore that if that guy hit me, I'd take him down as fast as the machine.

The sides of the robot made scraping noises against the bridge as I fought it back to the wider area near the ladders. With a sudden jerk, the scorpion tail came around the machine and jabbed at me, leaving a gouge in the wall as it missed. It came at me a second time and I ducked the attack, striking the tail. The third time grazed my shoulder, drawing blood. I wasn't too used to the feeling that came with tearing skin. As I had thought, it had been too long since my last real battle, and even longer since I'd gotten hurt. I winced, but it was only a scratch, and it wouldn't stop me from fighting.

I struck away the tail again, and the tip of it started to power up the laser. The robot's mistake, however, was to scan the area over for targets other than just myself, as it caused a green light to glow from a place on it's head. I found _my_ target, and leaped up onto the robot's back, stabbing into the sensory receptor that it so generously made visible to me. Suddenly blinded, the robot fired the tail laser aimlessly around the room. I dodged the beam, and watched as it cut through the floor, dropping the bottom of the bridge out from under itself. The robot went tumbling down into the Mako pool below, and I leaped back onto the remaining ground where the others were safe.

"You were definitely in SOLDIER!" Wedge said, clapping a few times. Barret didn't look too ecstatic, probably having expected to take the thing down himself, but he kept his mouth shut.

"Not to rush you guys," Jessie said, running up to us from further down the bridge, "but there's ten minutes to detonation!"

"Let's get out of here," I said, and the others started up the nearby ladder. I followed closely behind as everyone found their way up through the room.

The escape from the reactor went pretty well, apart from Jessie getting her leg stuck at one point, as very few infantrymen seemed to have stayed around. Even still, I knew we were cutting it close, and as we got back up onto the bridge above, just outside the second wall, I heard the bomb go off. We weren't as far away as we would have liked, but at that point all we could do was run like we meant it. We took a sharp right after the bridge out of the reactor, and as the flames poured out, we dove into a nearby tunnel and stayed on the ground as the place shook, until everything went silent.

After a moment, I stood back up and took a look around. Everyone with me seemed to be fine, but the tunnel entrance from where we came had collapsed and been blocked off by debris. One by one, each member of AVALANCHE got back to their feet, Wedge last. After dusting himself off, Barret smirked at the smoking heap we left behind us.

"That will keep 'em off our trail for a while!" he said proudly, looking none to pleased when I decided to correct him.

"Nah," I said with a shrug of my shoulders. "With the Roboguards here, Shinra will break through this and be back on our tails in minutes."

"Well, let's try and extend that time a bit then," Wedge piped up, shifting through a pouch he had and drawing a second, smaller explosive. He seemed to have interrupted the fit Barret was about to be in. "Jessie, if you don't mind?"

"My pleasure," the girl responded, taking the device and beginning to fasten it onto a part of the wall that was still intact. "That should keep the planet going, at least a little longer."

"Yeah," Wedge agreed, and I noticed Barret nodding as well. Those guys really seemed to take pride in what they were doing. It almost made me feel like I was as uninformed about Shinra's business as I was about their loyalty in the past. Though, it really didn't matter anymore, I supposed.

"Okay," Jessie said, finishing the preparations on the explosive. "Now everyone get back!" I took note that the incredibly short timer on the device was already counting down, and turned heel to run the opposite way down the tunnel. I could hear the others running behind me. It wasn't a long distance from where we were to the tunnel's exit, but even being in front I was licked by the flames behind me when the thing blew. I dive-rolled out the exit, letting my back cool from the fresh air. I'd ran a bit ahead of everyone else, so I imagined a few of them would be emerging with some minor burns, but something told me that those guys were used to getting singed here and there. I couldn't say I was too different.

Barret jumped out of the tunnel next, followed by Biggs and Jessie, who surprisingly had smiles on their faces. Wedge ran out last, hobbling about as he struggled to put out a fire that had apparently caught the back of his pants. Once he'd succeeded in cooling himself off, he walked up to us with a grimace that he twisted into a smile, and Barret stepped forward to address us.

"All right, now let's get out of here," he said, gesturing his hand and swinging his gun-arm. "Rendezvous at Sector Eight station! Split up and get on the train!"

On that cue, the three other members nodded and started to run in separate directions. Barret turned to run away as well, and I stepped forward to stop him.

"H-hey!" I called, and he stopped in place just before turning with a huff.

"If it's about your money, save it 'til we're back at the hideout!" Then he was off. Normally, I would have made him pay me right then and there, but I _was_ planning on seeing Tifa again before looking for my next job, so I figured it wasn't a big problem. So all I had to do was find the train station in Sector Eight, huh? I had been there plenty of times during my work in SOLDIER, as it was close to one of the Shinra building's main entrances, so it wouldn't be a hard thing to find. All that concerned me was that I might run into someone I knew in the past. After all, I _was_ one of the only first classes at the time.

I supposed that Shinra would have to know I was alive eventually, so with a stretch of my arms, I started off to the train station, through LOVELESS avenue.


	55. A SOLDIER's Alliance Part 2

**Zack**

"So, it's been a few months, huh?" I looked over my hands and chest, taking in the various bits of wear and tear on my old uniform. It had been washed during my time of being unconscious, the rips and tears from bullets had been mended, but nothing could quite cover up the evidence of all I'd been through. Tseng shut his eyes as if to recall something before he spoke to me.

"Yes, you've been effectively dead for some time now," Tseng said, oh so elegantly, reopening his eyes to watch my face twist at his words. Why wasn't I dead, anyway? I remembered being filled with bullets, and saying my goodbyes. I remembered it all; not a bit of it was blurry to me. "We weren't entirely sure that you would wake up again."

"So, what now?" I sighed, turning my eyes away from him. "Do I get to be another experiment for a few more years?" I looked back, and Tseng seemed pained by my question, slowly shaking his head.

"I'm sorry, Zack. I had no choice back in Nibelheim," he said, sounding more emotional than he usually allowed himself to. Just for that, I had to believe him. "If I had tried to rescue you from that place, Shinra would have had me executed, or perhaps I would have joined you in Hojo's lab."

"So, you have a choice now?" I asked, almost before he could finish his sentence. He stared at me for a moment before saying anything else.

"I've already made my choice," he answered, stepping over to the boarded window. "Shinra does not know that you're still alive. That knowledge has been only between myself, Reno, and Rude."

"Tseng," I said, trying to figure out how to respond to something like that. He was risking his job and probably his life by keeping me alive. "Wait, what about Cissnei?" Tseng paused again, tensing as I said her name. It seemed as though I was hitting a lot of uncomfortable topics for him.

"...Cissnei is no longer with the Turks." He finally spoke, turning around and ever so slightly leaning himself against the wall. "Similarly to yours, Cissnei's life was spared only under the false pretense of her death."

"Hold on! What happened?" I said, jerking myself forward from my seat on the medical bed. My muscles ached as I moved, and I was reminded of how long I'd been lying there. Tseng barely reacted to my movement, but turned his drifting eyes back to me.

"She's living her life now under her real name. Other than that, I have no information." He seemed to be telling the truth, and I hung my head as I considered the possibilities. I hoped to myself that it wasn't because she let me get away.

"We've been monitoring you the whole time you've been unconscious." Reno piped up from the doorway to the small room we were in. "After we pulled a few bullets outta ya, you healed up pretty fast, and you're muscles didn't suffer the usual effects from laying on your back all day." He shrugged and snickered a little as he continued. "You oughta thank the doctor for all that Mako. Hey...!" Reno was interrupted by a well deserved smack to the shoulder by Rude, who attempted to hide that it was him by clearing his throat and looking the other way.

"You should be in top shape fairly soon," Tseng clarified, then he seemed to take notice that there was clearly something on my mind. "Is there something wrong?"

"Was," I started, still unsure if I should ask the question I wanted to ask, "was there anyone else with me in the rocks when you found me?" Tseng again stared for a long moment before responding.

"No. Only you were there to the best of our knowledge." I considered his answer. Nobody else being there was probably a good sign, since Shinra didn't bother to move me when they thought I was dead. However, I wasn't entirely convinced that Cloud could have made it into the city on the little strength he had in him. Tseng still seemed interested in my question, but rather than ask me about it, he simply extended his answer. "Also, the sword you received from Angeal was no longer on your person. A few materia were recovered, and I believe that some of them belonged to you." He reached into his pocket, drawing a shiny red orb and holding it towards me. "Including this one."

"My Ifrit materia!" I recognized it, and reclaimed it from him as he stepped closer.

"I recall the day when you first found that summon materia," he said, smiling a little by the foot of the bed. "You were rather... proud to have found such a rare item."

"Yeah," I agreed, thinking back on it. "I guess I _did_ kinda show it off a lot..." Tseng laughed.

"You never could have been a Turk."

"Hey, why not?" I said, looking up from the materia at him, sporting an offended frown.

"You're very excitable, you can be clumsy, forgetful, you like to rush head first into battle, you adore public attention," he said, listing one thing after another with uncomfortable ease, "you could have probably taken a more stealthy path to escape the army, but instead you drove a motorcycle across the fields where the soldiers were encamped, and took the road to that army's home-city in broad daylight..."

"Okay, all right!" I waved my hand for him to stop. "I get it. I guess I made a good choice joining SOLDIER then... or at least I thought I did."

"You were possibly the best SOLDIER that Shinra had ever seen," Tseng said, getting serious again. "I'm sorry that things had to turn out the way that they did."

"Hmmm." I looked over my uniform again, and at all the spots that had been covered in my own blood, from the wounds I received from the people I'd worked for. "What's happened to SOLDIER now?"

"It has been reorganized and put under the leadership of Heidegger, alongside the military." I looked at him as he talked, and he didn't sound too satisfied with what he was saying. I wasn't either. Heidegger was always such a brutish man, prone to punishing his troops for his own faults. From the safety of SOLDIER, it was kind of fun to laugh to ourselves about his temper, but we were always glad that he wasn't in charge of us. "SOLDIER is still an elite force, but they're more commonly used for protecting important sites, rather than the special missions they used to receive. The latter has been directed to the Turks."

"And there's fewer of us now," Reno chimed in again. "We've been pretty swamped."

"I guess a lot has happened in four years, huh?" I let my eyes drift again, this time to the mostly boarded window, trying to catch a glimpse of the light from outside. From what I could see, the light was being blocked out by the plate above. We were in the slums. It made sense that the Turks would have had to hide me there so that Shinra didn't find out. That sent my mind in an entirely new direction. "Tseng... how's Aerith?" He looked me over for a moment and nodded.

"Wait here for a moment." With that, Tseng left the room and returned moments later with a bunch of closed envelopes, bound together by string. He set them down at the end of bed, almost looking hesitant as he took back his hand. "Eighty-eight letters, all from her," he said with a gentle smile. "She misses you, Zack."

I didn't really know what to do or say as I stared at the bundle. I had so many emotions going through my head at that moment, it was almost as though something snapped. I held my hand out to the letters, thinking about Aerith, thinking about Angeal, Lazard and even Genesis, and everything that I lost or that kept me from the life I wanted to live. Every thought, slowly but surely, brought me back to Cloud and how much I wanted to ask about him by name, but was too afraid to. I had to get out of there. Aerith must have said so much in her letters, but I wanted to hear every bit from her mouth, and maybe I'd even find something out about Cloud. I stood up for the first time since I'd fallen at the rocks outside the city, and turned sharply to Tseng.

"I need to go see her!" I said, packing the bundle of letters away into a pouch. My muscles fought against my standing legs, but I was too determined to let them bother me.

"I expected nothing else," he said softly, stepping over to a cabinet by the door. "But Zack, you must realize that once you step out that door and Shinra is aware of your presence, we're your enemies again."

"I know, I understand," I said, walking over to him. He drew a large sword from the cabinet, comparable in size to the Buster Sword, and held it to me by the hilt.

"I want you to take this," he said, and I grasped the hilt in my hand. "It's the First Tsurugi, otherwise known as a Fusion Sword. It's meant to bind to five other auxiliary blades to increase its power, but unfortunately, I only know the whereabouts of this one piece."

"Still, it's a pretty neat hunk of metal," Reno added, throwing his arms up behind his head.

"Thank you," I said, strapping the sword to my back where the Buster had once been. "Thank you for everything, Tseng."

"Take care of yourself," he said back, stepping aside to allow me through the door.

I looked back over the room behind myself, taking a final glance at Reno and Rude and the bed where I'd been laying for so long. Then, with a stretch of my muscles, I set out through the door to get my life back.


	56. A SOLDIER's Alliance Part 3

**Cloud**

The minutes that followed the explosion at the Sector One reactor were nothing but chaos. Whether the blast had gone further than expected or not was unclear, but it was obvious that many people had heard it. Frankly, the chaos made it easier for me to move around. Everyone was running this way and that, looking for cover in case they were under some kind of attack. This meant that by the time I was walking down the streets, they were pretty clear. It also seemed as though there were no Shinra troops around. I supposed that any nearby infantrymen were on the other side of the forty-foot mass of debris that AVALANCHE had just left in their wake. It was all pretty convenient, but I had no doubt in my mind that more men were on their way. After all, it wasn't every day that a terrorist group managed to blow up a reactor, and Shinra would make it their priority to turn them into 'examples'.

As I walked onto the familiar streets of LOVELESS avenue, it wasn't all the differences that came with the passing of time that caught my eye, but instead it was a girl: dressed in pink and carrying a basket on her arm. She was the only person who wasn't running about in a frenzy, and she was staring directly at me. When it became evident that my attention was also directed at her, she took a few steps towards me and started to speak.

"Excuse me," she said, her voice emitting the same calm as her green eyes. There was something odd about those eyes, almost like the eyes of a SOLDIER, infused with mako – but, it wasn't quite the same. "What happened?"

I stayed silent for a moment, deciding between the truth, a lie, or just avoiding the subject entirely. She definitely didn't seem as though she would cause any trouble if she knew the truth, but then I supposed that even someone as calm as she appeared to be wouldn't take to well to hearing that I just blew up one of the power sources she relied on. Bright colors drew my attention to the basket on her arm, and helped me make a decision on what to say.

"Don't see many flowers around here." She seemed to take a moment to process the sudden change of topic, but then brightened up and held the basket in front of herself to look the flowers over.

"Oh, these? Do you like them?" she asked, looking back up at me with a gentle smile. "They're only a gil." I folded my arms and tilted my head at the plants. I didn't really think that I'd be stopping to purchase something from a street peddler, especially at a time like that, but she seemed pretty nice, and one gil was very inexpensive for something so rare.

"Yeah, sure. I'll take one," I answered, removing a gil from my pocket. I didn't have too much money on my person, but that was going to change as soon as I made my way back to AVALANCHE's base at Seventh Heaven. That reminded me that I really had to get going before the reinforcements showed.

"Oh, thank you!" She smiled wider and drew a red flower from the bunch. "Here you are." I almost responded back to her, but then I picked up the faint sound of boots, running in a group. Either the infantry backup was coming, or the troops we left behind got through the debris faster than I'd expected. Whatever the case, I had to keep moving.

I started down the street away from the flower girl, forgetting to say anything as I went. I eased the flower into a pouch on the side of my old uniform, and picked up the pace, practically jogging through a plaza that looked as though it may have taken some damage when the reactor went down. The sound of the boots picked up, and I came to a stop as someone called out from behind me.

"Hey! You there!" I didn't turn around at first, instead listening to the footsteps as they slowed, judging the distance between myself and source of the voice. The clicking sound of a gun being readied assured me that it was indeed infantrymen. Taking in one long breath, I shut my eyes and prepared myself. Before the two men could even react, I had spun around to face them, moved in and used my arms to slam both of their guns to either side, causing their panicked spray of bullets to hit nothing but the walls. My arms already in the air, I reached back and drew the Buster Sword, cutting down both men in a wide swing of the blade. They fell easily enough, but more were coming from the same direction, and they were already firing bullets.

"Hmph..." I grunted, ducking and running out into the next street. From two of the three directions I could choose to run, infantrymen were arriving in droves. They joined in firing their weapons, and I was forced to retreat down the last section of road. Much to my dismay, I was met with opposition that way as well. They weren't firing their guns at that point, because it was pretty clear that I was surrounded. There was far too many of them to take on by myself. Even a SOLDIER first class couldn't take out that many infantrymen at once.

"That's as far as you go," one of the men said, training his gun on me. I surveyed my surroundings. I was trapped on all sides besides one, which would take me to the edge of a bridge. I smiled, listening to the sound of a train's whistle as it approached. That wouldn't be the first time I jumped off a bridge onto a moving train.

"I don't have time to be messin' around with you guys," I said, taking a few backward steps toward the edge. That just seemed to aggravate them.

"Enough babbling!" one of the men shouted. "You're coming with us!" They all began to approach me and I saw my chance. I turned around and leaped off the bridge just as a train sped by. I landed successfully and ducked down as I went through a tunnel, shielding myself from the bullets of the frustrated troops. It was safe to say that I was finally in the clear.

A few moments later, once the train had left the tunnel, I was staying low on the roof to avoid being seen, and I heard the only sound I figured could have been louder than the train itself. Barret's voice boomed from inside the next train car, followed by the sound of something being hit. With a smirk, I moved carefully over to the next car and leaned over the side, trying to force the car door open. It was a storage car, so it took some work, but once I got it open, I lowered myself down and swung inside. Sure enough, everyone was in there, looking as startled as can be and yelling my name.

"Looks like I'm a little late," I said, brushing the hair from my face and planting a hand on my hip. Everyone was silent, and Barret just stood there looking dumbfounded until he managed to scrunch his face back into a sneer.

"You damn right, you're late!" he said, shaking both his fist and his gun-arm as though he forgot he only had one hand. "Come waltzin' in here, makin' a big scene!"

"It's no big deal," I said with a shrug. Some part of me seemed to enjoy getting him riled up like that. "Just what I always do."

"Shit! Havin' everyone worried like that!" He crossed his arms, leaning back against the wall behind him. "You don't give a damn 'bout no one but yourself!"

"Hmm..." I shrugged again, considering how wrong he was. Honestly though, I really wasn't sure how much I cared about any of _them_. I shook my head to clear my thoughts and smiled back at Barret. "You were worried about me?"

"Wha!" he flailed his arms in frustration, and I almost wanted to laugh. Some people really let others get to them too much. I supposed I'd just grown out of that early on. "I'm takin' it out of your money, hotshot!" He turned and walked over to the end of the car where Wedge seemed to be nodding off. "Wake up! We're movin' out! Follow me!"

Still in a huff, Barret stepped over a few boxes and moved into the next car through a door. Wedge turned to me before following the leader.

"Hey, Cloud. You were great back there!" he said. I simply stared at him, unsure of how to respond. That seemed to be fine with him, and he smiled and followed Barret into the next car. I felt a tap on my shoulder and Biggs stepped around me.

"Heh, we'll do even better _next_ time." He followed Wedge, and I turned around to watch Jessie close the side-door where I came in.

"Say, thanks for helping me back there at the reactor," she said, and turned to look at me with a smile. "Oh, Cloud! Your face is pitch-black." She stepped up to me and before I knew what she was doing, her sleeve was rubbing against my cheek. When she took it away, I noticed that it was now covered in soot. I must have picked that up from the explosion, or maybe even the train tunnel. "There you go."

Jessie didn't stick around even for a 'thanks', and I followed her into the next car with the others. It was clear that AVALANCHE was starting to be well known in Midgar, or at least it was clear that they looked like a bunch of psychos, since almost every passenger in that car moved onto the next one as soon as we came in. Barret dropped down into a seat, and Jessie turned back to me.

"Just a heads up; when the red lights come on, it means we're being ID checked by the Shinra central data bank." She looked back and forth after speaking, and then leaned in close to whisper to me. "Anyone could tell that we look suspicious, so we're using fake IDs." I nodded to tell her that I understood, and she moved on to stand by Wedge at the opposite wall. I had no recollection of Shinra using automated ID checks before, and I couldn't help but wonder what else they'd upgraded.

A few minutes went by, and we all remained silent until Barret gestured out the window.

"Look. You can see the surface now. This city don't have no day or night." I stepped over to the window to glance out. It was clear that we'd moved down below the upper-plate and were headed for the slums. Barret looked at me, probably trying to gauge my reaction, but I'd seen the slums several times before. "If that plate weren't there, we could see the sky."

"A floating city," I mused. "Pretty unsettling scenery." Barret stood up and turned to me, giving me a strange look.

"Huh? Never expected to hear that outta someone like you," he responded, keeping that look on his face. "You just full of surprises."

I had to admit, at least to myself, that I wouldn't have expected such a thing from me either. To be honest, that was the first time that I was really considering the slums and the upper-plate without being able to say that I had a home to go back to up top. Barret stepped past me, looking over his teammates, and then turned back.

"The upper world: a city on a plate," he continued, twisting his face again into an angry one. "It's 'cuz of that damn 'pizza' that people underneath are sufferin'! And the city below is full of polluted air." He turned to Wedge, swinging his arm to get the guy's attention. "On top of that, the reactor keeps drainin' up all the energy."

"Then why doesn't everyone move onto the plate?" I felt ignorant even as I asked the question, but a part of me wanted to cling onto the hope that I wouldn't end up getting stuck in the slums.

"Dunno. Probably 'cuz they ain't got no money," he said, stepping a little closer to me. "Or maybe 'cuz they love their land, no matter how polluted it gets." He hit his hand against his chest, as though he felt a power or a connection to the people in his own words. That guy was committed, and I sort of envied how set he was in his beliefs and his purpose in life. The others around him seemed to feel the same power or connection, and suddenly I felt uncomfortably alone. I turned back to the window to stare up at the plate, and the suffering world underneath.

"I know. No one lives in the slums because they want to," I said with a sigh, wondering why I felt so alone all of a sudden. "They're like this train; it can't run anywhere except where its rails take it."

Barret stayed silent for the rest of the ride. I had a feeling as though I'd finally made a good impression with that man, but I didn't really know how to feel about _that_. With a final sound of the whistle, our train pulled into the station at the Sector Seven slums. The door opened, and a young couple stepped out first, sharing a kiss and holding each other in their arms. Next was a woman and her child, holding hands and laughing. The members of AVALANCHE left the train just before me, locked together in a bond of camaraderie, and I walked out alone, left to question my place. What would I even do once I was paid for that job and was free to go?

"Yo! Get over here, all ya!" Barret boomed out his orders, but this time it felt more determined than aggravated. The members of AVALANCHE gathered up in a line in front of the man, and I took my time approaching from the back. "This mission was a success, but don't get lazy now. The hard part's still to come!" Barret began, and the group exchanged looks while waiting for him to continue. "Don't y'all be scared of that explosion, 'cuz the next one's gonna be bigger than that!" He pounded his gun against his hand with a proud smirk, and gestured away from the station. "Meet back at the hideout! Move out!"

I followed that group as they made their way back to their 'hideout': the bar where I knew I'd find Tifa. It was still such a strange feeling to see her after all that time, and I got unreasonably anxious the closer we got to the place. I let myself fall back a bit as I thought, still keeping the others in sight. I was trying so hard now to forget the past; I was starting a new job, a new life, and new memories. Too much about the past was painful, and I wasn't going to allow that kind of pain into my life again. But then there was Tifa: a reminder of my past, both pleasant and uncomfortable at the same time, but I didn't want to just forget about _her_.

We came into a dusty area full of poor-quality homes and dim-lit signs. That was one of the places that people lived there in the slums. I'd never actually been to a place like that before, since many of them were sort of out of the way, and Shinra had little interest in them. I heard gunshots ahead, but as I was about to prepare for danger, I could see that it was simply Barret putting on a show to scare people out of his hideout, and probably losing Tifa a few customers. There was Seventh Heaven, and there was Tifa, following the customers out after Barret chased them a bit, and giving them a few bows in apology or thanks. I moved in to see her, but a gun-arm stopped me in place, and she disappeared back into the bar.

"Heh heh." Barret chuckled, lowering his arm and giving me an odd look. "You want to meet your little baby?"

"...Little baby?" I questioned, more than a bit confused. That caused the man's brow to promptly furrow.

"Hey, don' act like you don't know what I mean!" he said, and after a bit more thought I remembered. I had heard that Barret and Tifa had taken to caring for a little girl. I wasn't really sure where she came from, but I knew she wasn't actually _theirs_. "Go on ahead."

Barret stepped aside, and my eyes turned to the stairs leading up to Tifa's bar. There was no good in putting it off, and I wasn't sure I even _wanted_ to, so I started up and passed through the saloon-type door to get in. The place was pretty small, sort of like a wooden box, and had room for only two tables and a counter near the makeshift kitchen that was squeezed into the corner. A young girl jumped to attention, dropping off the bar stool where she had been sitting.

"Papa!" she yelled in excitement, apparently expecting Barret. As soon as she realized I wasn't who she thought, it looked like her faced was fighting between going pale and red as a tomato. She ran straight into the corner of the place and just stood there, not looking back at me. I found it amusing that she could be startled so badly by a stranger when she remained completely unphased by the bullets that were fired off moments earlier.

My eyes found Tifa as she stepped out from behind the counter, kneeling down next to the girl. She was dressed in a tight white shirt and a leather skirt, gloves pulled over both hands. It was such a vast difference from how she used to dress in Nibelheim, but in a way that helped.

"Marlene," she said softly to the girl. "Aren't you going to say anything to Cloud?" She stood up and turned around, walking in my direction. The little girl, Marlene, came to me as well, clinging to Tifa's leg from behind. "Welcome home, Cloud," Tifa said, her eyes squinting just a bit as a smile spread across her face. "Looks like everything went well." She hesitated for a moment, brushing a bit of hair from her face and leaning in closer to me. "Did you fight with Barret?"

"Maybe," I answered, shrugging my shoulders, "a little."

"I should have known." She sighed, but it sounded rather faked. She turned her waist to pet the top of Marlene's hair. The girl was still clinging to Tifa's leg, peering up at me from her safe spot. "He's always pushing people around, and you've always been in fights ever since you were little." She stopped petting Marlene, but left her hand on the girl's head as she looked back up at me. "I was worried."

"Oh," I said, reaching back to the pouch on my waist and finding the red flower I purchased earlier. I held it out to her, and she blinked at it a few times before saying anything.

"Flowers? How nice." She leaned in close to look it over, and turned her eyes up to me as she spoke. "You almost never see them here in the slums."

"That's what I thought too," I agreed, wondering why she still hadn't taken it from me. "You don't really see them up top either."

"But, a flower for me? Oh Cloud, you shouldn't have." She gave me an exaggerated smile, most likely to try and embarrass me, but before I could really react or say anything, I was distracted. The thunking noise of heavy feet running up the stairs was followed by Barret bursting through the door. He was obviously full of energy, and came charging into the middle of the room. It was all I could do to get up close to the table that _wasn't _being used by the other members of AVALNCHE, and avoid being trampled. The man turned his head to look over the room with a big grin on his face, and Marlene perked up immediately.

"Papa, welcome home!" She ran up to him with her arms out, and he promptly lifted her high into the air and bounced her up and down. It was such an odd sight: this little girl with her arm hanging over a machine-gun-hand.

"Yeah!" He laughed, moving her up to sit on his shoulder. Then he looked at Tifa, and cocked his head a bit. "Huh? Where'd you get that flower?"

"Cloud gave it to us," Marlene answered, and Barret turned his head back to look at her. I glanced up from my seat on the table, not having expected to hear my name.

"Oh," he said, and he was silent for a moment after that. For a minute, I figured he'd find some way to get angry over that, but then he spoke again. "Did you thank him?" Marlene was quiet in consideration of that, and then she twisted herself back to look at me, holding on to Barret's gun.

"Thank you, Cloud," she said, her voice starting rather quiet. "We'll take care of you." I watched her as she stared at me, waiting for a response, and I nodded, not really knowing what to say.

"You all right, Barret?" Tifa asked, putting her hands up on her hips.

"Great!" the man boomed, brushing a knuckle against his nose with his free hand. Then he gestured to the others, who had stood up from their table at that point. "Get in here, fools! We're startin' the meetin'!"

With that, Barret stepped over to what appeared to be a pinball machine and pressed a button. The floor began moving under him and Marlene: a secret elevator taking them down to a lower level. The rest of the group followed to the hole in the floor, and let themselves drop down after him. I waited up top, watching Tifa as she walked back behind the bar, and the floor came back up to conceal the elevator once more.

"Sit down," Tifa said softly, and then turned around to look at me. I walked up and took a seat on a stool by the counter, watching her eyes follow me. She smiled. "How about... something to drink?"

"I don't really feel like it," I replied, having had very little experience with alcohol. I'd rarely even had caffeine in my lifetime. She pouted a bit in consideration.

"You should _try_ something," she said, turning around and stepping over to the bottles on the shelves. "Just a minute. I'll make one for you." I heard her pour something, mix it with something else, shake it, and finally drop a few ice cubes into the glass. I didn't really know what she made me as she slid it down the counter and into my hands, but knowing the name wouldn't have helped much anyway.

"Thanks," I said quietly. She clasped her hands behind her back and slowly started to walk back my way, as I did nothing but look over my drink and contemplate its smell.

"You know, I'm relieved you made it back safely." She stopped in front of me, smiling again. I shifted the glass around in my hands, my thoughts leading me to a question.

"What's with you all of a sudden?" I asked, looking up at her from my seat. "That wasn't even a tough job."

"I guess not..." she said, pursing her lips slightly. "You were in SOLDIER." I shifted the glass back around and turned my eyes down on it, away from her. She ran her fingers down the side of her hair and made a little sigh. "Make sure you get your pay from Barret."

"Don't worry," I said, pushing the drink away and standing up from my seat. "Once I get that money, I'm out of here." She seemed to hang her shoulders a bit as I turned away, fighting with my own thoughts.

"Cloud," she said, a very different tone in her voice. "Are you feeling all right?"

"...Yeah," I answered after a moment, looking back at her. "Why?"

"No reason," she said, pulling the glass I left closer to her. "You just look a little tired, I guess."

I watched her take the drink and turn away from me to dispose of it. I wanted to talk to her more, but my mind wasn't in the right place, so I walked over to the machine, found the button, and started the elevator down to speak with Barret. Tifa was right; I _was_ tired. There were too many different thoughts flooding my mind, old ones and new. Being with her, thinking about Nibelheim, it was too much. Some part of me really wanted to stay, but I knew I couldn't, not if I wanted to move on with my life. I didn't want to be tired anymore.


	57. A SOLDIER's Alliance Part 4

**Zack**

Tseng and the Turks had been hiding me in a small building near the train tracks under the plate. As was always the case, the area around the tracks was kept at least somewhat tidy just to make sure that no businessman who had to ride by would be burdened by the thoughts of how bad people actually had it down there. I'd been down there before, so I thought I knew what to expect as I traveled away from that spot and further into the slums, but what I saw as I went was a lot worse than I thought. I'd always heard from civilians that Shinra didn't bother to take care of the slums, and that building a plate above them just successfully allowed the company to ignore the troubles of those below. There were always a lot of negative things being said, so at the time I paid no regard to those words, but now I was getting a good eyeful of the truth.

Piles of junk accumulated around the once open spaces, shoveled aside to create makeshift paths. There were signs of wear and tear everywhere, including damage that I could have sworn happened all the way back when Genesis used Shinra technology against us. The whole place looked and smelled pretty much like a dump, but the worst part was that most of the trash looked to be discarded building supplies and broken or outdated tools that were once used on the plate above. It wasn't just a dump; the slums had been turned into the junkyard for all the trash the rich people of Midgar needed to dispose of. Shinra really _didn't_ car about the people below. It was almost as if the company was just waiting for all the poor folk to die out so they could use the space for other things.

The more I thought about it, the more I felt like lashing out at the company. Those thoughts had to be quickly dismissed, however, as it would do me no good to come straight out of recovery and get caught up in fighting off the army _again_. At the very least, I owed it to Tseng to keep my head down for a bit. When it all came down to it, what mattered most to me was finding Aerith and looking for information on Cloud. The latter was probably going to be a difficult task, seeing as Cloud was likely using an alternate name and could be doing pretty much anything in the city, if he was even _in_ the city, if he was even alive. I stopped myself abruptly on that last thought. Cloud _was_ alive, he had to be. I had seen with my own eyes how he began to recover his strength, how he went from being unable to move or talk to dragging away the heavy Buster Sword. He survived a level of mako poisoning that would have killed most men, so there was no chance that he wasn't still fighting.

As I walked on, I reached my hand back and touched the hilt of the First Tsurugi Tseng had given to me. The sword was significantly lighter than the Buster, so I found myself repeatedly checking to make sure it was still there. This time, as I brought my eyes to look over my shoulder, I noticed that I was being followed rather closely by several individuals who, judging from their clothing, were residents of the slums. I hadn't seen any houses yet, but I figured there had to be some nearby. I wasn't sure whether or not to address the men, as I was still trying to keep a low profile to the best of my ability, but on the other hand those guys managed to come up to me without being heard even by my enhanced sense, which probably meant they were trying to get the jump on me.

"Okay, guys," I said, stopping in my tracks and facing my pursuers. "Can I help you fellows with something?"

"Why don'tcha help yourself, and hand over your gil without a fight?" the closest man to me responded, drawing a dirty handgun from his pocket. Was I really being mugged?

"You sure this is a good idea?" one of the other two guys whispered. "This guy looks like he's in SOLDIER."

"Stop whining!" the apparent leader huffed, keeping his gun trained on me but not his eyes. "That's an old emblem. He probably pulled that uniform outta the trash!"

"Old emblem?" I wondered aloud, looking over the symbol of SOLDIER displayed on my belt.

"Look, now you've gone and wasted our time!" the man continued rather impatiently, jabbing his gun in the air at me. "Hand over the money or you're gonna get shot!"

"Come on guys, don't make me fight you." I sighed, actually feeling bad about the idea of beating up guys who were probably just desperate. The man seemed put off by my calm demeanor, and grew very suddenly angry.

"Outta time, pal!" He lifted his gun and took a shot at me, but his aim was slow and sloppy, and by the time the bullet was fired, I was already up close to him with my hand around his wrist. Applying pressure, it didn't take long for me to get the guy to drop the weapon, yanking his wrist back in pain.

"Son of a...!" he yelled, taking a step back. The other two men actually appeared to be unarmed. Either that or they were just too shocked to draw weapons on me. I kicked the gun up from the ground and caught it in mid-air. Placing a hand on either side of the thing, I snapped it in two, separating the trigger from the barrel and tossing both pieces off to the side. All it took then was a pointed look at the muggers to start them dashing off in the other direction, but I caught the back of the leader's shirt in my hand before he left. "Ahh, let me go!" He shouted, and his two friends just kept running.

"Say," I started, pulling the man in closer to me and speaking over his shoulder, "have you seen anyone else wearing an old uniform like me?"

"Huh? N-no!" he answered, giving up on trying to wriggle his way out of my grasp. "I ain't seen that old emblem for years!"

"That's disappointing," I said, letting lose my grip on the guy's shirt. He nearly fell to his knees before scrambling up and running off like a madman. At the very least, I could cross-out the Sector Four slums as a place Cloud's been. Sure that the muggers were gone, I turned-heal and headed back the way I was going to begin with. Aerith's church was in Sector Five, so I shouldn't have had long to go, but it could be almost like a maze underneath the plate, and it wasn't even guaranteed that there would be a path into the conjoined sector. All I could do was walk and hope that I was headed in the right direction.

After a few more minutes of just walking, the only change around me seemed to be that the piles of junk were getting a bit smaller. Having not remembered seeing a whole lot of trash around the church, I took that as a good sign, but I still had no idea where I was going. Just as I came to a fork in the path, something hit me sharp at the base of my neck from behind. Whatever it was toppled to the ground by my side as I grabbed the sore spot it had left behind. Promptly, I turned around expecting to have to deal with another bunch of muggers, and what I saw was so surprising that I barely managed to dodge another brick that was thrown my way. There was a woman, probably in her thirties and showing the worn signs of living amongst the trash, rather irate and preparing yet another brick as she yelled something to me.

"Give me my son back!" she cried, tossing the thing at me. I raised my arms and let the brick bounce off, not really quite sure how to react. "You people have no right to be messing with our lives! Don't you think we have it hard enough?"

"W-wait, hold on!" I said, swinging my arms for her to cease and desist. She grabbed something else to throw at me, but before she could, a man came running over from who knows where to stop her.

"Darling, please stop!" the man, probably just a bit older than she was, begged. "I don't want you to get taken too!"

"But, our boy!" the woman cried again.

"What happened to your son?" I asked, staring to walk up closer to them. I could tell they were nervous as I approached. "Maybe I could help?"

"Why would we trust you?" the woman snapped, and the man continued to hold her. "Your with the company too!"

"Hang on," the man said, loosening his embrace on the woman as she calmed a bit. "That's an _old_ SOLDIER emblem on your belt."

"So I hear," I said, scratching at the back of my neck. Why did everyone else seem to know about that other than me? So much for not sticking out, I supposed. I focused my eyes back on the two people before me and gave my most reassuring smile. "I'm not with Shinra anymore. What did they do?"

"It's our son, Timothy," the man responded. His heart looked like it was sinking even as he told me that. "Please, you should follow us back to the house so that my wife can sit down, and I can tell you all about it."

"To our house?" the woman echoed him, giving a wary look.

"It's okay," he answered. "He's not with Shinra, and he says he wants to help." The man turned back to me and gestured with his hand, so I followed as they began to walk.

I thought it was a bit strange that the man, the husband, seemed to be so much more trusting of me, especially after it sounded like they'd been slighted by the company I used to work for. They really didn't seem as if they'd be leading me into a trap, however, and I wasn't sure that even the _dangerous_ people in the slums had enough will or resources to really pose much of a threat to me. After just a couple of turns down the path, we made our way to a small area filled with makeshift shacks and mobile-homes. I thought about how that was the first time I'd ever been to one of the residential areas of the slums. The closest I'd ever seen was a small area in Sector Five, but that was mostly made up of shops to attract people on their way to the Wall Market. The woman leading the way gave me another distrusting look before turning to one of the homes and unlocking the door.

"So," I started, taking in the sight of their worn down home as I walked inside, "what did Shinra do to your son?"

"They took him away," the man said, helping his wife take a seat. "Only half an hour ago."

"He was only playing!" The wife spoke up, thrusting her arms out in anger. "He threw something at one of the men and said he was with that... that AVALANCHE, and they took him away."

"AVALANCHE?" I considered that name. I'd dealt with a terrorist organization by that name years ago, but... it couldn't be the same people, could it? I'd thought they were long gone by now.

"Yes, that terrorist group!" the husband responded. "They're anti-Shinra, so sometimes you get some of the people here supporting them. I mean, with the way they treat us, who could blame them?"

"But now they're just making trouble for all of us!" the wife cried. "Shinra's taking people away if they even suspect that they're involved with AVALANCHE, but how could they think poor Timothy could be involved? He's just a boy."

"You said it was only a half-hour ago?" I asked, growing angry at what I was hearing. "Tell me which way they went, and I'll chase them down."

"They traveled to the west of here," the husband said, pointing out the window. "But, are you sure you're up to taking them on?"

"They'll never see me coming," I assured him with a grin, then stopped to scratch at the back of my neck. "At least, I hope they won't see me. I was sort of trying to keep my head down around the company."

"Oh!" the husband said, jumping up from the seat he'd taken. I barely had a chance to react before he'd crossed the room, pulled something out of a cardboard box and handed it out to me. I looked over the item with a bemused expression on my face. It appeared to be a corny kind of helmet: like the ones that you'd see in a superhero show. The man urged me to take it with a hopeful look on his face. "Here! It's one of my stage-performing props," he told me proudly. "It will keep most of your head hidden."

"Th-thanks," I said, taking the helmet from him and turning to the door. "Don't worry, I'll be back with your boy!"

"Please keep Timothy safe!" the wife called as I ran off, helmet in hand. It seemed as though I'd already picked my old ways back up, and it was time to play hero again.

It wasn't long until my heightened senses picked up the sound of a number of boots walking, and I climbed a nearby pile of scrap metal to get a good look ahead of me. Sure enough, there they were: three armed Shinra infantrymen just escorting a young boy.

"Heh, guess this is it," I said, looking over the prop helmet the man had given me. I slid the thing on over my head and climbed a little higher to stand on top of the heap, yelling down to the men. "Going somewhere guys?"

"What the hell?" one of the infantrymen exclaimed, spinning around to face me. All three men trained their guns on me, if only out of surprise.

I knew it would be pointless to ask them to let the boy go in return for their safety, at least as long as they thought they were dealing with some goof in a mask. Also, it wouldn't make much sense to have told them exactly why I was there, so I decided on the next option: charge right in. I took a huge leap off of the heap of metal, drawing my sword and choosing a target. Bullets rushed passed me as I fell, and the boy ducked in fear. I cut down the first of the three men upon landing, successfully avoiding all the gunfire, and then rammed the hilt of my sword into the next guy's stomach, finishing him with an elbow strike to the chin. The third soldier started spraying bullets at me in a frenzy and, worrying that he might accidentally hit the kid, I took him out even faster than the others. He flew through the air and deep into a pile of junk with a single hit. Pretty sure that none of those guys would be moving anytime soon, I put my sword away and turned around to find the kid.

Timothy slowly looked up from his crouched position on the ground. The kid was probably about twelve years of age, and he didn't really look too scared despite the situation. I walked up and held out a hand, smiling down at him.

"Is that... my father's mask?" he asked, reluctant to accept my help and standing on his own.

"Yeah," I said, putting my hands on my hips. "He asked me to come and find you."

"Well... thanks," he said, shifting in place. Then he looked at me with a new determination in his eyes. "I'm gonna go home!" With that, he ran off.

Timothy obviously had a sense of both bravery and pride, thinking nothing of running back through the twists and turns of the slums to get home on his own. That was probably what got him into trouble in the first place, but I couldn't help but to admire it. I followed him back to make sure that he'd stay safe, keeping out of sight as I did. Once I arrived back at the door of Timothy's mobile-home, I saw him and his mother in a tight embrace. She looked up to me with a smile, and her husband let me in.

"You did it!" the husband said, smiling ear to ear. "You really did! How can I ever repay you?"

"Just keep a good eye on your boy," I said, deciding that to be the best answer for a hero.

"I'm so sorry I mistrusted you," the wife said, still holding onto her son despite his struggle to get free. "You're welcome here any time."

"Thanks," I said, removing the helmet and handing it back to the husband. "I think this is yours."

"Oh, yes... but I have to give you something," he said, feeling around in his pockets. "Oh, when the soldiers took our son, I gave one of them a good kick. I was down and out before I knew it, but I did get him to drop this. Here, take it." The man drew a capsule from his pocket, a type of potion that I was rather familiar with.

"This... is a phoenix down!" I said, taking it and looking it over with a grin. It was a special product made by Shinra to revitalize soldiers on the battlefield. "These are pretty expensive. Are you sure?"

"It's the least we can do," he answered, gesturing back at his son and wife. "Is there anything else we can help with?"

"Well..." I thought for a moment and turned my eyes back to him. "Do you know how to get to Sector Five from here?"

"Oh, it's in the direction the troops were headed, but go north when you reach the fork in the path."

"Thanks, you've been a great help," I said, turning to leave and then freezing in place. "Oh, and have you seen anyone else wearing an old SOLDIER emblem like mine?"

"Can't say I have," he answered, scratching his head. "Not in years."

"Thanks anyway," I said. "Take care!" I ran off with a grin on my face, out of the house and west down the path. I still didn't know where Cloud was, but my mind was now focused and my direction was clearer. First I'd find Aerith, and then I'd take on the city if I had to.

The hero, Zack had returned!


	58. A SOLDIER's Alliance Part 5

**Cloud**

I'd already had a long enough by day the time AVALANCHE had made it back to the bar from their terrorist mission, but I still had what was probably one of the most annoying things left to deal with: the issue of the money. Stupidly enough, I let my trust for Tifa get in the way of negotiating a price beforehand, so now I had the joy of having to deal with the brutish leader of the group after the fact. I could hear the guy pounding away at a punching bag as I road the makeshift elevator down to AVALANCHE's secret base under the bar, and I could only hope that was because he had some energy to burn, and not because of anything putting him in a foul mood. Either way, if he tried to stiff me out of a check after what I went through, I probably would have put him through the wall at that point. He stopped the incessant punching and turned around to see me step off the elevator.

"Yo, Cloud! There's somethin' I wanna ask ya," Barret said, huffing and wheezing from his little training session. "Was there anyone from SOLDIER fighting us today?" I almost laughed, shifting in place and crossing my arms over each other.

"None," I said, shaking my head ever so slightly and closing my eyes. "I'm positive."

"You sound pretty sure." He gave the punching bag another hit, and I opened my eyes.

"If there was anyone from SOLDIER," I started, smirking just a bit, "you wouldn't be standing here now."

"Don't go thinkin' you're so bad just 'cuz you were in SOLDIER." He started to move in to pick a fight with me, but Biggs held him back from behind. I shrugged my shoulders and took a few steps away from him, and he spun around to give Biggs a good smack up against the wall before setting his gaze back on me. "Yeah, you're strong. Probably all them guys in SOLDIER are." He huffed a few more times and held up his gun-arm as though he were clenching a fist. "But don't forget that your skinny ass is workin' for AVALANCHE now! Don't get no ideas 'bout hangin' on to Shinra."

"Staying with Shinra?" I raised my voice, turning and glaring at him. "You asked me a question and I answered it. That's all." I walked in close to him, feeling the sparks flying between the two of us. "I'm going upstairs. I want to talk about my money." I watched his jaw clench up, and as I turned to leave, I saw Tifa waiting by the elevator.

"Wait, Cloud!" she said as I walked by, holding out her hand to me until Barret's words stopped her.

"Tifa! Let him go!" the guy snarled. "Looks like he still misses the Shinra!"

"Shut up!" I yelled, turning back to him. I felt my voice quiver as though I wasn't used to speaking up, but I ignored it in my anger. "I don't care about either Shinra or SOLDIER!" I stepped onto the elevator and shook my head back at the shocked faces in the room. "But don't get me wrong! I don't care about AVALANCHE or the planet for that matter!"

The elevator brought me up to the bar, but lowered again as soon as I stepped off. I didn't care to stick around to see who was following me. I didn't even care to stick around long enough to get paid at that point. As I went to leave, the elevator came back up, and I let Tifa's voice stop my feet.

"Listen, Cloud," she said softly, an uncomfortable emotion in her voice. "I'm asking you. Please join us." Her glove touched against the bare skin of my arm, and I shook my head and stepped away.

"Sorry Tifa," was my only response as I kept my back to her. I heard her step close to me again.

"The planet is dying. Slowly but surely it's dying," she said, but it seemed like she was holding something back. "Someone has to do something." I shrugged and turned around to face her.

"So let Barret and his buddies do something about it." I let my eyes trail away from her as I turned back to the door. "It's got nothing to do with me."

"So you're really leaving!" She raised her voice behind me, and I could hear that emotion again. I didn't want to stop in place, but I couldn't get myself to just leave while she spoke. "You're going to just walk right out, ignoring your childhood friend!"

"Sorry..." I repeated, turning back to her again, slower this time.

"You forgot the promise too." Her voice was quiet again, and she was waiting for me to respond.

"Promise?" I echoed, and she averted her eyes from me.

"So you _did_ forget." After a moment, she stepped up closer to me and looked me in the eyes. "Remember, Cloud? It was seven years ago..."

I knew then exactly what she was talking about. At the well in Nibelheim: the promise we made on my last night before going to join SOLDIER. All these years, I thought she'd have been the one who forgot. Standing in that doorway, ready to walk out, a sudden shame washed over me, and I wasn't even entirely sure of the reason.

"You remember now, don't you?" she asked, reading the look on my face. "Our promise?"

"I'm not a hero, and I'm not famous," I said, shaking my head and trying to pull myself together. "I can't keep... the promise."

"But you got your childhood dream, didn't you? You joined SOLDIER." She turned her expression to a hopeful smile, and I shifted to put my hand on the back of my neck. I had to admit that she was right about that. She took a few slow steps away from me and then looked back over her shoulder with that same smile. "So, come on! You've got to keep your promise."

Barret climbed the elevator shaft into the room, looking to have cooled down at least a little. I hoped he hadn't heard any of our conversation, because I was still pretty pissed at him.

"Wait a sec, big-time SOLDIER!" he shouted, despite the fact that I was right there. "A promise is a promise! Here!" He tossed a bag of gil my way and it landed on the floor by my feet. I reached down to take it, and counted it out. Fifteen-hundred.

"This is my pay?" I scoffed, pocketing the money. "Don't make me laugh."

"What?" Tifa said, looking nervous again. "Then, you'll...!"

"You got the next mission lined up?" I said, closing my eyes and flicking my wrist at the guy. "I'll do it for three-thousand."

"What...!" Barret shouted, but Tifa was quick to grab a hold on his arm.

"It's okay, it's okay," she said, then leaning in to whisper something to the guy. Honestly, I was surprised he'd be able to hear it over his own breathing, but he seemed to whisper something back before stepping away from her in consideration.

"Two-thousand!" He said, finally speaking to me again. Then he turned away to fold his arms in frustration. Tifa apparently read my face again, because she was smiling and leaning in close to me.

"Thanks, Cloud."

The next morning, the very second I woke up in the basement base, AVALANCHE's next mission commenced. Barret explained that our next target was another reactor, this time in Sector Five. We were to take a train from the station, and to deviate from the train's path once we got close to the reactor. Exactly what _that_ meant had yet to be explained. I personally thought it was a bit strange that we'd be taking a train from the same station we'd arrived at one day prior, but it didn't seem that anyone was harboring the fear of getting caught: even Tifa, who had decided to come along this time. Leaving little Marlene in charge of the bar in the slums didn't seem like the best idea to me, but I supposed that being raised as Barret's daughter may have made her a bit tougher than she looked, even at such a young age.

As we approached the train station, I had to wonder exactly why Tifa wanted to come so badly, and I could only suspect that it had something to do with keeping Barret in check and making sure I didn't change my mind about staying with them. She'd been smiling at me the entire walk, which only seemed to be annoying the big man, but perhaps he was just still frustrated about not being able to follow my explanation of how to use materia. Either way, my mind was more preoccupied with Tifa's safety. Though she told me she'd trained under a master, and though she was noticeably sporting more muscle than back when we were in Nibelheim, I still couldn't help but to think of her as that young girl I saved from the mountain.

Barret practically shoved us onto the train, one by one, and charged in after us with a big energy-pumped grin on his face.

"Yo!" he yelled, startling awake the man that was sleeping on a row of seats nearby. All the members of AVALANCHE, having only just taken seats, rose to attention. "Looks like this ain't no private car, so split up!" Biggs, Wedge and Jessie, with just a nod of their heads, ran down the car and into the next one. A well dressed man apparently took offense to our company, and started mumbling something before taking a seat. "You say somethin'?" Barret growled, running down the train car in his direction. "I said, you say somethin'?"

The suited man was becoming more and more nervous, kicking his leg as it crossed over the other one. Unfortunately for him, Barret seemed to be the type that could smell fear, and leaned on a pole nearby the man, looming over him.

"Yo, look at that!" Barret said, voice still raised even in that close proximity. "It got empty all of a sudden. What's goin' on?" Tifa was standing next to me, and looked to be getting a bit uncomfortable with Barret's hostile energy.

"I...it's empty because of... g-guys like you..." the man jumped, practically whimpering as he talked. Barret gave the pole a good smack, causing the poor man to flinch again. "You... you've seen the news, right? AVALANCHE says there will be more bombings. Only devoted employees like me would go to Midgar on a day like today."

"You workin' for Shinra?" Barret said, jumping back and pointing his gun-arm at the guy.

"I won't give in to violence..." the man said, covering his head with his arms, "and I'm not giving you my seat either!"

"Barret!" Tifa yelled, running up to his side. Barret gave her a glance, and lowered his gun-arm, cussing like there was no tomorrow. The big guy then turned around and started back down the car in my direction, and Tifa offered the suited man a bow in apology before coming back to me as well.

"So, what are we gonna do now?" I asked, crossing my arms slowly and leaning against the wall of the train.

"Shit! The hell you so calm about?" he responded, still louder than necessary. "You bustin' up my rhythm..." Before I could ask him again for a real answer, the train whistled and started to move.

"Seems like they just finished connecting the cars," Tifa observed, catching her balance after being jostled by the motion. "We're finally leaving."

"So what's are next target?" I asked, refining the question for him. I still hadn't been told what we were doing _after_ we got on the train. Barret laughed.

"Hah! Listen to Mr. Serious-about-his-work! Awright, I'll tell ya!" He straightened himself out and seemed to put on his leader face before continuing. "Jessie's probably already told you, but there's a security check point at the top plate. It's an ID scan system checkin' all the trains."

"Which Shinra is very proud of," Tifa added, locking her fingers behind her back.

"We can't use our fake IDs anymore..." Barret concluded, letting his arms drop to his sides. Just then, a voice came over the intercom on the train.

"Good morning, and welcome to Midgar lines. Arrival time at Sector Four station will be 11:45pm."

"That means we've got only three more minutes to the ID check point," Tifa said, and Barret nodded and ran halfway back down the train car before calling to us.

"Alright, in three minutes, we're jumpin' off this train. Got it!" Before I even got the chance to consider the notion of jumping off a speeding train, alarms started buzzing overhead, the lights dimmed, and passengers began to scream in surprise.

"That's odd," Tifa said, looking around the train car. "The ID check point was supposed to be further down. What's happening?"

"Type A Security Alert!" the voice announced over the intercom. "Unidentified passengers confirmed. A search of all cars will be conducted! Repeat! Type A Security Alert! Unidentified passengers confirmed. A search of all cars will be conducted!"

"What's goin' on!" Barret boomed just as Jessie ran back into the car to meet us.

"We're in trouble," she said, panting a bit as she spoke. "I'll explain later! Hurry, get to the next car!"

"Fuckin' shit! Someone blew it..." Barret grit his teeth as he followed Jessie further into the train.

"Unidentified passengers located in Car Number One," the voice said. "Preparing for Lock Down."

"Let's go! Keep it up!" Barret yelled back, and we started to run after him.

We followed Barret through the train as the voice announced the lock down of the car we'd just left. Apparently, it was a pretty quick process. Even still, I was keeping my pace a bit slower than I normally would have just so that I didn't leave Tifa behind. The train cars were pretty dark at that point, and I'd already bumped into a few people. I didn't want anything to happen to her.

Biggs, Wedge and Jessie called to us at the end of car two, and we followed them into car three just as the second lock down occurred. Finally, the lights came back on and Barret quickly surveyed his surroundings.

"Alright! We clear!" He panted and turned to Jessie, who shook her head.

"Not yet. They're starting another check. If we're caught, we're done for!" She stopped to pull herself together and gestured ahead. "But, don't worry. If we move up the train, car by car, we should get passed it!" She ran on into the next train car, and the alarms started to sound again.

"Unidentified Passengers: moving to front of train. Currently tracking location." I considered how advanced this system seemed to be over anything I'd seen in the past. Did AVALANCHE really cause enough trouble to force Shinra into advancing faster? To that end, it almost sounded like we were doing them a favor, but I couldn't stick around to think about it.

Several cars down, alarm blazing the whole way, Barret ran up to a door on the train car. When I got close to him, I could see that a couple of the nearby passengers were actually Biggs, Wedge and Jessie dressed in quick disguises.

"It's me, Jessie," said one one of the passengers in a red uniform. "How do I look, Cloud? Do I look good in a Shinra uniform?"

"Heh, you look great," I said, looking her over. "Just like a man."

"Yay! I'm so happy," she said, twisting back and forth a bit. "...I think?"

"Yo! Over here!" Barret yelled at me, despite being only a few feet away. "We're gonna dive outta here!" He pulled open the door of the train, revealing the dark, rapidly passing underground railroad tunnels. Tifa looked over her shoulder at me.

"Scary, huh?" she said, but I figured she was just looking for comfort.

"Too late to be saying that now," I responded, glancing around the area before looking her in the eyes. "Why'd you come along anyway?" She frowned and turned away from me, tilting her head to the side.

"Because..."

"Hey you two! There ain't no time for that!" Barret interrupted, and Tifa sighed and stepped over to look out the door. I followed, feeling a bit bad for how I responded to her, and for a long moment the only sound was that of the wind and metal rushing by us outside. Finally, Tifa turned around to give me a nod.

"Yeah! I've made up my mind!" she said, grinning and sounding quite proud of herself. "Watch closely. I'm gonna jump!" My eyes went wide as I watched Tifa leap out of the speeding train before I could stop her, but taking a look at everyone else, it appeared as if I was the only one who was surprised. Taking a breath, I stepped up to the door, looked over at Barret and brushed the bangs from my face, giving him a cool smile.

"You don't care if I go first?"

"A leader always stays 'til the end," he huffed. "Don't worry 'bout me. Just go!" I shrugged and turned back to the door, and I heard the man call out to me one last time over the sound of the rushing wind. "Yo! Don't go gettin' your spiky ass hurt! It's only the beginnin' of the mission!"

Despite Barret's wording, that was actually a pretty surprising sentiment coming from the man. Taking one final breath, I pushed myself forward and dove out of the train car. I wasn't too aware of everything that was rushing by me as I flew through the darkened subway, and before I knew it, I was rolling along a metal floor, slowly losing momentum until I came to a stop near a pillar between the two tracks. The landing was less than graceful, but I was satisfied just to have learned that the floor wasn't made of rocks and gravel. When I got to my feet, I could see Tifa walking my direction from further back on the track. Judging by the lack of any visible damage to her bare arms, she'd probably managed the jump better than I did. Barret approached the two of us from just ahead.

"Good. So far everything's going as planned," he said with a scary grin. I wasn't really sure how getting detected and jumping out of a train was part of the plan, but I supposed I'd give him the benefit of the doubt. He walked a little bit further down the track and gave me and Tifa a look. "Better not let your guard down 'til we get to the Sector Five reactor. Biggs, Wedge and Jessie got everything ready for us, so move it."

"Well, the reactor's just down this tunnel," Tifa said, and started to lead the way. I couldn't help but to find myself impressed with her. I'd never known a Tifa that could fight and jump out of moving trains. However, being capable of such things only meant that she'd be putting herself in more dangerous situations, at least while she was teaming up with AVALANCHE. I'd have to be sure to keep an eye on her.

A ways down the tunnel, we came to a section of the track being blocked by five beams of green light. I recognized the technology, but I hadn't ever seen anything like that used in the subway system.

"Those light beams are Shinra's security sensors," I said, looking them over before turning to face the other two. "We can't go any further."

"Dammit! That must've been what detected us on the way here!" Barret said, swinging his arms about. "Is there another way around?"

"Hmm." I took a look around the area, and my eyes locked onto an open grate on the lower portion of the wall. It was probably a ventilation shaft, and could very well lead us straight to the reactor, depending on our current location. As I bent down to get a better look, I could already tell that the big man was getting flustered.

"That's one damn tiny hole," Barret said, actually sounding a bit panicked. "You tellin' me to squeeze into that to get under the Plate? No way!" Tifa leaned in to get a look into the grate with me.

"There seems to be nothing that'll get us stuck in this duct..." she observed, looking to me for second opinions.

"Yeah, but if we go down there, we won't be able to come back up here." I turned my head back to glance at Barret. He was clearly afraid of small spaces, or very sure that it was impossible to make himself any sort of small, and his face was twisting about in all sorts of ways. He started pacing to the right, then to the left, and finally swung his arms toward me as if to hurry me up.

"Don't be wastin' time," he grumbled, giving in to my plan. "Never know when the Shinra'll find us."

"Okay," Tifa said, smiling at me. I leaned in and started to slide down the duct, Tifa following me, and Barret going last.

"But, damn man," I could hear Barret say from behind me. "This thing gives me the chills."

The duct dropped us down into a lower portion of a ventilation system as I'd suspected, and I began following it towards the sounds of machines I could hear in the distance. The ventilation shaft led to a ladder, and then another ladder, and finally into a wide open area; an elevated section of steel walkways, boxes, ladders and stairs. It was definitely different than the last reactor we'd been to, but there was no doubt in my mind that we'd found the right place. As I reached the bottom of the ladder and stepped onto the walkway, I could smell the mako in the air. The weird thing was, there didn't seem to be a single guard around the area, and I'd half expected the army to be alerted to our presence just because of how loud Barret had been breathing.

"Well, here we are!" Barret said, taking a deep breath of the mako and stepping past me. "And looks like the Shinra ain't expectin' us." Just as he finished talking, a clanking sound caught our attention as a man stumbled out from around a nearby corner. Barret had his gun-arm trained on the guy before we even had the chance to realize who it was. Wedge was standing before us, and he threw his arms up into the air to beg Barret not to shoot. Biggs and Jessie stepped out from the same place.

"The train went into another level of lock down and stopped further down the tunnel," Biggs explained as his leader lowered the gun. "We took the opportunity to sneak off and meet you guys here."

"Glad you could make it!" Tifa smiled.

"Let's keep this movin'!" Barret swung his arm and pressed passed the still startled Wedge. "We got a reactor to blow!"

I followed Barret and the others ahead, still suspicious of the lack of security. In the past, Shinra reactors weren't known to have too many men stationed on the inside, but I couldn't believe that they wouldn't have upped the defenses to combat a terrorist group. It just didn't make any sense. I was broken from my thought as Jessie walked up beside me, talking to me as we moved.

"I'm sorry," she started, and all I could do was look at her in question. She could obviously tell from my expression that I was confused, and she hung her head to elaborate. "The ID scan problem on the train was all my fault. I made your ID card special, so that's why it happened..." She shook her head, keeping her voice down presumably so Barret couldn't hear her. "I put my heart into making it, but I failed." I felt like I should have said something to her. I know I should have, but I was too concerned with what was going on around us.

As we proceeded further on, the place definitely started to look more like a reactor. We made our way down stairs and ladders and deep into the depths where we had placed our bomb at the last location, and still we faced no opposition. Suddenly, just as we were walking along the bridge towards our target, a ringing started to sound in my head, quickly reaching a deafening pitch. That was the same ringing that I'd heard at the same spot in the last reactor, except this time it was so much worse. I jerked forward, grabbing my head and falling to the floor. I wasn't sure if anyone said anything as I fell, because all sound was being completely drowned out, and my vision faded to black.

After a moment, I looked back up. I was still in a reactor, but it wasn't the same one. It was... it was Nibelheim. I could see Tifa before me, a young Tifa leaned over her dead father. She started to speak, but I could barely make out the words over my own heartbeat. Then, I heard her say _Sephiroth_, and things felt more clear and more confusing at the same time.

"Sephiroth... SOLDIER... Mako reactors... Shinra... Everything!" Tifa said, tears building with her anger. "I hate them all!" She stood up from her father's body and started to run.

I blinked my eyes once, and I was back to reality. Tifa was still in front of me, but she was wearing her new clothes, and she was older. My head hurt, but I made it to my feet and shook it out. What the hell _was_ that?

"Damn man, get a hold of yourself!" Barret said from somewhere next to me. I couldn't see Biggs, Wedge or Jessie around, so I figured they must have stayed behind to keep watch. Tifa offered me a hand and a concerned look.

"You all right?" she asked, and I nodded, brushing myself off.

"Tifa," I started, still trying to process what just happened. She tilted her head with a 'Mmm?', waiting for me to continue, but I thought better of it. "No... forget it. Come on, let's hurry!"

Tifa gave me another concerned look, but allowed me to move ahead as I armed the bomb, fastening it to a vital section of the Mako processor. As the bomb clicked into place, we all paused, waiting for the alarm to go off, but it didn't.

"Oh yeah!" Barret pumped his arm in the air with a massive grin. "Now let's get the hell outta here so we can watch the fireworks!"

On his word, we all started to run. I kept my guard up the whole time we were escaping from the place. Every ladder we took, I expected to be ambushed by the Robo-Guards, or to find army-modified monsters around any corner. Every time I thought there would be something trying to stop us, there wasn't. I almost found myself relaxing by the end. We'd made it onto the bridge out of the reactor, and still there were no threats. I didn't think that Shinra would have waited that long to attack us, but then my ears picked up a sound.

"This way!" Barret yelled, leading us in the direction of the closest exit, and there they were. A large group of Shinra's advanced infantrymen emerged, all dawning red uniforms and training there guns on us. "Shinra soldiers!" Barret said in surprise, taking a step back and readying his own gun. "Shit! What the hell's goin' on?"

"A trap..." I said, slowly reaching for my sword. As I prepared to fight, the sound of footsteps could be heard down the hall from where we came. I turned to look, and Barret and Tifa followed. Who we saw approaching us, I could barely believe.

"Presi... President Shinra?" Barret exclaimed, his arms dropping to his sides.

"Why is the President here?" Tifa asked, stepping in closer to me and raising her fists.

"Hmm..." President Shinra ran a finger and a thumb down his mustache as he looked us over. He seemed far too calm for my tastes. "So you all must be that... what was it?"

"AVALANCHE!" Barret shouted, throwing his fist up in the air. "And don't ya forget it!" The infantry clicked their guns in warning, but the President himself didn't even flinch. "And you're President Shinra, huh?"

I took a few slow steps towards the man in his red, expensive suit. All the guns now turned to me, but my attention was elsewhere. It seemed there was no use in trying to keep a low profile at that point.

"Long time no see, President," I said, staring him in the eyes. I watched his eyebrow raise as he considered my words.

"...Long time no see? Oh... you," He tilted his head back a bit, his look turning to disgust. "You're the one who quit SOLDIER and joined AVALANCHE. I knew you'd been exposed to Mako from the look in your eyes..." He brought his head forward again, trying to match the intensity of my stare. "Tell me, traitor... what was your name?"

"Cloud," I answered plainly, fighting the urge to charge the man. It suddenly felt like he'd taken so much away from me, even more than I knew he had.

"Forgive me for asking," he laughed gruffly, "but I can't be expected to remember each person's name. Unless you become another Sephiroth."

I froze at the mention of that name. For some reason, the sound of it made my body feel weak and my head ache. The President seemed to note my reaction, and continued on.

"Yes, Sephiroth... he was brilliant." He turned his head up, as though reflecting on old times. "Perhaps too brilliant..."

"...Sephiroth?" I repeated, trying to understand why I felt so helpless against just a name. I took a step back, and Barret pushed past me. I heard the guns click again.

"Don't give a damn 'bout none of that!" Barret snarled, swinging his gun-arm. "This place's goin' up with a big bang soon! Serves y'all right!"

"And such a waste of good fireworks," the President sighed, shaking his head and looking down at his feet, "just to get rid of vermin like you..."

"_Vermin_! That's all you can say... _vermin_!" Barret stomped his foot down so hard that the bridge below us shook a bit. "Y'all Shinra're the _vermin_, killing the planet! And that makes you _King Vermin_! So shu'up jackass!"

"...You are beginning to bore me." Shinra shrugged his shoulders after a moment as the sound of a helicopter drew closer. "I'm a very busy man, so if you'll excuse me... I have a dinner I must attend."

"Dinner!" Barret yelled, stepping closer. "Don't gimme that! I ain't even started wit' you yet!"

"But, I've made arrangements for a playmate for you all," the President continued, ignoring the angry man's complaints. Then, he snapped his fingers.

"What's that noise?" Tifa said, looking down the other side of the bridge. There was a definite mechanical sound getting closer, as something with treads was approaching from a darkened tunnel. Barret ran up to Tifa's side, shaking his fist.

"The hell is this!"

The sound was not treads, but the motor on a giant hovering robot, unlike anything I'd seen in Shinra. The thing charged right at us, and both Tifa and Barret had to dive out of the way to avoid it. It stopped right between me and the other two, and the President continued.

"Meet 'Airbuster', a techno-soldier. Our Weapon Development Department created him." Shinra cleared his throat a bit, looking quite pleased with himself. "I'm sure the data he'll extract from your dead bodies will be of great use to us in future experiments."

"Techno-soldier?" I questioned, and a helicopter rose up from underneath the bridge, door open to the President's side.

"Now then, if you'll excuse me." Shinra stepped onto his ride, and it took off. I started to run in to try and intercept the helicopter, but Barret called after me.

"Yo, Cloud! We've gotta do somethin' 'bout him!"

I turned around to be reminded of Airbuster as it was closing in on Tifa and Barret.

"Help, Cloud!" Tifa yelled, stepping back and readying for battle. "_This_ is from SOLDIER?"

"No way!" I said, running up behind it and drawing my blade. "It's just a machine."

"I don't care what it is!" Barret growled as Airbuster turned to face me. "I'm gonna bust him up!"

The techno-soldier started vibrating faster as it readied itself for battle, raising its massive metal fists in my direction. It through a punch and I ducked it. A second punch was also easily avoided, but dented the rail on the bridge to my left side. The attacks were slow enough, but clearly had some power behind them, so I didn't want to take any risks trying to get close to it. That's when Tifa ran up behind the thing and unleashed a combo of punches that made me cringe as the metal clanged against the attack. Her final move was a jump kick that managed to push the robot towards me, and I used the opportunity to land a clean blow with the Buster Sword. Apparently less interested in me, Airbuster slowly turned around to face Tifa and Barret. Barret released a stream of cusses and bullets, but Airbuster just started charging the two of them in slow bursts of speed, shaking the bridge as he scraped against the sides.

I ran in again for another attack, still finding myself far too overprotective of Tifa to concentrate well in a fight. My blade dug into the metal of the robot, but then two small machine guns emerged from its back and started to fire at me. I had to backpedal to avoid the bullets, which seemed to cause Tifa to start pounding on the enemy again. It was almost as if she was trying to be protective of _me_. Barret joined in the attack, but the two had to dive out of the way as Airbuster made a buzzing noise and launched a small bomb in their direction. The explosion shook the bridge, and the robot turned around to launch another bomb _my_ way. Instead of dodging, I ran forward and sliced straight through the bomb. The pieces blew up at either side of me, damaging the bridge but leaving me unscathed.

Airbuster had turned around to face the other two again, but before it could try and keep me busy with its machine guns, I sliced the things right off its back, causing a small explosion. The robot jerked around after the explosion, and Barret took that as an opportunity to approach the thing, pumping bullets into it the whole way. Tifa ran along side him, smashing her fist into the center of the bot's torso piece. There was silence for just a moment, and then the robot started to buzz, and vibrate faster, and all of a sudden, sparks were flying off it in every direction. It looked like we'd beaten it, despite how great the President made it sound.

"Yo! It's gonna blow!" Barret yelled, grabbing Tifa and trying to make some distance between them and the malfunctioning Airbuster. The robot was too big for me to try and get by and join the others, so I dove in the opposite direction in an attempt to avoid the inevitable boom. Perhaps I dove too late.

As the deafening explosion through me up into the air, I heard the bridge creak and snap underneath me. The air was filled with fire and lightning and debris from our enemy, so I couldn't even tell if the other two were safe. Trying to get a hold of myself, even as I fell injured through the air, I grabbed for the first bit of support that I could find. When I could finally tell what was going on, I was clinging to a pipe that was jutting out of the now broken bridge, staring down a massive drop beneath me. I looked up, and I could see Tifa and Barret standing at the other side of the bridge, but they were out of arm's reach.

"Barret! Can't you do something?" I heard Tifa say over the lingering rumble from the blast. She got down on all fours, trying to figure out a way she could reach me. I still felt injured from the explosion, and my arm was already beginning to hurt. It wasn't right... with all that SOLDIER training, I should have been able to pull myself back up onto the bridge with no problem. Why was I feeling so weak?

"Not a damn thing," Barret answered after a moment, shaking his head. Tifa looked like she was becoming frantic.

"Cloud! Please don't die! You can't die!" Tifa yelled down to me, straining her voice. "There's still so much I want to tell you!"

"I know, Tifa..." I responded, trying to keep the pain out of my voice. Maybe after a minute, I could find the strength to climb back up.

"Hey, you gonna be alright?" Barret called, sounding particularly nervous for a tough guy like him. I paused as I considered his words. The muscles in my arm began to shake, even as I responded.

"You worry about yourselves!" I called back, looking up at the pipe that I clung to. "I'm all right, but take care of Tifa!"

"...Alright," Barret said almost too quiet for me to hear. "Sorry 'bout all this."

"Stop talking like this is the end!" I said, wincing and throwing my other arm up to get a better hold on the pipe.

I started to feel my strength returning, and just for a moment I thought I was going to be okay, but then I got a harsh reminder of why Barret was nervous in the first place. Another explosion sounded in the distance, beginning in the belly of the reactor, and quickly moving it's way towards us. It was the bomb that we'd placed inside. I'd forgotten about it in all the chaos. Panicked, I quickly tried to pull myself up, but the rumbling explosion shook the bridge and threw me off the pipe. I heard Tifa scream as I reached through the air to try and find anything to stop myself from falling. There was nothing. I was dropping down, faster and faster, further and further, until the image of Tifa reaching for me was nothing but a dot in the distance, and even the reactor itself was engulfed in fiery smoke.

I supposed that was it, falling so far and so fast. Even a SOLDIER first class wouldn't be able to survive such a deep drop into the darkness of the slums. It was strange: in a time like that, only moments from death, I'd thought I'd be able to gather my thoughts, to have that last image that went through my head before the end. I thought I'd think of Tifa, or my childhood, or maybe I'd consider how I never really got revenge on Shinra, or that I'd never even made a name for myself. But I couldn't even think of my own name, and my final thoughts were anything but focused. There was a face: someone who I was thinking of, but... did I even know them?

The image grew clearer as my mind grew blank, but before I could tell exactly what it was, a noise rung through my head, my vision finally faded, and the image was lost to nothingness.


	59. A SOLDIER's Alliance Part 6

**Zack**

After quite some time of walking, two things had become very apparent to me: Sector Four was a big place, and I was completely lost. Following the directions I'd been given took me a ways in the right direction, but I couldn't help but feel I'd doubled back on my own footsteps at least a few times. At the same time, nothing I saw looked familiar, but it was not an easy task to find something recognizable about mounds of metal and trash. Groaning a frustrated groan, I finally stopped to rest my back against the side of a broken construction vehicle, letting myself slide down until I was sitting in the dirt. It was a pretty embarrassing thing being a SOLDIER first class, or an ex-SOLDIER rather, who could get so hopelessly lost in the city he was most familiar with. It was nearly enough to knock all the wind out of my sails I'd gotten from the sheer joy of still being alive.

After a moment of sitting and considering my next plan of action, I heard the sound of multiple boots scuffing about just a bit further ahead of me. At that point, it didn't really matter to me whether the people I was hearing were friendly locals or a band of thugs, I was going to get them to give me some directions either way. Leaping up from my slump on the ground, I started running in the direction of the sound, for fear of losing track of it. When I got closer, I stopped myself so abruptly that I nearly fell over, freezing in place and hoping that the people ahead didn't hear me. It was a group of four infantrymen, guns out and escorting what appeared to be another hostage further into the slums. Shinra never used to take prisoners like that, at least as far as I knew, and it was really beginning to tick me off.

"Hey, you boys!" I shouted, raising a hand up next to my mouth. The four armed men and their prisoner all turned my way, both confused and surprised. "Any of you know which way to Sector Five?"

"W-who is that?" one of the infantrymen said, leaning in close to another one. I took that moment to realize that I was no longer in a goofy superhero mask, and decided that I probably shouldn't wait for them to come to a conclusion.

"I don't know," the other man responded, his confusion causing him to miss the fact that I was running his way. "But isn't that a SOL...!?"

Before the two closest men could even finish that thought, I ran up to them and smashed their heads together so hard that their helmets cracked. Needless to say, they were out cold. I caught one of the men's weapons as it fell through the air, and promptly applied the butt of the rifle to the chin of the closest remaining soldier, knocking him back into a pile of old cans and computer pieces. The last infantryman met my gaze for only a moment before pulling out his gun and firing like crazy in my direction. With an aim like his, all I needed to do was to turn around and let the Tsurugi sword guard my back against the barrage. Finally, the inevitable click sounded, telling the man that he had to reload. A well-trained infantryman could reload in roughly three seconds. At close range, a SOLDIER first class could dispense of at least one infantryman in only _one_ second, and _that's_ on an off day.

Once the last of the four escorts had skidded to a stop from my finishing kick, I stretched my arms for a moment and turned back to look at the ex-prisoner. He was sort of a skinny guy with red hair, a leather coat and some sunglasses to match. Why anyone would need a pair of shades in the slums was beyond me.

"_Well_... thanks for that!" he said, brushing himself off as though he'd been the one doing the work.

"All in a days work!" I said, letting a grin take over my face. "Just stay out of trouble." I turned away and began to walk, but then I stopped as I heard him speak back up.

"Were you serious? About the directions?" he said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "'cause I'm headed to Sector Six. I could take you to Five on my way."

"Seriously?" I said, spinning around to face him. In all my glory, I'd forgotten that I needed directions. "That would be a lot of help!"

"Yeah," he confirmed, kicking up a little bit of dirt with his shoe as he spoke. "I wouldn't have even been in this sector if they didn't make me for an AVALANCHE supporter. That's what I get, I guess: open up my mouth and end up being escorted to 'camp'."

"Camp?" I questioned, already not liking the sound of it. The guy nodded.

"Yeah, they got a place where they're taking all the Shinra haters for questioning. Haven't heard of anyone coming back from there either."

"Hmmm..." I shut my eyes and crossed my arms, considering my next decision carefully. "On second thought, can you point me in the direction of that camp?"

"I can do more than that," he answered, removing his hands from his pockets. "I can take you there."

"It's probably pretty dangerous," I said, looking him over. "It's better if I go alone."

"I want to go," was his response.

"Why?" I asked, tilting my head at him. I'd only just freed this guy and now he wanted to go straight to the place he was being taken to? He just looked at me for a long moment, his face going still and serious, and finally he smiled.

"Because I _am_ an AVALANCHE supporter."

"Okay. Fine," I said, letting my arms fall to my sides and walking closer to him. I wasn't sure how I felt about hanging around someone who was supporting terrorists, but at the moment we were allies who shared a common enemy. "The name's Zack, by the way."

"I'm Johnny."

Johnny led me on from there, in the direction his captors had been taking him. He traversed the slums at a much faster rate than I had been earlier, but I only found it refreshing to be moving at the new pace. For the most part, we'd been keeping our voices down and our eyes out just in case we'd run into another group of infantrymen, but after a bit of time went by, Johnny decided to break that silence.

"So," he began, letting a pause go by before saying anything else, "where are you headed in Sector Five?"

"Just about anywhere you can lead me to, I guess." I clambered over an old refrigerator to continue to follow the guy. It seemed as though it was necessary to climb the junk mounds just to get to certain places in Sector Four. That explained why I was so lost when trying to follow the paths. "I know my way around there a bit better than here."

"I meant more like... what do you _want_ in Sector Five?" He looked back at me to make sure I was keeping up, and then hopped forward onto a large piece of metal debris. "There isn't really a whole lot there. All the good stuff is in Six and Seven."

"I'm... visiting a friend," I explained, trying to keep at least some level of secrecy. It didn't seem to matter as Johnny started on another tangent.

"I actually came from Sector Seven, myself. I took a secret passage by the subways, but there wasn't a direct entrance to Six." He hopped again onto another large, rusty sheet of metal and started to make his way down the other side of the mound. "I had to keep going and leave the passage into Sector Five, and that's when the Shinra guys found me."

"So they just took you for questioning without a motive?" I asked, following him down. He shrugged.

"Well, they may have taken me 'cause I said I thought AVALANCHE was doing a good thing, _or_ they might have known that I was close to the group." He stepped down onto the path, keeping an eye out for infantrymen, and gestured for me to keep following. "I actually used to hang out right by their base, in a bar owned by this girl named..."

"Wait..." I interrupted, closing some space between us and walking up next to him. "You know where AVALANCHE's base is!?"

"Yeah, but I'll never give it up!" he said quickly, sounding like he thought I was about to interrogate him.

"Weren't you just about to...?" I questioned, tilting my head at the guy. "Never mind. Guess it's a good thing I found you."

"Yeah, but I was a little bit confused when you attacked those guys," Johnny said, taking me around the next corner. "That's a SOLDIER uniform, right?"

"An old one," I confirmed, brushing my outfit off a bit. "I don't suppose you've seen anyone else wearing a similar one, have you?"

"There it is!" he said, stopping abruptly and pointing ahead. An infantry encampment was set up right in the middle of the slums. It looked like they had mobile-homes set up there, but after further inspection, I could see that some of them looked like mobile prison rooms. That must have been where they were putting the people they captured. "Now before you tell me to wait here, I'm telling you I want to help."

"Hmmm." I considered whether or not to suggest that he reconsider, but then decided that there was no point in trying to stop him. Johnny seemed like a pretty stubborn guy, and for all I knew, he was actually pretty good at this sort of thing. After a moment of thought, I looked back at him. "Well then, got any ideas for a good battle plan?"

"Battle plan? Actually... yeah! Yeah, I think I might!" he said, starting to feel around in his pockets. "I could climb up one of the nearby junk piles and count out how many guards are in the camp. Then, I could distract them to give you an opening, using these." He pulled out a couple of grenades, and it was enough to make me jump. "A girl back in Sector Seven gave 'em to me just before I left."

"Nice gift," I said with a laugh, turning my eyes back to the encampment. "Sounds like a plan. I'll wait here until I get a signal from you."

"Alright," he agreed with a decisive nod. "I'll let you know how many I count." With that, he started off towards the camp, staying hidden behind the larger pieces of junk as he climbed to a higher viewpoint.

A minute or two later, I saw Johnny raise both of his hands up, discretely giving me the number of opposition. He held one finger up on one hand, and five on the other. Six infantrymen wouldn't be much of a problem for me, even if I hadn't had someone who was gonna create a distraction. Still, I waited it out at my position until I heard the noise of the first grenade.

Following a rather loud 'boom', panicked voices and orders could be heard within the camp. The grenade went off at the other end of the camp, so I was pretty sure I would be able to enter the place with everyone's backs turned to me. Sure enough, as I ran in as quietly as I could, there were the six infantrymen, backs facing me and completely clueless to my presence. Too easy.

A second grenade went off, the explosion masking the sound of me hitting two of the men's heads together. I turned a third man around just to give him a quick punch and kick combo, and drew the First Tsurugi to dispatch the fourth and fifth as they quickly turned to face me.

"One of you locate the source the attacks!" the last man ordered, unaware that his men were unconscious. "It looks like it might only be one..." He stopped talking as he turned around to see me, and just stared at me for a long moment. I grinned at him, holding the fusion sword over my shoulder, and finally swung the blunt side of the weapon into him like a baseball bat.

For a few moments, I felt very content with the situation. Then, I heard someone call out from behind me.

"Hey, you there!" A voice called. I heard the click of several guns, and didn't even take the time to turn around. Diving to the side, I just avoided the spray of bullets that came from behind me. A number of infantrymen had almost gotten the drop on me, and I could only wonder where they came from. My roll took me to some cover next to one of the mobile-homes, and I took a few deep breaths. I peeked out for just a moment to try and see how many men where waiting for me, but I had to pull myself back to safety as they fired again. These guys weren't pulling any punches. I wondered if they thought I was part of AVALANCHE or something.

Surveying the area around me, I got an idea for a different approach to the situation, and stood up from my place on the ground. Using just one arm, I hoisted myself up onto the top of the mobile-home and kept low. It looked like there were nine infantrymen all waiting for me to peek my head back out from around that corner. Looked like I was gonna have to be quick.

Throwing myself at the men from the roof of the mobile-home, I yelled out a sort of battle cry and began to spin my body and my sword like a propeller. Bullets ricocheted off the metal of the First Tsurugi as I cut into the center of their formation, throwing army men this way and that. I came out of the spin with a kick to the dead center of the closest man's chest, and gracefully dispatched the remnants with a few targeted slashes. Despite being on the dizzy side, I was quite proud of myself as I watched every man hit the ground even before his own bullet shells. I flipped the fusion sword in my hands and returned it to my back, and Johnny emerged moments later.

"Wow, those were some serious moves!" he said with a hand on his forehead, laughing a bit as he stepped over one of the unconscious soldiers.

"_Six_ men?" was all I could say to the guy. "I think you miscounted a bit!"

"No, no, no!" he responded, holding the same fingers into the air. "_One_, _five_. Fifteen!" He wiggled the fingers as though it would help his point.

I was pretty sure that wasn't the proper way to signal, but then I wasn't very used to working with other people during my missions. That was more of a Turk thing. I'd have to be sure to ask Tseng about it the next time I saw him. Oh right, we were enemies now.

"Okay, whatever." I shrugged and started pointing to the mess of infantrymen around Johnny's feet. "Take their guns away, and I'll start freeing the captives."

"Yes'sir!" he said with a sloppy salute, then proceeding to relieve our friends of their weapons.

I turned myself around and walked in the direction of the mobile cells, looking them over as I came to the first door. Their was a lock on it, but the most simple one possible. It was a code box without a programed code: basically a door that could only be opened from one side. I wondered why Shinra would keep them in such low security, almost as if they didn't even matter. Then it came to me; they were just using these innocent people as bait to draw AVALANCHE out of hiding. What else would the company be willing to do just to defeat this one group?

I opened the first door, then walked to the next one, and then the third. Slowly, the people started to come out of the cells, looking just about as confused as I expected them to be. I cleared my throat to catch their attention, and planted my hands on my hips.

"This is a rescue!" I spoke loud and proud, and already the murmuring began amongst the crowd. "You've just been saved by the heroes, Zack and Johnny!" I gestured off to the red-headed man with his arms full of guns, and shades over his eyes. "Please make your way back to your homes, and stay safe!"

Most of the people started to leave immediately, some exchanging happy hugs before they went, but a few stuck around just long enough to offer an applause. I had to admit, I really soaked in all of that applause. Johnny seemed to be enjoying it as well. _That_ was when I really started to feel like I was alive.

About an hour later, Johnny came to a stop just ahead of me as he guided me through the slums. He turned around with a smile and pointed to a large, dark metal structure going all the way up to the plate.

"And by passing that pillar, we've arrived at Sector Five." He looked satisfied with himself, but his expression changed as he scratched at the back of his neck. "You sure you don't want to go all the way to Six?"

"I'm sure," I confirmed, taking in the more familiar scenery. I'd been through that place before. "I've still got someone I have to see."

"Right, your friend. Well, I'm actually gonna miss you on the road." He put his hands in his pockets and kicked up a bit of dirt, obviously feeling a little awkward about what he was saying. "Today was pretty hardcore."

"Heh, I guess it was." I crossed my arms, thinking back over what we'd accomplished. I was definitely not keeping my head down at that point. Tseng would want to kill me if he knew everything I was getting myself into, but it felt pretty nice. And hey, at least Shinra wouldn't be able to convince everyone that I died while out on duty.

"Hey, tell you what," Johnny said, bringing his eyes up from the ground. "If you're ever in the Wall Market, ask around about me. I'm gonna try to get a bar-tending job there. Maybe even start my own place."

"I will." I pointed my finger at the guy as I stepped back a few times in the direction I would be headed. I gave him one last smile and turned around to head off. "Good luck out there!"

"Hey Zack!" Johnny said, and I turned around just in time to catch an object he'd thrown at me. I jumped a bit as I realized it was a grenade, but it was safe.

"You'll need it more than I will," he said with a smile and a wave, turning to walk away down his own path. "Thanks again."

I grinned and pocketed the grenade, turning back and picking my pace up to a run. I felt so full of energy now, and I knew Aerith was so close. I was gonna take my life back by storm!

It was only moments before the roads became even more familiar, and a friendly sight emerged before me. There it was, in the distance: the only place where you could find flowers growing in the slums. It was Aerith's church. I was back!


	60. A SOLDIER's Memory Part 1

**Cloud**

Everything was quiet. The last memory I had was watching the Sector Five Mako reactor disappearing into smoke and Tifa reaching out to me, yelling words I couldn't hear. I was falling, then I shut my eyes. After that, what felt like long after, the sensation of falling had left me, and I'd become comfortable. My eyes stayed shut, and despite my feeling of awareness, I had no idea whether or not I was conscious or even alive. I felt around in the darkness and a strange warmth overtook me. It was then that I heard the sound of a familiar voice speaking to me: a soft male voice that I couldn't quite place.

"You all right?" the voice asked. He sounded nice and friendly, but I wasn't sure that I knew him. "Can you hear me?"

"Yeah..." I answered. Even my own voice felt surreal, as though it wasn't coming from me.

"Back then, you could only get by with skinned knees." he said, a laugh hidden behind his words. I found myself questioning him even more.

"What do you mean by 'back then'?"

"What about now?" the voice asked, sounding a bit more serious. "Can you get up?"

"What do you mean by 'back then'?" I asked again. "What about now?"

"Don't worry about me. Just worry about yourself now."

"I'll give it a try..." I said, attempting to feel my own body. I tried moving my arm and my hand, and then tried to get up, but I had no concept of where my body was or in what position.

"Oh! It moved!" another voice exclaimed out of nowhere. This voice was female, and I knew I'd heard it before as well.

"How about that?" I questioned, still trying to move myself around.

"Take it slow," the male voice answered. "Little by little..."

"Hello, hello?" the female voice called, but she felt further away.

"I know..." I responded to the man. "Hey... who are you?"

"Hello, hello!"

My eyes slowly eased open, the glare of sunlight leaving me blind for a few moments. I blinked my eyes once, and the face of a girl started to come into focus. I thought at first that it was Tifa, but it didn't seem quite right. I blinked a second time, so I could better see the girl who was leaning over me. She had a soft smile on her face, and a pink bow tide in her brown hair that hung just over my forehead. I twitched my arm a little bit, feeling the strength trying to return to my muscles. She leaned back away from me as I managed to sit myself up. A soreness ran through my shoulders and lower back, but I should have been in a much worse condition after what just happened.

"You okay?" I heard her ask from behind me. I shifted to look back at her. She was standing now, wearing a pink dress that matched the ribbon in her hair, and a pair of brown boots that just didn't seem to match at all. She looked familiar, but I was still having a hard time orienting myself.

"This is a church in the Sector Five slums," she said, almost as though she could read my mind. I took a look around the place as she gestured. It really was a church. I wasn't used to seeing them in Midgar. "You came crashing down right in front of me. You really gave me a scare."

"I came 'crashing down'?" I questioned, remembering my long fall. She gave me an emphasized nod to confirm.

"The roof and flower bed must have broken your fall," she considered aloud. "You're lucky."

"Flower bed..." I shook my head a bit and gazed over the ground beneath me. I was resting on a garden of beautiful yellow flowers, soaking in sunlight. "Is this yours?" I stood up briskly, brushing myself off and pulling myself together. "Sorry about that."

"That's all right," she said with a shrug. "The flowers here are quite resilient because this is a sacred place." She turned away from me, taking a few steps along the old wooden floor. "They say you can't grow grass and flowers in Midgar, but for some reason, the flowers have no trouble blooming here." She took a few more steps and stared upward towards the hole in the ceiling, presumably where I fell through. "I love it here."

I shrugged a bit, not really knowing what to say. I felt very much out of my territory, and I think she sensed that as she took that moment to walk back towards me and started tending to the flowers near my feet. I stepped out of the garden and watched her for a few moments.

"So, we meet again," she said as she worked, not even looking back at me. I paused, turning away and placing my hand on my chin. I knew she was familiar, but I still couldn't quite place it. "Don't you remember me?"

"Yeah, I remember," I said, feeling the memory come back to me. "You were selling flowers."

"Oh! I'm so happy!" she said, standing and bouncing on her tip toes a bit. "Thanks for buying my flowers." Almost as though she'd reminded herself, she quickly leaned back down to tend to the garden. Standing again after just a second. "Say, do you have any materia?"

"Yes, some," I answered, holding my wrist forward to display the materia equipped to my accessory. "Nowadays you can find materia anywhere."

"But mine is special," she said with a shake of her head. Then the fake serious expression she donned started to crack, and she let out a soft laugh. "It's good for absolutely nothing."

"Good for nothing?" I questioned, never having heard of such a thing. "You probably just don't know how to use it."

"No, I do..." she said, shaking her head again. "It just doesn't do anything." She smiled once more, and her eyes started to drift. "I feel safe just having it. It was my mother's..." She stopped talking to look back up at the hole in the ceiling and the light that was pouring through, then back at me. "Say, I feel like talking. Do you feel up to it?" It was an awfully strange question to be asked. Weren't we already talking? She cocked her head at me. "After all, here we are meeting again, right?"

"I don't mind," I said with a shrug. I wasn't really sure why that was my answer, as I probably had more important things to be doing, but something about this girl made me feel relaxed. Her smile broadened, and she raised up one finger in front of her face.

"Wait here. I've got to check my flowers," she said, turning away and leaning back over the flower bed. "It'll be just a minute."

I watched her walk back and forth from flower to flower, inspecting some of them, pulling debris out of others. A few times, it looked like she was whispering to the plants. Something about that place felt very surreal. I should have been very hurt or dead from that fall, but there I was: standing tall and making small talk. My shoulders didn't even hurt anymore.

"Just a little longer," she updated me, and then quickly stood up and turned my way. "Oh! Now that I think about it... we don't know each other's names, do we?" She waved her finger at me as she spoke, as though she'd made some kind of revelation. "I'm Aerith, the flower girl. Nice to meet you."

"The name's Cloud," I said, standing taller as I spoke my name. I nearly introduced myself as a SOLDIER first class, but I quickly reminded myself that those days were long gone. "Me? I do a little bit of everything."

"Oh, a jack of all trades," she said, laughing a bit. I nodded.

"Yeah, I do whatever's needed." She continued to laugh, and I threw my hands out to my sides. "What's so funny? What are you laughing at?" She stopped and shook her head.

"Sorry, I just..." She went silent before the answer, her eyes turning to a man that stood just past the doors inside the church. I turned to look at him as well. He was a sketchy looking figure with red hair and wearing an unkempt suit. I didn't like the look of him or how he was just standing there, smiling at the two of us, so I decided to get closer and let him know that.

"Cloud! Don't let him get to you!" Aerith called to me as I went. I stopped, looking back and giving her a confident shrug of my shoulders to let her know that I knew what I was doing. She shook her head in disagreement, and took a couple of quick steps up to me, clasping her hands in front of her chest. "Say, Cloud. Have you ever been a bodyguard?" She waited a moment for me to process the question. "You _do_ do everything, right?"

"Yeah, that's right," I confirmed, scratching at the back of my neck. Did she know this guy?

"Then, get me out of here,"she said with a nod, taking one step closer to me. "Take me home." I looked her over for a second, wondering exactly how much I'd be getting myself into by agreeing. But then, I thought, this sort of work has been what I planned on doing since the beginning.

"Okay, I'll do it," I said, giving her a stern look so she'd know I wasn't finished, "but it'll cost you." She shifted around for a moment, considering my words.

"Well then, let's see..." A smile slowly formed on her face, and she leaned in closer to me. "How about one date?"

I stared at her for a long moment, unsure whether she was joking or not. The longer I looked, the longer I could see that she was serious, and that she was in trouble, and that as a slum girl she probably didn't have a whole lot to pay me with. I gave her a nod and turned back around to approach the man who was still waiting with a smile. He cocked his head at me as I stood before him.

"I don't know who you are, but..." I started, but I was interrupted by a brief memory flashing through my mind, leaving as quickly as it came. My own words felt like they echoed back at me, and I shook my head. "You don't know me?"

I heard another voice in my head, familiar but uncomfortable. "I know you," the voice said, and for a moment I heard the crackling of fire. I dismissed the thoughts again. I didn't know what was going on, probably some reaction to the recent fall I took, but it had no place interfering with my work.

"Oh yeah... I know you," I said, another memory coming back to me. "That uniform..." I tensed as I watched three Shinra infantrymen come through the door and join the man. They all laughed as the red headed guy started to speak.

"Hey sis," he said, looking past me and locking eyes with Aerith, "this one's a little weird."

"Shut up! You Shinra spy!" I said, throwing my arm out to my side.

"Reno!" one of the infantrymen said, turning to his boss. "Want him taken out?" The man, apparently Reno, gave me a long hard look before turning his eyes on the infantryman and shrugging.

"I haven't decided yet," he said, sticking his hands in his pockets. This guy wasn't taking me seriously at all.

"Don't fight here!" Aerith protested. "You'll ruin the flowers!" She started to run, so I didn't really have a whole lot of choice but to follow her. She was heading towards the back of the church and to a small open door. "The exit is back here."

I looked back as we ran through the door, surprised to see that Reno and the infantrymen were just standing in the same spot, watching us leave. The next room was a mess. It looked like it had been some kind of bell tower in the past, but now it was full of collapsed pillars and rotting wood. Most of it, however, looked like it would be sturdy enough to hold our weight, but possibly not the weight of our four pursuers. Unfortunately, it looked like the only possible exit was a hole in the roof at the top of the tower.

Aerith and I clambered over a couple of broken pillars and started to run up the stairs in the middle of the room. We made our way to a higher section of wooden floor overlooking the crumbled debris below, just before Reno and the infantrymen decided to join us.

"There they are, over there!" Reno shouted from below us.

"Cloud, it's him!" Aerith said, looking off over the edge.

"I know," I said, looking down at them as well. "Looks like they aren't going to let us go." I looked ahead of us at a long stretch of broken wood that stood between us and the next set of stairs. I knew I could make the jump, but I wasn't sure if Aerith would be able to.

"What should we do?" she asked me, apparently thinking the same thing as me.

"Well, we can't let them catch us, can we?" I said, turning around to face her. "Then, there's only one thing left." I turned back around and broke into a run, leaping over the section of broken wood and landing safely on the other side. "Aerith! This way!" She looked over gap between me and her and shook her head. "Come on, you can make it!"

"The Ancient is getting away!" Reno yelled from below. "Attack! Attack! Attack!"

A barrage of bullets came up from below, not aimed directly at Aerith, but at the wooden floor she stood on. Bits of wood broke off and crumbled under the girl, and she fell down onto a slanted pillar below, sliding all the way to the ground floor.

"Aerith!" I yelled, watching as the infantrymen closed in on her position. A bit of relief washed over me when I saw her stand up, but the first soldier was already confronting her.

"Cloud, help!" She shouted, stepping away from the man.

"Damn!" I stood up tall, quickly scanning the area for anything that could help me. My eyes found a couple of barrels sitting up on the rafters of the place, and I immediately ran up the next set of stairs to get to them. Reaching the first barrel, I did my best to position myself right, staring down at the infantryman below. "Here goes nothing!"

I pushed the barrel right off the side, and watched as it fell flat on top of Aerith's attacker. She jumped from surprise, but quickly started to run back up the stairs to where she fell. I noticed another infantryman headed her direction, so I found another barrel and tried my luck again. When that barrel dropped, it rolled down the slanted pillar and ran over the man before he even knew what was coming.

Halfway up the stairs, Aerith was being followed by the third infantryman. I had two more barrels and one man. Too easy. I knocked a barrel off over a portion of the stairs that Aerith had already crossed. It missed the infantryman, but shattered the stairs around him and took him with it. Finally, I ran back down the second set of stairs to meet Aerith on the either side of the gap. She looked worried, but still prepared herself for a jump. Giving me a final look, she started running and leaped as far as she could. She just missed, but I caught her wrist and helped her up.

"Thanks, Cloud," she said, standing herself up. "We're almost out!"

I kept close to her as we went up the next set of stairs and ran across the rafters towards our escape. It didn't seem as though anyone was following us anymore, but we didn't take a break until I'd helped her out of the hole and we found ourselves on the roof of the church, standing in the dull light of the slums.

"Ha, ha..." Aerith laughed a little between her deep breaths. "They're looking for me again."

I sat down on the slant of the roof, letting myself relax a bit as well.

"You mean it's not the first time they've been after you?" I asked, and she slowly shook her head.

"No..." She didn't look at me as she answered, and after a moment of silence I decided to speak.

"They're the Turks," I said, and she sort of hummed in response. "The Turks are an organization in Shinra. They scout for possible candidates for SOLDIER."

"This violently?" she asked in disbelief, turning her head to look at me. "I thought they were kidnapping someone."

"They're also involved in a lot of dirty stuff on the side," I explained, shrugging my shoulders. "Spying, murder... you know."

"They look like it." Aerith stared back down into the hole we just climbed out of.

"But, why are they after you?" I questioned, leaning back where I sat. "There must be a reason, right?"

"No, not really," she said, pausing for a long moment and then laughing. "I think they believe I have what it takes to be in SOLDIER!"

"Maybe you do," I said, smiling a little and standing back up. "You want to join?"

"I don't know," she said, smiling back at me and gently shrugging her shoulders. "But I don't want to get caught by _those_ people!"

"Then, let's go!" I said, gesturing my arm and heading towards the hills of junk and debris near the church. I hopped onto a nearby sheet of metal, and Aerith laughed a little before joining me.

We proceeded to travel from sheet of metal to rooftop to pillar to scrap, just to put a little distance between ourselves and the church. I let my mind wander as I led Aerith along. I would have never guessed that this was where my life would lead me when I left my hometown to join SOLDIER: fighting off the Turks and climbing piles of junk. It actually wasn't all that bad.

"Wait! Wait, I said!" I heard Aerith call from behind me. Just from how far away her voice was, I could tell even before turning around that I'd been going a bit too fast. I watched as she slowly hopped from a pillar to a rooftop, and from that rooftop over to where I was, stumbling a little. She stopped in front of me, leaning over and breathing heavily. "Slow... down... Don't leave me..."

"Funny..." I said, watching her catch her breath. "I thought you were cut out to be in SOLDIER?"

"Oh! You're terrible!" She said, standing up and swinging her arms by her sides.

She kept a glare on her face for as long as she could manage, but she quickly broke down into a laugh. I think I actually laughed a little myself. She smiled and her eyes drifted off a bit. From her silence, I could tell that she was thinking about something. She turned her eyes back to me and spoke.

"Hey, Cloud? Were you... ever in SOLDIER?" She asked, and I tensed up a bit. That was an awfully strange question to come out of nowhere. After a moment, I finally answered her.

"I used to be. How did you guess?"

"Your eyes," she answered, stepping a little closer. "They have a strange glow..."

"That's the sign of those who have been infused with Mako... A mark of SOLDIER." I said, something uncomfortable itching at the back of my mind. "But, how did you know about that?"

"...Oh, nothing," she said with a shake of her head.

"Nothing...?"

"Right, nothing!" She said, smiling a broad smile. "Come on! Let's go, bodyguard!"

We traveled a little bit longer on the debris until we came close to a quiet path a ways from the church. I hopped down a few last pieces of junk onto the road, and turned around to wait for Aerith. As soon as she got down, she breathed a sigh of relief and brushed herself off.

"Whew! Finally made it off!" she said, looking around us. "Now what..."

"Well, which way is your house?" I asked, looking down the path in one direction. After a minute of getting no response from Aerith, I looked back to her, hoping we weren't lost. "Aerith...?"

She was staring, wide-eyed past me, her lips parted ever so slightly. I hadn't seen her look like that before. Then, I heard someone speak from behind me: the same voice I'd heard when I fell.

"You've got a date already, huh?" the voice said, and I spun around to face the man.

The first thing I saw was a flash of white that felt blinding. My eyes began to adjust and widen, and I felt my heart-rate picking up. The person standing before me was so familiar, and it was both comfortable and frightening at the same time. He had black hair and was wearing a uniform like my own, and he was... smiling.

"Girls just love the uniform!" he said with a laugh. "Isn't that right, Cloud?"

I saw another flash of white, and this time it was accompanied by a shrill, constant noise. I felt a pain shoot through my head, and I threw my hands up into my hair. As the noise grew louder and louder, I fell onto my knees. I heard the man say my name again, this time more worried, and as my vision turned white, I saw him reach out to me.

"Cloud!"


	61. A SOLDIER's Memory Part 2

**Zack**

It felt unreal when I found myself running towards Aerith's church, feeling the air of the slums becoming just a little bit cleaner the closer I got. There was something sort of magical about that place, or maybe I just felt that way because a little while ago I survived a ridiculous fall and woke up there in a bed of flowers, and to a rather angelic face. Either way, the fact that it had been over four years since I'd last seen Aerith was catching up with me more than ever, and with every step I took I wanted to see her more. Then, suddenly, all of those feelings were forced to stop short as quickly as my feet. I moved to find some cover behind a bit of debris, and peaked out to look upon a small group of people who were standing out in front of the building. Those uniforms were way too familiar. There were three Shinra infantrymen, pacing and readying themselves for who knows what, and with them was one of the Turks: Reno, who had apparently known how to get there a bit faster than I did. But what the hell did they want with Aerith? Was Tseng trying to stop me from going to her?

I waited a few more moments, trying to come up with a plan to make it inside. As far as I knew, there was only the one entrance to the church, and it was being effectively guarded at the moment. Just as I began to wonder why they were just hanging around outside, Reno made his move and entered the building, followed shortly afterward by the three men. That was my chance. Taking a quick glance around to make sure there were no stray troops, I made my way to the door of the church and watched on. By the time I got there, I just saw Aerith disappearing into the back room of the church, fleeing Reno and his men, but there was someone else with her. The mysterious man who seemed to be helping her escape disappeared right behind her, but I managed to catch a glimpse of two things before he did: blond hair and a very familiar sword mounted on his back. My heart felt like it stopped in my chest. I thought I couldn't have been seeing what I thought I saw. How would that be possible?

That was when I started to run. I ran right around the walls of the church, searching for another entrance that I'd been unaware of. I found nothing but more debris as I got around back. Then I heard gunshots coming from inside. I began to run back to the church entrance, clutching the hilt of the First Tsurugi. It looked as though my first conflict with the Turks was going to be sooner than I'd wanted. I came through the open door of the building, drawing my sword, knowing that I wouldn't let anything happen to Aerith. Just as I was going to charge into battle, I spotted Aerith leaving the church through an exit up in the rafters. Of course, the hole in the roof! I could hear Reno talking in the next room, and it sounded like defeat. Aerith had outsmarted him, or maybe it was the other man who saved her. I returned the sword to my back, letting my eyes drift across the room, over the flowers and the broken bits of wood. Could that really have been Cloud with her?

Regaining my focus, I turned back around and left the church. I turned my eyes upward, and sure enough I could see Aerith making her escape across the piles of junk, following a ways behind the blond man. I supposed she must have gotten tough over the years, living in the slums. As gentle and loving as Aerith was, she knew how to survive. I might not have known my way around the slums too well, but if there was something that I _did_ know, it was how to keep up. I started off after the two, keeping my eyes on Aerith to the best of my ability while following the debris on ground level. The other man had made some distance in front of her, and wasn't currently in my line of sight. I smiled to myself, picking up my pace as the paths on the ground started to curve around the junk. I was going to see them soon. I was going to see Aerith, and I was going to see him. That had to be him. For some reason, I knew in my gut that was him, and that just made me run faster.

I slowed to a stop, reaching a corner in the path, and leaned my back against a large sheet of metal. I could hear them climbing down to the ground just around that corner. So close. Then, I heard his voice; I heard Cloud's voice. It _was_ him. He didn't say anything special. He was asking a question, some completely normal thing to say, but it didn't matter. That was all the confirmation I needed. It was him, and I couldn't wait any longer.

I stepped out, holding my breath and looking far more serious than I meant to. There he was. Cloud's back was facing me, but I could see his hair: messed from something he'd just been through. He was still wearing the SOLDIER uniform, but it was covered in spots of dirt and soot, and he wore a heavy looking metal wrist accessory. Even from the back, it looked like he had grown. Then there was Aerith, dressed in pink, facing Cloud, facing me. Our eyes locked, and her mouth opened ever so slightly. She'd gone silent, never having answered Cloud's question. I couldn't seem to muster up the ability to speak myself.

"Aerith...?" Cloud asked, and my eyes broke away to look back at him. I smiled and pulled myself together, planting my hands on my hips.

"You've got a date already, huh?" I asked him, and he spun around to face me. There were his eyes on me: the green and blue Mako eyes that I'd gotten to know after Nibelheim, and yet the same eyes that I'd known for so much longer. He had a sharp intake of air when he saw me, and it was all I could do to hold myself back from him, to make sure that he was real. "Girls just love the uniform!" I said, getting myself to laugh. "Isn't that right, Cloud?"

All of a sudden, he grunted and threw his hands up onto his head as if suddenly in pain.

"Cloud?" I said again, dropping my hands from my hips and taking a step forward. He fell to his knees, still gripping his head. "Cloud!" I called to him, holding my hand out and running over to meet him. I skidded down onto my knees to catch him before he went face first into the dirt. Turning him over to see his face, I could tell that he was unconscious now. "What happened to him?" I asked, feeling around his chest for injuries.

"I don't know! He had a bad fall..." Aerith said, getting down on the other side of Cloud. "Here, I can heal him!" She moved her hands over Cloud's body, and as I moved, I found my hand under hers. I looked up from Cloud, and Aerith was staring at me, her eyes shifting quickly between mine. "You came back," she said softly and almost in a whisper. "The last time we talked, you promised to come back... and you did."

"Yeah," I said, nodding my head once. "I wouldn't let anything stop me." She smiled so softly and warmly that I forgot for a moment that we were in the slums, and turned her eyes back down to Cloud, drawing a shining green orb from a basket on her arm. My eyes went wide when I realized it was a materia, but what was more shocking was that she took it in her hands and cast a spell over Cloud. It took special training to learn how to use materia, but here she was: using it like a pro.

"He should be okay," she said after a moment, returning the orb to the basket and standing back up. Her dress had patches of dirt by the knees that she brushed away as she spoke. "We should get him to somewhere he can rest. Zack..." she paused, clasping her hands in front of her. "Would you like to see my house?"

I followed Aerith down the paths of the slums, carrying Cloud in my arms, until we started to pass by some of the areas that looked less like garbage piles and more like makeshift neighborhoods. It was so strange to think about the fact that Aerith traveled those streets on a regular basis. There were so many ruffians around and even the occasional monster that slipped in through one of the gates to the city, or maybe one of the sewers. I supposed that she really must have known how to take care of herself a bit better than I'd thought. That, and she was probably one of those people that had a natural affinity to avoiding trouble: quite the opposite of myself. I guess I hadn't really ever considered the fact that she had a house either. It seemed kind of like she lived over in that church with the flowers. Feeling guilty over my lack of knowledge about friends, I considered that perhaps I had to learn to stop talking about myself so often and take a little interest in others. After all, what's a hero to the people without his people?

Cloud made a small noise while I was carrying him, and it was quite reminiscent of our travels after Nibelheim. I was looking forward to the time where I would actually get to have a two-sided conversation with him again. I wondered how much I didn't know about Cloud just because I didn't bother to ask.

"You know," Aerith said all of a sudden, stopping and turning to face me. "I've seen that thing he did before: when he held his head and passed out." She gestured behind herself to the entrance of a house that seemed to be made from a large piece of piping. "This guy are sick. He passed out in the same way when we found him nearby and somebody helped him here. He doesn't seem to be able to talk, and the only thing we have to identify him with is a tattoo. I think it was the number two." She stepped closer to me and looked Cloud over suspiciously. "He doesn't have a numbered tattoo, does he?"

"No," I said, shaking my head. "I mean, I don't think so." She stared into my eyes for a moment and changed her expression back to that one I was starting to think meant she was just messing with me.

"Come on," she said, turning on her heal. "We're almost there now." I found some relief in her words, as Cloud seemed to have put on some muscle and the Buster Sword wasn't a lightweight addition. Of course, after spending a few months in a bed, I probably needed the exercise. I sneaked in another smile at Cloud before continuing to follow.

Aerith led me passed a couple of small junk shops and mobile homes and down a small dirt road. At the end, we came to the nicest looking house I'd seen in the slums by far. The house was made from wood and stone mostly, patched with metal only where it needed to be, and it was one of the few that seemed to be painted. Even nicer than the house was the large garden it sat next to: patches of yellow flowers and grass growing up from the dirt, clearly Aerith's work. She wouldn't have had to tell me that this was _her_ house.

She glanced back at me and opened the door, inviting me in. There were flowers inside as well, and it was furnished pretty nicely for a place in the slums.

"I'm home, mom." Aerith's voice startled me a bit as she had been surprisingly quiet. Either that, or the idea of Aerith's mom startled me. The last time I went to meet someone's mom I had a little bit of time to prepare. I figured I'd just have to turn on the charm quickly, and hope that the bullet holes in my armor didn't bother her much.

A women in an apron and a green dress stepped out from another room to greet us. Her hair was pulled back in a bun, and she was wearing a worried expression when she saw me and Cloud. Aerith stepped up close to her mother and turned to face me.

"This is Zack and Cloud." She introduced us, pointing as she said the names. "They're my bodyguards."

"Oh my. Is he alright?" the woman asked, switching glances from Cloud to Aerith. "Were you followed again? Are you alright? You're not hurt, are you?"

"I'm alright." Aerith nodded once. "I had them with me." Her mother hesitated, then she nodded and turned to face me.

"Thank you," she said with a gentle bow.

"Zack Fair, SOL..." I found myself interrupted by the realization that I was neither a SOLDIER nor capable of holding out my hand at the time. "Bodyguard," I finished.

"I'm Elmyra," she said with a nod of her head. "I'll go prepare a bed for your friend." She gave Cloud one last worried look and turned away to walk upstairs. Aerith turned back to me.

"So what are you going to do now?" She tilted her head with the question, and I wasn't really sure what she meant.

"Well, I guess I'm gonna wait for Cloud to wake up," I said, but she already didn't look satisfied with the answer.

"I mean, in the city," she clarified. "You're not going to keep working for Shinra, are you?"

"Not even if I wanted to," I said, shaking my head. "That company is a lot more screwed up than I thought."

"They said you were dead, you know," she said, looking serious. "But... I knew you weren't."

"Are you sure?" I asked, cocking my head a bit. "I think that was the first time you actually looked surprised when I showed up." She smiled a little but I could tell she was sort of upset.

"Well, sometimes it's hard to tell whether I'm sure or just hopeful." She paused and averted her eyes, looking over some flowers instead. "I was worried about you."

"I'm sorry," I said, taking a step towards her. "If there was any way I could have contacted you and known that you were safe..."

"I know..." she said, looking at me again. "I'm just glad that you're back."

Elmyra came back down the stairs a few moments later and walked over to us.

"Aerith? Would you please go find some pillows for the bed?" she asked and Aerith nodded.

"Sure," Aerith agreed and walked towards the stairs. "I'll be right back, Zack."

Aerith's mother watched her go, and waited until she had disappeared up the stairs before turning her attention to me. I could already tell from the conflicted look on her face that there was something wrong.

"That glow in your eyes..." she started, looking hard at me, "you're from SOLDIER, right?"

"Yeah," I said. "Rather, I used to be." She nodded and was silent for another moment.

"I don't know how to say this, but..." She stood a bit taller, as if to give herself courage. "Would you please leave here tonight, without telling Aerith?"

"Huh?" was all I could manage to say. That was a bit worse than I expected to hear.

"It's nothing personal, but... you _used_ to be from SOLDIER and you were fighting Shinra before you came here. From the looks of your friend, it was pretty dangerous." She looked down and the extra height she had given herself seemed to ease away. "Aerith means well, and has the best heart I've ever seen... but she doesn't need her life to be any more dangerous."

"Yeah... okay..." I said, stuck in a place between shocked and upset. "I understand..."

"Zack!" Aerith called, peeking out from the top of the stairs. "You can bring Cloud up now!" I forced a smile at her and started off towards the stairs.

"Thank you," Elmyra said behind me. "I'm sorry."

I forced myself to change my mindset as Aerith and I situated Cloud onto a bed. There was no point in feeling sorry for anything right now, since I finally had so much to be happy about. I smiled as I placed Cloud's head on a pillow, hoping that he'd wake up before we had to move out. Taking a step back, I noticed Aerith looking him over again, the same way she'd done several times since I'd been with her.

"So this is Cloud, huh?" she asked, and I detected a hidden agenda behind the question and the upturned edges of her smile. Or perhaps I was paranoid. This _was_ the first opportunity I had to really stop and think about Cloud and Aerith in the same place. It brought back the feeling I got when I first realized how I felt about Cloud, and as much as I liked Aerith, how Cloud was the one I was really drawn to. It was strange, because I never really had enough opportunity to tell Cloud how I felt, not really, and I definitely hadn't had a chance to tell her. Somehow, I felt like taking longer to answer her simple question just made things worse.

"Yeah," I said, unable to think of any more words. She walked up close to me.

"He _is_ nice," she said, and then she hugged me. "It's late, and I'm going to bed," she said with her head over my shoulder. "Get some rest. I'll be in the next room if you need anything."

"Thanks, Aerith," I said, watching her walk towards the door to the room.

"And Zack..." she added, looking back before she left. "Goodnight."

I smiled as she closed the door, turning my attention back to Cloud. I felt so bad about the idea of leaving Aerith in the middle of the night, and about having to move Cloud back out of bed before he even woke up, but I couldn't just ignore what her mother said. Even still, the night was young and I needed a bit of rest myself. I came to a decision: I would give Cloud some time, regain my strength, and then be on my way. Elmyra was right, Aerith really didn't need the danger, and I wasn't ready to live the quiet life just yet.


	62. A SOLDIER's Memory Part 3

**Cloud**

I dreamed of fire again. It felt as though that was all I ever dreamed of anymore. Fire and pain and destruction and the feeling of utter hopelessness. Except this time something was different: I didn't feel hopeless just because I couldn't save anyone. The hopelessness went further back than that. It went back before going to Nibelheim, before being a SOLDIER first class, or even second, or... third. The hopelessness went back to feeling stuck, to being told I couldn't live my dream, to being asked to accept the likelihood of death on the field of battle, to being replaceable... disposable. The feeling went back to... back to being rejected from SOLDIER. I never made it in. I was never a SOLDIER. Why couldn't I be in SOLDIER?

There was a voice then, and slowly an image began to form. It was an image of a man, so far beyond my reach and yet trying so hard to be close. He was telling me that I was a SOLDIER, that I was everything a SOLDIER was meant to be. He was trusting me, believing in me, and reaching out to me... but then there was a gunshot, and it all ended.

Then I woke, drenched in sweat and gasping to get air in my lungs. Feeling the pull of bedsheets over me, I let my eyes focus and calmed as I found myself in a small bedroom, with a mild breeze blowing the smell of flowers through spotted drapes. I sat up promptly, clutching the sheets of the bed in my hand, still trying to shake off the fright that I couldn't quite explain. I turned my eyes, slowly scanning the room. I didn't really know what I was looking for until I found it, but there he was. Asleep on the sofa across from my bed, there he was: the boy with spiky black hair, the man who believed in me.

Zack. I mouthed the name as I thought it, and as my head was rushing. I remembered him. I remembered him so well, but it was so hard to look at him. Despite the darkness of the room, looking at Zack Fair felt like looking at the sun, so grand and so bright, and something you could never hope to reach. He felt impossible, and it made me feel impossible. I was there when he died, and yet there he was. I was a SOLDIER first class, and yet I wasn't. It was him. It was Zack Fair. It was the man who was like the sun: bright and strong and impossible, living the life and the dream that I knew now I wasn't capable of.

For the longest time, I was ready to give up SOLDIER and to give up Shinra and anything else in my life just so that being close to him didn't feel wrong. I knew he never wanted me to stand-sharp and salute him, or to call him sir or boss or to wait on him for my next orders. I knew that, but nobody else did. The ranks of SOLDIER first class and infantryman created layers and layers of boundaries between us, and even when we were alone I could never, but for a few mesmerizing seconds, shake the feeling that we shouldn't be close, that we shouldn't hold hands, and that we should never _ever_ have kissed.

For the longest time, I was ready to give up my dreams just to finally feel comfortable holding him close, and yet here I was now. I knew that Shinra had betrayed us, that all boundaries were gone and all chains were severed, but I just couldn't. In the past, I would have moved to the sofa and let him wake up to find me, but now I could barely look at him. My heart started racing and my breath began to pick up. I held a hand to my mouth to try and silence it. I couldn't wake him. I couldn't talk to him. I had to leave.

I didn't stop to think about what I was doing until I'd left the room, left the house and planted my back firmly against the door. My eyes shut, I took a deep breath and let in the air. It was so fresh and cool that I could barely believe my eyes when they opened to find that I was still in the slums. That didn't matter though, in fact it was safer for me down there, and I would be able to find my way to Sector Seven and back to Tifa. I took another deep breath and started to walk, fighting the troubled thoughts in my head.

Finding Tifa was what I needed: a person who knew me as I was. I was so happy that Zack was alive, but happy for him and not for me. There was still something inside me that wanted to go back and embrace him, but so much was changed. Thinking of his face made me feel like I was suffering from a bad poison. Thinking of the times we spent together made me think of everything I wasn't. For a while, I 'd gotten to the point where I had accepted my place as an infantryman, and basically accepted that my hopes and dreams had failed me. It was hard enough to have Zack talk to me as his equal when I had that kind of failure on my shoulders, but it became nice and he even managed to pull me back into the hope that one day I might still live my dream. But now I _had_ lived my dream, and that dream became a nightmare, and that reality was taken away from me. It didn't feel as though I was hoping to grow stronger and rise to my potential, but instead I was falling from it. I could neither live up to my dreams, nor could I maintain what I thought I was.

No, I couldn't talk to Zack, because he didn't know me anymore. So much had changed, and I felt like nothing but anger and failure. I was the flames in my dreams, bringing nothing but ruin. And if that was all I was then I would bring that ruin down on Shinra, because they were the one thing that hadn't changed. They were the ones who ruined my life, who ruined Tifa's life, and ruined Zack's life. They were the ones who left all of the people under the plate to starvation and pain, and they were sucking out the very blood of the planet just for a profit. They were going to suffer for what they did. They...

"You're a fast walker," I heard a voice behind me say. I stopped short and drew in air, slowly turning to face Zack. "But not so good at sneaking."

"Uh..." was all I could manage to get out of my mouth at first. He was still hard to look at, but at the same time as he stood tall in front of me and spoke, it felt like he pulled at something inside me that I had buried: something that remembered hope and his hand brushing against my wrist.

"I'm used to carrying you around," he continued with a soft laugh, "but just because you can walk again doesn't mean you gotta run off."

I continued to stay silent, taking in the mako swirl in his eyes as it stood against the darkness of the night, the worry in them contradicting the smile at the edges of his mouth. I swallowed, trying to keep focused and battling between wanting to look at him and wanting to avert my eyes. He took one step closer, leaving a little more than arms reach between us.

"You know, I'd really like to hear you say something," he said, looking as though he wanted to come even closer, but for some reason he was holding back. "I don't know if you heard me before now, but it's been such I long time since I've heard you talk."

"Zack," I finally said, wanting to hear his name. "I have to go alone... I... I'm different now... I have..."

I was interrupted as he quickly stepped forward and took me in his arms, pulling me close to his chest. I felt my breath start to increase again, and put my hands to his chest as if to push away, but something inside me gave in.

"You're alive," Zack said firmly, next to my ear. It caught me off guard. He spoke to me still with the voice of a SOLDIER, full of heroism and leadership, but not the tone I expected. Not the tone suggested by his fingertips pressing into the back of my shirt. "You're alive, and there's no way I'm letting you go alone."

I stood there for a long moment, letting my arms slowly fall off of his chest and hang at my sides. My eyes shifted, scanning the ground and the fabric of his uniform against me. My mind was rushing, but my heartbeat slowed. I didn't know what to think. I didn't even know if I wanted to return Zack's embrace. It felt like I'd missed so much of my life, and so many things didn't make sense that it made me question what other parts had been a lie.

"How did it happen?" I asked, starting almost in a whisper. When Zack didn't respond, I took a step back away from him, out of his grasp, and stared him in the eyes. "How did you survive?"

"Does it matter?" he said, wilting a bit from my cold response.

"Did it even happen?" I asked, raising my voice a bit. "Because until tonight, I thought I was a SOLDIER! Every friendship I thought I'd made, all the reputation amongst the ranks, the battles I fought... how do I know if any of that was real!?"

"You –"

"Who the hell _are_ you!?" I yelled, but I knew who he was. He was who I had been living. He was the one I was missing so much without even remembering his face. He was the hole I felt in the back of my mind that I filled with fake memories, but now that he was here, that hole was so much bigger. I felt my heart rate increase again and I began to pant. The memories were piecing themselves together at an alarming speed, erasing new thoughts and replacing them with my old ones. I could hear a ringing in my head again, and I needed something to focus my mind, so I drew my blade.

"Please," I said, offering no more explanation. Zack was startled and took a step back, but after a moment he reluctantly drew a new sword from his back and grasped it in front of him.

I ran at Zack and swung the Buster Sword over my head and hard into his blade. The metal clanged and clanged again as I threw another attack. I struck again, higher, causing Zack to arch back and raise the sword to block me. All of a sudden, he pressed forward, parrying my attack and leaving him the opportunity to make one of his own. The Buster Sword was wide and I managed to block myself from his attack easily, but the sheer force of the blow pushed me back along the ground, leaving a trail from my shoes in the dirt. The sound of the impact caused a ringing in my ear, but it was exactly what I needed to stop the ringing in my mind.

I threw myself at him again, and the two of us exchanged blow after blow, battle sounds echoing through the dark streets. I was so focused on the battle that I hadn't noticed it change, but Zack's expression was a broad smile and determined eyes, sweat beginning to bead on his brow. Even noticing this, I hadn't realized that I'd broken a sweat myself. I struck again and again, and blocked the returning attacks. With every clash, my mind became more clear. Even so, I drew a materia from my pocket without a thought, and as the final memories fitted themselves back into place, I released a bolt of lighting at Zack. He dove out of the way, raising a hand for me to stop, but at that point the materia had already fallen to the ground along with the Buster Sword.

The last flood of memories were painful as they returned: Zack teaching me to cast ice, the fear of confronting Tifa, and the fires of Nibelheim. I clutched my hands into fists and screamed at the plate above me. Zack came to my side, but the next thing I really remembered as my mind settled, was being slumped down on the ground, back against a metal wall. Zack was sitting next to me, and we were both panting and sweating from the fight. I turned my eyes to him, and he had his head leaned back, staring upward, still wearing a smile between his breathes. Apparently, he wasn't bothered by anything I'd just done. Either that, or somehow he understood why I did it.

"Thank you," I said, exhaling and feeling the first sense of true calm I'd felt in a long time.

"I don't know... where you learned... to fight like that," he said, still catching his breath, "but I like it."

"Hmmm." I sighed a comfortable sigh, letting my eyes drift across the ground and the marks left by my shoes. "This might sound strange, but I think I know who I am now."

Zack turned his head to look at me. He was silent for a moment. "And who I am?"

"Yeah," I said, leaning my head back a bit. "You're alive."

"We both are," he added, turning his eyes back to the plate as well. "I guess that makes us pretty special."

I didn't say anything else, and neither did he. We sat there, in the dust, and the quiet, and I let my hand find his. It wasn't everything I wanted, all I knew I longed for, but it was exactly what I needed, and as the faint rays of sun began to seep through the cracks in the outer wall, I finally felt as though my life wasn't over. All I needed now was to find the right beginning.


End file.
